I have to hear some dumb, bigoted propaganda and hates when I tell her that shit gets ppl killed 😂

She literally parrots the kinda rhetoric Charlie Kirk used to say. I just don’t get how she doesn’t see how harmful it is.

My mother prolly woulda been normal if she didn’t get with her racist white husband 13 years ago. I forgave my mother for subjecting me to a man who called me the hard r 😍 but only cuz I love my mom and little sister. He will be gone before her so I’m not too pressed. Idrc how bad that sounds he put me thru hell and I don’t even hate him anymore. He just annoying cuz he’s around.

But she so annoying and childish when she has a tantrum cuz she can’t handle being wrong.

I’m genuinely nice about it too cuz she a fucking crybaby.

My brainwashed immigrant mother. She took me to USA so I wouldn’t get bullied for being mixed in school then she come to America and become white supremacy drone 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Love her to the point of tears but she so tiring.

Everyone here in Europe is so racist, and it seems like nobody speaks about it. I'm mixed race black and white, and all my male classmates are saying the N word and making monkey jokes. When I talk to them about it, they say sorry and then immediately after say it to my face.

I was born and raised in my country and speak the language perfectly.

I'm going through a lot right now. On top of that, when I wore my hair loose, two of my male classmates asked me "did a bomb explode in your hair or what?" I can't even like a boy because I feel like he'll reject me for a white girl. I've been called slurs, and when I was four I got hit by an asian kid in kindergarten and told I should go home to my own country. I had to delete TikTok because it's such a negative place for anyone who isn't white to be, as all the first comments under a POCs video will just be slurs.

One of my classmates was shouting hi to me, and suddenly some random kid from my parallel class just called me a racist word in my language and didn't say anything else. I feel so targeted at all times.

Idk if this makes much sense since English isn't my first language, but can anyone make me feel better?

I don't necessarily feel bad for myself as I know that I'm beautiful as I am and I absolutely adore dark skin (It looks so lovely), but thinking about the future of my country and all the kids and older people who experience similar things makes me feel so sad.

Any good books you would all recommend or essays etc?

Just looking to upgrade my 🧠 as a parent

For example, one person will ask what I’m mixed with and say my hair is so loose and describe me as light skinned, and then someone else will describe me as “just black” and “mono racial” and say I have “little curls”

It really has been messing with me. I see myself as Black but it makes me uncomfortable only being seen as such but the mixed category also feels really slimy and gross too. Idk I’m not really happy with anything and feel awkward about my racial identity. I find myself flip flopping internally a lot

My mom is biracial Black and white. My dad was Indigenous American with a high blood quantum. I was raised mainly by the Black side of my family but I am a recognized indigenous American as well and I have always been subjected to racism from all sides. Too white to be Black. Too Black to be Indigenous, and too brown to be white. There's never any acceptance within the mono- and biracial communities, and worse? Don't you dare date outside your color because you'll get accused of being a race traitor. I'm so sick of this mentality.

I’m not here to generalize but to illuminate my experience. I don’t want anyone to take this the wrong way. I’m at this new cafe on my college campus and I’m easily getting along with all the other ethnicities there, Mexican, White, Puerto Rican and East African. Yet, the two main African American women are giving me issues. The 1st I’ll call L, has snatched things from my hands and has told me, “Smile you look like you hate everyone here”. Than the Second one we’ll call A, overhead her say to another coworker, “Why does she act light skin”. The only reason why I’m quiting this job is bc The African American have more social power in the workplace nowadays and it would just be better if I just leave. II’ve been in similar work situations like this before, I would complain about someone behavior but if there at a higher position or more liked than me I to get side eyes for complaining especially if no one else has.

Also I think I have already complained about L,s behavior of snatching out of my hand.

-Someone who’s exhausted

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Been struggling with low self esteem for a while now which I think boils down to my mixed race identity. This has impacted my work, dating and social life. I want to get over it

I’ve already tried therapy in the past but they were all white. It becomes uncomfortable when you have to explain the root cause of your insecurity because they can’t really relate. I can’t speak my honest thoughts when I engage with them

Anyone knows a mixed-race therapist out there? This could be beneficial to a lot of ppl lurking this sub like me. Thanks

Hi everyone. Sorry if this isn’t the correct place to post this—I can take it down (or the mods can) if so. I just feel frustrated and confused about this weird phenomenon I experience semi-often.

