My husband and I are pretty comfortable talking about almost anything. We can spend hours discussing finances, savings, or random life stuff, but when it comes to talking about what we like in bed, suddenly neither of us knows what to say lol.

I recently tried bringing up the idea of trying something new together, and he just laughed nervously and said he was fine with whatever I wanted. Then we somehow ended up talking about dinner instead 😂

We have a good relationship and our sex life is fine, so it's not like there's a major issue. I just wish we could talk about this stuff without making it awkward. For those of you who used to struggle with this, what helped you get more comfortable talking about your preferences without making it a whole serious conversation?

Hello! I (F23) love masturbating, but I feel like I cum to fast. I enjoy stroking myself, but after 4-5 minutes I climax and I'm done. And the climax is not always that good...

When I watch female masturbating online, they can keep stroking for dozen of minutes and have massive orgasms. I would love to increase the length of my masturbation sessions.

Do you have any recommendations?

28f

Still a virgin but i've been seeing a guy for the past few weeks and about a week ago we did some sexual stuff at my place.

He is very nice and patient with me, but I felt like my performance was lackluster all around.

I tried to deep throat him and embarrass myself with gagging.

I couldn't even dry hump him right.

He mostly did all the work and I felt bad.

I never outright told him i was virgin but I did tell him I was inexperienced.

I didn't even get wet that much 😭

We had to use lube for him to insert his fingers in me, and even then it was too much for me.

He did oral sex on me and i did enjoy it, it was just an overwhelming sensation unfortunately.

I just feel like eventually he's going to lose patience with me.

So how long does it take for someone whose been a virgin for damn near 3 decades to be good at sex?

He's also very very experience compare to me, so i know he's doing it correctly and i'm failing.

My overthinking brain says because I didn't have sex young and my frontal lobe is fully developed, i'll never be good at it, it's too late for me, and that i'm too old.

I've been really irritated lately with the lack of representation depicted in porn, despite the fact that there is probably more porn out there than ever before. I tried watching mainstream porn when I was a teenager and was generally put off by the misogyny and performative spectacle of it all. It was all just so same-y, the dude just jackhammered some pristine hairless wailing woman with his massive dick until someone came. It all felt fake and crude and cringe-y. Sure, I get that gets most people off and its only for entertainment mostly, but I've never found anything particularly suited to my own unique interests.

I mostly read erotica (fanfiction) because I can get very picky with the content filtering of it, and the writing style is a lot more erotically vs pornographically focused. But sometimes I want something visual. I am bi, but a lot of porn out there does not seem to be made with anyone else in mind than cishet men... I've bought subscriptions to erikalust, a content creator couple, and filthy figments to try and bring some visual and creative diversity in, and while those were all lovely exceptions to the rule, their catalog is limited, and does not seem as extensive as sites like pornhub or something. There's only so many times I can jerk it to the same video before it becomes easier to just use my imagination.

I've recently taken to just making the content I want to see in the world by writing and drawing some characters that are representative of what I find arousing, but I'm sick of doing everything myself! Its even hard for me to find reference images to draw the sort of stuff I want to see of the male body type I'm attracted to. I like very tall lanky alternative (tattoos, piercings, mohawks, looks like a strong breeze would knock them over, etc.) men but even on the subreddits dedicated to "alt porn" its always just focused on women, sorry, ~goth girls~ What if I want to objectify an inked up man!?!!

The main things that I want to see change:
-skinny lanky guys
-alternative men
-seeing a dudes face while people are boning, not just a close up of the fucking
-literally any normal amount of body hair on women
-different body types for women (I'm talking fat girls and muscled girls and older women whose boobs sag!)
-Gender minorities that are not fetishized (idk if I've seen any trans or non-binary representation where their marginalized identity was not overtly fetishized outside of filthy figments comics which are made by a lot of GNC artists)

It feels frustrating that there is diverse content for fetishes as specific as inflation or JOI or furries or hypnosis or feminization out there with LIBRARIES worth of media but a girl with unsymmetrical labia? Nearly impossible to find. It just feels so monotonous and lame at this point. I know culturally we're still getting over the whole "women can be interested and enjoy erotica" point but cmon now. romantasy is one of the best selling fiction genres annually. Can we at least consider editing the script on these videos?

