Hi! I am a younger girl and about a year ago my family and I moved (Not really under my will) To Wisconsin from Utah, i grew up in Utah and all of my closest friends are there.

Recently my friend (Lets call her Leah) Has started texting weirdly and very out of character for her, she has been caught several times making small, honestly compleatly dumb lies that would have made no difference if she told the truth. No one in our friend group has personaly called her out, but we are all noticing it.

2 days ago, she sent me a text asking if I liked something she claims she drew, she sent me a picture and it was very obviously AI, but when I called her out she was very adimit that she drew it, her is the conversaition (Typed out B/C I can't take screen shots on my phone)

**

*SENDS PIC**

Leah: And for two hours its pretty fire.
Definetly could've added more grey to the eyes though, Lowkey impressed with my skills.

Me: IS that AI?

Leah: No

Me: Huh, well hey good job on your hella advancdness

Leah: Thanks?

Me:Mhm

Me: What brushes did you use??? They look so smooth?

Leah: I used Kleki then when I had most of what i wanted I switched to an app that has thicker smoother brushes

Me: What app???

Leah: Freeform

Me: Freeform doesn't have brushes like that?

Leah: Again I used Kleki for my main lay out then Freeform for the smoother brushes

Leah: yes it does

Me: It kinda looks like procreate

Leah: Not sure what that is?
Leah: I only have 2 apps. I did my best.

Me: What brush did you use?

Leah: Normal brush and blending brush

Me: Can I see your other digital art? I kinda wanna see your art style and see how close our art styles are?

Leah: I can try to find some its been a while

Me: I'll send some of mine

Me: What kinda Stylus do you use?

Leah: My Finger

Me: Leah

Me: Babes

Leah: ?

*LEAH SENDS ANOTHER OBVIOUSLY AI GENERATED IMAGE*
Leah: I only have one other right now that I can send you

Me: Don't josh what kinda Stylus

Leah: My finger. I'm bing honest I do it on my chrombook and I have to zoom in and stuff but I make it work

Leah: (My Name), I know you think its AI, but i swear to you, its not. I also have no accsess to AI. Its blocked on my phone and on my chrombook and home computer. I've just been practicing my art.

Me: Can I see your layers?

Leah: I can't get on my computer right now.

Me: I don't want to assume Leah but it has a lot of AI tell signs.

Leah: How're you? Hows school goin?
Leah: I promise you its not AI. What signs show AI?

Me: Fine tiering. the eyelashes in the first one you sent are over the glasses rim and the pircing on the second one girls eyebrow are on a SEPERATE eyebrow thing.

Me: Leah, its okay to tell me the truth, I honestly don't care but i feel hurt that you'd lie.

Leah: I got confused on what was hair and what was eyebrow thanks for telling me I'll fix it when i get the chance.

Leah: (My Name). I'm not lying. I don't like lying and I'm not lying I promise you.

Me: Leah, I've been doing art since I was VERY young, I've taken countless classes, and my dads art has has litteraly been in an art gallery. And yet, some how you have more advance and detailed art then I've ever done.With no past digital art history or anything CLOSE to the art level those have.

Leah: I don't have access to AI.
Leah: Anyway how're you? How're things there?

**

She ended up completely changing the subject and I didn't want to keep fighting her about it, I asked some of our other close friends and they both agreed its AI but they just said its cute and didn't push further with her, they then told my that she has been doing this little small lying thing with everyone since I moved and that they think she might have youngest child syndrome or something.
I honestly could give less of a flying s**t if she used AI, I don't like it as someone who does art but I'm not gonna unfriend you over it, I'm honestly just really really hurt how stupid she think I am, and that she could lie to me and not expect me to question her.
I've personally struggled with Pathological lying from a very young age and I honestly spent a good chunck of my life just senselsly lying and I've had to work really really hard to stop these habits, and shes slowly ramping up what shes making up.
Idk, my ma said to let this one go and just see if she gets worse or not and go from there but she doesn't seem to be getting better and shes one of my closest friends so I really REALLY don't want to break this off.

(The Spiderman drawing is a drawing she did- not even a month ago)

I (F23) have been dating my boyfriend (M25) officially since June, but we’ve been talking since March. We’re long distance and make the trip back and forth to see each other the majority of the time.

In the past, he has actively deleted my comments. When we first started dating, he said it was because they were a little too relationshipy, and he didn’t feel comfortable having people know about me yet. He also brought up the “evil eye.” I shrugged it off because he grew up Muslim, so I thought maybe it was something he still practiced, even though he wasn’t really religious anymore.

Recently, I went to his city for the first time. He lives outside of the US, and up until this point, he had always come to visit me, or we had met in different states away from mine. While I was there, we took a bunch of pictures, so I posted mine. A few days later, he posted his.

I commented almost immediately after he posted because he had told me he was going to schedule the post. I left two cute comments because he sometimes leaves multiple comments on my posts, too.

He then texted me asking why I hadn’t commented yet. I told him I had and sent him a screenshot as proof. He basically responded with, “Oh, that’s weird.”

I decided to check his post from my old account, and my comment wasn’t showing up there. However, the comment count would briefly say 12 before refreshing back to 11. My comment was still visible on my main account, though.

I decided to try commenting from my spam account instead, and that comment showed up when I looked at his post from my main account. I thought the whole thing was really weird, and it bothered me.