I’m half east-asian and half white. I can never nail down how I’m actually perceived by others because I get such mixed (haha) reviews. Something I’ve noticed is that white people LOVE to tell me how white I am. It almost feels founded in malintent, but I really don’t have any evidence to prove that. I may just be insecure and reading too far into things.

The most recent example of this happened this last weekend. I was at a bachelorette party for a friend—there was 8 of us total. We had recently talked about my friend’s ex (before her now-fiancé), and how he was always really racist to me. He made racist remarks about me being asian every time I saw him, and my friend never did anything to stop it (which I have separate feelings about). My friend acknowledged this during the conversation and shared how it was really shitty of the ex.
Later that evening, I was chatting with one of the bridesmaids (white) who was in on that prior conversation. She said something about how half of the bridal party is white. I said “yeah, I guess 3/8 are haha” she looked at me and said something along the lines of “you’re probably the whitest of us here.” Like, huh? You just heard a retelling of a story about how I experienced racism a few hours ago and it was confirmed by our shared friend, just to tell me how white I am? I don’t know if I’m even allowed to say this, but it kind of felt like a micro-aggression? But like, in a very niche and targeted way towards my mixed-race identity.

Another example I can think of is something I experienced with a different white friend, who insists I look white and nothing else. Simultaneously, she tells me that her mom, who I briefly met, recently forgot my name and referred to me as “that friend, the little asian girl.” Just as a general descriptor because she didn’t remember my name. And my friend knew she was talking about me. Like, okay? So which is it? It just feels intentional. Intentionally what, I’m not entirely sure.

There have been many similar instances of this type of situation in my past. I do think that everyone operates under a different framework by which they perceive other people based on appearance. So I get that, to one person, they may see me as white based on my external presentation, and to another, they may see me as mixed. I understand that. I might view another person (if I don’t know their history) as a different ethnicity than they actually are, because presentation is not always indicative of ethnic background.

This weird phenomenon is something that has always really bugged me though, but I’ve never been able to name it or even know why it always happens every now and then. I never feel comfortable addressing it in the moment when it occurs. Even if I did, I worry I’d just come off as the “insecure wasian” stereotype.

I feel crazy most of the time, and that I feel weird about it for no good reason. Gah, anyways. Thanks for listening to my rant y’all.

Kia Ora everyone I’m from Aotearoa / New Zealand I am Māori I come from a family of 6 where we all look completely different in our family we have red hair, blonde hair, brown and black. Blue eyes, hazel, Green and Brown. Every one of us is considered Māori and belong to that ethnic group despite of difference in features or phenotypes.

We are Māori based on literal genealogy or blood quantum rather that physical appearances we have.

You can literally be half Asian, African, Latin and if you have Māori you are Māori.
✨ My question is are there other indigenous cultures who follow these rules

As a half latina half white first generation person I feel so disconnected from both halves of myself. I didn’t grow up speaking spanish at home but i also grew up knowing and experiencing that part of my culture to an extent that my white friends can’t relate to.

I’m white passing to the point that I don’t face blatant racism on a daily basis which is a huge privilege but also often feels like a way for people to dismiss my hispanic side. The microagressions and stereotypes still hurt but I feel like when I bring it up I’m written off as being ridiculous because it’s “not actual racism”.

Being around other hispanic people makes me feel like a fraud and being around white people makes me feel like I’m playing a character of myself.

I feel like I always reach a point in my friendships where white friends get comfortable enough to be casually racist. It’s incredibly disheartening and isolating but again bringing it up feels like I’m making a big deal out of nothing because I’m still half white so it shouldn’t bother me THAT much.

I could go on and on forever about the ways I’ve felt I never fit in with either side of myself but I’m sure you get the point.

I really just needed to vent and connect with others that feel the same way.

I just need to vent because I feel like an absolute shitty person all the time because of this.

