Nah the divorces are early to mid thirties. Im currently in this bubble. Constantly surprised by the emotional maturity and independence of single women I meet.
You can scoop up a great woman in your 30s if you’re cool with being a second husband. They’ll really appreciate you too if you’re just nice to them and do the basic things a good partner does. They’ll think you’re an angel just for saying thank you.
Dating in early thirties is AWESOME for guys in my personal experience.
There are always losers but a lot of women know what they want and know how to get it. They don’t play games and it’s just a much smoother experience communication wise than having to guess what is going on or where you stand.
Also the sex is ASTRONOMICALLY better (and frankly more frequent) than it was in my early 20’s.
I had a pretty easy time meeting people. I’m not the most attractive guy, but decent looking and I tend to be able to get along with almost anyone. I was in a long term relationship essentially my entire 20’s starting at 22 and ending when I turned 30.
My only advice for dating is fuck all the advice you might get about being some specific type of person to get women.
In my experience you get WAY better relationships out of just being yourself and being honest about it, be straightforward about what you want. Don’t be afraid to show exactly who you are. Which can be hard and scary… but you end up with way more authentic connections.
Also be honest with yourself about the women you are looking for. Try to spot the early warning signs:
Any dating profile that says “I like a man who leads..” fucking run. I’m sure there are lots of women who have this that might be great… but there are MANY who are looking simply to be pampered and see you as not much more than a means to an end. I don’t mind taking the lead once in a relationship but if they are advertising that way, that’s going to be more work than it’s worth and likely not end well.
Once again, just my opinion from my very limited experience in comparison to the grand scheme.
Nope. I’m 30sF, single, have a good job and my own place, financially stable and in-shape. I have hobbies, take care of myself, and am generally happy with my life. Some of us just haven’t met someone yet 🤷♀️ I’m ok with that
Edit: this comment is really triggering some men 😂
With all due respect, you just listed your accomplishments off like a grocery list, but those aren’t what makes a good partner, even if it makes us feel accomplished.
I AM JOKING of course. Hey I am happy about anyone that’s is happy (well… so as long as their happiness doesn’t depend on someone’s unhappiness or affliction)
Tbf the guy above said most, not all. You could be the exception in the same way you are searching for an exceptional person as well. Orrr you’re completely coping haha impossible to tell
The only reason you are happy is because you are a woman, if you were a man you’d HATE a life like that, trust me, I’m 28 and in more or less the same position and I GENUINELY hate my life and myself
Nice to hear your enjoying yourself tho
Yes, I was banned for "misogyny" for stating blatantly true facts like in my initial comment to you, so I decided to lean directly into what I've been labeled for this account.
Situation dependent. When your young and un established you can have pure connections. If that person is truly unique the odds are she will be married by the time you realize your mistake or have kids etc. Life gets more complicated as we age. You cant expect a rerun.
No, people break up and divorce all the time, it just becomes significantly more difficult to meet people in an organic way. You have to deal with apps or speed dating or other meet up social events.
It kind of feels like the world as a whole is smaller as you get older. You really have to put in effort. You have to deal with people being jaded or having baggage, thinking all the good ones are gone. A lot of people just find it easier to give up and focus on themselves. But they're still out there.
But their advice is correct, when you find a good person, be sure to appreciate them, make time for them, listen to them, talk to them, and see them. It's not enough to know they're a good person, you have to show them you know. That gets lost in the daily ins and outs of life too often.
No, they're "gone" OR have developed standards. Or careers. Or both. If you're lucky, both, plus a house, and not a huge ego about it.
There are fewer folks on the market, sure, but at 30 they are a more proven person who has MOSTLY settled into who she is going to be for the next 20-40 years. Every changes continuously, but generally more dramatically in their 20-30 stretch than their 30-40, and so on. I think this is also why many people like to date an older partner.
If you are ALSO a more proven person that is within a reasonable age range, this 30ish year old professional lady who has her shit together will likely be very sick of dating people with whom she must do the majority of the lifting in emotion, planning, communicating, and generally the WORK of a relationship.
They will value your calm, they will value your foresight, they will value that with you,, they can take a backseat and chill for awhile. They will appreciate that you are a capable, grown ass man. Because again, the bar for young men in those categories is very low, in my experience.
If you are a single man in your 30's or later, and you have NOT cultivated those qualities and a career that covers the basics plus some, trying to snag one of those women? Yeah, you're probably fucked
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u/WoodenCrow6024 13h ago edited 10h ago
Appreciate a good woman. When your young its easy to think you can always find better. By your mid to late 30s most of the great women are gone.
Thanks for the awards. Just trying to be helpful.