r/CautiousBB • u/plantiesinatwist • 22d ago
Hi all,
Our mod team was recently approached by BetterHelp, an online subscription-based therapy provider, to do an AMA within our subreddit by a licensed therapist that specializes in child loss, perinatal mental health, and anxiety. They are willing to provide credentials to our mod team to verify the individual responding to questions, but our team has reached a moral impasse that we need the community to weigh in on.
Up until now, our team has had a blanket rule to not allow any companies, researchers, institutions, or anyone else with private interests to post within our community because our space is filled with so many vulnerable humans going through extremely difficult situations. The fertility space, in general, is ripe with opportunity for those that might take advantage of this vulnerability, much less a space like ours. That said, the message they sent was clearly written very thoughtfully, and the provider they’re willing to assign to the AMA would be willing to answer people’s questions about their worries, maybe provide healthy coping mechanisms, and describe the subspecialties of therapy that could be most beneficial to the people here.
Of course, the major issue for us as a mod team is that we are NOT endorsing BetterHelp as a specific company or resource. For folks that are in areas where they aren’t able to find an in person provider, online therapy through any number of companies may be helpful. We are not partnering with them and the language in the AMA will be very clear about that. We will also be making sure that the provider answering questions in the AMA does not promote the BetterHelp brand.
If you’ve read this long, thanks for bearing with us. We appreciate how the people of this community come together to support one another and are grateful to help moderate.
r/CautiousBB • u/HotPut5470 • Jan 27 '26
As an OBGYN ultrasound tech working at the general level here's a few things I would love the community to know based on common questions I see.
OBGYN docs are going to pay the most attention to the fetal pole and heart rate. Once a fetal pole is seen, the CRL (crown rump length) measurements are gold standard.
I'm worried about the heart rate:
-Check out this resource for pregnancies dating less than 7 weeks. Make sure to refer not to your LMP dates, but measured CRL dates: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/fetal-bradycardia?lang=us
-After 7 weeks a normal heartrate is between 120-180. It can temporarily dip below or temporarily rise above this range, but prolonged time above/below will definitely get your doctor's attention especially in third trimester. Generally out of range heart rates trigger NST (non stress test) or more monitoring.
The measurements are off:
Baby measures behind LMP. This is actually pretty common, we often see dates off up to a week either direction. We don't ovulate on the exact same day of the cycle each month or even have the same length of cycle. With irregular periods, PCOS, or unknown dates even larger gaps can be perfectly fine. If you aren't sure of your dates, trust the ultrasound. Even if you are sure of your dates, don't panic if they are a week off. Ultrasound measurements in early pregnancy are +/- 5 days.
I'm in limbo and don't know if my ultrasounds are diagnostic for loss:
By ultrasound there are strict parameters to diagnose loss. No one wants to get this wrong. Check out this resource for a list of parameters diagnostic for loss: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/early-pregnancy-loss-1?lang=us
Note, there is a second list of "suspicious for loss". Keep in mind the second list is not diagnostic, things can still turn out just fine.
I don't know when I should see what on ultrasound:
Things can vary a bit from person to person and do change *quickly* in early pregnancy. Check out this resource for what you can generally expect to see:
https://radiopaedia.org/articles/early-pregnancy?lang=us
Should I go to a boutique or get a private scan? Or push for an earlier scan?
They aren't legal where I am but here's a few things to consider if you plan to book a private scan. First, what are the qualifications of the person running the ultrasound? An ultrasound is only as good as the one performing it. It sounds as if these boutiques are NOT permitted to give much/any information. Will you spiral if you believe you see bad news and they cannot confirm or deny it? Also it seems that many cannot do vaginal ultrasound, which will make seeing a baby under 7 or 8 weeks challenging. If I had the option of a boutique ultrasound I would personally wait until 8 weeks and I would book it for a weekday. If they see something bad, it is not ideal to find out over a weekend when there is no option to follow up with your doc. An earlier scan often causes more anxiety, not less. It's SO hard to wait. But if you can tolerate it wait until 8 weeks or so.
The gestation sac is small/big:
-Gestation sac measurements are not terrifically accurate. Where I work once a baby is seen the gestation sac isn't measured. A mismatch between baby's size and the gestation sac size isn't uncommon. That said, a mean sac diameter of 25 mm or more without a baby is diagnostic for loss.