For context, I'm 16(F) born and raised in New Orleans. My mom is African American raised in New Orleans. And my dad is white raised in the more rural part of Louisiana.

My entire vibe just correlates with the country life. I used to stay at his trailer time to time. I love fishing, rodeos, and just quiet. But because he’s completely moved in we never go back there anymore and feel like I have a cultural disconnect.

Today was an event for my aunt who is apart of a parade krew. If you know New Orleans culture it’s loud and high-energy but that’s what makes it distinct. Everyone was dancing and shouting. For me it was just a pure sensory overload, I needed up sitting on my phone the entire time. And all I could think about was how I could’ve been doing work.

The part that makes me feel like a horrible human is when she said “I hope you guys enjoyed yourselves that’s all I want”.

Hearing her say that made me feel guilty because all she want is family quality time. Who wouldn’t.

But it goes deeper than just being an introvert. When Im at these events and feeling so disconnected, my internal thoughts start to freak me out. Looking at everyone dancing and yelling, and the way my frustration comes off inside my own head makes me feel like I’m being racist towards my own people. It fucking sucks. Holy god, it makes me feel like a shit person. And I just wonder why I can’t fit in my own culture.

I want to be clear: I have Black friends and I love my family. I don't hate my heritage. But I am having a massive identity crisis. Because I don't vibe with the loud partying and the culture here, I feel like I'm failing at being Black, or like I'm rejecting my own community.

Feel free to respond to this any way you want. I just want another persons thoughts on this. Thanks.

Is race and ethnicity important, if so how so?

Also, obviously most of us are mixed in this subreddit, I assume, but what are our thoughts on people who say they don't date outside their race. Does it change based on the context? A white person saying they would only date a white person? A black person saying they only date a black person? What about a mixed person saying they would only date a mixed person?

Hey everyone. I am mixed race born and raised in the UK and I just want to vent about a situation that has crossed the line from standard British xenophobia into absolute unhinged absurdity.

We all know the exhausting reality of getting the usual go back to where you came from nonsense from certain local little English people. It is draining but you learn to expect it. But recently the universe decided to throw a complete curveball of hypocrisy at me.

A guy who lives two doors down who is an Eastern European immigrant decided to trespass onto my property, wreck my garden and scream at me to go back to a country I have never even visited in my entire life just because I am mixed.

The sheer staggering irony of someone who actually migrated to the UK trying to gatekeep my right to exist in my own home is wild. It is like he wanted to adopt local racism as a hobby to fit in.

To make the neighbourhood even more charming the house trapped between us is occupied by folks who regularly shout the P word and make threats about killing my entire family and others who are mixed race. Charming people who would be better off in the 1930’s in an undisclosed nation who were very annexy. So I am currently stuck in a sandwich of local extremists on one side and an immigrant doing DIY xenophobia on the other.

To top it all off the police are completely useless as usual. They are trying to claim that screaming racial slurs and threatening my family is just free speech so they are ignoring the reports. I am documenting everything for proper legal escalation because they are completely misapplying the law.

I just needed to share this with people who get it. Has anyone else experienced this specific brand of horizontal racism or had the police completely fail them when dealing with active threats? How do you even process this?

As a final cherry on top the last time I experienced this exact kind of hypocrisy it was from a European doctor while we were both working in the NHS. He flat out told me he wanted all non whites barred from London. I am so happy I was paying taxes for his wages.

Am I showing a form of intolerance by not just seeing him as a new little Englander, i genuinely think if only I could find a country that doesn’t hate me. I don’t think that exists anymore but hey at least it’s getting cold outside might slow them down.

Happy October everyone stay safe and I hope one day we build a better world, peace love and cheesecake for all

Hi everyone, I am a sociology researcher at UCSB studying the intersections of race and sexuality! I am looking to interview 10 more people who identify as both bi+ (bisexual, pansexual, queer, not straight, fluid) and mixed race (biracial, multiracial) about their experiences navigating both identities. :)

If you or someone you know is interested in participating, please fill out this brief research interest form: https://forms.gle/J2iHCfWJaDTnMYAP9

Interview participants have the option to receive a $10 gift card.