The second thing that concerns me is that there have been multiple instances where his location on Life360 showed him at home for over a day, even though I knew for a fact that he had been at the gym or out somewhere. Usually, he brings it up before I even say anything, and I can’t help but wonder if he’s genuinely confused about the glitches or if he’s acting clueless. Maybe I’m just overthinking it, but it’s happened multiple times with his location, whereas mine has never done this.

On top of that, everyone else’s comments seem to show up on his Instagram post except mine. There are also a few questionable comments from other women on his newest post, which have made me even more uncomfortable.

I’m worried that I might be overreacting or reading too much into everything, but the combination of these things has been bothering me.

Edit: also when I asked him if he restricted me he said ?? what are youyou being fr ? idk why its not showering in the main account but i did not BLOCK or RESTRICT you

Am I overreacting???

My S/O often leaves food in pots and containers after cooking. I’ve asked him to scrape the food into the trash since it takes so long for us to get around to doing dishes. Unfortunately he has a habit of forgetting to do this and then when I start cleaning up I find a whole disgusting ecosystem growing inside containers.

I’m not really upset with him about it. I understand that we both have ADHD, work long hours, and are just too tired to do any chores after work.

I have OCD and the thought of opening a container full of mould spores and letting them out is incredibly distressing to me, so I usually just toss the whole thing in the trash.

Today I found a pot of rice. I’m hesitant to throw out an entire pot, but I get nauseous even thinking about cleaning it. Food containers are easy to throw out because they’re cheap plastic from take out that we reuse, but throwing out a whole pot feels like it might be an overreaction.

So I ask Reddit, AIO?

EDIT: Thank you for your replies. I understand that I am overreacting. I will not be throwing out the pot. Dishes are the only thing we struggle with. We’re good about keeping rest of the apartment pretty tidy, we just don’t have a good system for dishes. I’m going to talk to him when he gets home today and see if we can work out a new system

Hello this is my first Reddit post.
I 13 m is wondering if I am overreacting because I think my parents are abusive let me give you some context.
My relation ship with my perents has always been strange every something minor happens my dad always yells at me for everything like if I’m arguing with my sibling over something he always comes in acting like a saviour and tries to resolve the problem by yelling at me talking about respect towards my older siblings. Or if I try to express my emotion he always gets mad at me. Now right now you are probably thinking my dad is a horrible person but let’s talk about me for a bit. I am unhealthy because I have been homeschooled for 9 months and all I have been doing is my school sleeping eating and playing games that year I bearly sociolized and I was kinda isolated so the only way I talked to people was through games so since then I’ve been different and I do not know why I’ve started to keep more to myself and was a bit more rude or aressive towards my perents fast forward to now Im in school I talk to some of my friends ob the phone and i want my own privacy (keep that in mind) and recently got my own room. Now that you have some context let’s get back to the stuff that has been happening.
So recently whenever my dad called me I would always reply with “yeah” but my dad does not like that for some reason and always says some shit about respect and how when he calls me I should reply with “yes daddy” witch I don’t want to do because it should not be some big thing but my egotistical bum of a dad takes this as some sorts of an attack and says the next time he calls me I will “see what will happen” and basically threatens me over. This small thing. So I guess this man always finds something to spout his mouth about so when I started to say “yes daddy” when he called me he found something else to yell at me about.
Here is the story This Happend yesterday btw.
I was just chilling in my room after school (Im in school now) I bought these rgb lights from Dollarama (cause my school is close to one) I had that light in and then my mom comes in dose not even knock and takes my light saying it disturbs the natural parts of you and it’s bad for my eyes (mind you it was just facing up for some ambient light) so I was asking my mom to give a clear answer of why I couldn’t use it and she replies with “because I said so” so at that point W was not going to argue so I stormed back to my room and slammed the door not even that hard just hard enough so then my bum of a father comes in and starts talking about why I slammed the door and I was pissed at that point so I did not say anything and this motherfuxker tells me to not close my door for no fuxking reason so I when he left I Scoofed at him and he turned around and got mad at me acting like I swear’d ar him so he took away all my electronics except my phone for some reason and hid then somewhere so at that point i was pissed confused and very angry and this mf comes in my room afterwards and talks about my wanting to “play big” and that he was the man of the house so I was just very angry atp and did not even want to talk to anyone (all this because of a stupid light). So yeah that is my story sorry for bad grammar or if this is confusing this is my first Reddit story.

I (F24) lied to my bf (M25) about something seemingly insignificant, but it’s eating me alive. AIO?

EDIT: Idk why everyone is putting so much stress on the loan itself. At this moment this isn’t my question. The question is whether I should come clean with my lie, just because I lied and it’s wrong?

For the first time since I started dating my LITERALLY PERFECT bf (almost 1 year ago) I lied to him.
Me, a poor working full time student, had an amazing financial turnaround last week and It made me really, really, really happy. So at some point when hanging out w him I decided to start sharing this story about a family member helping me out with my rather small loan (500$).

But then when saying this, I realised I’m actually coming clean to somebody for the first time about my loan for real and I started panicking. As it’s something that makes me rather ashamed and I feel irresponsible for having taken it out.
I was NOT ready to have that conversation…so for some reason I told him the loan was 350$!!! Why would I even do that. It felt like coming clean in front of a parent, I activated the most primitive defence mode to minimise the damage kind of, I think. Then he ask how much was it again and I REPEATED the false price.

