I apologise if I'm in the wrong space, and if I am then Im wondering if I can be directed into the appropriate space possibly? I do come to Reddit for some things but it's usually computer related so I'm not too sure if this is the correct place. I apologise if it's wrong.

I'm 23(man) and my best friend is also 23 (woman). She is transgender, I've known her for 10 years. I've seen everything (I think, I may be wrong) in her journey.

I'm wondering if I should feel uncomfortable or this is somewhat okay (I'm personally so uncomfortable with it). She is the only transgender person I've ever known (that I am aware is transgender) and of course I am not myself so I could be so extremely wrong. Which is why I'm here, I don't know anyone else with experience in this stuff beside her and I don't know if she'd like me to bring it up. I know she doesn't use Reddit and after speaking to her boyfriend it doesn't seem he does either.

So she has a boyfriend of like 9 months or so, could be less or so. He's nice and what not, they had a rocky start with "I don't know if I'd be comfortable with being with a trans lady" but he turned around and saw who she truly is. I've been happy for them and I've truly thought he was so lovely for her as an opinion. However, he has his main group of friends and they're all cis men (as a fact). And if I'm correct, they're all straight too. Why I'm only mentioning their sexuality is because if I AM correct then for what I know they have no tie to the LGBT+ at all. I don't really talk to them so I'm not sure on everything. From what my bestfriend has told me, she doesn't speak to his friends. She has her own + me, he has his own friends. That's fine. Me and her are of course really close but also really independent so I'm never entirely sure. Important to note.

One day a few weeks ago, her boyfriends friends asked SPECIFICALLY him AND her to come to one of their houses because they had a surprise for HIM. I've capitalised those words because they're important in my mind. Remember she doesn't speak to his friends. He drove both of them to whichever house it was, and they held a box towards him. He opened the box and there was a t-shirt. The t-shirt had a big red arrow pointing to the side, and it said "this is my TRANS PARTNER". I think from the details of what I've heard from everyone-Ish involved it was custom made but I could be wrong. He held it up to his chest and his friends (a group of like 8, I'm not entirely sure but around that number) bursted out laughing. From this point, it's entirely from my best friends account and I believe her. My girlfriend is the one who picked her up from the house and encouraged me to ask people who are more experienced.

They started laughing and so did her boyfriend. They were saying how her boyfriend should parade "IT" around "WHILST WEARING THE SHIRT". in that context, "IT" doesn't mean the tshirt. After the whole situation "died down", he was still trying to defend his friends and explain how she was "overreacting". He still defends himself on it. She ran out crying and called me to pick her up but I was at work so I asked my girlfriend to. Boyfriend didn't try to take her home or even ask if she's okay. My girlfriend picked her up and my bestriend was sobbing quite a lot apparently. She is a STRONG ASH woman so if she ran out the house sobbing then I know something was wrong. Afterwards when I was home from work she explained everything and both me and my girlfriend felt absolutely disgusted, but at the same time my bestfriend tried to play it off and make it out as if it's normal. She doesn't really talk about being trans. The only thing I know is that sometimes trans women use gay dating apps or sites to find understanding people, which is where she met her boyfriend which I'm going to be so honest right now that doesn't sit right with me either (I apologise for keeping saying this but I mean it, again I could be wrong). When she came out, she explained the medical process and that's it. I don't know the whole dynamic of it all.

To me, her boyfriends frięnds were making fun of HIM for having a trans girlfriend. Or even possibly making fun of her for being trans. Am I crazy? If you were to ask me genuinely how I feel about the situation I'd say it's disgusting. I understand as a straight trans woman you may meet some weird men. Well no, you likely WILL meet some strange men. But he seemed normal for about a year. Does this seem like he doesn't take the relationship seriously or no? To me, it could be that he may have some mistakes when it comes to understanding trans people which I get in some way but at the same time don't get into a relationship with a trans person if you aren't going to listen to them, or he could just be an asshole.

