Just a note that this is not a great irritation! Though maybe it does poke the tender spot that is the reality of the heirarchy in their relationship, and how he struggles to sit with her discomfort and allow her to handle her feelings herself.

He was having fun playing with his facial hair for the first time in his life since he historically hasn't been able to grow a great beard. He was having fun with it and looked quite dashing with a bit of scruff! I think he also enjoyed how much I liked it. Meta came he from a trip and immediately complained that his face was scratchy and asked him to shave, so of course he did. I get it, he didn't really have any skin in the game. He could take it or leave it and was just having fun. I was just a bit put out because I really loved the new look!

This is definitely on the more shallow end of the Poly Problems spectrum lol, it happened a couple months ago and I just came across a photo from that time which made me think to make the post. I felt like a total nudge for even having the feeling in the first place, I'd never tell him I had it!

What silly little things like this do you keep to yourself?

Hello. Just a honest question and if it comes off ignorantly I do apologize. I was never allowed to ask questions like these in my now defunct marriage without conflict but is it common for polyamorous relationship anarchists to get married? Isn't marriage in direct conflict with the idea that all relationships are equal and no one is more important than the other? Beyond legal reasons,financial reasons,NOK hospital decisions and taxes, what would compel a relationship anarchist to get married?

Honestly not trying to say that people in that dynamic should or shouldn't get married, im just trying to understand what went so terribly wrong in my marriage beyond the betrayal and infidelity. Thank you guys so much for helping me heal. ❤️

Julie

We’ve been together for 6 months. He was already poly when we got together, I’ve been discovering myself along the way.

After a tough period of work and life stresses for him, he mentions a few weeks ago that he was keen to start dating again. At first I was anxious and unsure about this shift - even though I’ve known from the start that this was going to happen eventually. We had loads of really good chats about it and we’re both on the same page and both feeling secure about our own relationship and about dating others.
He’s on a date tonight and I took the time to stay at a friends place for a catch up and hangout just incase my mind started to doubt or spiral. I am actually so surprised I don’t feel any extent of the jealously or panic I thought I would. I feel excited for him and I’m looking forward to hearing about how his date has gone tomorrow!

I’m so surprised at how far I’ve come in the last few months. A lot of internal reflections, my own research, honest and transparent discussions and a partner who’s been patient and understanding while also providing insight has been the perfect combination for me.

Just felt necessary to post something positive because I feel like when I was reading Reddit posts a few months ago, everything seemed negative and against poly - even in this pages!

First some background information; my partner and I are going on 3 years. This is my first polyamorous relationship, he has been exploring this lifestyle since he was in his 20s. I recently moved cities for him and I’m still working on building a foundation down here. I’ve never been ok with my partners keeping friendships with their exes. I’ll never tell a man what he can or can’t do, but I always express my discomfort at the least. We have already had at least 3 conversations about this topic.

Now the situation: recently my partner, we’ll call him B, got really into kickboxing and while at the kickboxing gym, he ran into one of his exes, N. B says he never had a serious relationship with N, however they used to live together and they have a shared traumatic experience, which is what rekindled their friendship. At the time of him rekindling his friendship with N, I was not aware of any sexual or romantic history and was told they were simply platonic friends and was fine with that. Last week after they went to the kickboxing gym, they were out together until 1am, which when confronted about, he explained the past relationship and that he had proposed rekindling their past relationship. At this time, they are not seeing each other but agreed to continue rebuilding their friendship to see if a rekindling is appropriate. Also to do this, he is now going to also be teaching her how to play drums. I did express that he will need to go to her house to do so as I don’t want to feel uncomfortable in the home I pay for, but I don’t feel I have the opportunity to express my feelings now that he has already expressed interest being close to her. I feel like now that he expressed his feelings and plans to spend time with her, if I say in uncomfortable and he breaks that connection it will seem like I’m a crazy, jealous person. This wouldn’t be an issue if I were well established in the area but right now all my connections are through him and would leave me in an awkward position in his groups. And the other option is if I told him and he continued his connection I would have to reckon with having a partner that doesn’t respect my feelings. All I feel like I can do is just get my affairs in order in case this doesn’t work out but I could really use some advice in the meantime.

Hi all,

EDIT: I realise the details I included about Ben and Georgia not sharing rooms anymore + them not spending any time together came of as judgy. It's definitely not my business, I wanted to supply further context for my concerns, but have realised that particular info was unnecessary. My concern is telling one partner that you'd choose them, while the other partner doesn't know this. I would want to know this information, but this is why I asked the question, because maybe it doesn't matter/isn't the norm in poly relationships.