It was yesterday and I don’t know what to do. I don’t think I can go on without telling him and I’m very scared to lose his trust. Cause why would you lie about something so “insignificant” (there isn’t much difference between 350$ and 500$. A loan is a loan).

AIO for thinking it should seriously affect trust in our relationship?

Has anyone else felt like there parent is a ring leader trying to control your life, I don’t know how to deal with my mom who opens my mail, goes through my stuff, she treats my private life as if I’m under 18. I’ve asked her to stop and I’ve tried to set boundaries but she doesn’t listen. I need advice or to know if I’m overreacting

Context:

My husband (29M) and I (26F) got married in January 2026 and had our son February 2026. Our son was very colicky and has CMPA the first 3-4 months of life and has never been a good sleeper.

My husband just goes to work and then goes to the basement. He sleeps on the basement and not in bed with our 8 month old and I. Our baby bed shares with me so I can get the most sleep possible since he only sleeps 2-3 hours at a time. My husband works 8-5:30 Monday through Friday and occasionally works Saturdays.

Referring to the second mortgage, I have a town home in my name and he has a home in his name that we both had before we got married. I haven’t owned the home long enough to sell without paying extremely high taxes (capital gains) so we have discussed already waiting until 2027 to sell it. We have a tenant in the town home currently, but we are in the process of evicting since she hasn’t paid rent (a whole other story honestly)

My husband doesn’t help with child care at all. He probably is in the same room as his son for 30 minutes Monday-Friday, and on the weekends it’s not much different.

If it’s hard to zoom in on the long messages, let me know I can post it differently but they are such long messages.

AIO for being upset? The past 8 months I’ve felt like a single married mother and he doesn’t seem to care. TIA

Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AIO/s/CrIEQW4g02

Gave up on getting my boots back, he was dicking me around and being rude. Thought some people might enjoy seeing him go from apologetic to accusatory once he got banned from a slew of dating apps.

I got banned from tinder for joking about selling nudes in 2022. Woops.

Thank you to the people who were kind, eat glass to the people who weren’t.

For context me and partner have taken in a dog that we thought we could be his forever home. I know the breed well and I am able to keep up with his energy needs etc same with my partner when we went through more research together. Unfortunately he is a bite risk and we have many children that live and play on and around our street. We weren’t told about his reactivity much at all. He barked at us when we met him but he settled after a walk and realised we were okay and so we thought that it may be a territorial thing (all okay as I owned a dog similar to this before and worked it out with him). Unfortunately we can’t pinpoint his triggers at all. After a few days of settling in we thought we’d invite my parents round to meet him and do some work with him. After 25/30 minutes of being around and taking treats off of them (after throwing treats/food behind him to break line of sight first then building to hands) he looked comfortable and rested his head on my mums leg, she went to pet him and he snapped with little to no warning. He did the same with my dad not long after. He has expressed his distaste for children and so we have been muzzle training him to lessen the likelihood of an incident and liability. He has taken to it well but he keeps going to snap at my partner. Now my partner has been doing the same training as me and we both correct him. He respects me more and doesn’t go for me but he does to my partner.

I rang the previous owners to see if they would take him back and they refused (they did say they would but there may have been blurred lines on how long until they wouldn’t. we had him a week and decided it’s not going to work. they may have thought to take him back if in 2-3 days if that was the time frame we decided that we couldn’t). We have now put him up for rehoming and gotten in touch with a breed specific charity/shelter as a back up. We feel blindsided as we were told that he is a family dog despite the working breed he is. He definitely isn’t but could be with long and consistent work. He doesn’t settle around my partner and with bite and dig into him until he moves sometimes away from me.

I can’t have my partner and I worrying if he will cause damage enough for him to go to the hospital as he keeps building pressure with each nip/bite. My partner is nervous around him so maybe he senses that.

This now leads us to here. I have a couple that live a couple hours away and we are driving some of the way to meet them to see how they get on and possibly do another meet and greet later if they’re still interested. They know all the ins and outs as we want to give them the complete transparency that we didn’t have (we do understand that the previous owners loved him and were struggling with the idea of saying goodbye so we understand some things have gone amiss) and let them know the risks and behaviours we have found. We are continuing to work with him to lessen these behaviours for the new owners and for himself in general.

I had a message tonight from this delight of a human and I just want to know if the bad feeling in my stomach about him is valid or not. I didn’t like his lack of information and wall up approach nor did I like the phrase “what do you think will happen” that we received like I feel that he could be used as a bait dog if your not open enough. He also clearly hadn’t taken the time to read the advert properly at all as he would have known that there are behavioural issues present. He also wants us to deliver him which is a 2 hour drive with traffic and he can’t see an issue with the fact that it’s a 4 hour round trip for us.

So am I overreacting with this or is it someone who may not know how to communicate well?

So there was an incident on a street close to my home a while ago where a man came up to me and sexually harrassed me.

Even though incidents like this happen to women all the time (unfortunately), I cannot forget this particular situation. It was the worst harrassment I've ever experienced.

One night I was walking back home from the clubs and was still a bit drunk when this man suddenly rushed over to me, kissed me on the lips and pullled down my top to look at my breasts, and even started commenting on them. Back then my reaction was super slow due to the alcohol and I didn't do much... I still regret that but I don't wanna think about it too much.