It feels wrong to me that he tries to defend himself, because at this moment, he still thinks there's no wrong in what he and his friends did. It's not even neccesarily what they DID, but what her boyfriend DIDNT do (like check on her or listen to her).

But again, I'm very open to being wrong and taught why that is. Their relationship is none of my business, realistically. But I'm going crazy on this. I may delete if I get worried she'll see this but I genuinely don't know where to go. She has her own life and this won't affect that, I just REALLY need to know if I'm crazy or not. I want her to be safe and with someone who won't treat her badly.

Again, sorry if this is wrong or the wrong place or wrong whatever. Thank you, lovelies. <3

Edit: I appreciate everyone's understanding responses. I'm trying to respond to them as I have time available. I also apologise if this post gets delete, I already feel horrible for talking about a personal moment that isn't mine but it's gotten a lot of views and I worry. I appreciate you guys for taking my points in and understanding my feelings and my best friends feelings. I hope you have a wonderful night/day you lovely people <333 much love from me!

Hi. Ive had srs several years ago and I think its the worst decision Ive ever made. I cried about my dick sure but Ive cried about my vagina way more.

It smells so awful and I dont know what Im supposed to do to stop it! I take showers and clean myself dor like an hour but midway through the day people tell me I smell because my vagina keeps leaking this disgusting smelling fluid constantly!

It's hurt my relationships with people I know irl because they think Im unclean when I try so hard to keep myself smelling nice. My panties get soaked with strange foul smelling stains and it makes me feel awful about myself. I havent even had sex since srs because I just feel so damn disgusting in a sexual way and I dont want people to have to deal with my smell.

Like is there a way to reverse srs? Or even just renove my genitals altogether? Ive had 3 revision surgeries for various issues but nothing stops it from being like this.

My self image has plummeted more and more and Ive started saying Im asexual when in reality I just feel like anyone would hate to be near my naked body.

I miss my penis at this point. I see trans girls happy with their genitalia and wearing cute cages and then I just start crying and feeling like nothing but some weird monster.

Im at my wits end. I dont know what Im supposed to do. Im crying so much and no matter how much I wash the smell just returns. Please help. Please.

My goodness I have found the perfect panties to wear without any tucking (I can’t tuck comfortably :( ) and just wanted to share my find for others looking for a good fit…let me tell you girls, Victoria secrets hiphugger panties fit me perfectly and are a great option for those who struggle tucking like myself! Thats all, hope you girls have a great rest of your day!

Hey everyone. Long-time lurker, first-time poster. I've been on HRT for almost 7 years now, and I still show up to work in boymode every single day.

I'm a diesel tech, so mechanics uniform, a shop full of guys who've known me for years. My family and close friends know me as Jamie, but at work and most places out in the world, I'm still him. Seven years of changes that I mostly keep to myself between clock-in and clock-out.

It's a strange place to be. I'm proud of how far I've come, but some days it feels like I'm living two lives and only getting to be myself in one of them.

Anyone else out there years in and still boymoding at work? Did you ever make the jump? What finally did it for you?

I hate, like most trans girls, the taste of spiro. blech.

So, to counteract the taste, I decided to have some cheese with it.

I thought " Oh my god, great Idea, you're a genius girly" until I realized this was the exact shit I pulled with my stupid beagle.

Bangs really do help you look good

God i remember i had a jacked gym bro phase and that made it so much harder to believe i was a trans woman when i came out.
Y’all too?

Legit just euphoria posting since I’m still super happy.

Context, year and like 4 months on HRT and I’m definitely starting to pass even without signficantly trying.

I needed to run to the store, so it was legit just skinny jeans, oversized sweatershirt, and a cute beanie.

Anyways when I stopped at the gas station, the clerk (older gentleman) said “Will that be all for you darling?” And once I left said “Now have a good night darling”. Wasn’t creepy, just respectful.

