so, I dunno how to explain it, but I have a partner, we are in love, he is everything I needed in my life, though as we keep going futther together, the more I go on, the faster my mood swings between "yay he loves me" and "I'm so ugly he would probably leave me"

though we sort this out together and he actually helped me be a lot more confident, so the issue now is...I am feeling it within myself that I'm growing much more obsessive towards him, thinking things like, he is no one else's and that I shall always grasp on him to make sure he is not leaving me, reading his tones and everything to make sure he actually means what he is saying, this feeling of being loved so honestly is so scary to me, I think...I haven't been in love with someone as honest in a decade, so it feels like something that in a way I earned?! It's such a shocking experience, I feel like I need to protect it and become the owner of this pretty love

though I recognize that's rather creepy than lovely

I wish to bring it up to my psychiatrist, but I dunno how to word it :(

My school has a uniform, but we can wear whatever shoes we want. A lot of my classmates wear expensive sneakers, and I can’t afford to keep up.

Lately, I’ve been feeling excluded in class, and it feels like not having the “right” shoes is part of it. It’s making me self-conscious, even though I know there’s nothing wrong with wearing what I can afford.

How do I handle this when I have to see these people every day? If you’ve been through something similar, what helped?

I’d really appreciate advice from anyone who’s been through this, including people looking back on their school years. How did you deal with it, and what do you wish you’d known back then?

Today might be my worst day yet, I had severe food poisoning on top of that having a cold from the weather change and after a semi horrid day I received a message requesting saying along the line of “is this ur gf” and immediately my heart dropped I genuinely didn’t know what to do or say so before I opened it I messaged her and she told me a half baked truth saying she used to scam men for moola through Reddit which I found very funny but I really didn’t think to deeply into it at the time but when i saw that message it almost immediately made sense to me so I opened the request and i just see screenshots of my gf selling feet pics and custom pictures for moola she told me she never sent any videos or pictures but I genuinely dont know what to do or believe being lied to is like my biggest pet peeve or whatever I feel like shes not telling me everything after her saying she’s been fully transparent I remember her telling me she spent 10k of moola she’s gotten from other men before dating me im just so lost and lonely I simply need guidance and genuine help ive never been so blindsided and confused ever this is truly a first for me

'm currently in semester 4 in a very nice almost quite prestigious high school known for its amazing performing arts and sports, but I've hit a complete breaking point. My mom practically jumped through hoops to get me here, and I kinda begged to go here because of how nice it looked and the opportunities. The other highschool choice was a public highschool slightly closer to my house, where my best friends of 8 yrs, whole core friend group, crush, and classmates all went. I made the choice to come to this other highschool, but the reality is I'm miserable. The student body is packed with wealthier than average, out of touch kids who have private jetted through life and known each other since kindergarten. The 100 other girls in my year are either actively mean to me or others, or locked into tight knit groups that are hard to break into. I've been trying my hardest to make friends and fit in, but I'm just either getting bullied, isolated or feeling left out, to the point where even the great arts programms aren't worth it anymore. I deperately want to transfer to the easier, closer school where I already have a support system, but I'm terrified to tell my mom. Shes already bought this expensive uniform, paid for the arts extracurriculars, and is even planning my younger siblings futures around this location. I don't know how to kinda broach this topic with mom without a cringe cheesy sit down moment, so if you have advice for that AMAZING!!! Also I don't know when to say it. Now, Middle or end of term, holidays going into next yr when I want to transfer, with my friends around... Literally how do I pitch a transfer to a mom who sacrificied a bit to get me here and is most likely to say no?

I feel like my life just has nothing going for me right now. I’m overweight, have a gambling addiction, stuck in community college, working a job I don’t like but can’t quit right away, and have no social life because all my friends are off at college because they can actually afford it. I also can’t play sports anymore because my body is done, and football is the only thing I’ve ever known. I just don’t know what to do and where to go in life and its slowly killing me.

I don't even know where to begin. I'll try to explain as best as I can, but I'm pretty bad at this.

I have a normal life on the outside. I have friends, family; I study at university, I get good grades and TA gigs. I eat food normally. I attend to my hygiene normally. I laugh, I make others laugh.

However, internally, I can't stop thinking about how I want to die. Nothing is ever right. When I see a train go past, I can't help but think of a reality where I had stood in front of it. When I pass by the graveyard on my way home, it feels reassuring to know I'll join them one day.

