Helpful Links

Problem/Goal: You have the slightest doubt o kutob sa partner but still thinking of marrying that person.

My advice: Don't do it and just leave. Just leave for your sake, to save yourself from a life of heartaches. May kutob ka na something's not right? Well it's there to protect or warn you. Sabi nga nila when you're in a train that's heading in the wrong direction, leave at the earliest next stop. The longer you stay the heavier the price you'll have to pay. Have courage. Pls.

Problem/Goal: got asked this on a date and couldn’t really answer well

Context: remembered an incident wherein i (25f) went on a date with an older guy (mid 30s) for dinner, it was alright at first but then he suddenly asked “what do you bring to the table?”

it was my first time hearing that so i was a little confused and asked what he meant by that, he said he will be providing everything from finances and whatnot, so what can i offer to him in return? it seemed to me that he had everything so i told him well companionship - i’m a loyal partner, i give my best to my loved ones and no doubt that i would try my hardest to keep the relationship strong

he then went on about how that’s not enough, long story short, it ended without us communicating again - just made me wonder how i can answer it for next time?

i have my own job and provide for myself and give to my family, very much independent, and i like to look my best and stay active

Problem/goal: Dating a legally married man

Context: I know walang divorce dito sa Pilipinas and matagal ang process ng annulment. I really like this guy na married but hiwalay na sa asawa nya.

Previous attempts: Can you advise me guys if how was it? Ano yung good and bad experience nyo about it if meron ba. We've been dating for a while and I can say na he's a really good man. Yun nga lang kasi he's legally married.

I really appreciate any insights.

Thank you!

Problem/Goal:

I am going through a difficult and turbulent time with my LIP, our friends are not aware but they have been noticing that we are distant, ni di nga kami nagdidikit minsan. I keep covering up and saying na di lang talaga kami sweet.

Context:

We all went to a party that was really high energy and everyone was having a good time, however, as the evening progressed I felt lonelier and lonelier esp since all the couples were together and I was basically invisible to my LIP. Syempre this is months worth of heaviness I have been carrying, and acting that we're all good. I just felt like the most pathetic person in the room.

Umiyak ako, I broke down, I had friends ask me what's wrong and I ended up admitting na hindi ako okay. Months and months of pretending, I broke down. Hindi ko naman kwinento lahat, but I said something along the lines of "He doesn't want me anymore, hindi ba halata?"

Alam kong paguusapan kami after, my friend assured me hindi siya magkkwento na may problem kami. I appreciate the gesture pero alam ko naman di maiiwasan yun.

Now... I feel so much shame and embarrassment. Like I'm 30 and I still can't control my emotions! Sana hinayaan ko na lang, I should have protected myself, him, others perception of us. I don't know how to interact with them, di ko alam if kakaawaan lang ba nila ako if I still tag along with my LIP (we all became friends at the same time.)

It's been a few days and I feel so terrible parin. I don't want to talk about it with them, I don't want a spectacle. Wala na akong gana lumabas or magpakita kasi I was so vulnerable and sana tiniis ko na lang.

Previous Attempts:
n/a

Problem/Goal: Just wanted to ask for advice from fellow employers and even kasambahays regarding salary, workload, and setting expectations. My husband and I are planning to revisit our current arrangement with our kasambahay, and I want to know if we’re being reasonable or expecting too much.

Context: We live in a 150 sqm, 3-bedroom condo in Pasig. It’s just the two of us plus our small dog. Our kasambahay has been with us for almost 5 months, and her current salary is 10K/month.

Here’s our current setup:
- Stay-in, with her own bedroom. We also allow her to sleep in our guest room whenever we don’t have visitors.
- Free toiletries, food, and other basic necessities.
- She goes home every two weeks with two nights off.
- We shoulder her transportation expenses separately. I even book her Grab going to the MRT station para convenient for her.
- We consider her food preferences when buying groceries. My husband and I prefer healthy food, but since she’s quite selective with what she eats, we make sure she has food she likes stocked in the fridge.
- We don’t mind her eating our snacks and chocolates, although sometimes nagugulat na lang kami na almost ubos na pala, or packaging na lang natira. Haha.

As for her workload, to be fair, malinis naman siya sa condo. We don’t have major complaints about the cleanliness itself.

However, we’ve noticed that she tends to spread the household chores throughout the week, even when some tasks could probably be done more frequently. We feel like the routine could be more efficient and consistent.

Also, we still do quite a lot of things ourselves.

I still wash the dishes. We don’t ask her to cook because she only knows how to fry food. For our dog, kami pa rin usually ang nagpapakain, nagpapalit ng water and pee pads, naglilinis ng bowls, and nagpapaligo. We only ask her to take care of our dog occasionally kapag both kami maagang aalis or late makakauwi. Even walking our dog isn’t regular unless we specifically ask her.

For laundry, she also uses our washing machine weekly for her personal clothes, sometimes doing 2–3 separate cycles because she follows how we segregate our own clothes. We don’t necessarily mind, but we’re also trying to be more mindful of electricity and water consumption.

Basically, I think we’ve been quite flexible with our arrangement, but after almost 5 months, we’re realizing that we probably should’ve established clearer expectations from the beginning.