Oh I’m still riding the high and that was last night. Darling?! Darling?!

Anyways I’m gonna go feel like an absolute hot bitch for the next week.

Tl:dr - 1st 2 paragraphs under the actual advice. Im in bed. Ill get better with it. 🤣

What does that mean? Lol
You are different…but also not really. It is ok to vent and venting is good for healing but sometimes too much venting or festering at times where you dont need to can make you stress at times where you dont need to. Yes. Dysphoria is a bitch so i can’t police that pain as i know the depth of it and the tragedy of it. However, keeping our minds on a sort of guide or baseline set of rules can keep us focusing on more healthy things like: exercising, learning things, diet, habits, hobbies, etc. to enrich our womanly growth in whatever way is healthier.
—————————————-
SISTER ADVICE WEEKLY - Stop comparing yourselves so HARSHLY to other girls at the 1-3 year mark.

Hell id even say 4 year mark but 1-3 years is typically where i see alot of people being sad the most. Well, that’s obvious because those are the beginning years. You are a baby trans and yes some other girls get “lucky” at those times but that doesn’t mean they are done. They will also go thru shifts and don’t represent the majority of transitions. You have to think of it like those girls who grow maybe earlier or faster and have periods and breast development super early. Its not typical. It happens but that’s not how things normally work and that’s not how things normally work here.

Puberty can last up to 10 years and theres no difference here. Well, theres a bit of a difference. We aren’t talking about those who start super young - those girls are going to show faster results. If you see a girl who is in her teens, dismiss the growth for yourself - they are valid but their growth also doesn’t illustrate what it means to transition. It might be painful to see but such is life. Move forward or try to. Boring you with the “this is a marathon “ today ib think ill pass mostly but hey…most puberties are.
——————— Tl:dr Over 🤔

Please DO compare every so often because there ARE complications, improper dosing, asshole sabotaging doctors, ignorant doctors and some of your results CAN and (unfortunately because every place isn’t the most informed about us) WILL be affet by these things, just do your best to be informed on what dosing, bloodwork and such is typical for trans women optimal results, align yourself with that according to your health and monitor it while remembering that 1-3 years just isn’t gonna cacoon and blossom you into The Little Mermaid, Queen Latifah or Rhea Ripley over night…and yes: over night is 1-3 years lol

You can slightly panic after 3 years but shietttt even 4-5 years might be the mark for some of us because we are all different. But the 1-3 year panic is because we are comparing our progress too hard to those who APPEAR to be “overnighting it”. I know its slow and painful but try to focus on: getting money, getting out of your bad living situation, getting out of your country, exercising your femininity, building a path to your optimal transition, learning about the world or the best places to start a life that supports you transition, art, hobbies, womanly things, girly things, motherly things, exercises that assist your future self’s body goals.

Your future self needs nurturing so don’t fall too hard in the despair of the first 1-3 years. Use that time to learn, exercise, learn self and make some moves. Transition is not just about hrt… LET’S GET IT GIRLS!!!! 💪🏽💃🏽🥰🪽💅🏽🌟💕

As the title says, I realized recently that I had freckles. In fact, I have a ton of them! My face kinda exploded with freckles like these were not here a few months ago??? For context I'm 10 months on hrt. I remember I used to be jealous of my little sister for having freckles because in my opinion they made her look cute. Now who knew that I would end up with them too? I am so happy about it! :) does this kind of thing happen to you gals?

I recently decided I would like to wear nail polish. Black. My mum bought me some, helped me apply it and now im gonna wear it into college (16-18 year olds in uk) tomorrow. This is gonna be my second big step, wearing my first beauty cosmetic in public. But im also lowkey nervous cause like what if people receive it poorly? And please dont just hit me with one of those "who cares what other people think?" Because I do, and so does my anxiety.