The yolk sac is small/big:
It starts teeny tiny, and will get a bit bigger. Once a baby with a good heartbeat is visualized, the docs I work for don't seem to care about the size of the yolk sac. A failed pregnancy with an expanded yolk sac (more than 6 mm) is a suggestive of chromosomal abnormalities.
We don't know where the pregnancy is:
The statistically most likely outcome is either a chemical pregnancy or just coming in for ultrasound too early for visualization. Ectopic can't be ruled out, and many wise ladies in the this sub have unfortunately experienced this and can give more info than I can. Statistically it's believed that only 1-2% of pregnancies are ectopic, but listen to your body. If the location is unknown, you should be getting close monitoring and follow up until the location is known or the pregnancy has ended.
-For a resource on ectopic pregnancy: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/ectopic-pregnancy?lang=us A note, a pseudosac is visualized in only 10-20% of ectopics. Therefore a sac in the uterus is suggestive of intrauterine pregnancy but can't be proven until a yolk sac is also present.
What about my HCG numbers?
I'm not an expert on this at all. But here's a resource: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/beta-hcg-1?lang=us
Why didn't my ultrasound tech tell me anything? And/or why were they so optimistic? Or, I had an ultrasound in the ER and they were very pessimistic.
Many locations an ultrasound tech can very much lose their job if they say aNyThInG. Where they are permitted to say certain things some ultrasound techs may just be hoping the best. We work with the public and we have seen some wild stuff. Additionally no one wants to call it a loss unless its 1000% certain. We know how devastating that news is. A side note here, often an ultrasound in the ER is not an ideal experience for the patient. The ER is staffed with techs that are much more versed in gallbladder and liver scans than they they are early pregnancy ultrasound. Don't hesitate to go the ER if you are having concerning symptoms, but do know the ER doc will make sure you aren't actively dying then will likely refer you back to your OB for follow up.
I'm just so anxious about it all:
Someone awesome wrote out these mantras. Maybe they will help: https://www.reddit.com/r/PregnancyAfterLoss/comments/14uhbdg/commandments_of_pregnancy_after_loss_this_is_now/
Also a podcast I personally found very helpful with anxiety: https://www.oneyoufeed.net/russ-harris-part-1/
https://www.oneyoufeed.net/russ-harris-part-2/
Today you are pregnant and this baby is so loved. I really am hoping the best for each of you. Those of us who have experienced loss.... you didn't do anything wrong, I promise. This is a club no one deserved to be in. And you are not silly, foolish, or dramatic for grieving your little babe for as long as you need to.
This post is written in honor of Eli, who died long before I could meet him. Rest in peace, buddy. I miss you tremendously ❤️
r/CautiousBB • u/moonlightxo29 • 48m ago
Currently 6w1d and have been taking NAC since before my positive test. ( Started in June ) but has anyone continued taking it throughout the first trimester and had a successful pregnancy? This is the farthest I’ve made it in a pregnancy and I’m wondering if I should stop taking it?
r/CautiousBB • u/SundaeTop8942 • 2h ago
I recently had an abdominal scan at 6w4d but I was measuring 6w6d and the fetal heart rate was measured at 145. Is there any way that can be right? From everything I’ve seen that seems pretty high for how far along I am? I know it being slower than normal is a red flag but is it also concerning if it was that high?
r/CautiousBB • u/ResourceOdd7346 • 12h ago
I wish I had a diary for every time I was pregnant because I just have know clue this time around if I’ve had a mmc…..
Between 25y to 35y I had 5 mc and then at 36y a successful pregnancy. May this year I had a chemical and at the moment I’m 9w5d.
I had good hcg between 7-8 weeks and have been counting down to my first scan tomorrow.
With my successful pregnancy I was convinced I would mc and pushed out my first scan to 10wks like I have done again this time.
My titties have been the only way I have been able to tell I’m still pregnant, and over the last few days the tenderness has subsided. I’m also tired but can’t tell if that’s a thing as I have a toddler.
This week I had a migraine(I get about 6/yr) and one evening of lower back pain where I couldn’t get comfortable until I went to bed - which is annoying as I have a bung back sometimes 😣
I’m starting to feel like this is what one of my mc was like 😖
I don’t know why I’m posting… I’m just lost in my head and getting really nervous about tomorrow.