We’re considering increasing her salary to 12.5K/month, with mandatory government benefits properly arranged. Her legally required employee contributions would come from her gross salary, while we’ll shoulder our employer contributions separately.

At the same time, we want to sit down with her and establish a more detailed household schedule. This would include daily, weekly, and biweekly cleaning tasks, regular dog care, and cooking simple meals around 3 times a week. We’re willing to teach her how to cook and provide recipes since she doesn’t really know how yet.

We’re also planning to be more particular about household routines, supplies, laundry, and tasks that should be done without us constantly reminding her.

Our proposed schedule is:
7:30 AM–12 NN: Morning duties
12 NN–4:30 PM: Rest/break
4:30 PM–9 PM: Evening duties

That’s 9 hours of scheduled duties, with a 4.5-hour break in between. Of course, if she finishes her tasks early, she can rest na. We don’t expect her to work continuously just to fill the time, and we intend to make sure her working hours and rest periods comply with the Kasambahay Law.

Her two-night home leave every two weeks and transportation allowance will remain.

Previous Attempts: None

For those who employ stay-in kasambahays, especially in Metro Manila, do you think 12.5K is reasonable for this setup?

Is it fair to introduce additional responsibilities like cooking 3 times a week and regular dog care, considering we only have two adults and one small dog in the household?

Also, how strict are you with household schedules? Do you provide detailed checklists for daily, weekly, and biweekly tasks, or do you just let your kasambahay manage her own time? We’re not expecting perfection, and we genuinely want to be fair with compensation and rest. But we also want consistency and initiative, especially with recurring tasks that ideally shouldn’t require constant reminders.

Would really appreciate advice on how to approach this conversation without making her feel like we’re suddenly being too demanding. We want to establish a system that’s fair for both parties.

Thank you!

Problem/Goal: I think I'm destroying the first woman I've genuinely loved, and I don't know how to stop myself.

Context:

I'm a guy who's been through a lot, and honestly, I don't even know where to start.

Back in 2024, I caught my wife cheating on me after ten years together. I was loyal and committed to her. I gave that relationship everything I had, to the point where I forgot who I was as an individual.

We came from nothing. I worked my way up, built myself from the ground up, and tried to give our family a better life. We have a daughter who's now nine years old. And just when I thought we were finally getting somewhere, my wife cheated on me.

It devastated me. I couldn't understand how someone who knew where we started, someone who had been with me through all those struggles, could do that to me.

But here's where I have to admit something about myself.

After two months of dealing with the pain, I started getting involved with other women. I didn't love them. I wasn't looking for anything meaningful. I think I was just trying to fill a void, distract myself, or prove something to myself. It became a cycle. Almost every month, there was someone new. Eventually, people at my office knew about it, and I even got involved with women I worked with.

Some of those experiences ended badly, too. I was cheated on myself.

Looking back, I realize I became the kind of person I probably wouldn't have respected before. I played with people's feelings because I was hurting, and now I feel like all the pain I caused others is coming back to me.

Fast-forward to July 2026. I met someone.

For the first time since everything happened, I genuinely fell in love with someone again. I even told my family about her, something I had never done with anyone else after my marriage fell apart.

For context, people have always called me a genius. I'm good at solving problems, analyzing things, and thinking several steps ahead. But when it comes to this woman, I feel like an idiot who keeps making mistakes. I feel like I'm becoming an unforgivable sin in the eyes of someone I desperately don't want to hurt.

At first, things were good between us. We were happy, comfortable, and getting closer.

Then my demons came back.

And by demons, I mean my own mind.

Every single night, my brain simulates negative scenarios. Not just one or two, but multiple possibilities, each one more painful than the last. I imagine things that haven't happened, look for hidden meanings in small details, and try to prepare myself for situations that might not even be real.

One time, she mentioned having a male friend from high school. I got jealous, and my mind started creating scenarios about their relationship. Instead of dealing with my insecurity like a normal person, I decided to investigate.

I used social engineering and deliberately planned a flirtatious conversation with her friend to figure out his sexuality. I eventually concluded that he was gay.

When I told her what I had done, she was devastated.

And honestly, I understand why. Regardless of what I was trying to prove to myself, I crossed a boundary. I let my jealousy justify something I shouldn't have done.

I keep telling myself that I won't make the same mistakes again, but somehow, I end up doing something that hurts her.

The scary part is how attached I've become to her.

Within three months, my mind had already imagined an entire future with her. A family. A home. A peaceful life. Growing old together. All the things I once thought I had lost forever.

It feels like I've been attached to her for five years when, in reality, it's only been three months.

I know that sounds unhealthy. I know I'm probably getting ahead of myself. But I can't seem to stop my brain from building this future and then making me terrified of losing it.

Last month, I lost my job. She was there for me, both physically and emotionally, when I needed someone. I genuinely appreciated that.

I eventually landed a new job that pays twice as much as my previous one. I was happy for a few days, but that happiness faded quickly. Now I'm back to feeling depressed, anxious, and mentally exhausted.

Every night, my thoughts eat me alive. I've cried over things that haven't even happened. I lose sleep imagining scenarios that I have no evidence for. Sometimes, I feel like I can't take it anymore.

Lately, I feel like I'm constantly begging for her attention.

