My husband sent me this email after having sex this morning 🤣❤️ I love him very much

Have been taking my son to soccer practice. There are 4 parents there. Most times I'm the only male parent, the others are mothers. We tend to talk about politics, current events, and issues while the kids practice. Out of these mothers, one likes to talk politics, economics and local events in the community. It's very respectful and friendly conversations.

At one of the games, after the first half, I texted my wife on her whereabouts since she wanted to attend one of the games. While waiting for the second half to begin, the lady was telling me about the daughter not able to play sports at school because of the coach. My wife walked over to us stayed behind me and I only noticed when I heard her voice.

I walked over to her and we started talking. When we got home, she accused me of cheating. She said I cheated by not telling her I spoke to that woman and my other son said i have spoken to the woman at the field during practice times too. I responded that but they were other parents there. We talked about the gas price, Argentina meet, voting and local news. It was respectful and friendly.

I said I didn't know it was an issue, it was just friendly, respectful conversation in a public place. I apologize for how me not telling made her feel but this has caused us to be distant. She said she doesn't trust me anymore. I am beyond baffled because since marriage I have never stepped out on my wife. I have been faithful and I'm confused on how me talking to a person whether male or female in a respectful way turn me to a cheater.

I'm venting because I never thought this will be an issue.

After our second child was born and we decided we were done, he told me we needed a permanent solution so he doesn't have to wear condoms forever. I said I didn't want to get my tubes tied. He said I should do it because it is an easy thing for women. I said it is usually more expensive and a more complicated process. He kept pressuring me. I said we both don't want to and I would never make you so we will just continue with birth control. 

Now he is at it again, trying to guilt me into it, saying he already had inguinal hernia surgery before and so he doesn't want another surgery. I said I understand, which is why I won't make him do something he doesn't want to do. I don't know why he won't extend me the same bodily autonomy and it kinda bothers me. 

My wife and I have been married for six years. We have two children, and until recently, I would have described our marriage as stable. We don’t have a perfect relationship, but we have always agreed on one thing: decisions that affect our household should be discussed before either of us makes them.
At least, that’s what I thought.
Three weeks ago, my younger sister called me asking for financial help. She had recently lost her job and was struggling to pay rent. I told her I would speak to my wife and see what we could do.
When I brought it up that evening, my wife said she didn’t mind helping, provided we agreed on an amount that wouldn’t affect our bills or savings.
I thought that was reasonable.
The following weekend, my family came over for dinner. During the conversation, my mother mentioned how grateful she was that we were helping my sister.
I was confused because my wife and I hadn’t agreed on a final amount yet.
Later, I discovered that my wife had privately transferred money to my sister from our joint account. It was almost three times the amount I had initially suggested, and she hadn’t told me.
When I confronted her, she said she had done it because my sister was desperate and she didn’t want her to lose her apartment.
I asked why she couldn’t have discussed it with me first.
She replied, “When it was your family who needed help, you wanted to discuss everything. I decided to help because someone needed it.”
That comment bothered me because I have never stopped her from helping her own relatives. We have always discussed large financial decisions, regardless of whose family was involved.
At dinner that evening, I made a remark about how apparently we no longer needed joint approval to spend joint money.
My wife immediately went quiet.
After my family left, she accused me of humiliating her in front of everyone. She said I could have spoken to her privately instead of making a sarcastic comment at the table.
I told her she had made a major financial decision without consulting me, and I was tired of being expected to act as though nothing had happened.
She argued that the money was going toward helping someone in need, not buying something selfish. She also pointed out that we could afford it without missing any payments.
I admitted that my sister needed help and that I was glad she wasn’t facing eviction anymore. But I still believe the way my wife handled it was wrong.
Now we’re barely speaking.
My wife says the fact that I was more concerned about getting permission than helping my sister tells her everything she needs to know about me.
I feel like she’s turning a disagreement about financial boundaries into a question of whether I care about my own family.
What makes this worse is that my sister has thanked my wife repeatedly and called her the most generous person in the family. My mother has also praised her for stepping up.
I haven’t told them about our argument because I don’t want to make my sister feel guilty for accepting help.
I love my wife, and I appreciate what she did for my sister. But I also worry about what happens if we start making significant financial decisions independently and then use good intentions to justify them.