I wanted to explain what happened exactly so you guys can unterstand my situation and/or feelings.

Because since then, I'm having lots of trouble to walk down this particular street. I feel like this certain place is somehow connected to this incident in my brain and whenever I go there, my heart starts racing and I'm scared something similar will happen again (even tho, rationally speaking I know it won't happen again).

Good thing is that whenever I have to go to the train station or somewhere else, I can take another street but it takes like up to 10 minutes longer.

I have a friend who visits me quite often and when we go out together and I tell her to walk the other, longer way to the train station (so we don't have to use the other one), she seems a bit annoyed? I don't even know if I'm interpreting things wrong here and she knows about my situation but I can't bring myself to overcome that fear. And I don't know, it sometimes feels like she is understanding but still annoyed at taking a longer walk whenever we are out together. She sometimes even asks me if it is really neccessary to use the other way. I hate to be a burden.

So I just wanted to know if I am overreacting regarding not wanting to go there anymore. Or should I just try as in 'confrontation therapy'? I don't know, I've never had this before, this feels like some trauma or something. But I don't talk about it with a lot of people because I feel ashamed

For some context, my siblings let’s call them Oak (10yrs, purple in text) and Aspen (14yrs, yellow in text) are considerably younger than me and I’ve always been a support role for them. I was Aspen’s secondary care giver for the first 2 years of his life because my stepdad couldn’t get off his ass and actually be a parent.

Their home life is awful. My mom is incredibly unstable, with severe mood swings where she lashes out violently and gets into actual physical fights with her children. On the other swing of things, she will be overly attentive to the point of annoying and lashes out if you don’t follow along with everything she wants. She has histrionic personality disorder and bipolar.

My stepdad never hurts them but is incredibly cold and strict, yells a LOT and is incredibly emotionally abusive towards my mom. They’re both horrible to each other, to the kids, it’s all just horrible.

And YES I’ve already contacted CPS multiple times to intervene and they’ve never done anything. Fuck CPS honestly.

As an adult, I’ve always been there for my siblings and I don’t mind them leaning on me. I love them more than anything in the world, we have regular sleepovers at my house where we play video games, do fun stuff, eat snacks, and I shower them with love and listen to them vent. I guide them through breathing techniques when they call me and there’s trouble at home, I’m literally the first person ANYONE in that house calls when there’s something wrong. I always have patience for my brothers though. They literally mean the entire world to me and I would’ve cut my abusive mom off at 18 if it weren’t for them.

Recently, my youngest sibling Oak has been acting out a lot. He’s always acted out for attention, which I’ve tried to combat in certain ways. But they pulled him out of school this year and put him into a hippie school that my mom is obsessed with, where they draw and sing their way through lessons. I also went to this school for a few years as a kid… my dad had to tutor me when I went back to public school cause I was so behind on so many subjects.

As you can see in the texts, Oak hasn’t been participating. He’s told me multiple times that he does not want to be in this school, he misses his old school and his old friends. He’s really struggling with this transition. But my mom has a hard on for this stupid hippie cult bullshit and is living vicariously through him. It’s horrible.

Did I overreact in this situation of being asked to fix this problem that they created? My mom sent me a text at literally the same time as a stepdad asking me to privately tutor Oak in drawing (but somehow made his lack of drawing my fault, in a crazy stretch of logic).

What the hell do I do? I want to get these kids out of this hole but I’ve been down every legal route and I have 0 rights to custody as a sibling and I know the court battle would be long and expensive and I can’t afford it.

Alright, this is a lot so bare with me. I've been living with a man who I've been financially supporting for 5 years now. I established that I'm going to leave him without a trace once I get a stipend amount of security money in a month, on my birthday. Keep this in mind, I've been in a volatile relationship that most of my social circle is aware is toxic and that I've expressed the desire to break up or be alone, etc. etc.

Because my current "bf" has actually been a squatter for the last 5 years, he has squatters right. He refuses to leave, by the way. I have told him about my new partner. This is who I'm going to actually be writing about- because I'm trying to figure out if he's good for me or not.

I've known this guy, let's call him John, for about a year now. He has been aware of my domestic situation and knew that I lived with a man and engaged with him sexually at times. John has been sober and in AA for a few months now, and has also just lost both his parents within a year and a half. He basically has a part time job right now because he has to retake some classes to go back to his old career. He also has just gotten a DUI and claims that he cant visit me because of drug tests.

I went to visit him this week and left the current man who lives with me, and wont let me break up with him, in my house to take care of my dog. He lives across the country, so it was a kind of impulsive decision that I feel was made so impulsively because of pressure that was being put on by John to go visit him.

When I got to John's house, I was actually repulsed. There were cockroaches everywhere and he just did not seem to realize how disgusting his house was. I almost felt offended by the fact that he basically pressured me and had me pay for the flight to see him, only to have me stay in his roach infested house.

Now, I'm not that judgmental. I mean, yes, it was gross... But what really got to me was that he ended up drinking almost a whole flask of vodka (when he was supposed to be sober) and ended up showing me a song that was sentimental to him. While the song was playing, I saw a cockroach and I greaked out and went to go clean the area. He then got upset at me for "not caring enough" about the horrible song he was showing me because I got disgusted by the roaches and started to clean and move away.