She's online, but somehow, I still feel alone. When we call, we sometimes have nothing to talk about. I try to start conversations, but I don't always feel that same interest coming from her.

I don't know if she's losing interest, if we're simply going through a normal phase, or if my own anxiety is making everything feel worse than it actually is.

And that's the problem. I don't know when to trust my instincts and when to recognize that it's just my mind trying to protect me from getting hurt again.

I don't want to become controlling. I don't want to keep investigating things, questioning everything, or making her feel like she has to prove herself to me.

I love her, and I want to treat her right. But sometimes, it feels like the more I love her, the more afraid I become. And the more afraid I become, the more likely I am to do something that pushes her away.

I used to think being intelligent meant being able to solve almost any problem. But I can't seem to solve this one. I can build systems, analyze complex problems, and think through countless possibilities, yet I can't get my own mind to give me a peaceful night.

I don't want to keep repeating the same mistakes. I don't want my past to destroy something that could have been good.

I want to understand what's happening to me, because right now, I feel like I'm losing a battle against my own mind.

Previous attempts: Sitting down to have that conversation felt like one of the most daunting tasks I had ever faced, as I began explaining to her my suffering and making her understand how my mind works. I wanted her to truly grasp the weight of my struggles, detailing the exact moments when the darkness felt suffocating, while also walking her through the intricate logic and emotional triggers behind my reactions.

THIS IS NOT A MADE UP STORY, THIS IS CURRENTLY WHAT I'M SUFFERING WITH.

Problem/goal: Hi, everyone. I need some advice. Please do not share this post on other platforms. I would appreciate it if this stays on Reddit.

Context: My fiancé (38M) and I (32F) have been together for 8 years and engaged for 5 years. Recently, he sent me a layout for our wedding invitation, but the reality is that we still don’t have enough money for the down payments for our wedding venue and caterer.

This has made me rethink our relationship and whether marriage is still the right decision for us.

When I met him, he was struggling financially. Eventually, he got work, but he didn’t really save for our wedding. After 8 years together, I feel like we should be much further along by now.

For context, I pay around 30,000 monthly for the mortgage on my house, on top of taxes and other expenses associated with owning it. The house is under my name and he has not contributed financially, aside from around 120 per month for the HOA fee.

Our arrangement is that he pays the utilities while I pay the mortgage. I also frequently cover groceries because he often falls short financially. On top of that, I support my sibling through college, so I have other financial responsibilities.

I understand that his employment opportunities are more limited because he only finished elementary school. He has worked different jobs, mostly job orders, and I’m often the one sending him job opportunities and encouraging him to apply.

For context , I currently work in a call center while pursuing my master’s degree.

I also want to acknowledge that he contributes in other ways. He does most of the household chores and drives me to and from work, even though my workplace is in another town. I appreciate these things, and I know they have value.

However, I can’t ignore the resentment that has been building up. I work hard, carry most of the financial responsibilities, and worry about our future. Meanwhile, there are times when I see him playing games or sleeping while I’m exhausted from working and trying to keep everything together.

My biggest fear is that I will spend the rest of my life being the breadwinner and carrying most of the financial burden. I’m not expecting him to be rich, and I understand that we have different educational backgrounds and earning capacities. What I want is a partner who takes initiative, plans for our future, and makes me feel that we are building a life together rather than leaving most of the responsibility to me.

After 8 years together and 5 years of being engaged, I’m tired. I’m beginning to wonder whether love and the years we’ve invested in this relationship are enough reason to get married. There was a year he earned almost like what I earned but he never save for the wedding.

I’m genuinely conflicted because we’ve been together for so long, and he does have good qualities. But I’m exhausted, and I’m scared of what our future will look like if nothing changes.

TL;DR: My fiancé (38M) and I (32F) have been together for 8 years and engaged for 5, but we still can’t afford the down payments for our wedding venue and caterer. I pay around ₱30k monthly for my house, I own the house, frequently cover groceries, and support my sibling through college. He pays the utilities, does most of the household chores, and drives me to and from work, but I often feel like I’m carrying most of the financial burden and taking more initiative toward our future. I’m exhausted and afraid I’ll be the breadwinner forever. Am I being unfair, or should I reconsider marrying him despite our years together?

I did encourage him to study but he said he will see but nothing happens.

For those who have been in similar situations, I’d appreciate your honest advice

Previous attempts: Almost every day we have arguments regarding money. I discussed these over the years. There are improvements since he found a job but they're JOs so he becomes broke and unemployed again.

Problem/Goal: I won't call it naman na problem pero hindi ba unspoken rule na dapat magdala kapag bisita ka sa bahay ng may bahay? or ako lang ba yung may unspoken rule na don't go to someone's house empty handed?

Context: May new friend group kasi ako na mga titas (and gay) from zumba dance classes. Ok naman kami, mag almost 1 year na kami as a friend group. So usually we hang out even outside of zumba classes na like eat out ganun or try other activities like pilates etc. Pero recently, they found out na my house is nearby lang, so ginagawa na nilang tambayan yung place ko minsan. I don't mind naman at first pero pansin ko lang na ang lakas nila mag snack on whatever food I have sa kitchen or pantry (magpapaalam sila pero after nakain na nila lol, like "ay kumuha ako nitong snack ha, ok lang ba?" pero subo subo na, basta, gets naman siguro what I mean). I don't mind naman kasi mga small snacks lang naman yun like chips and cookies or crackers or mga random pastries and sweets na I have sa bahay.