It's hard to explain why I feel this way, but I guess the simplest way to get the point across is that I feel like I'm defective or made wrong. I hate having to live inside my body and feel all the emotions I feel all the time. I couldn't ever fond a normal bond with somebody. It all just feels wrong, and I can't tell you why. I want to be close, I want to show love, I want to hold everyone I love and give them everything to show them how I feel, but I can't. It's never right. It'd be weird.

And no matter how much affection I receive, I just can't ever feel loved. There's always so much doubt. No one could ever hold me. I try to keep it together as best I can every single day, but once distractions are out all I can think about is how wrong everything feels and how much I hate experiencing the world like this. I have everything. Why can't it make me happy? I don't even want more. I just want it to work with me.

I've been living like this for five years now. It's only gotten worse. I've tried therapy four times but they just can't seem to know how to help me. I explain but they don't get it. Whenever I leave a session I feel bare, humiliated and misunderstood. I get home and hurt myself by ripping out my own hair or doing things that I don't like doing like forcing myself to walk home in heavy rain, scarring my face by popping acne forcefully, etc. I've never had a good therapy experience. I don't know what to do and I'm starting to grow more fearful of myself lately.

Im trying to be the bigger person, but I dont know how to just swallow this and walk away... my life feels absolutely ruined.

My fiance of 5 years cheated on me with a 24.year old girl and gave me herpes

The psychological warfare ive endured would make anyone insane.

Please help me tell both of them how disgusting and horrible they are.

My heart hurts so badly.

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I’m fed up with everything that’s going on with AI and the current job market. I can’t stand my job, not because of the work itself but because the environment is so toxic and discouraging to work in especially for entry level folks like myself looking to gain experience. The job I do is very generalized and requires a lot of communicating with a lot of different folks.

Since my role is generalized, I was thinking of going back to school to specialize in a skill (e.g graphic designing). But with AI being used in almost every job, I’m thinking what’s the point of “specializing” anyway if someone can generate a poster/model/wireframe with AI.

I’m so frustrated on how to navigate this job market for that exact reason. I want to leave my current job but I’m not sure if I have the transferable skills required and if I do want to improve my skillset I don’t know if it’d really be worth it at this point. I feel like i’m in a constant state of freeze.

It’s gotten bad to point where I daydream giving my 2 weeks in and working at a retail job instead. Please what do I do, I’m struggling

I've never told my family about this because what would they do? I usually would pretend to joke and say "that's if Im here" when we talk about the future. Then say "I'm just kidding" to see their reaction it usually never gets one. Maybe they think I mean moving out? but... It's starting to get to a point.. I've been feeling numbness and unmotivated for the past few months. Like what's there to be here for? I suffer from social anxiety. I have no friends. No nothing. Everyone misunderstands me. No matter what I do... And I'm tired of feeling this way. I want to be normal for once. To be able to be myself.

So as the title suggests I'm worried about my mother, more specifically her health issues and the fact that she continues to eat and almot compulsively seek out unhelthy fatty stuff her doctor has told her to stop eating as often. Normally I wouldn't be to concerned about her eating habits but she's getting closer and closer to having fatty liver disease and a few other things caused by her diet.

I'm not sure what to do about it anymore because talking to her causes her to get very cagey and defensive to a point where anything i try to do or say doesn't really get through for more than like a day before she goes back to how it was before.

I apologize if this is veug in any way I'll try to clarify as much as I can with respect for my mum's privacy. My sister and I are just running out of ideas on how to help her

So I'm a picky eater if someone forces me to eat something I hate I will act like someone is trying to poison me I will close my mouth swing my arms and legs and my mom complains about me being a picky eater like for an example when my mom makes something for dinner that I don't like tonight was chicken Alfredo I used to like it 5 years ago but then I didn't like it everytime my mom makes it I tell her I don't like it she always says "yes you do" as if ive always liked it usually when I don't eat the food she tells me to starve which I never do since I just wait for her to fall asleep to eat but today she took away my tablet now the thing is I got the tablet for myself and since I'm not an adult yet there's nothing I can do the thing about this parents is that this can make a child feel trapped and helpless because they have no idea what to do so they resort to stealing, lying, and sometimes they resort to nothing if those two things fail and for some reason I got punished for something I cant control, I can't control what I like or dislike

I desperately need help after narcissistic abuse has left me unsure who to trust.
I’m incredibly isolated and can’t even leave the house without it being a huge deal.