This is going to be a long story so I apologize in advance, but I need to vent and strangers on the Internet seem like a good place to start. Also using a burner account because some of my family members know my main Reddit account.

I am the product of an affair and didn't even know until I was about 20. My mother had an affair with a firefighter while married to my father (they were still married until he died) and my father never knew about it. The firefighter (we'll call him Dave) was deeply in love with my mom and wanted to get married, so and so forth. My mom couldn't commit because she truly loved my dad and didn't want to leave him. The way she described it to me was that she was in love with both of these men, but my dad came first (except when it came to cheating but well put that aside for now...). Then she found out she was pregnant and she knew immediately that I wasn't my dad's child. Nine months later, I popped out with strikingly black hair (my dad, my siblings and my dads entire family are blonde and redheaded) and come to find out years later, my daddy is not my biological father. I never even got to know my real father because he died two years ago... as did my dad who raised me.

All of this is important because when I got married to my husband, he was the only person I told. My siblings don't even know that I am not their full sister. But my husband knows and he knows the intense trauma that came with this, the bizarre imposter syndrome that I've developed, the regret and heartache that I will never know my biological father, that my mother who I love dearly lied to not only me but my dad.

My husband knows all of this, has held me when I cried about it, and knows the impact this has had on me. ...And he still chose to cheat on me with a married woman who is now pregnant and will not be disclosing the fact that this baby is not her husband's. I feel like I am living in the Twilight Zone.

This woman is half his age, and married (supposedly happily). He met her at work. He told me she pleases him in ways I have never, that she is more beautiful than me, that her body is "fresh and supple" and he is relieved that he doesn't have to sit with her and "listen to her cry about her daddy issues". He even told me that he loves sneaking around with her and that he LOVES the idea that her husband will never know that this child is not actually his child. He takes pleasure in knowing that this secret is a "bomb waiting to detonate" and that he has "robbed another man of the pleasure of fathering a woman's first child". He intentionally did not wear condoms and would assure this woman that he had a vasectomy when she asked that he wear one... He brought her into our house and proceeded to tell me that he got off even more to the idea of "intentionally impregnating a young girl" in our bed.

I'm honestly too disturbed to detail everything he has said to me about this entire thing. I'm so numb and don't know how to feel anymore. The entire thing is just a level of psychopathy I can't comprehend. Who does something like that? Cheating is bad enough but why intentionally recreate the very secret family dynamic that almost destroyed my life? Am I really that terrible of a wife that I deserve whatever this is??

I don't even know if divorce is an option. I am 3.5 months postpartum with a baby and two toddlers, all three of which he practically demanded we have even after I said we're not financially stable enough to have them if I leave my job. I can't get by without his financially support and I think he intentionally wanted this so he could trap me...

Please, I just need some validation. Please tell me I am not crazy and that this is some crazy behavior

My (32f) husband (41m) is incredibly gifted when it comes to lovemaking and intimacy. For almost five years, he has consistently exceeded my expectations, and I feel so blessed to share this kind of love and intimacy with him.

I wish for every couple to find the same kind of intimacy and compatibility they long for, and to feel loved, desired, fulfilled, and deeply connected to their partner.

UPDATE:
Here's a little snapshot of what works for me, for those of you who asked :)

When it comes to the actual deed, he's always made it clear that he wants to prioritise my pleasure, which naturally makes me want to give as much as I receive. Neither of us has to guess what the other likes because we're pretty upfront about it.

