I wrote this for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, but I didn’t have the courage to share it then. Today, it feels right to finally do so, because I’m missing my daughter a little extra. 🤍🕊️

“When you have a child, you finally get to see what your heart looks like. It’s hard when your heart dies before you.” This line from Fairly Legal has stayed with me, especially as we remember our little angel, Siobhan, on Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

I’m sharing this to honour our daughter, to let the world know that she existed, that she was here, and how proud we are of her. She may not have had the chance to grow up in our arms, but she will always have a place in our hearts.

We miss the beautiful face we adored and the tiny hands that will forever hold our hearts. We may never hear her laugh or cry, but her heartbeat and little movements will always be some of the most beautiful things we’ve ever experienced. Holding her in my arms was pure magic. I never knew a love like that could exist until I saw her.

As John Green wrote in Hollywood Ending, “The dead are not in the past, not really, because you carry them around with you.”

And we will, Siobhan. In the love you left behind, in the little moments that remind us of you, and in the life we continue to live. You existed. You mattered. You are loved beyond words, and we will always be proud to be your parents. 🤍

If you’re able, please light a candle for our Siobhan and for all the little angels who left this world too soon. May their lives, no matter how brief, never be forgotten. 🕯️🤍

I lost my baby girl 2 weeks ago, at 29 weeks. She was born alive but passed away after 26 hours. She was perfect. She looked just like her older sister. It's been two weeks and I have tried to deny that I lost a daughter this whole time. I was grieving what could have been. I was grieving for a future I had imagined. But today, reality hit me. I lost my daughter. She had a name. My kids lost a sibling. This pain is just too much. I feel as if my heart will explode. Will it ever get better? If I have another baby, it wouldn't ever replace her, so how will it get better?

We had our loss at 31 weeks in September. Im 90% sure I've gotten my period, gnarly cramps and all. I will also say I was on birth control for a long time and had my IUD removed before our son was conceived. So I only had two "normal" periods before getting pregnant, I had periods on bc but they didn't hurt as bad weren't very heavy etc.

My periods before bc were always heavy and painful. Those first two this year were absolutely so. But my periods were still 3-4 days.

I had post partum bleeding for 4ish to 5 weeks, I stopped bleeding completely for a few days maybe even about a weekish with light spotting to none at all. I can't remember exactly. Then around the end of last week I started bleeding again, but it felt slightly different and then one night the cramps were horrid. Like my menstrual cramps are. It felt and still does feel like a period. I get my IUD in tomorrow.

So my question is mostly like how long were your first periods, was your cramping worse than before or about the same, etc? How could you tell it was your period and not the lochia bleeding.

I feel so much guilt. I feel like it is all my fault but also angry, because I know other people have done worse and they get to hold their healthy babies.

I feel guilty for having a small glass of wine 2 w before I lost my baby girl. I feel guilty for being so worried for what my life would look like after having her. Now she is gone, I can have all of it back, but I don't want it.

It's going to be a LONG one, but I think I'm ready to share my story in hopes that it may connect with someone else (or even help me heal).

3 weeks ago I had a miscarriage at 16wks due to placental abruption.

A week before my miscarriage my husband is out of town and I start having some odd symptoms, but no fever or spotting. Yet I still feel like something is wrong. Friday morning, the symptoms start to pick up with a bit of cramping and I finally cave and have my husband take me to our OB and they do a full work up. Ultrasound looks good, urine is good just dehydrated, but WBC was at 16 which was on the cusp but with no other symptoms so they weren't sure if it was the start or end of something - they schedule me for a F/U the following Thursday and tell me to go into the ER if anything changes. Things subside and by Sunday it seems we are out of the woods. Since I'm feeling better and have missed my husband the past week, we have intercourse and all seems well.

Monday morning comes and there is some pink/light red spotting - we just had sex the night before and spotting is common so I wasn't too panicked. Tuesday comes and its not really lightening up and seems to be pretty mucus-y (like more than just semen lol) but thankfully I have an OB appt same day so we chat I fill her in on everything, I hear baby's heartbeat on the doppler, she does a cervical exam to confirm nice closed cervix agrees it's a little more mucus than usual but not uncommon and she takes a sample to run a culture test that will take a day or 2.