Anyone had a similar experience? Or maybe some reassurance? It would be so much appreciated ❤️
r/CautiousBB • u/koRn_xxx • 3h ago
There’s a very distinct smell of period blood that’s sat for a bit. Like a pad after using overnight or changing it after it’s sat for the longest length it can. It’s just an extra metallic-y smell. My discharge smells exactly like that right now. I’m taking vaginal progesterone & I’ve read it can have a smell but I’ve seen multiple people describe it as a hamster cage smell. That’s not what this is, it smells like blood & overall a strong metallic smell. I’m 5w6d today & with a history of loss even the smell of blood is making me freak out I guess. No bleeding or spotting. No concerning cramping. Has anyone had this ?
r/CautiousBB • u/Proper_Star_4566 • 4h ago
Hi all,
I am currently having weekly ultrasounds for a 1 week discrepancy in dates and baby is growing well since the first scan, measuring had a scan last week that saw a baby growing well at 6.6mm (6w4d) and having a heartbeat of 115bpm.
No one said anything to me and it wasn’t in the ultrasound report at all, but looking at the photos, there is a large mass in the gestational sac! It looks bigger than the baby. From what I can gather, the internet seems to think it’s a chorionic bump.
My question is, has anyone had one of these before? Was their doctor concerned? I read about increased risk of chromosome issues and miscarriage, which has now added to my concern about measuring 1 week behind.
why on earth did the ultrasound tech not report this? It’s so obviously in there on the pictures.
Thanks in advance. I am stressing out now even more than I was
r/CautiousBB • u/Ill_Badger_7229 • 5h ago
Has anybody ever had success stories with low beta ? I am going through IVF. I took a blood test yesterday and beta was only 20.7.
Last pregnancy was chemical with similar. I’m expecting it to be chemical again, but I feel sad as it’s been a hard road. I just wanted to know if there are stories out there of positives.
r/CautiousBB • u/carbsandkaraoke • 6h ago
Supposed to be 7 weeks pregnant today - LMP was August 29, did not diligently track ovulation but typical cycle is 28-30 days.
Found out I was pregnant at 3wks 5 days, first pregnancy
Yesterday went to hospital for peace of mind as I had two days of light spotting with cramping more on my left side. Hcg rose from 6000-9000 in 3 days.
Ultrasound(abdominal and transvaginal) showed an empty gestational sac in the uterus measuring 12mm or equivalent to approx. 5 weeks gestation. Also showed a small subchorionic hematoma.
Is there any chance this isn’t a blighted ovum?! I don’t understand how I could possibly be 5 weeks.
The NP didnt seem to even know what that was and said this was normal for 5 weeks. However I don’t believe I could be 5 weeks. I think I’ll be following up with a repeat ultrasound in 1-2 weeks and mostly mentally preparing for a loss. Any one have any similar experiences? Any positive?
Also does this mostly rule out any possibility of ectopic? My left ovary wasn’t properly visualized in the imaging.
r/CautiousBB • u/thankyounow • 6h ago
I just noticed quite a bit of stretchy, mucus like discharge when I wiped. It was mostly clear with a very faint yellow tint and had a stringy, stretchy consistency.
I remember experiencing something similar during my last missed miscarriage, around the time my baby’s heartbeat stopped. Now I’m feeling really anxious that this discharge could be a sign that something is wrong with my current pregnancy.
I’m paranoid it’s a mucus plug and sign of a miscarriage?
Has anyone experienced this type of discharge in early pregnancy? Is it normal, or could it indicate a problem?
r/CautiousBB • u/Emmyj123 • 6h ago
I ovulated on the 26th of September so I am 21 days post ovulation. I took my first HCG blood test on Monday at was 72, Thursday I was at 100 and today 123
My OBGYN shared they look for 49%+ so I’m trending much more slowly but still rising. I’m aware of the warning symptoms to look out for but haven’t experienced any yet.
Looking for positive stories/outcomes and community but also realism.
r/CautiousBB • u/Laniebug929 • 11h ago
Hi everyone. I’m hoping for maybe a bit of reassurance here. I am almost 6 weeks pregnant after a chemical pregnancy last month. I also have a 16 month old son.
I went today for an early ultrasound at a boutique. Against my better judgment, I opted to do this because my doctor can’t get me in before 8w and 4d, and I don’t want to wait that long with my history. We did this with my son at 6 weeks and his HR was 111.