IRB approval #: 40220748

Since The posts here tend to be about negative, racist, annoying, hurtful interactions while we're just existing. Thought I'll post something funny. The title is also supposed to be funny and to weaken my stronge and honestly surprising Aversion to the word. I definitely do not want to be seen as someone who tries to dictate or criticize how a person self identifies.
If my post or comments have made it seem that way I am sorry honestly just here to support or help a person avoid the oft shitty times trying to navigate between multiple worlds/cults.
I only got love for all you mixed up bastards

Honestly being mixed has brought to light just how closed minded every racial/ethnic group can be. The world isn’t ready for us, they only become ready when enough of a certain mix becomes a large enough percentage of the population to where they can be categorized into almost a new ethnic group entirely (like Mestizos in Latin America). I’m tired of stereotypes your own people hold you to and claim that “you’re not actually _______ if you don’t do ______.” I’m tired of people boxing themselves in, I’m tired of people not being able to comprehend how someone can still occupy space within the same ethnic group even if they had a nontraditional upbringing. I’m tired of the internalized racism that people try to impose on you. I’m tired of people thinking they have a say in how you identify. All of this makes me just want to isolate and be to myself. It makes me not want to let anyone in too close anymore. Every interaction just feels superficial because everyone, even those who seem accepting and open minded always has their opinion on what I am and how I should identify. No, it’s not everyone but I’m tired of giving people chances as a whole. The world isn’t ready for us but our population is growing, hopefully in another 30 years the mixed experience will be more ubiquitous to where monoracial people know the back the hell off with the ignorant comments.

m25, half Belgian, half Rwandan.

Currently in Rwanda for the first time with my father to discover my roots. Met my lovely family a week ago. <3

Week 3 now and I've never felt as lost as I do now.

Lots of people staring at me, kids yelling 'mzungu' meaning 'white/european'. I don't speak the language except greetings, so almost no conversations can be made with anybody here.

Bonding with my father has been very nice tho.

Being mixed almost feels like having no nationality.

Where do we go from here?

Peace

So I’m mixed with Asian (THAI specifically) and Black American. My grandmother is full and my mother is biracial and both born in Thailand. They came to America and I’m the FIRST American born on mother’s side. Grew up mainly with my grandmother, translating things, helping ppl understand her accent, going to the markets, eating the food, going to temples, listening to the music, etc. I would say I’m culturally very in tuned.

So I’m at a work dinner and I have an ignorant coworker who is loud and thinks she knows every thing. Her tone is condescending the whole time and thinks she’s can speak for everyone.

We are on the convo of moving out of the city because it’s getting bad. She starts talking loudly and says her friend and his wife are moving to Thailand. I said oh nice, that will be great. I hear it’s beautiful. Then she starts to list every stereotypical thing you can imagine. “Yeah they’re going live there for 10 years and live like gods” “The kids and people there are so humble, sweet and can do no wrong”

I chimed in and said well, that’s not true. Like any country Thailand is not perfect. It’s beautiful and it’s known as a country that’s more open but it can be dangerous and ppl are not always friendly. Depending on where you go of course.

She continues to say, well that’s not what I heard. My friends WIFE(she exaggerates it loudly) is Thai. They have a house out there. So I get triggered and irritated. I said okay? I’m part Thai and my whole maternal lineage is from there. I have family STILL out there and with houses. She continues to say her friend knows a lot and his wife tells him they’re going to do great out there. I already know the dynamic of that relationship before she can even tell me how they met. It’s obvious with the way she talks. (Old white man who snagged an Asian wife trope)

I explain to her I thinks it’s stereotypical to think the place is a utopia just because many ppl are moving to the country. (Basically gentrifying it). I said some of the ppl there are classist, spoiled and colorist. Some are very racist to darker skin too. I was getting triggered at this point. She continues to say well that’s what I was told. I’m just going off of what my friend said. Then she asks have you gone or will you go? I’m already irritated as hell and I said no, I experienced too much racism. (I just said that bc I was irritated. Of course I’ll go. Why would I not?). But I did apologize and say, sorry this topic is triggering for me. A lot of ppl have an idea of what it’s like but it’s not always the case. I was just trying to shut the convo down.