Wednesday morning I go to work and things just start to go downhill. The bleeding and cramping/pain pick up and I call the OB and they say I probably just have a friable cervix and if the cramping becomes unbearable to come in (I have no idea what that means or what the threshold is) but by 2pm it becomes unbearable and uncomfortable for me to be at work as the cramping starts to intensify so I go home. The cramping turns to timed 5 min contractions that I try to fight off for an hour and it finally hits me when I'm leaned over my bed sobbing that I might be in labor. I hobble to the bathroom thinking it might help and of course i think i have to "poop" so I push and the entire sac with my 16wk baby AND the placenta drop into my toilet. I start sobbing hysterically and I call my husband at work and he races home. We go to the ER I tell them I delivered everything at home like there's nothing left but maybe some tissue in my uterus (they seem skeptical this happened but finally believe me after the ultrasound). All things considered, uterus and bleeding look good but they confirm that I have a double infection of both a UTI and BV. At this point we assume this is the cause of the complete miscarriage and we both heavily grieve and start to blame ourselves for not going in sooner.

I schedule a F/U with OB on Monday. We go to my appt on Monday at this point just hoping for some answers and good news that I can conceive again. After review, my OB gives her medical opinion that neither infections were the cause and thinks the cause of the miscarriage a placental abruption (hence why EVERYTHING came out in one go). We can try again as soon as we're ready and there should be no reason why I can't have another healthy pregnancy as most women conceive within 3 months and have healthy pregnancies.

It's all just been something I never could have prepared myself for or even thought would happen to us (naive, I know) and just having to deal with both the mental AND physical trauma have been a struggle. Part of me is still guilty because it has been a hard pregnancy, but of course I still wanted my baby and should have just been grateful.

I'm at the point where I feel empty and all I want is to be pregnant again, even though it won't replace my baby boy. I'm so anxious and worried that I won't be able to conceive as easily as I did before and feel like time is my enemy and I'm starting to obsess over making my body heal and getting my period as soon as possible.

Hi everyone,

I’m 27 and feeling completely heartbroken right now.
I’ve been pregnant twice before, but neither pregnancy resulted in a living child. Both pregnancies were unplanned, so I never imagined that trying to conceive would become another difficult and stressful journey.

I lost my son at 34 weeks in August, and I’m already struggling so much with that loss. I am completely healthy and had a healthy pregnancy and baby, the loss was caused by a cord accident.

All I want is a little hope for a better future. But now it feels like I have to go through yet another obstacle: tracking ovulation, taking tests, trying to time everything perfectly, waiting two weeks, analysing every little symptom and then potentially facing another disappointment.

I honestly don’t know if I have the energy for this. I just wish something could be easy for once.
I’m also struggling with the timing. I really don’t want my next pregnancy to overlap with the same months as my previous pregnancy. I gave birth in August, the month my son was stillborn, and I desperately hope to have a baby before the month I was originally due in September next year. Right now, that hope feels further away than I imagined.

I think I ovulated around October 9–10, although I’m not certain. We had sex during the fertile window, but my Clearblue Early Detection Digital test this morning (October 21) said not pregnant. 💔

Has anyone had a negative digital test around 10–12 DPO and later gotten a positive?

I know one cycle doesn’t mean anything about the future, but right now I’m just exhausted, sad and scared that even this is going to be a long and difficult road.

I would really appreciate hearing from anyone who has been through something similar.

After delivery of my angel baby Nolan, the nurses had confirmed that I was RH neg while he was RH positive. I needed a really high dose of rhogam post partum. However, many hours later, a doctor came in and said that he will give me a single injection and that will be it. Surprised, but also relieved, I got the injection and we checked out soon after.

The next day I got a call from my OB saying that they got more test results back and said that I need to come in right away for a rhogam infusion. Apparently I needed 11 more doses. So I came in this morning to do it right away.

My nurse was very kind and answered any questions I had. The most nagging one was why I only got a single dose in the hospital. She mentioned that there was a specific test that got processed after I left and updated how many I needed.