So yung isang tita (Let's call her Abby), nag suggest na mag wine night sa place ko since nakita niya yung display ko na wine, I told them na ok lang naman basta they bring something like snacks, cheese, crackers or fruits. Kumbaga, mag ambag naman diba.

Came yung wine night, wala silang dala na anything. Ewan. Ang off lang. So ang nangyari tuloy, sa pantry ko sila kumuha lang din ng mga crackers and snacks and fruits. Lakas din nila mag post sa social media kahit wala namang ambag.

After that night, sabi ng husband ko never to invite them again sa house kasi he noticed na user friendly lang tong mga to and siguro he saw din how disappointed I was. And I agreed.

Previous Attempts: Sinabi ko na may construction na gagawin si husband sa house so bawal muna visitors. Now they are asking if pwede mag Christmas gathering daw yung group namin sa bahay. Ay hindeeeeee. Bahala kayo jan

Anyway, tama naman ginawa ko no? Hindi worth it na ituloy tong friendship na ganito right? Paano unti unti i let them go ng hindi naman sila ma ooffend na ayaw ko na sila kasama

Problem/Goal: My friend is 13000km away, depressed and alone, and I ask for help in praying for him. How do I talk to him? What can I tell him? I don't want to sound nagging too

Context: When we met, he had been amazing, caring and mindful. But earlier this year, he felt lonely and had some family issues. He got depressed, failed his daily routine and started to gamble.

I prayed and prayed for his redemption and restoration. I prayed that the light be brought back in his eyes and the clouds be lifted.

I see glimpses of hope, he's trying to restructure his day and sought expert help. But he still goes back to his cycle after a while.

He's 13000km away and I ask for prayers over him too please

Problem/Goal: I sometimes get embarrassed with my mOm

Context: 4 years ago, I got married and until now, kasama pa rin namin sa bahay ang family ng husband ko. Even before that, hindi na rin ako masyadong nakatira with my mom kasi I wasn’t comfortable living with her ex-boyfriend. Eventually, naging distant kami kahit dati super close naman kami. This year, they finally broke up, so I decided na I want to rebuild our relationship. Madalas ko na siyang sinasama sa mga lakad at pinapasyal because I want to make up for the time we lost.

But the more time I spend with her, the more I feel like I’m meeting a completely different person. Naging medyo eskandalosa siya, yung bang walang ka finesse magsalita, minsan nahihiya ako sa comments niya kapag may gatherings, lalo na kapag may food siyang hindi nagustuhan. Iluluwa niya pa kahit may nakakakita 😭 She curses a lot, speaks loudly kahit nasa mall, and sometimes, hindi rin siya mapakali kapag hindi pa siya nakakapag-yosi which is minsan nakakahiya kasi madalas kasama namin inlaws ko sa lakad.

One time, we went to a restaurant and she asked to take home the leftover bones para sa aso. I know naman na walang masama doon, pero she kept announcing it loudly, and I couldn’t help but feel embarrassed. My in-laws are very understanding and nonjudgmental, pero ako mismo nahihiya. Even sa pananamit niya, she has nice clothes pero ayaw niyang isuot kasi sayang daw. 😭

I always try to correct her calmly and respectfully, pero what really gets me is that this isn’t the mom I remember. Noong nakatira pa ako with her, she wasn’t like this. Kaya minsan, I wonder what happened to her during the years na naging distant kami. I tried to ask but she’ll just say “bakit ano bang maling ginagawa ko”
I want to spend more time with her and give her beautiful experiences, but at the same time, nahihirapan akong tanggapin yung mga changes sa kanya. I feel guilty for being embarrassed, kasi she’s my mom and I know she’s been through a lot.

Previous attempts: I honestly and calmly express my disapproval, pero lagi niyang sagot sa akin, “Ganito na talaga pag senior citizen.”
I don’t know what to do. Ayoko namang maging nonchalant sa kanya because I genuinely want to rebuild our relationship, pero ayoko rin na every time we’re together, nauubos yung energy ko and I end up feeling frustrated. How do I learn to accept her as she is without compromising my own peace?

Problem/Goal:Bilis ko kc magkasipon at lagnatin.

Context:Nung bata Pako bihira lang Ako magkasakit like 0-once a year pero ngayong teacher na Ako sa public madalas na siponin, trangkaso or lagnat parang monthly na. Hindi ko alam kun dahil madali Ako mahawa sa mga bata o dahil sa mahigit Isang oras na byahe expose sa pollution or dahil s stress sa work or dahil may allergic rhinitis Ako.

