Hi, on Saturday night I greened out for the first time. I had about half a 25mg eddie, which i normally eat abt half of a 15mg. My friend was in town for the first time so in short we just wanted to get messed up. Well i for sure did. Before we even reached the party i felt time start to lag for me. It felt like everything was moving at a lower fps. I started to have a panic attack and my friends helped calm down and get home with some food. Now it’s two days later and im still experiencing a delayed sensation to time and touch. Idk what to do.

For some more context (?), one time my friends and i accidentally took thc-p once which is like MEGA strong weed, and we were all high for like 4 days. Except that time, i didn’t green out. All i felt was tired. I was just tired for four days. So idk why this is impacting me so much.

Maybe more added context, I live in Texas, where we don’t have good regulations on this stuff. But i did buy from a store

anything helps, thank u

I desperately need help after narcissistic abuse has left me unsure who to trust.
I’m incredibly isolated and can’t even leave the house without it being a huge deal.

The situation has spread to my work. My finances. My friendships (although they were thin on the ground) and the village I live in.
I need some people I can trust who understand and have really been through it. I’m not talking your ex cheated on you. I’m talking, destroyed your sanity and self esteem and then used that to evidence you were the problem, prove there was a pattern and isolate you in a way you’ve never done to anyone and share your most traumatic moments with people you don’t even know.
I’m posting this, and I’m even worried either hell see it and post a nasty comment, or one of the people involved will. That level.

I’ve been to services for support, but haven’t been able to get it.

I’m so depressed and wanna die and I’m gonna relapse on Benadryl tn I’m at boarding school and I have to wait for the package room to open then I’m gonna relapse. I plan to end my life during thanksgiving break. I’m so depressed and I want help but I can’t get kicked out of school cause that’s what happens at my school when ppl wanna die

I have this thing where I have this deep attraction/fetish/fantasy for older women. Like in their 50s. I’m sure it’s tied to issues with my mom or whatever but it continues to ruin my life.

It’s frustrating because it’s reciprocated in secret back at me. I had a boss (woman in her 50s) who made several passes at me and when I finally tried to reciprocate she had me fired and falsely accused me of sexual harrasment. I lost numerous other job opportunities and even friendships behind that accusation. I couldn’t even work in the city I lived in at the time in my industry it was damning.

One time I went to Vegas years ago and ended up connecting with this older married woman in a matter of hours and we kissed briefly but we trauma bonded so damn hard I think about her to this day.

So now I’m in a new state, married, with a kid. And sure enough again I befriend an older woman (60s). We start talking and connect over our mental health issues and unhappiness with our partners and something in me activates like a dumbass and I’m OVERCOME with desire.

I tell her I’m attracted to her and that I want to kiss her. We hug for a long moment then go back to our workday. This morning I go to our usual spot and she gives me the “let’s stay professional” talk and says we can’t talk anymore and she won’t tell our boss as long as I give her space.

I’m so fucking stupid. I keep sabatoging my own life. And for what? I want to deeply connect with someone so bad but for some reason I want it included in some weird secret sexual tryst with a woman old enough to be my mother. Is that a kink? Just trauma? I don’t know. But I almost cheated on my wife who is nothing but good to me (but doesn’t always understand my suicidal thoughts, depression, and anxiety the way I thought she did).

I feel so fucking alone and disgusting and foolish and weird. From the outset people see me and think I have it all together. Good family, good job, attractive, etc.

And I still feel like a child. I just want to cry all the time, but I can’t. Like I’ve tried. I don’t know if I’m just too disassociated as a person or what. I just want someone to hold me and tell me I’m ok and everything’s going to be ok. The need is so deep it makes me sick of myself.

This time I narrowly dodged a bullet, but it seems almost ingrained in me to be inappropriate.

So idk, i feel guilty? Hi im a 19female college student and we have an incident happened in pe, my classmate/acquaintance? Or friend? Is having like an asthma attack or hard breathing?

I know you mostly have to stay calm but she was asking for a paper bag or plastic, she doesn't have an inhaler? She never informed us about her having any health issues? Or idk. I was holding her and she was crouched on the ground trying to breathe, i try to call out for people to get or if they have anything she use to like pump, most of the boys just sat there not moving and then i went with second call for someone to carry her it took them litteral idk how many minutes but finally took her when she fucking passed out.