I got started with the iv infusion of the rhogam and I felt great. She also had antihistamines just in case I had an allergic reaction. In the end I felt fine, but she wanted me there for another hour for observation

She started an IV fluid and soon after I started to get some chills. The chills became so bad that I started to turn blue. I also had to go to the bathroom and I couldn’t barely even stand because my back was screaming from pain. My back pain became worse and worse everyday since the birth, but that was a 10/10 pain. I had to be wheeled to the bathroom while uncontrollably shivering and crying. It was torture.

After the bathroom, I was put back on the gurney and had 8 heated blankets on me which did nothing. Originally, she thought I was shivering from the IV fluids, but after hearing about the back pain, I ended up having a reaction to the rhogam. So I got the antihistamin. 30 minutes and I finally stopped shivering. I had to stay another 2 hours for observation.

The nurse was very kind and helpful to me, and probably saved my life. But I don’t have hope anymore. I’m also considered high risk now.

After 72 hours of labor, failed epidural, 3 1/2 hours of pushing, being denied for donating milk at the hospital, and now this, I really feel exhausted. Maybe I’m not meant to have a baby. Now I’m sitting here crying with back pain still and barely moving. I feel that I completely destroyed my body for nothing. I don’t know. I feel like I’m cursed to live as someone who can’t be an official mom now.

My labor and postpartum experience has been hell, and I only got discharged three days ago.

What would you suggest?

Anyone here experience maternal vascular malperfusion? I lost my son at 21 weeks and pathology findings reported that there was severe MVM. Will a reproductive immunologist be able to help with a subsequent pregnancy? I have had a thrombophilia panel done in the past and it came back as normal. I am feeling clueless and honestly overwhelmed.

Hello everyone. I had my baby boy Jonas on [2026 06 24](tel:2026 06 24), but he died at [2026 08 21](tel:2026 08 21), not even two months old (born with congenital heart defect, had surgery, recovered well, but suddenly had a heart attack and that was it… ) . And i am pregnant again. (that would be only 4months post partum 🫣 ) We really wanted to try again, but not so soon. Though my birth was really easy and i feel great physically, but still very nervous about upcoming pregnancy, very anxious about all the feelings emotionally and how my body will hold after such short time…. has any of you had similar experience?

Recently had a 16 week complete miscarriage at home. I know grief comes in waves and some days I can function and others I'm crying hysterically.

I had 2 weeks of hell knowing deep down something was wrong yet trying to make it through because baby boy was fine (multiple dr visits). Only for everything to turn bad in 24hrs and end with the loss of my baby.

I don't know if anyone can or does prepare for this, but why I thought I was strong enough to get through this is beyond me. Between dealing with the overall loss of my baby, the psychological trauma of delivering my baby in the bathroom, the guilt of struggling & complaining about how difficult this pregnancy has been, to just the gestation I lost my baby at, I am DROWNING an ocean of never ending emotions and grief. Do I let it consume me? Do I try to pretend the past 3 months didn't happen?

I went to a pregnancy loss support group last week, but I was the only one who attended (along with the facilitators) and I don't know that it gave me the support I needed. I guess I could have trauma dumped, but I'm already such and introvert it was mostly them talking and me stuck in my own head. I'm at the point now where I am so frustrated with my body and just want to heal so I can try again as soon as possible because while I know it won't bring the baby I lost back, my body just feels so empty. I can hope that I can still have healthy pregnancies and conceive easily, but I know any pregnancy after will come with it's own lovely basket of emotions and stress.

How do we move on and heal from a miscarriage at ANY gestation? How do we have hope we'll get our rainbow baby soon enough? Anything to make me feel less alone would help, because deep down I know I'm not alone and this too shall pass (eventually?).

Hey, I loss my child day after deadline (40+1) cause of a doctor mistake.

Afterwards 1 year trying to convive again, and loss at 8 weeks, and 2 chemical pragnancy (before week 5, but aboyt 4+3 and 4+4).

Im 34 years old. Before my first pragnancy with the baby we loss before birth, I have never ben pregnant before.

Anyone tried something like that and got pregnant? I have been scanned and there is nothing to see.

Maybee someone tried something and that worked? Or the body just stumbled at the beginning?