The situation has spread to my work. My finances. My friendships (although they were thin on the ground) and the village I live in.
I need some people I can trust who understand and have really been through it. I’m not talking your ex cheated on you. I’m talking, destroyed your sanity and self esteem and then used that to evidence you were the problem, prove there was a pattern and isolate you in a way you’ve never done to anyone and share your most traumatic moments with people you don’t even know.
I’m posting this, and I’m even worried either hell see it and post a nasty comment, or one of the people involved will. That level.

I’ve been to services for support, but haven’t been able to get it.

I’m so depressed and wanna die and I’m gonna relapse on Benadryl tn I’m at boarding school and I have to wait for the package room to open then I’m gonna relapse. I plan to end my life during thanksgiving break. I’m so depressed and I want help but I can’t get kicked out of school cause that’s what happens at my school when ppl wanna die

I adopted a dog a few days ago, and I think I’m going through the “puppy blues” as I’ve seen it called online. I was so sure about this decision, I took every class, I went through a trusted rescue and found a dog that matched my needs/wants… and after four days home, I hate him.

I feel like a horrible person. He’s not even a terrible dog, just needs some patience and training, but I think I hate him. I wanted him so badly. I did everything right. I hoped and prayed and called and did what I was supposed to do! So why do I feel like this? I’ve had dogs my whole life. Since I was a child. And I always felt bonded to them right away. My last dog was a Rhodesian Ridgeback, and I had him for 14 beautiful years before he passed. I just don’t understand what’s happening with his new pup. Am I awful? Does this get better? Have others felt this way too?? What do I do??

Hi, on Saturday night I greened out for the first time. I had about half a 25mg eddie, which i normally eat abt half of a 15mg. My friend was in town for the first time so in short we just wanted to get messed up. Well i for sure did. Before we even reached the party i felt time start to lag for me. It felt like everything was moving at a lower fps. I started to have a panic attack and my friends helped calm down and get home with some food. Now it’s two days later and im still experiencing a delayed sensation to time and touch. Idk what to do.

For some more context (?), one time my friends and i accidentally took thc-p once which is like MEGA strong weed, and we were all high for like 4 days. Except that time, i didn’t green out. All i felt was tired. I was just tired for four days. So idk why this is impacting me so much.

Maybe more added context, I live in Texas, where we don’t have good regulations on this stuff. But i did buy from a store

anything helps, thank u

So I've been struggling with many mental health issues and one of the ones that upsets and stresses me the most is Executive dysfunction. As you probably know executive dysfunction is a common issue for people with ADHD, which is a learning disability I do have. Now my problem is that I'm in highschool in grade 11, and having executive dysfunction has taken a toll on my work completion process, I know I have to do work, I WANT to do it, I have the motivation to do it, I try to force myself to do it, and it feels like I can barely get anything done, it's like there is an electric wire around what I need to do, and everytime I try to do it, it doesn't let me. When I've tried to force myself in a state of executive dysfunction it doesn't work, I've tried only working in 15 to 20 minute increments and taking a 10 minute break, but that didn't work either... I've tried many things to help me overcome this, but nothing seems to be working. Now since I also have idiopathic hypersomnia, a neurological brain disorder that causes people to sleep excessively during the day without having any control over it.

I'm usually sleeping up to 70-90% of my day, which also contributes to not being able to work properly since I'm basically asleep all the time. I don't want to grow up to be a failure, I want to pass, I want to work! But everything just seems to be preventing me from doing so.

Please if you have any advice that could possibly help please reach out because that would mean a lot...

My dad who moved out about 4 months ago is moving back with us and I am struggling. When he lived away some of my family mentioned I was more happy and seemed more relaxed, and now that he's coming back soon I'm starting to panic.

When I was younger we connected more but as I grew up he started drinking and he became really agressive and just stressful to be around. He always yells at everyone, barks orders. The only time he is nice is the day after he's drunk and he is apologizing and stuff...

I've been struggling with sh since the school year started but I'm trying to stay clean. I do it when I get too overwhelmed. The problem is that my dad is the person who can make me the most overwhelmed and I dont want to sound stupid but only by barking orders to me I slightly tear up or I burst out from anger.

I don't know what to do when he moves back I don't want to cry everyday because of him. Should I go talk to my mom about it or a close friend, cause I'm terrified?

I have this thing where I have this deep attraction/fetish/fantasy for older women. Like in their 50s. I’m sure it’s tied to issues with my mom or whatever but it continues to ruin my life.