Previous attempts: tried different brands ng vitamins didn't work. Ngayon I eat fruits and vegetables mas manageable na symptoms at mabilis na Ako gumaling sa sipon at trangkaso. But I wonder if anyone here na sakitin but ngayon Hindi na. What did u do po? Ang hirap pag may sakit walang ibang magtururo..

problem/goal: 24 y/o female but still I don't have any valid IDs atm, merong jhs diploma pero nasa bodega na malayo naka store, SHS diploma naman is hindi ko pa nakukuha since meron akong need na file from JHS na need ko ibigay sa SHS pero atm hindi ko makuha dahil I still have a remaining tuition balance. ps: balak kong asikasuhin paunti-unti mga valid ids ko once makapasok ng work at makatanggap ng sweldo

the plan was supposed to be hihintayin ko lang yung father ko makuha parte niya sa pamana ng parents nila sa kanilang magkakapatid, and that's also the thing that he kept on promising me na after ng kasuhan nilang magpapamilya ipapagpatuloy niya na uli ako sa pagaaral. but alas life fucked me up and posibleng hindi na mangyari yun kaya ngayon naghahanap ako ng pwedeng mapasukan na trabaho. my bad for being 'kampante' before and also for being way too depressed and trying to stay alive to even think of trying to do anything para kumita.

right now ang naiisip ko pa lang na pwedeng pasukan is factory worker or maybe dishwasher? bpo (was planning for a non voice position) is out of the option since sobrang daming horror stories akong nababasa + need ng mga valid ids. any recos or tips for factory worker na hirings? ang iffy kasi nung mga job offers na nasa facebook kasi either puro mga abroad ang offer or mga nagamit naman ng AI sa pumbat nila, hindi ko tuloy mapagkatiwalaan na legit yung work offer.

meron ba kayong marerecommend na mga trabaho yung kahit papaano pwedeng tanggapin lang is bio data? yung around quezon city lang sana and okay lang din sa akin yung physical work.

Problem/Goal:

I want to know if valid ba yung nararamdaman ko sa situation namin ng girlfriend ko, or if I'm just being insecure and controlling. Gusto ko ng honest advice kung reasonable ba yung expectations ko sa relationship and kung paano ko dapat i-handle yung situation na ito.

Context:

Me (M) and my girlfriend have been together for 1 year na. Her birthday is on November 1, and nalaman ko na balak niyang i-invite yung isang guy na may gusto sa kanya.

The thing is, this guy KNOWS na may boyfriend yung girlfriend ko, pero he keeps messaging her and hitting on her kahit alam niyang taken siya.

I told my girlfriend na uncomfortable ako na invited siya sa birthday niya, pero ang sagot niya is friend lang daw niya yung guy, birthday niya naman daw yun, and she has the right to invite whoever she wants. She also told me na nag-set na raw siya ng boundaries with him.

Pero may mga nakita akong conversations nila, and honestly, para sa akin, masyado silang close and friendly. May heart emojis din sa messages nila. I know na hindi automatic na romantic ang heart emojis, pero considering na alam kong may gusto yung guy sa kanya, hindi talaga ako comfortable sa closeness nila.

Then, I found out na balak siyang ayain ng guy sa concert sa November 21, and silang dalawa lang ang pupunta. Nung nalaman ko ito, tinanong ko girlfriend ko kung sasama ba siya, and she said na pag-iisipan niya raw kung sasama siya.

Honestly, hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit kailangan pa niyang pag-isipan. Para sa akin, kung alam mong may gusto sa'yo yung isang guy at may boyfriend ka na, isn't it reasonable to decline an invitation na kayong dalawa lang ang pupunta, especially knowing his intentions?

Hindi naman sa pinagbabawalan ko siyang magkaroon ng guy friends. Ang issue ko is that this particular guy keeps pursuing her kahit alam niyang taken siya.

Another thing that bothers me is her phone. I asked her if I could see their conversation, pero lagi siyang tumatanggi. Kapag hinahawakan ko yung phone niya, takot na takot siya and agad niyang kinukuha pabalik bago ko pa makita kung ano yung nasa screen.

I understand na everyone deserves privacy, even in a relationship. Hindi ko rin sinasabing automatic na cheating kapag ayaw ipakita ang phone. Pero dahil sa lahat ng nangyayari, hindi ko maiwasang mag-isip kung may tinatago ba siya sa akin.

I love my girlfriend, and I don't want to accuse her of something without proof. Pero at the same time, I feel disrespected and uncomfortable sa situation. Parang hindi niya naiintindihan kung bakit ako bothered, and I feel like my concerns aren't being taken seriously.

Previous Attempts:

I already talked to her about how I feel. Sinabi ko na uncomfortable ako sa guy and sa closeness nila, especially because he keeps flirting with her despite knowing that she's in a relationship.

However, she insists na friend lang niya yung guy and that she has the right to invite him to her birthday because it's her special day. She also says na nag-set na raw siya ng boundaries with him.

Regarding the concert, hindi pa niya sinasabi na sasama siya, pero sinabi niyang pag-iisipan niya muna.

I also asked to see their conversations, but she refuses and gets very protective of her phone. I haven't gotten the reassurance I was hoping for, and honestly, this whole situation is affecting my peace of mind.

I'm willing to hear different perspectives, even if may mali rin ako sa situation. I don't want people to automatically label her a cheater or label me as toxic. I just want an honest, objective opinion from people who can look at this situation from the outside.

Thank you sa mga sasagot.