She then proceeds to say, sorry that was your experience but that’s what my friend and his Thai wife told me. You know she’s from there so I’m going off what she said. At this point I stood up, said thank you for dinner I have to go. If I stayed longer I would’ve exploded, yelled or became unmannered in a restaurant setting. I was visually annoyed but it irritates me when ppl don’t get the complexity. Just because someone’s DATING an Asian person doesn’t mean they know everything. There’s layers. I may be over dramatic but I also know being around ignorance irritates me. It felt like she was diminishing me when I told her how the culture CAN be. I have family in Thailand that don’t even rock with me because I’m mixed but mainly because of my skin tone. (We know how that goes)

So, I'm embraced my heritage of being mixed race (Half white, Half Black) all my life, I love both my mother and father and embrace both of their identities and combine them together and make it my own. Everytime someone asks me what I am, I usually say Biracial or Afro-European. I used to live in southern america and they use to refer to me as mulatto, and I always liked the word as it clearly refered to me and it sounded nice. So I sometimes said that i'm mulatto when people asked.

My new school, I made a new group of friends and I refered to myself as biracial/mulatto, and I noticed they got annoyed and told me to just call myself black, but i responded with saying but i'm not only black, i'm half white and half black and they combine and make a new race. They got visibly irriated and made a few racial remarks but in a joking way like "you'd be shot down like us by the police too white people still see you as black", and then I responded saying that it doesn't change what I am.

Now I'm getting all confused lol.

My mother is white and my dad is black and I get this a lot. I used to work in a pharmacy during secondary school and one of the sales assistants said “oh yeah, it’s hard for single mothers” while staring at me, one of the girls was talking about their mother. People just assume that Black men have kids with white women and leave, and I find it disgusting.

I also saw a TikTok of a youtube thumbnail of a girl showing her boyfriend and then, supposedly nine months later, saying she was a single mum. I don’t know whether it was genuine, but it had 100k likes and comments saying “well well well”, as if one relationship proves something about an entire race.

My mum was out with my younger brother once and a man called her an “n-word-loving single mum”. She isn’t even a single mum, but even if she were, that wouldn’t justify speaking to her like that. It’s actually revolting that people see a white woman with a mixed child and think they know her entire life. I feel they do this to shame women for dating interracially, but it really doesnt do anything but show their own insecurity. Obviously this doesnt apply to every mixed person but the stereotype is just racist.

Ever since I was a kid, my mother used to tell me that if a kid had a White father and a Black mother that they had more curly hair than if they had a White mother and Black father. She said it was something to do with pregnancy or something and that those of us with Black mothers always had more curlier hair than those with White mothers. But 2 days ago while walking outside I saw a young Black mother with 2 Mulatta daughters, one daughter had dark blonde hair and one with red hair, the mother had a typical Westernised African look. The daughter had largely wavy hair, less curly than the protagonist from the Disney film "Brave".

In reality genetics are complicated and hair type is a highly polygenic complex trait, but for a long time I did also believe this as almost all other Mulattoes I had met all had Black mothers and they all had very curly hair.

For me, this also stems from a NPE and finding out about it later (and it was pretty fucking obvious, when I was a kid. I have no idea how my mum bullshitted her way out of it - to my verbally and physically abusive *not actual* dad).

I get a lot of people assuming I'm Italian or Turkish. No biggie on that. I've progressively looked more and more indecipherable the older I get though - which is wild. Teenager, I looked like a very light skinned south asian and the racism was fucking astounding. My face has continued to change, jaw bigger, skin tone got lighter - grew my curly hair out, etc...

Now, it's the flipside. I have people saying jokingly racist shit to me - without realising. It's genuinely insane. Accidentally chatting to a Reform voter that's going full spastic, is so odd. I always give a quick fuck off, but even still.

I think the weirdest side is also absolutely not fitting into any inkling of Indian culture (sans loving the food). It's weird. There's a disconnect - and also, a sense of xenophobia from those groups too.

I wouldn't say I don't fit in anywhere - I live in Central London, so it's all reductive conjecture, right now. Imagine a lot of people have similar feelings.