It’s frustrating because it’s reciprocated in secret back at me. I had a boss (woman in her 50s) who made several passes at me and when I finally tried to reciprocate she had me fired and falsely accused me of sexual harrasment. I lost numerous other job opportunities and even friendships behind that accusation. I couldn’t even work in the city I lived in at the time in my industry it was damning.

One time I went to Vegas years ago and ended up connecting with this older married woman in a matter of hours and we kissed briefly but we trauma bonded so damn hard I think about her to this day.

So now I’m in a new state, married, with a kid. And sure enough again I befriend an older woman (60s). We start talking and connect over our mental health issues and unhappiness with our partners and something in me activates like a dumbass and I’m OVERCOME with desire.

I tell her I’m attracted to her and that I want to kiss her. We hug for a long moment then go back to our workday. This morning I go to our usual spot and she gives me the “let’s stay professional” talk and says we can’t talk anymore and she won’t tell our boss as long as I give her space.

I’m so fucking stupid. I keep sabatoging my own life. And for what? I want to deeply connect with someone so bad but for some reason I want it included in some weird secret sexual tryst with a woman old enough to be my mother. Is that a kink? Just trauma? I don’t know. But I almost cheated on my wife who is nothing but good to me (but doesn’t always understand my suicidal thoughts, depression, and anxiety the way I thought she did).

I feel so fucking alone and disgusting and foolish and weird. From the outset people see me and think I have it all together. Good family, good job, attractive, etc.

And I still feel like a child. I just want to cry all the time, but I can’t. Like I’ve tried. I don’t know if I’m just too disassociated as a person or what. I just want someone to hold me and tell me I’m ok and everything’s going to be ok. The need is so deep it makes me sick of myself.

This time I narrowly dodged a bullet, but it seems almost ingrained in me to be inappropriate.

I am making this post in hopes to connect with people with similar or the same issues..

I have OCD, I get intrusive thoughts that I won't go into detail describing, but I loathe them.. They are truly disgusting, having these thoughts makes me feel just as disgusting about myself as the thoughts are. I do not want them and I do not agree with what they are on any level whatsoever. I cannot stop them and it's so crippling at times.. I feel so disgusting..

Does anyone else struggle with this kind of thing? How do you cope with this?
Any advice will be greatly appreciated.

So idk, i feel guilty? Hi im a 19female college student and we have an incident happened in pe, my classmate/acquaintance? Or friend? Is having like an asthma attack or hard breathing?

I know you mostly have to stay calm but she was asking for a paper bag or plastic, she doesn't have an inhaler? She never informed us about her having any health issues? Or idk. I was holding her and she was crouched on the ground trying to breathe, i try to call out for people to get or if they have anything she use to like pump, most of the boys just sat there not moving and then i went with second call for someone to carry her it took them litteral idk how many minutes but finally took her when she fucking passed out.

She's alright now, but looking back to it why does it feel like i was the one in the wrong, i hear a guy saying that we should have not surround her or anything or could have not panicked?

I feel like he was targeting that sentence to me, i was screaming, heck im even sick i have cough and my throat hurts but i scream to catch attention to help her, but idk anymore i just need help, i was thinking of apologizing to the girl for panicking or idk...

That was my first time experiencing an event like that...my class consist of 10 girls and 35 fucking boys, so i don't know anymore...

Just like the title says, I’m fed up, and I hope not to see him for the next few years. Has he done anything specific to hurt me and bring things to this point? Not really—or well, I don’t know if that was his intention. I’m four years older than my brother—I’m the oldest. I was told I was mean to my brother when he was a baby—pinching him or hitting him. There was a time when I’d push him down the stairs at home and just laugh. I don’t think of myself as a psychopath, because I’m capable of feeling emotions. My brother, on the other hand, has always been quite affectionate and loving, giving hugs or kisses on the cheek. I eventually stopped the aggressive behavior when I got a cell phone. He entered adolescence and is still just as affectionate; however, I don’t like physical contact, so I avoid letting him hug me at all costs. In the past, I was abused by a family member; I was young and didn’t understand what was happening. That led to a cycle where I ended up touching my brother—luckily, those instances were very few and far between. Eventually, my parents found out and took both of us to see a psychologist separately. I was a teenager when the pandemic hit, and I was living with my brother, but the abuse led to physical distancing (as I mentioned earlier). He started middle school and entered his teenage years; that’s when the rude behavior began—complaining when asked to do something, yelling, punching the wall (he’d actually always had anger outbursts, a trait he inherited from my dad), and hitting me. These days, although that behavior has lessened, he does get upset if something doesn’t go his way; he makes a lot of annoyed and displeased faces. These interactions have been so frequent and constant that, since the beginning of the year, my feelings of contempt toward him have grown. I’ve had violent thoughts in which I ended up stabbing him with a knife or hitting him in the head.I forgot to mention that two and a half months ago I was diagnosed with depression; I don’t know if that could be a factor, in addition to the suicidal thoughts and the fact that, 20 days ago, I shouldn’t even be alive. I’m sorry if this is confusing—I think you can tell it’s late, and I just want to vent because my next session with my therapist isn’t for a few days. I’m sorry if it’s hard to understand at times—I’m using a translator. I’m open to hearing your opinions. Thanks for reading.