Anyways! Enough moping I need sleep

I started my wardrobe of women's clothes recently and never really took it out in public. But today I went to a market on main street with my girlfriend, and I did the full routine for the first time! Shave, hide beard shadow, makeup, hair, and lovely outfit with new shoes and a maxi skirt

I always hated dressing myself as a man, but today I felt finally like I was dressed like me. It felt like such a relief to walk around like this, felt really pretty and super comfortable.

Didn't get my first "ma'am" quite yet, I did get a "my man", but a lady also said my skirt was really pretty, so it balances out

Came home and just felt super warm and giddy all day. This was the first time I ever inhabited the world as my feminine self. Just feel super lucky I finally realized everything, I really had no idea what I had been missing

Like when I see my bra strap it makes me happy:) like I just want to hear what small things you get euphoria from. Could be how you look, what you wear. I just want to hear

So someone in my place of living thought my estrogen vial was supposed to be refrigerated. Thinking they were doing my a favor, they put it in the fridge. I’m already a day late for my shot. I’m only a few months into HRT so I’m new to this and I looked and found mixed responses on whether or not it’ll be okay after warming. Will it be okay after warming to room temperature? Please help.

I’m fortunate that my wife and two kids have been unbelievably supportive in my transition. They have helped me with makeup, picking clothes, and are very affirming, everything.

The challenge we face now is my “parent name”. “Daddy” and the like do not make my identity. I cringe when I’m called that. However, my wife is “mommy” and I do not want to take that from her. She earned that, it would be confusing for us both to be “mommy” or similar, and I want to respect her as a magnificent mom.

We just can’t come up with other ideas. Names like mom1, mother, ma, mum, mpa, and mummy are all out for the reasons above.

We are considering Ama, but it sounds a bit odd.
My kids don’t want to use my actual name.

Any suggestions or ideas? How have others solved for this?

I swear. The day after my injection, my sense of smell multiplies. I choke on mild exhaust fumes, can count the people by their body odor on the public transport, have an idea who had been where at work recently.

I am suprised this is not talked about more. It's insane. The day after my shot vs the day before my shot is night and day difference.

I'm 3,5 years in HRT and for some time I've been thinking how many things there are that most people can't really understand, but only those who've transitioned. I wanted to hear what's yours and I hope to read your experiences and discussion on how you're dealt with the issues :)

My tits are growing yay

basically, im a figure skater right (i promise this is relevant) and i was at practice a couple of weeks ago - im speaking to this girl, she gives me help on a few elements, i compliment her skates. very normal interaction. literally about THIRTY seconds after, a hockey boy comes up to me and goes "you know shes trans right?" and im like wtf so i just say "how do u know that" and he like gestures and goes like "look at her!" and i look back and im still like ?? like she was trans, she was pretty passing (i didnt even think of anything when i was talking to her, but why would i?!) but she was just tall with broud shoulders. So i turn to him and im like "so what?" and he just kinda huffs and walks away. i keep talking to her obviously because shes very sweet and we got along well.

but im just surrounded by people who r SO transphobic like esp towarss trans women and i dont know what else to say to them to try and convince them otherwise. They have the mindset of like "trans women are predators" n stuff (even tho statisrics literally say that ISNT TRUE?!) then rhey have confirmation bias so as soon as ONE trans woman is a predator that means ALL of them are 🫩🫩🫩 anyway, im just kinda here to ask what other arguements i can provide to try and convert them to allyship? i thought id come to the actual community that they are mainly targeting, they js kinda forget trans men exist/think they are women playing "dress up" or smth.

for context, im some sort of genderqueer, i dont know. im afab, i present and go by she/her irl, dress femininely. but i go by he/him online and pretty much pretend to be a guy online. I dont really care about any pronouns or about being either sex. im not out to anyone irl because.. well, obvious reasons after what ive just said

EDIT : was rereading this post. pretty sure the boy didnt even say "she", think he either said "he" or "it" 🤢🤢

I’m sure she’s gonna be fine but I’m just such a worrier and I wish I could be at her side right now. I’m so frickin proud of her and her courage that she has for this. I absolutely love her so much, we’re both trans and just so happy together. I can’t wait to see her when she’s done. Any reassurance and support would be greatly appreciated with easing my anxiety tho

Hi everyone ! I started laser 2 weeks ago and the lady of the laser center told me not to shave between sessions as it could "wrong the results". I went back there to make sure I had not missheard while I was stressed because internet says "nah you can shave after a few days", but she confirmed that if I shaved I would probably need more sessions.