The man I currently live with and want to remove from my home makes everyone look good compared to him and how he treats me. John is a really sweet guy when he wants to be and has shown me so much love and true comfort (could be a love bomb, which is what I want to figure out) because I would be willing to look past or help him with his issues if he actually has the love he claims to have for me.

The red flags are there, though. He seems to not have a lot of consideration for anyone in his life, even though he's shown some acts of service towards me (my love language), he literally didn't see where I was coming from with my actual discomfort with the dirtiness of his space.

He also gives me more anxiety about living with my emotionally abusive ex boyfriend, who is actually a squatter. Instead of understanding the situation I'm in or trying to facilitate a space for me to go to and be comfortable, he's just mad at me for being in this situation even though he was aware of it from the beginning.

So, what I'm trying to figure out is if I should continue to pursue this tryst with John or not. He doesn't have his shit together at all and I don't know if he's going to- but at the same time, I'm wondering if I'm about to fumble a really good thing because of the domestic situation I'm currently in.

I know this was a lot to read and hopefully I made some sense. Basically, I'm trying to see if I should pursue a relationship with John despite some pretty bad red flags. I feel super amazing with him though, and haven't felt that way in a very long time with someone.

TLDR : How to tell if I am being love bombed by a narcissist or if I'm not able to manage an actually potentially good relationship

EDIT: I am wondering, is having cockroaches a deal breaker for you guys? I genuinely feel like sometimes people are put in situations that they can't always get out of and genuinely, I wouldnt want to abandon a good hard working person for trying to get out of living in squalor through no fault of their own, if that makes sense.

I think the biggest issue I had was his general hygiene and complete inconsideration towards my comfort and justifiable disgust.

I 20F have only been working here for a little iver a month now. So these are all new people. Qhen I first started I had some issues with a coworker who is not relevant to this post.

I am a disabled person. I have 3 hernieted disc and stomach issues.

These girls that I work with have had issues with me fir awhile. Their all very clicky and gossipy to put it in simple terms. One of these girls happens to be a manager. The others are not. They gossip about everyone. Including me. They'll gossip right at the registers and than stop if the person their talking about walks by.

Tonight I was having a particularly rough night. I went into work with my stomach bothering me. I should have stayed home but I can't afford too. (I am currently the only one in my household working). So I was in the bathroom a bit more than usual. I came out. Manager a. Lets call her L. I like L. She's nice and understanding. She has the same stomach issues I do so she pulled me aside. She asked if I was having issues with my stomach to which I apologized and told her yes. I explained that I was just gonna stay home but really cant afford to. L told me that the other manager and the other coworker were upset because its not fair for me to be in the bathroom so long when I cant and that they believed I was just on my phone. L said she wanted to ask because she knew it probably had to do with my stomach from previous conversations.

I am very open about my health issues. Its not something I hide and it is something I told my hiring manager when he hired me.

L asked me to give up my break today to make it fair. I agreed because I did take awhile. I thought everything was done with.

I walk by the registers and the ither manager and other coworker are talking. Let's call them A and AN.

Manager A stops talking as soon as I walk over where as AN gives me a dirty look. Whatever. I ignore it and keep walking.

Manager A comes up and accuses me of not doing my job because she has shirts that need to be put away. Mind you im stood with an arm full of stuff im putting back where it goes. I tell her I'll put the shirts away qhen im done.not a big deal.

Im walking the floor. Doing my job. Putting shirts away. Whatever. Minding my own buisness and doing my job. I walk by and their still talking about me. Saying they just need to fire me. That i shouldnt need so much help(I don't get help). Whatever. I once again ignore it.

Later. Its now 8 58 pm. I have ti do bathrooms at 9. I walk by the registers phone in hand cuz im checking the time and answering a message. I was answering a message cuz I was asking who was picking me up from work.

Manager A follows me to the ither side of the store (where my phone is now put away) as im fixing shirts and shoes and what not.

Manager a approached me and asks me to not be on my phone than tells me that checking it is okay but not having it out walking around. I didnt even have it out. I checked the damn time.

Than I went to do bathrooms.

For a little more context.

I work at a beach shop on the south end of the island.

Most people out this way are rich and dont need to work but choose too just for fun.

Im not here to be friends with these girls. I don't want to be their friend. I just want to do my job without having grown adults mock me for being disabled and bully me.

Hear me out. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years. Last night, we were laying in bed and I was scrolling on my phone and I asked him what he was up to. He’s laying next to me and said he’s going through his phone contact list and deleting people. Not sure what prompted this but I was curious so I roll over to see and just as I do that I see that he clicks on the name of the woman he was seeing right before me. Not long. Like two months. Ended so so from what I know. Clicks her contact info, scrolls on it, and then exits out of it. Decided not to delete it. I’m not sure why but all of a sudden I get this sick to my stomach feeling.

This is the part where I’m confused? My reaction to it. The number has always been in his phone as long as we’ve been together but I guess the part that bothers me is he went through his phone with the intention of deleting numbers, saw the woman’s number and for whatever reason decided he didn’t want to delete it? I wouldn’t have cared knowing the number was in his phone but it was the intention behind the action of not deleting it.

So why do I feel so terrible? Why do I feel like it sent me a message that I can’t “unsee” now about our relationship? I reading too much into it?