TL;DR there should be more diverse porn out there that caters to me and my interests, specifically.

we finally had a chance home alone to actually love each other properly after months, and it was great! i love that he is very caring and makes sure i give full consent and am ready for everything :)

Me and my roommate have been living together for almost 3 years now and tbh it's been so much fun. We're both girls, she's bi and somewhere along the way things got a little more than friendly lol. We were never in a relationship or anything but sometimes we'd hook up when we were both in the mood. It was always super casual, no feelings or expectations and somehow it never made things awkward between us.

She's moving out next month and idk why I'm getting so emotional about it... We've had so many good memories together and I kinda wanted to give her something personal to remember our time together. I was thinking about giving her my WhisperVibe and my Nipple clips since we've used them on each other before lol but now I'm wondering if that's just a really weird goodbye gift??

Sometimes I feel like everyone else knows exactly what they like and what works for them, and I'm just here figuring things out as I go lol.

I've had moments where something felt good, but when it comes to explaining what I actually want, I honestly have no idea how to put it into words. And sometimes I just go along with things instead of speaking up because I don't wanna make the moment awkward.

I know it's probably something that gets easier with time, but does anyone else feel this way? How did you get more comfortable exploring what you like and actually telling your partner?

So first of all I'm an adult so I hope no minors interact with my post. I've been looking and exploring personal massagers for a while. Currently I have a Qibox lipstick discrete one and was looking for a suction massager as well.

So if somebody can answer me how is the one I've mentioned in the title? for more context it's the rose shape one (have heard about it a lot too) and it's currently available on instant delivery apps I guess but I really wanted to do my research before investing.

So please if anybody can answer they're welcome. 🤗🥹

i feel like a lot of JOI audios go for that super commanding voice lol. nothing wrong with that, but sometimes i wonder if a calmer, more natural voice would actually work better.anyone here into the softer kind? curious what you think.

Hi, i'm F(24) and always have problem with my sexuality (because of past trauma) and my boyfriend bought me a sextoy for me to take back my sexuality.

We have sex but not often and he really doesn't shame or pressure me to do it. He encourage me to explore it with smut in books and asked me if a sextoy would help me and at the time i said yes and i believe it but i'm at loss..i tried it but it feels weird and there's a LOT of settings and i feel bad..it's like he offered me a sweet opportunity and i waste it.

The funny thing is that the toy has the same name as me and i kinda like it

I can share the link if it's relevent just tell me

I 21F have grown up syntribating before i even knew what it was (crossing ur legs until climax) this has worked for me great until i started getting in relationships and couldn’t even finish with my partners. I had tried using my hand before it just never seemed to work. After a lot of research i decided to take a break from syntribation and try using my hand. About i week ago i tried it, i started off crossing my legs a bit and then when i felt turned on enough i switched to my hand. This worked as i started to feel close, still it didn’t feel half as good as syntribation and it felt a bit different than syntribation as i was getting close because usually i just finish and that’s that but this felt like finishing was taking longer and like i kinda had to push it out? then out of nowhere that feeling went away and i started feeling nauseous and exactly how i feel post orgasm. The weird part is that i didn’t feel the orgasm part but i think i came? So i tried it again a couple days later and same thing happened. I’m lost idk what to do i want this so bad.

I didn't know what the appropriate flair would be for this. Sorry, lol.

I scrolled on tiktok and saw a video captioned "went on a dream date today", and it was a woman in the woods with her bf with a ghost face mask on. He was chasing her around. My bf and I were thinking about doing this recently!! I was thinking we were weird, but I guess not! Even the women in the comments were saying how badly they wanted to do it. 🤣🤣

Have any of you guys done this before? And what is this fetish called? I know I have a mask kink, but I'm talking about the chasing thing.