It's as the title says. I would appreciate some insight as I've only recently started becoming curious about polyamory and am not sure whether this is as red-flaggy as I think it is.

names have been changed for privacy

My best friend Stella (F, 30) has been dating Ben (M, 38) for about 4 months. Three months into the relationship, Ben proposed to Stella and she accepted. The problem is, Ben is already married to Georgia (F, 36) and has been for 15 years. Ben and Stella plan to get married overseas where they think it's legal (it isn't). After this, the three of them plan to move in together.

Anyway, that's actually not the main issue. Stella told me the other day that she had been feeling a bit insecure about her relationship as Ben and Georgia have obviously been together for a long time. Stella expressed her concerns to Ben - and Ben assured Stella that if it came to it, he would choose her. Stella told me that this made her feel reassured, however this left a very bad taste in my mouth. This is on the background of Ben and Georgia establishing different bedrooms and spending less time together since Ben and Stella started dating.

My main concern here is based on my assumption that in poly relationships there would be communication between Ben and Georgia about Ben's feelings towards Stella. I feel unsettled by this information being kept from Georgia, particularly as it gives the impression that her marriage is in jeopardy and she doesn't know a thing about it. It feels deceitful and honestly, a bit morally bankrupt.

As I said above, I'm new here, so would appreciate the perspective of the community before sharing any concerns with Stella.

Thank you!

I’ve been poly for a few years now and couldn’t be happier. I feel like I have arrived and I’m thriving and my life is just where it’s supposed to be.

Unfortunately the journey has resulted in me losing more than a few friends. Most of the friends I made were during a hetero-monogamous marriage. Some knew I am bi but I guess it didn’t count because I was monogamously married to a man at the time? To them, being with other people of any gender was a part of the “wild oats” chapter of my past that we only talk about once a year while drunk on New Year’s Eve. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I thought they were all so liberal and open minded. When I got divorced I lost some of them. The divorce had nothing to do with polyamory. He was abusive and that’s a different post, but apparently divorce for any reason makes people uncomfortable. They didn’t SEE the reason and so they don’t think I tried hard enough or something. I was with him for 20 years people, c’mon! Ok, I digress.

Anyway, I was always philosophically polyamorous. We didn’t have the word for it back then, but once I was no longer in a monogamous relationship, I went back to my default settings 🤓 and started practicing polyamory.

I was surprised how uncomfortable it made many of them feel. One tries but struggles. Another just doesn’t want to talk about any of my partners. Another just flat out admitted that none of my relationships can possibly be serious and thinks the whole thing is ridiculous. That one really fucking hurt. Especially since I’m getting remarried.

These were my closest friends and now interactions have become stilted. I have a fiancé now and I’m so excited to marry him but my wedding guest list keeps shrinking.

I want friends that I can gush to about my latest crushes. I want friends I can talk to about my hilarious metamour. I want friends that will hold me as I sob through a breakup and don’t dismiss it because I “still have X person and what’s the big deal.”

I want friends who can come over for game nights and not balk when my fiance cuddles on the couch with this girlfriend or I bring a date to my own game night.

And yes I have tried finding friends on the apps but I have been unsuccessful thus far. Poly is still a small pool and most poly people I meet want to date me. That is NOT a statement about how awesome I am. Just the facts. But I don’t want to play board games with a bunch of exes. I know some people can make that transition from dating people to just friends but I don’t. The FWB scene is not for me.

And so here I am. A nerd in NJ kinda lonely for friends who get it. Want to come to my wedding lol?

Hi! I would like to know what made you realize/confirm you are polyamorous/practice polyamory. I would like to read your (detailed) experiences so I can have more material to analyze my own realizations. I'm am referring to your 'aha-erlebnis', shower thoughts, and moments of realization when reading/watching/talking/reflecting ...

One of mine was after I had a conversation about platonic friendships. The topic was 'best friends', so I told them I didn't really understand the need to categorize friends since we all are different people and we all have a different kind of relationship with each other. And that If I think of someone as a friend (and it's verbally confirmed), I put more effort in the relationship (paraphrasing).

She thanked me (after hearing the 'effort-part') and I replied with "It's nothing personal, that's how I treat my friends".