Might not sound fancy, but I think the flirting and foreplay beforehand account for half the pleasure before anything even gets started. A lot of the pleasure comes from that playful, flirtatious dynamic between us. It's not just the physical side of things; it's the banter, the anticipation, and the mutual attraction.

his facial expressions goes a loong way, the eyes, the squinting, eyebrow elevation, suggestive smirking, just doing things around the house topless.

and ultimately, sometimes its sexy to be able to hear each other say "I love you, good night," or "good morning, this morning cuddle is nice"

and for those that still want a technical answer: he has 10% body fat :)

https://www.reddit.com/r/Marriage/s/4DK3S8DRT2

Earlier today I made post detailing my current situation with my husband and I just want to make an update post because I need to make some things clear.

Firstly, I can't thank everybody enough who took time out of their day to respond to my post. I feel incredibly validated and know I'm not crazy. The amount of support I've received is immensely overwhelming and I am so grateful. Thank you.

Secondly, I am safe. Me and my children are currently staying with my sister until I can figure some things out. After a conversation with my mom today after the post went public, I now fully intend to inform my siblings (with her 100% support) about my mom's affair and my paternity. I now understand that they have a right to know and I'm confident that their relationships with our mother are strong enough to withstand whatever past mistakes she made.

I've looked into resources and I've seen commenters talk about DARVO and my husband weaponizing my trauma. I'm still looking into these things, and yes, I will book a therapy appointment.

The common consensus seems to be that I should divorce him and tell his mistress' husband about the affair and the baby. Divorce is already a guarantee. I think I unintentionally misled people with my last paragraph about how difficult it's going to be. I was afraid and still am. But my kids come first and I can't risk my STBX being around them with this behavior. Nor can I tolerate this level of disrespect and borderline psychopathy.

I don't know whether telling her husband is a good idea or not until I feel safe enough. If I wasn't afraid of legal action in case she ever finds this post, I would share some of the insane things this woman has been texting me every hour on the hour for the past 2 or 3 days. I could probably file a police report for harassment at this point, but I'm just collecting evidence at this point.

For anyone asking if my husband was like this before: NO. This behavior came out of NOWHERE and that is partially why I am so utterly appalled by what he's done. This man has been nothing but adoring and affectionate, has taken care of me and the kids, never once threatened or laid a hand on me, was always an attentive listener, etc etc. I have ZERO idea where this is coming from.

At this point, my husband has been calling and texting me nonstop for hours, begging me to come back home and that he is terrified this will get back to his boss and he will be fired. He sent me a giant wall of text telling me that he has talked to the other woman and they've decided to propose a plan to me about the three of us living together as a throuple where she and I take care of his kids and he provides for us. How they thought this would work on me, I have no idea.

I have no words anymore. I may or may not update in the future if I have the energy but for now I just want to focus on my kids and getting my separation from this psycho. Thank you again to everybody who at least gave me the benefit of the doubt because I know all of this sounds insane and straight out of a bad movie...

My husband and I have been together 4 years, married for 1. He can’t make me orgasm and I can’t handle it anymore. I have never had to instruct someone as much as I have had to instruct my husband, and he won’t listen and do what I’m asking. He says something is wrong with my body and he’s never had an issue getting anyone else off before. I can admit I am notoriously difficult, but there have been a few guys who have succeeded. The important thing to note is with the guys who “failed” it was a one or two time thing. Not four years of sex later and they still can’t figure it out.

I have only came from hand stimulation a few times, and only prior to him. Head is usually the only thing that does it for me. He pretty much just mashes on my bean. It’s rough and hurts. I’ve told and shown him multiple times that it’s very sensitive, he needs to be slow, soft, and gentle. He is like Lenny with the mouse every time.

He won’t go down on me. In four years he’s only done it three times, and only during 69. He says his doesn’t like to go down. He won’t give an actual reason other than he doesn’t like it. So I have stopped going down on him out of spite. I feel if I don’t ever get to just lay back and enjoy neither should he.