My husband (33M) asked me (31F) to make him a latte with our coffee maker. He then told our three year old son to help me. My three year old son climbed on the slightly precarious bar, and was helping me with the ground coffee beans. I was holding my son on the bar, trying not to make a mess with the beans and make the latte and holding the espresso cup. My one year old son comes over and starts trying to climb up onto me, making me lose balance slightly. I ask my husband who is right in front of us, playing guitar, to get my one year old son. He grabs him, puts him down a few feet away and keeps playing guitar. My son crawls right up and does the same thing to me. I ask my husband “Please stop playing and get him”. It takes him a second, he then comes and gets our son, and continues to play guitar. 10 seconds later my one year old son is back and trying to climb on me again. I ask for a third time, this time more with a tone “please stop playing guitar and get our son so I can make this coffee for you”. My husband gets visibly upset and angry that I was getting upset at him for not getting our son. This has turned into a fight and he said that because I was too vague and did not say explicitly “I cannot have our son touching me, you need to take him away and not have him touching me” that I am in the wrong here, and it was my bad communication that has started this fight. AIO that I am so mad at him right now about this!?

I’ve been married for 11 years to my husband who is usually very intuitive and considerate. The problem always comes with holidays - Mother’s Day (we have two kids), our anniversary, my birthday, Christmas, etc.

I have clearly and calmly communicated to him (for well over a decade now) that holidays are important to me. I was raised to “go big” for the people you love on their special days, and I put a ton of effort into celebrating him on his occasions.

Over the years, it became clear that if I didn’t expressly ask for exactly what I wanted, there would be hurt feelings on these days. So, about 5 years ago, as much as I disagree with it, I started saying exactly what I’d like - brunch for Mother’s Day, X gift for my birthday, etc. It killed my spirit a little (I never ask for direction for him - I know him well enough to celebrate him in a way he feels loved), but at least I knew I’d get birthday cards, etc.

This year for my birthday, he went rogue. He made a beautiful, very sweet video clip of my kids answering funny questions about me, which I absolutely loved - but that’s all he did.

There was no celebration, no decorating, no birthday cake. I even asked if he’d bring me home lunch, and he ended up shooting the breeze with friends for two hours instead.

When I asked if he’d at least picked something inexpensive off the handful of things I’d asked for, gift-wise, he was hurt and offended, because he had made the video. It became clear he thought it was all he needed to do.

So I ask you, strangers on the Internet - AIO? Should the video have been enough, and am I being a spoiled brat? I fully realize I’m not having a sweet 16, but I just go so over the top for him, and this is such a repeated issue, that I’m struggling here.

I (32 F) saw a text on my husband’s (31 M) phone from one of his female coworkers that I’ve never heard of. The text was an invitation to a bonfire at her house on a Friday night and to stop by any time after 7pm and to BYOB. My husband didn’t say anything about this to me, so I felt uneasy about it. When I confronted him, he said he told her no in person that day, but she decided to send the text invite anyways. Odd right?

Some weeks have passed, and I still felt uneasy about it since my husband wasn’t giving me any answers saying I was crazy. I texted her during a moment of anger and I asked her why she was texting my husband inviting him to a bonfire when he’s married. She never responded, and instead immediately told her boss and gossiped about it with all her coworkers.

A week later, my husband invited me to his work party, in which she planned to attend as well. I felt embarrassed for “overreacting”, but I attended anyway. Before the work party, he fought me before going and tried to cancel, but we ended up going. At the work party, she purposely sat at the table right in front of me and kept looking at me all night. At times I saw my husband blushing from embarrassment but I tried my best to bite my tongue, since he blamed it on his drink.

After the party, I told my husband I felt relieved after seeing her in person and how I felt silly for saying anything. Dropped the topic and thought it was over with.

Another week goes by and my husband and I were in the middle of an argument when he texted me saying “what if i told you that my coworkers are better than you? Give you a taste of your own medicine.” So unfortunately I was hurt and texted the coworker again in a hostile way calling her a cheater (she’s also married) and etc. She told the manager again and gossiped around the hospital about me reaching out to her and threatened to call the police on me. This comment made me certain that he has a crush on her because it’s weird to say that in a fight. He claims it was because in the heat of the moment I said my ex was better (haven’t seen him over a decade btw) but isn’t it weird he said his coworker is better than me? He said it was to hurt me but if I was wrong about the accusations, isn’t it weird that’s the first person he thinks of to make me jealous? Am I overreacting? This comment made me want to file for divorce I cannot trust that he’s not into her if he said that during a fight with me. Please correct me if I’m wrong but my gut tells me otherwise.

The girl never responded to my messages btw, even though I told her she was ruining my marriage. It seems odd. If she were innocent, she’d respond right? At the very least, to clear her name and not cause marital problems unnecessarily right? Idk.

I think he’s cheating on me or at the very least they like each other. Idk what to do, but my gut says to file for divorce but I’m afraid that I’m judging wrong? AIO???? Am I overreacting?

EDIT: thank you to everyone that pointed out that I am acting batshit crazy, as I’ve realized that I have created a mess & im not proud of how i acted towards this woman, especially since it’s not her fault in any way. Im not sure what to do now, after all that has been done. I wont contact this woman again, but as far as my marriage…I still don’t believe he’s being honest after the comment he made. I was wrong, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I am clearly hurting. Seems like all I can do is ignore how i feel and stay silent. I want to make my marriage work but it pains me to think about him going to work everyday while having feelings for some other woman. The comment he made will always be in my head. At least if he used another woman in that comment, I’d have peace knowing it was in the past.