Come to today and after reading some threads, taking a long shower, and writing this post, I realize that's why I find myself to be polyamorous. I want to give all the people I love my highest possible healthy effort ("all"). And for me that's only possible in a romantic relationship.

Thank you all for sharing, in advance.

PS: Long time lurker. I've always loved how you can read the reflection of this community in it's written communication. 🥰

​

My girlfriend and np Magnolia (early 30s, nb trans woman) and my boyfriend Stumpy (mid 30s, nonbinary) get along really well. For instance, Stumpy recently stayed up until midnight in their time zone to wish Magnolia a happy birthday at exactly the right time. Early in our relationship, Stumpy gave me a pendant on a cord, which you had to fasten by tying a knot.

Well I did my best to tie it but my best was knot very good. It fell off two or three times, including once outside. I almost walked off before noticing and left it there.

I told Magnolia about the issue I was having and she tied it for me. I wore it for months and the knot stayed. I've since retired it due to wanting a change in my aesthetic but I keep it close because it's become a beloved symbol for me of how supportive Magnolia has always been of my relationship with Stumpy and the genuine respect and affection my partners have for each other.

Pic of the pendant below

https://imgur.com/a/0sHxhvr

It seems there is an incompatibility in my needs and the time my partner can give.

It’s been since April that my partner has started pursuing a new career. I knew that it would mean a reduction in time. It’s caused some friction and sad feelings for me. We’ve had conversations and tried to make a plan but it’s not going well. They have a nesting partner and a child as well as a new career and the education they are pursuing while holding their old job to continue to support themselves. I just don’t think I can be ok with what feels like leftovers. I’m understanding of their life situation. I’ve asked for what I need and they just aren’t capable of meeting me there.

I’ve tried to reason with myself that it’s a season in life but I think I’d rather be alone than lonely in my relationship.

Why is my solution to end it when I’m sad that I already don’t have enough of what I need?

There is no malice, just sadness.

I've been talking to this guy for four months. He's newly poly and is seeing me and another girl. They have NRE, but I'm the only one with NRE on our side. I don't know what to make of this. HE doesn't know what to make of this. Normally I would just assume he's not into me, but he said he does really like me and is trying to figure out himself why he doesn't have the intensity that I feel. He asked if it's possible he can only have NRE with one person at a time. I told him I have no idea because I've never had two relationships start so closely together. What do I do? And what do I do with all of this energy that I have besides trying not to be too much?

I 36m have been with my wife 37f for 17 years. We entered the lifestyle in our 20’s “before kids” went mono for several years while our kids were younger. Opened to poly just over two years ago.

I cannot find happiness for my wife talking to a new person to the point it makes me physically sick to think about them even talking. I know we are solid in our relationship but still can’t shake the feeling of inadequacy.

I want to feel happy for her and her feel comfortable sharing her experiences with me.

I'm right around the anniversary of our definitive breakup and no contact as per his wishes. It's been a year of changes as I've become a mom. One of the reasons we broke up was the changes brought on by pursuing parenthood with my nesting partner, who wanted a parallel relationship. And breaking up was right, as I could not have given hom the relationship that he wanted under the new circumstances.

I just miss him so much right now. I would have never imagined us being estranged. I wonder how his project turned out. I wonder about his sister's kids and the friend he had who I hit it off with but never pursued an independent friendship with. I have nobody to talk to about all the memories we made over 5 years. It was truly a clean break.

He was my best friend and I hurt him. I know he has ended other relationships with no contact. But i cannot let go of the fantasy that we can reconnect again and be in each other's lives, down the line.

I know me reaching out would mean disrespecting his wishes. I won't, at least not now. How on earth can i get to a place of accepting that he might never want to talk to me again. That sad, sad conversation that we had a year ago at a train station, me 9 months pregnant, can't be the very last one.

End of moping for now.

I (23F) have known my partner (26F) for five years and we only started dating in July. She has two other partners while I've always been more monogamous. Early in our relationship she spent alot of time with me and focused on me alot while still doing the same to her other partners, but for the past couple weeks she's been talking to me less and less and spending almost every second she can with only one partner.

Her second partner I've known for a while and when I talked with her about it she just seemed used to this behavior from her, but to me it just feels unfair that I'm left hoping I'll get to spend time with her and getting only scraps. When she does talk to me shes sweet but when I try to bring up feeling left behind or overlooked she gets avoidant and doesn't respond till she can find a way to overlook what I brought up. She said last week "I'm allowed to demand time from her." and that "you aren't second best." but anytime I do ask for time from her, being as accommodating as possible, she just ignores me or blows me off to spend time with only this other partner.