The use of toys makes him upset, he freaks even if he finds out I used them alone. He won’t incorporate them into sex. I’ve talked about marriage counseling and sex therapy. He won’t.

So I brought up an open marriage. Well he really didn’t like that. I even said I was willing to only open it on my side to other women if that made him feel better. It didn’t. I asked about three ways. Every man’s dream right? Not mine. He wants no part.

I feel mean, but like at this point, I have tried to guide you, I have offered therapy, I have offered to open our marriage because I desperately need to feel satisfied, and you are denying all options. Either make me cum, open the marriage, or we can divorce. He says I’m being crazy and it’s not that serious. I’m like of course it’s not serious to you because you have finished every time over these four years.

My wife and I have spent the last 15 years of our marriage living close to family and friends, enjoying an amazing life, and raising our kids.

A few years ago, I accepted a job in Florida, so we moved us and the kids across the country. We had high hopes. The company was bought out and, unfortunately most of the staff was let go. For the first time in my life, I struggled to find work. I had no network and no contacts. I only looked for jobs in FL because my wife said she wasn't moving back to where we were from. It was beyond stressful. I did freelance for about a year, and then eventually just started looking for jobs where I am from. I landed an awesome job with a tech company. The income was the most I have ever made. However, my wife absolutely refused to move. She fought me daily and there was no room for discussion. It was a hard no.

I ended up having to take the job or we woulnd't be able to pay our bills. I can't force someone, even my wife, to move, so I literally moved back home by myself and just paid the bills. This lasted for 6 months. I can't believe this happened again, but the branch I was a part of was dissovled and I got laid off AGAIN. Anyway, I am back on the job hunt and I am getting interviews from where we are from again. This is because my network is there.

My wife loves Florida. I do not. I have not had a good experience here. I struggled to find a new job, we lost money on an investment property, and were hit with the two largest hurricanes in the last 100 years and sustained sooo much damage to our house (we are close to gulf).

Why is my wife doing this to me? Should I expect my wife to move with me? Am I being unreasonable? If she doesn't, what does this mean for our relationship? How should I navigate this? When I tell her she HAS to move or she will be homeless, she gets SUPER mad (prob not the best thing to say, but I'm trying to paint a picture here). This whole situation stings.

I 31F have been with my husband, 31M a total of 10 years and it has me feeling nostalgic.

One time when my husband and I first started dating we were getting it on in his college dorm. This man has me folded like a pretzel but stops suddenly mid-pump to reach for this wildflower off the side of his stand (he'd picked me some flowers earlier). He tucks the flower into the side of my ear/hair, smiles satisfyingly and then proceeds to go back to fucking my brains out.

He does cute little things that live rent free in my head sometimes.

One time when we were quite young (known each other since we were children) I was having a bout of bad luck and he proceeded to find every single four leaf clover he could across an entire lawn. He placed them in a plastic bag and gifted them to me. I still had them until recently. I think they accidentally got thrown out.

Picture of our recent stay at a cabin for our ten years together this weekend.

Would love to hear some cute little stories you guys might have that make you chuckle NSFW or not. Would feel good to hear and see some good stuff when a lot of threads can be kind of depressing.

My wife: We can be spontaneous. I mean, it's not likely, but we COULD be.

Gave me a chuckle. Married 25+ years, and I love the chill comfort we have.

Can I firstly set the scene.
So I am self employed. Had a really bad year last year, and lost a lot of money. I tried to deal with that, but it broke me mentally. I had a melt down over new year.
It took a lot of my focus, and family time away.
My wife said I wasn’t present enough at home with the kids etc.

Roll on to April, and I’m suspecting things. She seems distant, agitated easily. Not sure what she wants etc.
I end up braking her trust and privacy and go on her phone. Find loads of bad things about me to her friends, and also pictures of her in the shower, and in bed in her deleted file. She said they were all for me, no else, wanted the spark back but didn’t have the confidence to send them. There is no one else etc. Then I find pictures saying she was impressed by a🍆. Eventually she came out with it, that it was an apparent text affair.