My HCG is looking great, it was 5,196 at 5w and 3d and then was 9,248 at 5w and 4d.
Today when we went in for the ultrasound, I thought I was 6 weeks but I was measuring 5 + 5. She immediately located the heartbeat and I cried tears of joy. Then, she measured it twice and said it was 97 bpm. She put her hand on my knee and told me it’s low but that it could have just started beating. She acted worried when I asked if she’s concerned. My husband said she definitely said it very somber and serious. I didn’t like it.
I am terrified. I don’t get in to my next appointment for a couple of weeks, and I don’t know how to feel. This is our little rainbow whom I love so much already. Seeing that flicker was the most beautiful thing.
My reason for typing this….should I be guarding my heart? Is this potentially normal? Any and all success stories would be absolutely welcome. I just want to know if I need to brace for the worst or if I can celebrate this milestone.
r/CautiousBB • u/Pleasant_Ad1130 • 7h ago
I had an early pregnancy loss at around 5 weeks (chemical pregnancy) on September 23, with bleeding for about 3–4 days. My hCG was confirmed through a blood test to have returned to negative that same day.
About 3 weeks later (2 days ago), I had a faint positive pregnancy test at the ER. My home pregnancy tests have been negative so far (I’ve only taken two), so I’m feeling confused and cautiously hopeful. My doctor thinks it could be a new, very early pregnancy, but I’m still waiting for more clarity.
I haven’t had a period since the loss, so I’m also unsure exactly when I might have ovulated. I know it’s possible to ovulate before your first period after a miscarriage, but I didn’t expect to be in this situation so soon.
Has anyone experienced a faint positive just a few weeks after a chemical pregnancy, especially after hCG had already returned to negative? Did it turn out to be a new pregnancy? How did things progress, and how long did it take for your home tests to become positive?
I’d really appreciate hearing your experiences, especially from anyone who has been through something similar. Thank you! ❤️
r/CautiousBB • u/Dapper-Car-2168 • 8h ago
Hey yall. Did any of u have cramping on one side. I am worried it can be an ectopic, or am I just overthinking?. I remember with my first kid, I had like a pulling feeling all the time on my left side, but not a cramp.
r/CautiousBB • u/Lil4eyedlati • 13h ago
I really wanted to believe this was the one but I think this will lead to another miscarriage. I am 6w + 2days today.
At 5w+1d HCG was 687
At 5w+6d HCG was 2,294
At 6w+2d HCG is 2,820
r/CautiousBB • u/Fit-Huckleberry9965 • 16h ago
Hi All I’m 4w5d today, I’ve been experiencing cramping since i’ve known i was pregnant. it’s not intense per-say just like you would get right before your period. I only got one hcg draw at 4w2d which was 12 DPO for me , it was 119. I have no bleeding at all. i’m not really experiencing any other symptoms except for breast tenderness. No nausea really. In wondering if this is normal or if i should be worried !? I won’t see a doctor for even a confirmatory ultrasound for like 2 more weeks so I’m just so stressed. This is my first pregnancy i have no idea what to expect. If anyone has any advice for me I would be so thankful!
r/CautiousBB • u/horrorshowbaby • 10h ago
r/CautiousBB • u/AntiqueCandy01 • 18h ago
Hi all,
Does anyone know (roughly) what their HCG levels were when they started getting symptoms (e.g. fatigue, sore boobs, nausea)? I'm feeling literally nothing :/
(probably overworrying, but had three prior losses and feeling nothing worries me)
TIA x
r/CautiousBB • u/FloorAnxious07 • 11h ago
I got my hcg drawn at 4 weeks 0 days and it came back as 31. And my progesterone is 19.4. Should I be preparing for another chemical? I’m so bummed
r/CautiousBB • u/WifeyWoller • 12h ago
I'm guarding my heart. I've had two chemicals this year and then just tested positive again.
I had a VVF positive on 11 DPO. I had tons of cramping on 10 DPO so I'm assuming that is the day I implanted. I'm quite sure of dating due to positive OPK as well as a start ride in BBT. Ovulated on CD 11 (normal for me) and my cycles are typically 24-25 days in length. I do have DOR and only have 1 fallopian tube. I did just have an HSG in preparation for pre-conception IVF testing.