It hurts my feelings alot because I just feel like I'm single again with the ghost of a relationship. Like she's too scared to tell me she doesn't want me anymore so she can have her cake and eat it too. Should I try and date other people? Should I just stop trying to put myself out there for her? I don't know, I love her alot when things are good but shes never here for me anymore and it hurts. If anyone has advice I'd really appreciate it.

This subreddit defines polyamory as being "openly, honestly, and consensually loving and being committed to more than one person" and I agree with that definition. Openness, however, covers a wide territory. Everyone important in my life knows that I have multiple partners, and would not be surprised if they ran into me with them on the street (which they sometimes have). And when I go on vacations with non-nesting partners, I'm totally upfront.

However, most of my nonpoly and nonkinky friends and relatives would rather not hear more, and in some cases have explicitly said so.

Now, the principle of consent is very important to me, especially coming out of the kink community. If someone says no, they don't want to hear more about my other partners, I take that very seriously. On the other hand, a lack of sustained contact makes things more difficult, from health crises to babysitting dogs and grandchildren.

What's your approach to navigating the gray area between 'closeted' and 'completely out'?

Tl;dr - my best friend is relatively new to poly and is taking sexual health risks - should I tell her what I think about it?

My best friend who has been in a monogamous marriage for 10 years has opened her relationship last year. She initially wanted to have an affair but I convinced her to be honest with her husband because knowing him I believed he could handle the truth.
Over the course of several careful conversations she revealed to her husband that she has a crush on another couple and wants an open relationship. He accepted it. She also told him that she's fine with him exploring other relationships but doesn't really want to know about them.

This is not the type of polyamory/open relationship I'd prefer and I feel like don't ask don't tell can easily backfire, but it's also not my relationship and I don't want to give advice where it's not wanted nor needed.

Unfortunately, the couple she's dating had some STI risks recently. My friend freaked out and came to me for comfort - I tried my best to give her accurate information about testing and actual dangers associated with certain infections without being judgemental. When I asked if she uses protection with the couple she said she doesn't because "they're not sleeping with anyone else".
She's also set on not telling her husband about this situation, because she hasn't directly told him the nature of her relationship with the couple is sexual.

I'm trying to be accepting and non-judgemental but this really bothers me and I feel like she's putting her husband at risk without his knowledge or consent.

My friend is very sensitive and has a lot of internalized shame about the topic, so I'm afraid that bringing it up will result in her shutting down completely.

Should I bring my concerns up? If yes then in what way?

Title says it, I'm feeling pretty pissed about this. My partner (we'll call Meatball) and their "partner" (we'll call Nyquil) have been seeing each other for about 4 months. Meatballs has been head over heels for Nyquil since they met. Absolute whirlwind romance. Meatball was talking to Nyquil everyday and was always there to take care of their emergencies, and just nonstop texting as well as. By every metric you can think of, it looked like a relationship. Kissing, sex, I love yous, dates, the whole thing. They even talked about moving in together, which I shut down because I don't want to live with my metas. The thing is, Nyquil was not comfortable putting a label on their relationship because of something related to their past trauma, I wasn't going to ask. Well, Nyquil met someone new. They have been seeing them for a week, and they told Meatball that they were "never romantically interested" in them. What. The. Fuck. You mean to tell me that you were crying to Meatball about how you were scared they would leave because of an STI scare? You were baby talking them on our couch, talking about how you guys are "basically the same person"? And that was all in the name of? A platonic relationship? Gtfo of here. I should have kept my mouth shut but I couldn't. I told Meatball that Nyquil is not welcome at the house anymore and I absolutely will not have anything to do with them, and that it seems like they have been led on. There's many other smaller details as well that I'm not going to include, but I'm pissed. How could someone not even give my partner the decency of a proper break up and instead just gaslight them? Meatball is so wonderful and passionate about people, and I hate seeing them being treated like this.

My little omelettes,

We made it to the funny sex number. Can I get some "nice"s in the twitch chat?

A little sick over here, but damn happy its Friday and that I get to hang out with some of my favorite people. Some ya'll though... better watch yourself... >:O

My last week was fun and tiring. My GF came to visit, we hung out lots, we sinned a ton, we ate good food, we got some metas-meeting action on and they basically loved each other, pretty sick stuff going on in the PM_CGR front. My life is dope, and I do dope shit.