Problem/Goal: 1 year na walang trabaho boyfriend ko

Context: I just want to ask for advice because I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. My boyfriend is a Biology graduate, and he’s been unemployed for a year now. For that entire year, he’s been trying to find a job, pero lagi siyang rejected. I know he’s trying, and I feel so bad for him because I can see how difficult and discouraging it must be to keep applying and getting rejected.

Honestly, naaawa na ako sa kanya. I want to help him, but I don’t know how. I don’t know if there’s something wrong with his resume, if he’s applying for the wrong positions, or if it’s just really difficult to find a job with his degree.

I want to support him emotionally, but I also feel helpless because I don’t know what advice to give him anymore. I know being unemployed for this long can affect someone’s confidence and mental health, and I don’t want him to feel like he’s a failure.

For those who graduated with a BS Biology degree, especially those who are now working, what jobs did you apply for, and how did you eventually get hired? Are there career paths that Biology graduates can pursue that aren’t commonly talked about?
And for those who have been in a relationship with someone who’s been unemployed for a long time, how did you support your partner without making them feel pressured or inadequate?
I genuinely want to help him. I just don’t know where to start anymore.

Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.

Previous attempts:

Problem/Goal: Paano ko iha-handle yung lifestyle ng boyfriend ko habang nakatira kami sa bahay ng parents ko?

Context: Hi! F24, and my boyfriend is M23. Live-in kami ngayon dito sa bahay ng parents ko kasi dito siya nag-aaral sa province namin. Student pa siya, and allowance lang ang binibigay ng mom niya. May part-time job din siya, and minsan siya ang bumibili ng groceries. Ako naman ang nagbabayad ng electric and water bills.

Ang main concern ko talaga is yung lifestyle niya habang nandito siya sa bahay namin. Halos everyday siyang naglalaro ng Valorant, tapos puyat lagi hanggang 2–3 AM. Nagva-vape rin siya and umiinom ng alcohol. Medyo bothered na rin ang mom ko sa habits niya kasi, in a way, parang responsibility na rin namin siya since dito siya nakatira.

Honestly, super stressed na ako sa situation. Naiintindihan ko naman na bata pa kami and student pa siya, and ayoko rin namang maging controlling girlfriend na pati free time niya pinapakialaman ko. Pero at the same time, feeling ko naman, kapag nakikitira ka sa bahay ng ibang tao, dapat marunong kang makisama at maging considerate sa household.

Previous Attempt: Iniisip ko na kung paano ko siya kakausapin about this, pero hindi ko alam kung paano sisimulan nang hindi niya maramdaman na kinokontrol ko siya or pinagbabawalan ko siyang mag-enjoy. Ayoko rin namang umabot sa point na ma-stress ang mom ko sa sarili niyang bahay dahil sa lifestyle ng boyfriend ko.

What should I do? Am I being unreasonable ba na mag-expect sa kanya na maging mas responsible and considerate habang nakatira siya sa bahay ng parents ko?

Problem/Goal: Minsan po parang kinukulang pa kami sa 50k eh ang laki na yun, dalawa lang kami.

Budget: 50k pesos for 2

1. Food: 14000

2. Rent: 10000

3. Meralco: 7500

4. Grocery: 6000

5. Fun: 4000

6. Dogfood: 3000

7. Commute: 2000

8. Internet: 1500

9. Maynilad: 200

Context: We have savings, but I want to fix our budget. Busy ako at palaging OT, plus ako lang marunong mamalengke at magluto (prito lang kaya ng husband ko). Natatamad na rin ako magluto kasi picky eater siya: meat, McDo, at pizza lang gusto! Ayaw sa gulay, prutas, like pinakbet, lumpiang gulay, boiled saba/kamote etc. Nakakawalang-gana magluto kung solo lang ako kakain.

Parehas kami WFH and nightshift so di na mapababa yung kuryente namin ganyan na siya since nagstart are war. Parehas kami PC gamit.

Naiingit lang ako sa iba na ang galing magbudget.

Income ko po is 80k and asawa ko 50k

Wala pa kami kotse or bahay kaya gusto ko magsave pa lalo.

Problem/Goal: [medyo rant sorry]

i can't seem to understand why my boyfriend keeps defending his closeness with his girl best friend. when i complain na what he did made me uncomfortable and i wish to hear less about her, he'd always be like "she's so important to me" (x infinity times LMAO) "she's like a sister to me" kaya raw ganun treatment niya towards her. "she is part of the [bf's name] who loves you right now" "if we leave her out, edi some details about me would also be left out" "her friends nga from her home city knows me" haha. saying all that while i sulk kasi ilang beses na out of nowhere namemention siya. hindi lang kasi mention, laging praise laging puri. parang proud na proud siyang may sobrang ganda niyang kaibigan.

he's mad at me na nga when i bring it up kasi paulit ulit na raw. but i just want to be understood kasi he never said sorry. always so defensive.