Update: My bf was asking me a bunch of questions on why I find masks sexy, which ones, what clothes, etc. 👀 I guess I'm in for a wild ride, y'all!! 😭😭❤️

I’m 33 and had an emergency hysterectomy in 2023. I still have my ovaries, but my cervix was removed, so I have a vaginal cuff. I also have endometriosis and deal with chronic pelvic pain.
I’m also a virgin, which makes my situation a little more complicated.
It’s not because I’m waiting until marriage. I’ve just never met someone I felt comfortable enough with or had that kind of emotional connection with. I don’t want my first time to be with just anyone.
I’m hoping to start dating soon, and if I meet the right person, I really do want to experience intimacy. But I’m nervous. I’ve never had sex, and now I’m wondering how having a vaginal cuff and endometriosis might affect things. I’m scared it could be painful or that something could go wrong. I know I’ll need someone who’s patient and willing to take things slowly.
I’m also not sure how to explain all of this to a man without scaring him off. How do you casually tell someone you’re a virgin, you’ve had a hysterectomy, and sex might be painful? 😅 I don’t want to make it into this huge thing, but I also don’t want to pretend my circumstances are different than they are.
And then there’s the infertility part. Having my hysterectomy and losing the ability to carry my own children has been absolutely devastating. It’s something I’m still grieving, and I’m terrified of having to tell someone I’m dating that I won’t be able to give him biological children together in the traditional sense. I know having children is a dealbreaker for some men, and I completely understand that, but the thought of someone walking away because of something I never chose really hurts.
I want to be upfront about it because I don’t want to waste anyone’s time, including my own. But I also don’t feel like I should have to tell someone my entire medical history before they’ve even gotten to know me.
I guess I’m wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation. What was sex like after your hysterectomy, especially if you have endometriosis or a vaginal cuff? How did you explain everything to your partner? And for those who were single when they had their hysterectomy, how did you navigate dating and telling someone you couldn’t have children?
I want to believe I can still have a normal relationship, fall in love, and have a fulfilling sex life. I’m just scared that everything I’ve been through is going to make finding that harder than it already is.
Any advice or personal experiences would mean a lot. ❤️

Hi! I was talking about smut with my bf and realized we have different attitudes to it. I treat it like a low effort thing and am too lazy to read a full book. I’ve read mostly blogposts (I love girlonthenet!!) with the explicit intention of getting horny and getting off relatively quickly. I get annoyed with flowery language.

He enjoys the world building and gets aroused but he doesn’t get off to it, it’s like a tease. On the whole he enjoys written smut a LOT more than I do.

Do you ladies enjoy just reading without any stimulation? Or do you get off while reading?

I grew up very religious woman and never even touched my self until 2 years ago when my sex drive got to be alot so maybe 1 or a few times I month I have to help myself out. I am interested in dating men and I feel like such a fake adult. I get anxiety thinking of any physical intimacy and I used to disassociate on dates completely until recently. I don't feel I know alot about my intimate parts because I ignored them for so long. How do I prepare to date and possibly have my first time? It is something I am open to in theory but nervous about the logistics, or "if I'm normal down there" etc. ..I have been seeing an OBGYN as regularly as I should even though I hadn't been sexually active.

Hello! idk if this is the right place I should ask this so sorry in advance. Im 19 and recently when I try to finish with my partner it hasn’t been happening. I have sexual trauma so alot of the time I let my partner finish first and then I go second (idk why but me finishing first reminds me of my past). With that being said, I also typically finish myself while I have my partner help in other ways (fingering, dirty talking, teasing, etc), I prefer it this way idk why. Normally, me finishing comes by pretty quickly. Theres always forplay and I do genuinely enjoy the intimacy, so I’m not understanding why I’m having a hard time? It will be there for a second and then go away randomly. I’m not rlly distracted, I NEVER masterbait unless I’m with my partner (idk im not rlly in a sexual mood outside of being around him), and I’m not on any medication other than birth control. Has anyone else had this problem before??

Have any of you had a mfm?

im a woman and i've always been wanting to have an mfm or even two boyfriends. I like the idea of being so good that I can please 2 men at once while they praise and worship me. I've gotten close to having a mfm, but it doesn't work out because of trave/they back out/they make me feel like a whore (in a degrading way. big praise kink here lol.) I live in a somewhat small town and there arent many bisexual men here. I typically go to the town 40 mins away whenever I try to make it happen since I don't wanna end up being posted on the city group gossip Facebook.

im looking on advice advice but it's also nice to just share one of my biggest fantasies.