Anyway:
CD 11: VVF positive
CD 12: VF positive but line progressed
CD 13: F positive but progressing. Beta HCG 12.63, progesterone only 7. At this point I assumed a chemical again.
CD 14. Still positive but no significant progression on UPT.
CD 15. Very obvious positive (was not expecting this). Went in for repeat beta and it was 43.68. I did not have my progesterone redrawn at this time, but I did start supplementing with PIO and will do vaginal suppositories at night.
What. The. Heck. I was all prepared for a non-progressing HCG and then this tripled HCG in almost exactly 48 hours threw me for a loop. I'm still very guarded as I know low HCG and progesterone, even though progressing, can still often end in chemical or otherwise earlier miscarriage (blighted ovum). I also worry about ectopic as I only have one remaining tube.
Has anyone had successful pregnancies with these kinds of numbers?
r/CautiousBB • u/Roundofthefloors • 12h ago
Hi I'm, 37F, currently 5 weeks and 3 days pregnant. Yesterday I started to have brown blood when I wiped while going to the toilet. I also had a day of bleeding about 10 days ago which I thought was the first day of my period, but it stopped and I had 2 positive urine hcg tests during the week. The new brown bleeding has carried on today but not got heavier. I've had a previous miscarriage at 7 weeks and an early loss at 5-6 weeks both in the last 7 months. I feel like it's just going to be another loss but I've read that I would be eligible for progesterone and should contact my EPU in the morning. Has anyone got any experience of this, did it help at all? Thanks for any advice. I feel like maybe I'm clutching at straws and just desperate for it not to be a 3rd miscarriage in 7 months but any insight would be really appreciated!
r/CautiousBB • u/Busybumblebee848924 • 13h ago
Hi! My initial Beta was 11.53 and two days later increased to 62.37. Just did a 3rd beta today and it’s 123.1. Should I be concerned that it quadrupled from the first to second and then barely doubled between 2nd and third? I have had several losses before this and although the doc says it’s fine as long as it’s doubling I’m worried
r/CautiousBB • u/moonlightxo29 • 13h ago
I just saw my ultrasound report, and it said there was no fetal pole yet. Has anyone had an ultrasound in early 5 week with no fetal pole and still gone on to have a healthy pregnancy? I had went to the ER to rule out an ectopic due to right sided pain.
This is what my report says : “ There is a intrauterine gestational sac with a questionable low sac. Mean sac diameter corresponds to 5 weeks 2 days.
No subchorionic hemorrhage identified. The left ovary measures 2.7 x 1.5 x 1.4 cm. Doppler flow identified in the left ovary. The right ovary measures 2.5 x 2.2 x 3.5 cm. There is a 1.4 x 2.3 x 2.0 cm lesion within the right ovary suggestive of a corpus luteal cyst. Doppler flow identified in the right ovary. Trace pelvic free fluid.
IMPRESSION: Suspected intrauterine gestational sac with question of a yolk sac. No fetal pole. No subchorionic hemorrhage. Left adnexal lesion likely representing a corpus luteal cyst. Trace pelvic free fluid. Differential diagnosis includes early IUP, spontaneous abortion and ectopic pregnancy. Correlation with serial beta hCG and follow-up ultrasound recommended.”
r/CautiousBB • u/atermelon_90 • 14h ago
Hi all. A couple of days ago I got a very positive test. I am 7 months postpartum so havent gotten my period back and have no clue how far along I am. I am not upset about being pregnant so soon, before my last son I went through 6 years of secondary infertility and 3 losses spread throughout my live children. My ob gave me an hcg reading for peace of mind and it was 70,000 ! When I went back to see if it doubled it only rose to 73,000. Should I be concerned about it moving so little ? I know it slows down as it gets higher and I've never had an initial hcg be so high so I dont know if I should be in panic mode or not.
r/CautiousBB • u/StrengthAcrobatic618 • 18h ago
I had a strong beta of 201 at 8dp6dt (13 dpo), so was feeling quite good.
But two days later it didn’t quite double and this is stressing me out immensely.
8 dpt - 201
10 dpt - 394
A doubling time of 49.4h, which is only slightly above the 48h.
BUT I took the last test 2,5 h later, so I guess I should count it as 53h doubling time.
My first pregnancy had much lower (but normal) betas but they had a 33h doubling time.
I’ll ask for one more beta on Monday.
Anyone have experiences with similar doubling times?