like i want to understand how do i deal with this. he's making it seem like i hate the girl, when i have just been wondering how hard is it for him to just say sorry instead of constantly making me feel na he won't change anything about it :)

nung birthday pa niya at bumati si girl, sabi niya "ang [insert girl's home city] ng buhay ko" sa ig. i asked bakit may paganon. fineflex niya pa greeting ni girl na so sweet daw. nung time na 'yun, we were few days into the relationship pa lang so syempre sa dms lang yung greeting ko. pa-lowkey lang sa socmed haha. kaloka. sasabihin niya pa sa'kin yung IRL na kami ang magkasama, na ako naman ang pinili niyang kasama mag celebrate ng bday niya. i asked him nga bat may paganon pa siya tas sabi niya "siya lang aksi friend ko from that city". not even a sorry na i found it weird.

one of his defenses is always di siya weird for him so whats my problem. when i begged him last month na parang omg man lang u cant even say sorry. sabi niya VERBATIM "ano gusto mo? lumuhod ako sa'yo? na sorry you feel inferior kahit para sa'yo lang love ko. sorry i have a friend na kahit di kami nag uusap, namimiss ko friendship namin. sorry she's like a sister to me." LIKE ???

tapos one time na nakasalubong namin si girl from afar (for context, this was parang kakaopen up ko lang din days before how i feel about them), sinigaw pa talaga ang name at tuwang tuwa na OMG HELLO BOSS KOOOOO. ayun. "namiss ko lang friend ko. bawal ba? kung ginawa mo naman yan kay * di ako magagalit"

until last night, na super pagod na kami pareho with the topic. he was still saying pagod na siya iexplain who the girl is in his life. LIKE UGHHH in a way gets ko naman pero omfg ... i just hate hearing it. i hate hearing it again and again. i don't even know if the sorry is genuine or gusto lang niyang mag shut up na ako.

wala rin naman akong problema in the first place na friends sila. wala talaga. may jowa rin si girl. di naman siya lapit nang lapit. just felt so weird hearing again and again na miss na niya siya. jinoke ko pa nga na "edi ako mag arrange ng gala niyo" aba sabi "kaso may jowa eh. tsaka di aligned scheds". di pa naman kami nito but mind you, we were serious na ab being in a relationship at that point.

parang on one end, i am happy for him na may nahanap siyang friendships na sure siyang life long kasi nag sstruggle siya to find those types of friends before. tsaka, tropa naman sila, not like silang dalawa lang. i have those din naman? but i don't even bring them up sa convo namin kasi lowkey ano relate. nakkwento ko lang pag may nangyari like sa class or org. hindi yung out of nowhere pupuriin ang looks, sasabihin na miss na niya. amphahaha. DI KO GETS TALAGA HUHUHUHU. so many things to talk about so why would i choose to talk about another person. Tsaka! the girl isn't my friend. so when he kwentos, like ano ba kinalaman ko sa kaniya huhu. i don't even talk about people he doesn't even know.

but gets ba? when he mentions her, it's always puring puri. also, it's been weeks naman na since the last incidence. pero last night he was like "may mga bagay na nga akong di makwentong experiences sa'yo kasi ayaw mong binabanggit ko siya". para bang aberya 'tong request ko haha

Context: more context na lang siguro, besties sila for 2 years now. he said he never liked her naman. di naman sila yung nag ccross ng boundaries. di rin magkasama madalas but mainly bc their scheds dont even match haha. di rin naman naccompromise oras for the relationship. parang all is well parang wala namang kulang. di lang ako makaget over yung times na yun, and how he talks about their friendship, and how parang even in his long ass apology sbi pa rin niya "i don't get it kasi". and when i had to reiterate for the nth time, he just said sorry and sabi niya pagod na pagod na siya about the topic kasi matagal naman na siyang walang ginagawang disappointing related to that.

parang hello can you just admit what you did was weird na utusan mo ang GIRL YOU ARE PURSUING na sabihin sa girl best friend mong ulit ulit mong sinasabing super ganda bad ass smart na miss mo siya. liek can you admit na weird flexing again your closeness with a girl while your girlfriend is bawling her eyes out opening up na u embarrassed her for being clingy in public and she felt like parang mas nice ka pa with words or siguro mas ikakaproud mo pa talaga girl best friend mo.

also, one time, nag sabi ako like 8am kasi wala eh first thought in the morning. sabi ko sana di na nya imention muna kasi d pa aq maka get over how uncomfy i felt sa past instances. and all day he was just ignoring me... why? kasi hindi raw ako nag good morning and i love you. woowajkljs okay my bad. totally ignored my concern

Previous Attempts: so many. probably at least 5 times. opening it up begging for a sorry. i got the sorry na idk if that's sincere.

main advice i want to get is how do i deal with a boyfriend with a girl best friend na kahit they aren't crossing any boundaries, he is so freakin fond of her. like are my feelings valid? am i not seeing something out of this?

like i respect the friendship. pero ewan, di ko lang magets why always defensive xD "she's so special to me. but ikaw lang naman mahal ko." i dont even know how to feel. understand ko yung she is part of who he is as a person pero ewan. even typing all this is tiring.

wala rin ako ma-share-an kasi parang i dont want people to think he's the typical guy na may gbf hahaha pero maybe kasi i had a best friend who got cheated on with the guy's girl best friend so i am really never normal with this. iniisip ko minsan, does he like her? did he never like her lang because she's out of his league or kasi nagka jowa agad si girl?

please help me process this. like mas nagegets ko naman, maybe i just can't forgive him for doing those things in the first place kasi hanggang kagabi i don't think he understood it was Wrong. i think understanding niya lang is until the fact i felt uncomfortable but ifl he'd do it all over again if i was not too annoying complaining about it again and again.

and i want this to work out talaga :(( all is well eh. super well. i hate bringing up this topic pa nga but i just wanted to be understood kasi parang when he's upset parang he fails to acknowledge na he has hurt me rin naman na huhu. like looking into it long term, i'll really just have to deal with them. but ugh, even just thinking about the ccountless times of him writing a long ass message explaining how special and close they are pissed me tf off.