It's the subreddit's (un)official Friday vibe thread! Let's break out the cheese, do some hand stuff to one another, lay your offerings at my feet that I might bless you with but a crumb of my attention, and let's get weird with it.

-------------------------------------

Rat Union Question(s) of the Week:

• What's your metas-meeting feel good story, or, what is your metas-meeting horror story?
• You look cute today (not a question)
• What type of sinning have you never gotten around to trying, but want to?
• And, as always, you may treat these as my personal office hours if you have any questions for your fearless leader directly. ❤️

-------------------------------------

Schmoovin',

PM_CGR

This is sort of both a happy post, a vent, and an ask for solutions others have come up with, whether those were mindset shifts or changes in action!

I have two currently parallel partners who both want to see almost all of the same movies in theaters, which is awesome. I love going to the movies, I love talking about movies, I love people who love movies. One day, the two of them may meet, may become friends, and maybe we will all go see movies together, metas included, but MAYBE NOT 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s an option but not a requirement. Either way, it’s not the situation now and there are so many movies to see 😭

To any other poly folks with more than one partner who likes going to the movie theater: what sort of planning and mindset has helped you feel like you’re able to show up for multiple people as well as get your movie needs met?

I know there’s no easy answer outside of figuring out what I want, chatting to each partner about what they want, and seeing what we can do, but it’d be nice to hear y’alls stories and methods, if even just for assurance that others are out there successfully problem solving the same thing.

Context -

• I, late-20s NB - partner of 1.5 years with
• "Artichoke", early-30s F/NB - also partner of 6 years with
• "Barley", early-30s NB - also partner of 3 years with
• "Carrot", early-30s M/NB

Artichoke, Barley, and Carrot live together and have some significant long-term life plans together. I am KTP with Barley and Carrot and overall think they are cool and good people. (Side note here- I do not want the kind of significant long-term life plans with Artichoke that they all have together, at least not at this point, and genuinely really want their whole situation to work out well!)

However the three of them have been having tension/conflict for a while over various things, largely related to Carrot's mental health issues but also some significant ongoing house/chores and communication stuff. I'm starting to feel concerned about Artichoke's wellbeing and future in this situation.

I have a lot of feelings about the situation and thoughts that I want to tell Artichoke, but I know it's not directly my problem/business. (Although it kind of becomes my problem when Artichoke suddenly asks to stay over at my house because things are so bad at theirs...?) I'm trying to figure out where the line is in terms of what I say to Artichoke, since I know their relationship with Barley isn't my business and they're an adult who can handle their own shit. But if Artichoke was a friend I would have lots to say about the situation, yknow? It's just hard to not say much while watching Artichoke be (as I perceive it) put under significant stress by Barley & Carrot.

Also, a particular factor at work here is that Artichoke has already had to sorta start their life over once before after a long bad relationship & housing situation. So they really don't want to go through that again, and I'm nervous that they will put up with way more than they should in order to avoid that here.

Any advice on where to draw the line on what to say or not say? I know my I'm not giving much specifics on the situation so may be hard to give advice but would love any thoughts. TIA!

Background: I have been poly for 2.5 years and I date with the intention of pursuing long term relationships. Now I have two partners of 6 and 2.5 years.

So my(31F) girlfriend A***(34F) of 1.5 years broke up with me today and it is another straw of making me question some things about polyamory.

So one of her other partners broke up with her a few weeks ago in such a horrible way and this led to her freaking out and breaking up with all of her other partners except the one she lives with(for now). With her breaking up with me there wasn't any yelling, zero threats of violence or suicide. None of that, just talking and crying. She told me I didn't do anything wrong. We never lied to each other, we never fought with each other. We both found each other pretty, we both found each other interesting. She said I did nothing wrong at all. She just didn't love me in the same long term way that I love her. Things were left pretty open doors between us. We are still friends, we still care about each other, we still love each other in ways(her words). Part of me thinks she is going to change her mind when she stops feeling so hurt by her being broken up with.

This isn't the first time a relationship has ended while being polyamorous, but it is the first more substantial relationship that has ended. It stings, badly. In fact all of them have hurt.

Like, am I doing poly wrong? I don't feel like I am. I'm attractive, I'm successful, I do things that are widely considered interesting, I date with purpose and good intentions.

It is just hard dealing with people I care about coming in and out of my life. I am someone who doesn't stop feeling love for people.