I was able to hold it for 2 weeks. Now most hair has fallen off but I still have pretty long patches of hair around random spots and I don't think they are willing to fall off until a few sessions.

Like, having a beard was hard, but having a holed long beard ? Unbearable.

Has any of you been told that before ? Have you shaved anyways ? I feel like I might be their first mtf beard removal and they might not give me an adapted response.

Peace ✨

Apart from the mainstream, white cis-dominated LGBTQ culture and political movement... is there a discernible transgender culture? As in values, rituals, customs, etc. that we collectively share as trans and non-binary people? Or, perhaps a loose collection of subcultures?

I'm not sure if I'm going crazy or what but today I looked myself in the mirror and it feels like they're bigger, or maybe rounder or idk.

I'm only two months into HRT so i don't think so

TW: suicidal ideation, depression

I'm too tired to type but I still feel like I need to get this out somewhere. I'm 2 months on estrogen and I've committed to presenting fem at uni because the idea of boymoding was making me think I would explode.

The consequences of that? The first thing is that I have to get up and hour and a half early to do my makeup because I'm very slow with that, leading to me pretty much being exhausted 24/7 since I start classes at 8 am every morning. The second thing is that I've skipped class twice now because I just got ready in the morning, looked at myself in the mirror and detested what I was looking at (compounded by the fact that I don't have enough girl clothes for the current cold weather so I unsuccessfully try to make my old merch work, but it just makes my shoulders look huge) to the point where I couldn't get myself to leave the apartment. Most of my classes have a mandatory 80% attendance rate so if this ever happens to me again I'm fucked and can't take my exams. When it happens I usually just give up when I realise it's too late to fix things and that I'm going to be late anyway so I just go to bed and cry all day.

I also just feel like such a burden because every time I get depressed like this I can't help but start doom/depression posting on social media or saying self loathing things to my friends, they must be so exhausted by my behaviour. And then I feel even worse, and then even more so when most people don't notice or just ignore my vents because they're getting frequent so they probably just zone that shit out.

It would be easier to just wipe myself from the memories of everyone and quietly die off but at the same time I just want people to understand what I was going through before I go. Idk it's kinda selfish I guess but I just want people to feel bad for me and try and help me but I know it's hard because I would probably also have a hard time being on the other end of all this. I feel so childish and like there's no hope left for me.

Every since I realized I was a woman, I haven't been able to get off to the same porn I used to watch. It's so weird. It's like a switch got turned off and now imaging myself as the "man" in sex scenes does absolutely nothing for me. All of the porn I used to watch turns me off, and so I've had to find new material.

I decided to go for realistic/loving porn, as most porn is filmed in quite an objectifying way (towards women) and I wanted to find something I could identify with. I found this really lovely video of a couple kissing and making love and I found it beautiful, so I decided to "try it out," so-to-speak.

Well, that was a BIG MISTAKE. I literally started bawling my eyes out because 1) it was so tender and loving and beautiful and 2) it made me wish that I was the woman in the video. The way she was held and touched and fucked just made me so upset that I couldn't be her. I hate the fact that I was born as a man and that I probably won't be able to be like her for several years (inshallah).

I know it's all a matter of perspective, and I know that sex isn't off the table just because I'm a trans woman. I know there are lots of trades out there. But still. To be made love to as a woman would be a dream come true :))

Note: I am not a sex-obsessed pervert. Just a sad girl who wants to be loved