Since then, I have tried to turn the business around on my own, and I have done, to a degree. It’s profitable, and I’m getting out of the hole i was in, slowly.
My wife is now very distant. She doesn’t hardly ever want to get close, have sex, or be intimate. We have always had a fantastic sec life so this is really not how we have been the last 15 years. She doesn’t don sexual acts anymore as apparently it’s an age thing.
She says that oh it’s always about sex. I reply with the truth. That’s it not, about being desired and wanted, close, strong and loved.

I’m not sure what to do

Husband I have been married for almost 5 years, together 7. 3 kids under 5, and 1 on the way. We of course sometimes have our problems, but I am so in love with my husband and love doing life together. Some days of course I don’t even like my husband, but choosing each other even during the boring or hard times is what makes the difference. Tonight, he was out with a friend drinking a couple beers and catching up. He said he’d be home around 11 if that was ok. I said hmm around 10:30. At 10, I texted him that I was horny, sent a sexy pic and he asked if our kids were asleep. I said yes, a few minutes later I hear our gate open and he comes right into the room to make love to me

I’m 30 and I was in a relationship with my ex for 10 years, and one thing I’ve been struggling with is the idea of getting married with someone else before I date them for another 10 years (so I could reach the same level of trust and connection). But, I don’t want to wait until I’m 40 to get married… did anybody have similar thoughts before and how did you overcome it?

Idk, for me marriage is supposed to be forever so I feel I won’t be able to do it until I cross that 10y milestone and feel this time it will last forever.

I picked my husband up from work today and when he got settled in the car he put his phone on the charger holder and I happen to look over and I see porn on his phone. For context we’ve discussed how porn is something we didn’t want to bring into our marriage but I always speculated that he was watching it anyway. I made it known that what I saw but I can’t shake off the feeling of disappointment. What’s getting me most is how the girl looked, the complete opposite of me, it seemed very specific. I’m not sure how to feel about this but I know he broke some trust in me. Watching porn when you have a perfectly good wife feels like a slap in the face.

I’m feeling pretty discouraged by my home life right now. If you have a marriage where you feel loved and have a good, healthy, mutual partnership, I’d love to hear that it exists.

My husband thought I was weird when I framed this with a couple of the rose petals. We've been married for over 23 years now ❤️

I took a vacation day today just to spend the day with my wife. I wanted her to have a good dinner where she didn't need to lift a finger. I slow cooked a pork butt, along with potatoes, carrots and onions. I shredded up half of the butt for tonight and pulled pork sandwiches tomorrow. I love cooking for this woman. It is just a simple way to show her how much that I love her.