How do you handle being around people who you really like, but with the knowledge that they probably aren't going to be there for you long term?

I feel really pissed off and possessive.

My wife asked to open the marriage and within like two months was flying out to have basically barrier-less sex with another man. It's taken some time to get passes the jealousy but whatever.

Recently, she discovered that after this LD meta representing he was divorced; turns out he's not!

I should feel glad - I was pissed this relationship became anything beyond CNM (and it did, I selfishly went snooping) and it serves my wife right for running head first into NRE with not enough vetting. And yet, I feel really mad at him and sorry for her.

Again, why? I feel like all the complaints I had about her moving too fast are completely vindicated but my body won't savor the moment. Any help?

Things are escalating and I don't know what to feel

My nesting partner has always been respectful in all aspects. We've been together for 3 years and poly since the beggining. She's had several casual fwb relationships over the years but has has always communicated she ideally wants another longer term partner.

Recently shes been talking and hanging with his guy and she admitted to me last night that they haven't even been intimate but the relationship is getting deeper on an emotional level and she is recognizing she has feelings for him. This is alot as she doesnt associate sex with love so I know this is deep. She plans on talking to him about these feelings when she feels comfortable and safe with him and seeing where things go with it. From what she has told me the feeling seems mutual.

I guess this post is to vent and say that I'm feeling really weird and I don't really know how to feel and my mind has a lot of what ifs on how our relationship may shift if this becomes a thing. Im not scared to lose her but change is scary, I feel as I've been comfortable with her only having casual hookups where my mind never thought this day would come and now its here. With her fwb she would only see them so often, with this guy even where they are now without talking about where the feelings may progress she says she is open to diving in and seeing where things go, of course while respecting my needs. That's another thing.. I feel guilty for expressing my needs now that she has feelings. I dont want to hold her back but thats probably room for disaster if I just let her do whatever and not commuinicate. She says she recognizes the NRE and believes she is very logical in handling it which I believe from just her personality alone but will need to see happen in real time.

Ive seen nothing but green flags if this feeling does progress but it's definitely a new feeling for both of us to have and I just want to know better ways to navigate it so it doesn't become unhealthy. Im good at sabbatoging. Ive had alot of comparison moments and jealousy in the past with her fwb, Im definitely an over communicater and analyzer in our relationship and with her fwb we went through alot of ups and downs trying to find out what boundaries worked best for us. It's gotten way healthier on my end but I just wanna work towards success and not end up in a bad place. Thanks for listening.

I hope this post is ok, I tried searching for this topic and didn't find anything related!

Husband and I have been poly since before we got together. I don't currently have a partner because I'm recovering from being a school teacher (aka having no personal life and in a toxic career field). Husband has a girlfriend a couple hours drive away who has known him since high school but is still newish to poly. She has 2 kids, adult and teen. Girlfriend and I get along fantastic. Kids all like and/or adore each other and parents.

I have 2 kids - one adult teen from previous marriage who still lives at home 50% and a 6yo. Youngest is child of my current husband.

If it matters... I am 44 NB, Husband is 41m, girlfriend is 40f.

We don't see them more than about once or twice a month, sometimes longer.

I started homeschooling the youngest this year for a variety of reasons, poly not one of them. I have a fantastic homeschool co-op we're involved in that us secular and open minded, so far as I've found. I am out to one other mom who has been amazingly accepting and friendly. I'm cautious about coming out to any others just because I don't know how they would react and I'm in the group for my youngest.

I have offered to homeschool husband's GF's youngest, and we (3 adults) have all played with the idea of co-living. Her youngest asked me if I could homeschool her (don't want to get into personal reasons). If we were to have a living situation I would kind of "out" myself to the co-op. My biggest concern is any backlash the kids might get (my youngest and GFs youngest). At the same time, I think the co-op would also be a good fit for the teen if we do homeschool her too.

We'll probably be discussing it when we go to visit this weekend and I'm sure we'll figure it out without advice; honestly I'm just wondering if there are other poly families that homeschool and how you handle co-ops and social interactions in homeschool related activities.

Since I've been home and not working full time I've been feeling more isolated than I thought I would getting into homeschooling - I can't easily talk to poly friends and families without my 6yo listening in these days, unless I do it via chat/email. It's not a secret to any of our kids, but I want our 6yo to notice the relationship dynamic organically, if that makes sense, and answer questions as they come up. That's how we've handled it with the rest of the kids, too.