She's alright now, but looking back to it why does it feel like i was the one in the wrong, i hear a guy saying that we should have not surround her or anything or could have not panicked?

I feel like he was targeting that sentence to me, i was screaming, heck im even sick i have cough and my throat hurts but i scream to catch attention to help her, but idk anymore i just need help, i was thinking of apologizing to the girl for panicking or idk...

That was my first time experiencing an event like that...my class consist of 10 girls and 35 fucking boys, so i don't know anymore...

not about suicide/sh but its mentioned soooo idk being precautious

I just can’t let myself believe that people care about me and it hurts really bad when they show that they do. I feel the best and idk? safest? when i think people don’t care about me so when they start REALLLYYY showing they do it ends badly for me.

My friends say they love and care about me all the time, they check up on me, regularly ask to hang out, make sure i’m doing okay, normal friend things, etc. and it feels great for a second but i tell myself it’s obligatory and they don’t really mean any of it. I feel so worthless so why would they care.
I know that they do but idk i just can’t accept it.

I (obviously) struggle with my mental health and
most of my friends do as well. We’re all very open to each other and encourage talking to each other to get shit off of our chests but i never talk about anything serious or anything that’s ACTUALLY bugging me because i think they won’t care (EVEN THOUGH THEY HAVE MADE IT VERY CLEAR THEY ALL DO) and i feel self centered, narcissistic, and extremelyyyy selfish. Deep down i know they care and they really want me to talk about what’s upsetting me and i do want to talk about it but the second i work up the courage i start heaving and never end up saying anything.

My best friend will do the stupidest most simple things ever and i’ll start crying.
They made a doodle of us as cats earlier.
and i sobbed because they thought of me for a SECOND and decided to draw us and send it to me.
it makes me nauseous and more often than not i go into a brief period of being suicidal because it feels overwhelming and usually ill end up hurting myself.

it means the world to me don’t get me wrong-
but it hurts so bad
immediately after they do something to show they care i feel guilty for doubting them
and then the guilt spirals back into self hatred which brings my self esteem back down
and then im suicidal again and i isolate.

I would also like to clarify that they have never made me feel bad in any way or given me an actual reason to doubt they care about me this is just how i am unfortunately.

sorry if this makes no sense im still frazzled from the drawing thing and its nearly 3am. i’ll probably come back later and edit it a bit so its less confusing if needed.

I am a 36M autistic turning 37 this Saturday. This year has been by far the worst year of my whole life, and the stress and depression is unbearable.

This week I did light SH to my arm, and I feel like life is spiralling out of control. Not sure what to do in this situation. I truly do not want this birthday, but it is coming up very quickly.

I'm a female muslim my family isn't those "girls belong in kitchen"type. They want me to have my full education and now I'm doing my last year of highschool. My goal after that is to go to aviation uni but they didn't approve of it cuz I'm a girl and it would be hard for me . I get what they mean but it's still not a reason so I need your help to convince my fathers

My mom has already accepted but the man is the problem

So I'm a picky eater if someone forces me to eat something I hate I will act like someone is trying to poison me I will close my mouth swing my arms and legs and my mom complains about me being a picky eater like for an example when my mom makes something for dinner that I don't like tonight was chicken Alfredo I used to like it 5 years ago but then I didn't like it everytime my mom makes it I tell her I don't like it she always says "yes you do" as if ive always liked it usually when I don't eat the food she tells me to starve which I never do since I just wait for her to fall asleep to eat but today she took away my tablet now the thing is I got the tablet for myself and since I'm not an adult yet there's nothing I can do the thing about this parents is that this can make a child feel trapped and helpless because they have no idea what to do so they resort to stealing, lying, and sometimes they resort to nothing if those two things fail and for some reason I got punished for something I cant control, I can't control what I like or dislike

Ive had the worst ex ever but I cant stop thinking about her. I fall in love so hard everything why cant I find someone thats the same way that will love me forever. Theres more to my situation but this subreddit wont let me say it but I need help and nobody can help and im doing to ðįę alone within a few months and I have nothing to show for my life. I don't want to be alone but I habe nobody that cares till im gone thats when everyone will wonder how they could have done somthing