My wife and I are expecting our first baby. She is 8 months pregnant and experiencing physical discomfort, which I completely understand and want to help with.
Recently, during an argument where she was telling me I wasn't doing enough to support her, she dropped that she’s been getting one-on-one physical stretching done by a 35-year-old male trainer at the gym.
She explained that she was trying to stretch alone at the gym when this trainer approached her and said, "You aren't doing it right, let me help you." She accepted, and it became a regular thing going on for a month. She told me that she shouldn't have to ask me to stretch with her—that I should be coming home every single day and asking her if she's ready to stretch, and because I didn't do that, she let the trainer do it.
When I found out, I put my ego aside and wanted to step up as her husband. I told her I want to take care of her, and asked her to show me the stretches so I could take over and do them for her at home instead of another guy doing them.
She immediately shut me down and refused to let me try, saying "we don't know how to do it, he does" and later saying she wouldn't do them with me because she "already did them today with him." Feeling hurt, I went to the spare room and sent her a firm, articulate text explaining why I was upset about the secrecy, weaponizing it in an argument, and shutting me out when I offered to take over.
Her reply text was just: "You are being crazy."
Shortly after, she came into the room and completely flipped her story. She told me she made the entire trainer story up, never had another guy stretch with her, and called me an "idiot" for believing her. She said I only believed it because of an old Instagram DM I sent a year ago (complimenting a female celebrity/creator), claiming she used it to test/hurt me.
She then threw my iPad onto the ground, told me I couldn't sleep in the spare room because her friends are visiting this weekend, told me I couldn't sleep in our bedroom either, and kicked me out to sleep on the futon in my home office.
I am currently sitting in my office on the futon. I feel completely mind-fucked, gaslit, and exhausted. I tried to keep my composure throughout the entire evening, didn't yell or get physical, and simply retreated to avoid further escalation.
Advice Request:
How do I handle this situation moving forward? Is this extreme emotional manipulation and volatility, or am I missing something here? How do I enforce healthy boundaries with a partner who shifts stories, insults me, and escalates to physical volatility (throwing objects) when confronted with a calm boundary?
TL;DR:
8-month pregnant wife told me she’s been doing 1-on-1 stretching with a male trainer at the gym for a month because I didn't ask her daily if she needed stretching. When I offered to learn the stretches to take over, she refused. When I set a boundary via text, she came into the room, claimed she made the entire story up to test me, called me an idiot, threw my iPad on the floor, and kicked me out to sleep on my office futon.

We were at his parents house yesterday and his sister was talking about all of her dating escapades, and I recommended MMA fighters (my husband and I are both in martial arts). Unfortunately I also had a weird situationship with a guy for a few months before I met my husband, and he was also a mixed martial artist. So, when I said “10/10 recommend MMA fighters,” my husband thought of that guy, whereas I most definitely was not thinking of that guy.

He didn’t say anything in the moment so I didn’t even know it bothered him, but when we left the house, on the way to the car, he said—“10/10 recommend, huh? Yeah I bet you really miss him.”

Despite that comment really hurting me—because the guy really sucked, like really messed me up and he knows that—I said that I wasn’t referring to him, that I meant martial artists as a whole. It didn’t matter, he didn’t respond, and he hasn’t spoken to me since. I got about two hours into his stonewalling before deciding that this was truly ridiculous, that he’s being incredibly unreasonable, and I feel so…disrespected? Like we have a one month old baby, I’m the mother of his child, I dote on our son so happily, I take care of our home, I feed us—I’m not some girl he’s dating that he can just accuse of random shit like that.

I just feel like I deserved better than that.

Am I really wrong here?

Husband and I have been together 14 years a little over a year ago I found out he is bi curious. Found out by seeing messages and photos he was sending to another man he had met on Reddit. When confronted he told me he has been curious for awhile but we've been together since highschool and he's never had the opportunity to try something else.

 I could tell by the change in his behaviour that this man made him happier. But after I found out everything he basically love bombed me and said he would stop talking to him. I said if it's something he thinks he wants to do then to go try because that's the only way your actually gonna know. After a few days he asked if he could talk with him more. 

After talking more he had explained to me that this man was also married and had never experienced anything with another man. And that their main "goal" was basically to do things together as couples not a personal relationship. This is something I was willing to try but as the months passed I noticed the messages never seem to included the wives. Its just the two of them talking I asked about adding his wife on something to get to know her  and he said his wife doesn't have socials. I've mentioned maybe a video call because they don't live close by so we can all chat and they both agree but it never happens. He will say things like oh my wife is shy.

I'm at the point where I don't think his wife even knows about this whole situation. And I've found a social account that she supposedly didn't have. They still haven't done anything physically but I feel like I should message her to see if she knows but I also don't want to destroy a marriage. I feel like I don't know what to do about anything at this point. The things I originally agreed to are changed. My husband had talked to me about if I ever wanted to be with someone or talk with someone else that I could but I don't think that's true. I can tell by jealous comments he's made that if I were to do something it would be a problem or it would hurt him. 

He acts like he's still so in love with me and he still shows up in all the right ways but I'm just confused what to do.