Obligatory context: I (26f) and my husband (28m) live with my husband’s parents. This is an arrangement of mutual interest because the in laws are much older and need help often and we are a young family with a >1 year old daughter and money is obviously tight. I and my husband constantly help around the house and property. Today my husband and his brothers set aside time to play MTG together and they convened at my in laws house to play for only a few hours. Two hours into playing father in law comes inside from working outside and says something to the effect of “ I have four sons in side and not one of them thought to come help me outside.” He was called out on this by the oldest brother and my husband. ( I was not here when this happened I was out with my daughter)
When I came home my husband was in tears absolutely gutted by feelings of shame. I ofc am immediately angry because wtf. I quell my anger and ask each brother their version of what happened and it is all about the same just variations of verbiage. I decide I would like to have a conversation about this with my father in law. This may be where I am the AH.

Text him: “Hey can I talk to you?”

He replies: “I got reprimanded for five minutes by (oldest brother) and (husband) for asking wrong and I realize I should’ve just asked and maybe not done it the way I had done it but in my behalf, I had asked this morning if later anyone wanted to help and of the four nobody offered one said directly no.”

I reply: “It’s not that you asked wrong it’s that you didn’t ask and you manipulated and guilt trip instead of asking for help that’s not OK. And after they called you on it, you got angry. I don’t know if you know it, but your actions were extremely harmful. I think you owe (husband) a very sincere apology. He already has self worth issues stemming around productivity, so what you said hurt him deeply. You made (husband) feel worthless for doing so.”

He replies: “I did apologize and I said I was sorry for asking the wrong way”
(Husband and oldest brother tell me it was in no way sincere)

I reply:” If you knew how deeply you hurt your son you would apologize for how you made him feel rather than the action you took. You really cut him deep (FIL)”

He replies: “I didn’t mean to do that to him. It hurt my feelings to be told I was manipulating when I didn’t mean that at all. I was just asking a question you know not every person‘s motives are manipulative. I actually just had a question. Maybe (husband) and I can talk after things cool down a little bit.”

I reply: “manipulation is manipulation whether you meant to do it or not “ I send an image of guilt tripping by definition

He replies: “ OP, respectfully you’re over analyzing it you’re not my analyst you only see things from your point of view. Those psychological definitions are insulting, but also are not absolute sometimes in the right circumstances indications of what might be, but not always absolute”

I reply: “I am not trying to berate you. I am not here to define your point of view. I am just bringing it to your attention of exactly what you did and how it was not OK. “

He replies: “No, there’s a thing called back off mode where you need to give give a situation time to cool off. You’re pressing things really hard right now.”

I reply: “ I was just trying to have a conversation with you. If you need space I can give you space. Just use your words”

He replies: “ is it OK for my son’s to talk to me disrespectfully cause you weren’t there and they did and you can’t just say you’re just defining things like it’s factual you’re just hearing (husband’s) side of things”

I reply: “ I took all of the boys’ accounts of what happened. I’m not speaking to you disrespectfully, I’m only speaking to you directly. You know I am not one to shy away from confrontation but not all confrontations are personal attacks or arguments. I just wanted to have a word with you.”

He replies: “I think you’re being manipulative to try to get me to apologize and now you’re using my sons’ accounts against me like a court of law, I was raised in a world where I helped my parents without asking. Imagine how I felt working out there for six hours, and I have four young boys in there playing games while I’m working and they didn’t even offer to help and then I get yelled at for bringing it up.”

I reply: “wow.” I didn’t know how to reply to such a victim switch.

He replies: “For you to say that you’re just reporting the facts is to infer that I’m not factual and that is manipulation”

I reply: “No one made you work out there for six hours alone.”

He replies: “I’m done talking.”

I reply: “it is true I am trying to get you to apologize because I thought you’d care.” (Might be manipulative of me idk I was being sincere)

He replies: “ now you’re trying to manipulate me to say that I don’t care”

I reply: “we’re done talking.”

Did I push too hard? Was I being manipulative? Idk.
He has had a history of manipulative and borderline psychopathic behavior in the past.

I’ve become insecure. I shower, take care of myself but my husband wants me to take care of myself. In his definition: not one body hair, teeth white, no scars, no strawberry legs. I have imperfections. Even my elbows he’s annoyed that they are a bit tanner.

23F, semi-live with my parents

I am not a very physically affectionate person. My mother is and it makes me uncomfortable.

- whenever I sit by her she will try to touch my buttcheeks by putting hand down my pants
- she also tries to pick at my acne whenever I am around
- always just walks into my bedroom without knocking, often when I just got out the shower and am changing
- one time she told a friend she hopes someone takes me out clubbing, gets me drunk so I lose my virginity as she wants grandkids
- today she put her hands around my neck like strangling to twist me around, which hurt quite a bit, as she ‘just wanted to kiss me’ on the cheek
- I used to like hugs, but I don’t with her anymore because it makes me uncomfortable, given behaviour above
- often insists I kiss her on the cheek goodnight or won’t let me leave the room

The hands around the neck thing is what prompted me to make this post as I am questioning whether I am exaggerating as my family think I’m overreacting over that. But I guess I just don’t feel safe and haven’t for a a while.

For some background, my current boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years now and have an 18 month old. We got pregnant very quickly and I have an almost 4 year old from another relationship.