I'm maxed out around 3

Sharing a new to me masturbation technique that has been sex life-changing from of, all things, a recently-published romance novel, Devil by Sierra Simone.

While it may sounds kinda silly and not a little like remedial female self-pleasure, HEAR ME OUT IT WORKS:

Straddling on the bed a rolled up towel placed on top of a base of additional linens to rub, hump, and grind on. In the book, the base is three folded towels stacked on top of one another. In my “for science” trials, used a folded up light comforter as the base because I am not made of towels.

Some may say that this is basically the same as using a pillow, side of the bed, etc. And possibly for some women that’s true! Reason I am bothering to post is that those other methods have NEVER worked for me!

What’s more, I’ve actually been struggling for years and years with being unable to replicate the intensity of pleasure I could sometimes achieve with a partner on my own. We’re talking Betty Dodson Method and OMGYES memberships, Hitachi and Lelo purchases, reputable books with academic sources like Come As You by Emily Nagoski and Becoming Cliterate by Laurie Mintz, and countless online disreputable sources. Going through endless cycles of “As an adult woman, I HAVE to learn my body and figure this out,” and only then to get so literally frustrated and disappointed that the effort started to take away from the satisfaction that I could obtain.

While this method not only replicates what I had been aiming for, since starting to use it regularly I have gone from occasionally being able to orgasm with a partner to consistently able to orgasm AT LEAST twice during partnered sex. All thanks to a romance novel…and…a fucking (lol) towel!

If any of this matches your own struggles, consider giving it a try!

Wasn’t sure where else to turn because I have no friends to brag about this too 🙃. I was feeling particularly horny this morning and my man had just taken a shower and smelled sinful. He made my cum 10 different times and it was INTENSE. The dirty talk in my ear, he had me call him “sir” for the first time… which was 🥵. And he’s started doing this thing where he kisses my neck and counts softly in my ear for each kiss he gives me and yall it’s like immediate I wanna jump his bones. Anywho… just wanted to brag to someone that I got turned into a slobbering buzzing mess over my lunch break today

Would love to get some advice and ideas that other women have tried to make this feeling keep going in our next encounter too

Hi, so I had my first time yesterday and I wanted to share my experience and ask for advice.

So I did it with someone who's... well, a situationship. Let's call them R.

R barely tried to prep me and they were kinda rough despite me telling them multiple times to be gentle with their fingers. R was surprised when their thing didn't go in, which, well, I was dry as hell so why would it? So I told them that. Their response was giving me 10 seconds of oral and then trying again. Eventually it went in and yeah it hurt, but not insanely hurt. Just like zapping your hand with a power outlet briefly. That's the best I can describe it.

R had been wanting to do it for a very long time so I thought that situation was as special to them as it was for me. But by the end of it they didn't even finish themselves because R "got tired", which made me cry thinking I wasn't good enough. Whatever... At least R wore a condom and I'm on BC.

The experience, which I thought would feel way more different, was disappointinly underwhelming. I didn't even notice the entire thing was in (they're average, like 14-15) until they told me. The weird thing is that I didn't feel it. Truly it was as if nothing was inside. No pleasure when they thrust in, just nothing. I don't know what's going on with my body. Is it because I wasn't 100% in the mood nor wet?

I bled. A little. Which is fine because I expected it, but today I checked and I was cramping and a bunch more blood came out. Dark red so kinda old blood. My perineum burns a little. But other than that inside my vag it doesn't hurt so that's good. Though I did wake up with a bit of pelvis pain which is gone by now. Emotionally, I still feel bad about what happened. It sucks. R's review of it at the end when I asked multiple times for them to give me a proper reply as " it could have been better."

I don't know if I have some sort of condition or why I didn't feel anything. I wanted to. Was it the lack of foreplay? Or is there something else going on? Does anyone know? I'm worried because I want to do it again in the future but I don't want every time to feel the same.

Soy mujer y cuando llego al orgasmo (muy rápido como en 1 minuto) se me pone el clitoris muy sensible y no puedo seguir porque me molesta, y dejo de sentir dentro de la vagina, no sé si hay alguien que le pase igual pero me gustaría seguir y no puedo, me gustaría durar mas, me siento insuficiente porque no le voy a gustar a ningún hombre durando tan poco