Should I message the account I found?

This is not your typical post because it's usually the other partner writing about people like me. But here I am. The archetype of indifference and laziness.

I have been married for a few years. I have been nothing but a child in this marriage, treating him like I treated my parents. Riding on the shoulders of those who cared about me and were responsible adults.

My husband has been dealing with stress and has been suffering all these years because he works in a very demanding field, and it's been so hard with all the pressure and financial challenges, which means he often has to take on the responsibilities of multiple people. He takes care of everything financial (I'm a full time graduate student and have a lot on my plate but I have at least triple the amount of free time compared to him). He has been worn out. I was a child in this marriage. And this isn't a new behavior. It's been like this my whole life. I was a spoiled child --> teen --> adult.

Only when he brought up how unhappy he was would I start feeling guilty and fix things for a week or so, and then fall back into my laziness (choosing to be indifferent to his pain, I guess).

It feels like I have woken up from an ugly dream where I was indifferent to his pain, but even now I don't trust myself because I have had these feelings before, where I felt extremely guilty and tried to fix things but didn't succeed.

I cook, do the laundry, dishes, and grocery shopping, and have been doing so consistently for the past few months after he had a conversation with me about how unhappy he was. Prior to that, I was still the one doing those things but expecting him to thank me at the end of each dinner and thinking I should be seen more for it. Now I do it as part of my responsibility to contribute to our shared life.

But every other problem in our life, he deals with, and I treat it with the mentality that "if it's a problem in his life, he must solve it since he knows better how to deal with it," whereas if I have a problem in my life, I know I can rely on him.

Knowing how immature I have been, it disgusts me. I know feeling guilty and repulsed like this isn't healthy. I was crying the whole day yesterday, so I guess I am really sad about what an indifferent, selfish human I have been. And how I managed to bury my good selfless part of me all these years.

He just told me that he is so burnt out that even if things work between us moving forward and I take more responsibility and care more, it might be too late. And I agree with him. He really suffered a lot.

I don't have the answer as to why these cycles happen. I wish there was someone who used to be like me but who changed for the better, permanently, so I could ask them how they did it.

I am just venting. But if you have any advice, please feel free to share.

Thanks for reading.

My husband and I have been together for 15 years, since high school. He’s generally kind and empathetic towards everyone, except apparently me.

Whenever I express negative emotions or tell him about someone treating me badly, instead of supporting me, he immediately plays devil’s advocate, criticizes my reaction, or gets irritated. It’s like my feelings are something to correct rather than understand.

He also constantly prioritizes other people’s feelings over mine. Twice he’s expected me to leave social gatherings because his friends wanted a “boys’ night.” One time he actually got angry because I didn’t leave voluntarily and apparently embarrassed his friend.

During arguments, he can become incredibly hurtful, telling me I’m incapable of doing anything and that he has to do everything himself.
The confusing part is that he can also be very loving and affectionate. He says he’s trying to change, and I suspect he might be depressed, but lately I feel like everything I do annoys him.

I know my worth, but I’m starting to wonder whether he actually respects or even likes me. Has anyone experienced something similar?

Throwaway - i resent my wife so much for how she treated me during her pregnancy. i was slapped twice during that period and once again a year after our son was born. both times, i ended up having to comfort her while she cried. everyone says it was the hormones, but till this day, ive never heard a genuine “i wasnt myself and im sorry.” If the roles were reversed and I slapped her because I had childhood trauma I would have been in jail.

throughout the pregnancy, it felt like she had carte blanche to treat me however she wanted, and i was just supposed to accept it because she was "pregnant".

sometimes i wish i could have carried our son myself. i know pregnancy and childbirth are incredible achievements and can be traumatic, but does that mean your husband becomes a second-class human being? i resent the fact that she seems to think giving birth means i should just get over everything, with no accountability or apology. 50/50 custody is so scary to me but i should have left long time ago.

What's something you wish you knew about marriage before you got married?