not about suicide/sh but its mentioned soooo idk being precautious

I just can’t let myself believe that people care about me and it hurts really bad when they show that they do. I feel the best and idk? safest? when i think people don’t care about me so when they start REALLLYYY showing they do it ends badly for me.

My friends say they love and care about me all the time, they check up on me, regularly ask to hang out, make sure i’m doing okay, normal friend things, etc. and it feels great for a second but i tell myself it’s obligatory and they don’t really mean any of it. I feel so worthless so why would they care.
I know that they do but idk i just can’t accept it.

I (obviously) struggle with my mental health and
most of my friends do as well. We’re all very open to each other and encourage talking to each other to get shit off of our chests but i never talk about anything serious or anything that’s ACTUALLY bugging me because i think they won’t care (EVEN THOUGH THEY HAVE MADE IT VERY CLEAR THEY ALL DO) and i feel self centered, narcissistic, and extremelyyyy selfish. Deep down i know they care and they really want me to talk about what’s upsetting me and i do want to talk about it but the second i work up the courage i start heaving and never end up saying anything.

My best friend will do the stupidest most simple things ever and i’ll start crying.
They made a doodle of us as cats earlier.
and i sobbed because they thought of me for a SECOND and decided to draw us and send it to me.
it makes me nauseous and more often than not i go into a brief period of being suicidal because it feels overwhelming and usually ill end up hurting myself.

it means the world to me don’t get me wrong-
but it hurts so bad
immediately after they do something to show they care i feel guilty for doubting them
and then the guilt spirals back into self hatred which brings my self esteem back down
and then im suicidal again and i isolate.

I would also like to clarify that they have never made me feel bad in any way or given me an actual reason to doubt they care about me this is just how i am unfortunately.

sorry if this makes no sense im still frazzled from the drawing thing and its nearly 3am. i’ll probably come back later and edit it a bit so its less confusing if needed.

I am a 36M autistic turning 37 this Saturday. This year has been by far the worst year of my whole life, and the stress and depression is unbearable.

This week I did light SH to my arm, and I feel like life is spiralling out of control. Not sure what to do in this situation. I truly do not want this birthday, but it is coming up very quickly.

I'm a female muslim my family isn't those "girls belong in kitchen"type. They want me to have my full education and now I'm doing my last year of highschool. My goal after that is to go to aviation uni but they didn't approve of it cuz I'm a girl and it would be hard for me . I get what they mean but it's still not a reason so I need your help to convince my fathers

My mom has already accepted but the man is the problem

I'm having to move out of my home with no notice because of a domestic altercation with my father. I'm 24. I'm autistic and chronically ill. I have a place to go but I'm so scared. I don't do well with change. There's so much to work out with transferring my care and my meds. I've tried to move out before to go to college and despite the fact that I wasn't even happy at home, the homesickness was so agonizing I was having breakdowns several times a day and couldn't take care of myself.

I have a good support system where I'm going. I'm lucky I do have somewhere to go and that it's with a loved one. But even if this isn't true, I feel like I'll never be okay again right now. How long does it take for a new place to feel like home? How do I cope with the fact that I've lost my childhood home and all my familiar surroundings in what feels like an instant? I'm going to miss my mom and my bedroom and the bathroom I'm used to so bad.

I'm sorry in advance if it takes me a while to get back to anyone who comments after I go to bed. I have a lot to do over the coming days and sometimes I get nervous to check Reddit for a while for irrational anxiety reasons. I still appreciate you for reading and I will appreciate any support or advice I get even if I'm not in a place to respond right away.