Problem/Goal: whiten underarms

I’ve been having dark underarms after i used veet hair removal that was around 2019 pa. Nag burn underarms ko and nangitim.

I’ve tried lots of products to make them whiten but they didn’t work na talaga. To remove my hair, I do DIY waxing.

What I do now is that I stop using deodorant everyday only if I have to go out. I also don’t do waxing anymore. I’m having my laser now sa skin station pero it’s for diode lang so hindi talaga natatamaan yung hyperpigmentation ko.

Now, na cconscious ako. Does anyone here know if celimax retinal or celimax pore dark spot brightening cream work? Or any recommendations Ty!

Problem/goal: I’ve been thinking of breaking up with my boyfriend, but I find it difficult to do so due to everything we’ve built and broke together in a relationship of 2 years.

Context: He’s my first boyfriend — my first in everything. Back then, he was a too-friendly type of guy, particularly with women. He once explained that it was because of his father’s absence in his life. I respected this side of him, but eventually I felt like he wasn’t reciprocating.

I encountered so much questionable actions that hurt and confuse me over and over again. From then on, my self-esteem went downhill. I felt like I lost so much of myself, and I had to endure changes in my life because of my mental state. In the end, he finally chose my peace over his friendships and friendliness. I won’t deny, however, that I wish he has realized and done that early.

Even though he’s changed into a better person, the pain isn’t over. Memories repeatedly haunts me. Women being around him makes me feel bitter. Even the smallest things easily makes me feel unsafe. Especially when there are some times I feel he’s too dense to realize that what he’s doing only makes me remember history.

He constantly reassures me that he’s far from that kind of person now. However, when you’ve been through so much damage and your trust was constantly broken, it is hard to rebuild everything back. I am, of course, considering that time may heal wounds. Still, there are nights I’d find myself wishing for safety and security since the beginning, which makes me question if I should hold on to hope or not.

Now, I’m struggling to decide whether I should break up with him or not.

Either way hurts. I don’t know if I only need patience since positive actions are being made now, or end everything already.

Problem/Goal: Can’t land any interviews and always ghosted on job applications though there are others who put effort in sending rejection email.

Context: My employment history is kind of complicated; I’ve worked in different fields and have a gap as well. In total, I have about 5 years of employment. I’m currently job hunting for nearly a year but I’m not getting any interviews at all. I want to stick to a particular career this time but we know that it’s impossible due to the circumstances. Most of my applications are from this position, while the others are general jobs. I’m leaning more towards creative roles because my degree, interests, and tools are aligned with the job, but my portfolio range is not that impressive at all.

I’m at the stage where I’ll take a lowball offer of ₱10,000 just to have a “job.”

Previous attempts: Already revised my resume several times, applied to non-creative and creative roles, practicing my skills, but no response from all applications

Problem/Goal: San po puwede magpaayos ng induction cooker malapit sa SM Manila?

Context: Bigla na lang nag-stop mag-work and cooker and nag-trip din yung breaker. pero okay na yung breaker. yung cooker lang hindi working. Paayos sana namin ito. San puwede na malapit sa sm manila and kaya sa budget? 4 days pa lang kami rito sa Manila and sabi ng landlord brand new lahat ng gamit kaso itong induction, may sira naman na at crack. and manufactured siya 2013 pa.

Problem/Goal: Is it possible to migrate and PR sa Australia without me doing graduate studies?

Context: So the plan is, by next year, after I graduate here in the Philippines, lilipat na ako sa Australia. The only problem is, I’m not sure if kaya ko ba mag-pursue ng graduate studies, especially since I really hate doing thesis. Is it still possible for me to find a job there and eventually get PR without having to take further studies? I also have family members living there, so I’m wondering if that could help with the process. I’m honestly still trying to figure out my options and what would be the best path for me.

Previous Attempts:0

Problem/Goal: Food business

Context:

Hello, sa mga may food business diyan pero home based lang at walang pwesto, anong preparation ang ginagawa nyo? Nag Stock lang ba kayo sa ref tapos incase may bumili saka lang lulutuin?

Halimbawa po, may nag order na isa lang, syempre hindi naman pwedeng doon ka lang magluluto tapos isa lang ang bibili diba? Parang lugi sa gas at pagod tapos 1 lang ang sales mo?

Balak ko po kasi sana mag tinda ng Chicken Pastil with Rice and Egg, paano po ba ito? Magluluto naba ng maramihang pastil (1 kilo) tapos stock nalang sa ref, parang meal prep?

If ever man na di mabili goods pa rin naman kasi pwede namin siyang kainin hehe.

Baka po ma share nyo ang preparation nyo .

Salamat po sa sasagot.

Previous Attempts: None