My boyfriend gets to go golfing, go to the gym, and go with friends whenever he wants. A few weeks back he even went on a weekend trip out of state with his friends. Meanwhile I can’t tell you the last time I’ve got to see my friends, the only thing I do for myself is my monthly nail appointment which he even makes comments about like “why do you need to do that every month”, keep in mind he gets a haircut every 2-3 weeks. He also can’t handle watching both the kids by himself. He gets overwhelmed by my toddler because she’s a normal 3 year old with normal 3 year old behaviors. I also don’t feel like he ever helps with parenting. I don’t work Friday-Sunday and when I’m here he does nothing. His parents babysit our 18 month old throughout the week and when he is done with work they’ll even watch her so he can go, go to the gym, etc.

Well currently my toddler is with her dad bc it’s his vacation time, so I’ve been taking advantage of when our 18 month old takes a nap and laying down. Well historically he hates when I lay down as he doesn’t see it as productive. Meanwhile I’m the one who gets up early with the baby and recently she had HFMD so she wasn’t sleeping so I’ve been up almost every hour of the night. He expects me to spend all my free time cleaning. Although he will ask me to clean and then dip out or say “can you clean up in here a little bit” while he goes to the gym. If I say I don’t want to like for example when I work my 10 hour days, he will get mad and shut down and say for example then “ok well I’m going to go upstairs and lay down then”. Whenever he asks me to do something and I don’t do it his response is to passive aggressively tell me he is going upstairs and say nothing else.

Just now he came upstairs and I knew he was coming to see if I was laying down. Then he left and came back up and said “all you ever do is lay down” and knew that I would be up here “laying down and on my phone”. I simply said “ok well clearly it’s not working out”. He walks away and comes back again and says he wants me to do whatever I can to find a way to get out (house is in his name) bc whenever I have “free time” I just want to lay in bed and I’m “lazy” and said “you are how old”. Then he comes back up AGAIN and said “and don’t worry, I’ll stop working right now to clean up since there’s free time and you should be cleaning. This is the the only time to do that but don’t worry I’ll stop what I’m doing to clean since you only want to fucking lay in bed. So you’re welcome”. Mind you he works from home and doesn’t have to work today. I can’t tell you the last time he is even changed a diaper while I’m here or put her to bed. Whenever I ask for help he makes an excuse and says either he doesn’t know how to, he is placing a bet that he has to get in quickly, or he has to go to the bathroom. I just didn’t say anything but when I’m tired he says “why are you always so exhausted”. I just feel like I can’t take it anymore. He makes me feel useless and like nothing I ever do is right. Mind you everything that needs built in our house ive done by myself. Our bed frame, our dresser, I painted the living room by myself. Bc when I ask for something done he puts it off for weeks until I just do it myself but if he has an idea or wants something done I’m expected to react and do it right when he wants it done.

throwaway because my friend might see this (though they probably wouldnt mind me posting). my friend and i are both in our mid-20s and POC (kind of relevant later). we have known each other since elementary school but reconnected a few years ago and became really close friends. when we first reconnected i was hesitant to become friends because we voted/supported different political parties in our country. at the time at least, i believe she was more right-leaning while i was and am more left, but i will clarify that she isnt and never was some raging right-wing extremist or anything. i thought i could overlook this difference or at least provide education and resources that explain my perspective in hopes she would be understanding. over the years she has been very open and receptive to hearing my stance on social values so i thought we were more aligned than originally thought.

however, there have still been instances where i felt kind of uncomfortable by things she said or mentioned. i found out early on that her friends at the time would use the n-word (none of them are black) in conversations, and despite this she still remained friends with them (though she did distance herself from the friend who said it the most, for other reasons). she also mentioned before that her ideal type is black men, but never felt like she could date one because she was scared of being stared at as an interracial couple and worried about what others would think. to me it felt like some internalized racism and unconscious bias, but i gave her the benefit of the doubt.

recently she started dating a black man. she had a huge epiphany realizing that the friend who used the slur is straight up racist and not truly supportive of her relationship. i questioned her, asking if she genuinely didnt realize this friend was racist this whole time, or if she was being passive and was okay with letting them say these words. this racist friend also accused my friend of being racist, which my friend vehemently disagreed with. while she was explaining this to me, she said some things along the lines of “there is no way any part of me could be racist” and “i dont see race when dating”, etc. i know her intentions were good and what she was trying to say, but those comments made me feel uncomfortable. i waited a couple days and was honest with her about how it made me feel, and she was sympathetic.

the issue is, she denied having any implicit biases, which i thought was ignorant. after discussing more we landed on “we both agree racism is bad, but what we consider racist is different”. i admit i did push her to reflect more because it is my personal belief that we all have implicit biases and should take time to consider our privilege, identities, and how words have meaning beyond the actual word itself, but i dont think it landed well and we continued disagreeing with each other. honestly i felt kind of gaslit during our chat and we’re kind of at a standstill now.

since then, she has also posted some things that i felt uncomfortable with. for example, i do not support chris brown and do not believe we can separate the art from the artist, but she used his song in an instagram story and listens to him casually a few times a year. she also posted a story describing something as “ghetto”, which i also felt was offensive. i usually do call her out on these things and felt like we always had productive conversations, but now im feeling like she never fully agreed with me and just tried not to say or share those things in front of me.

so i guess my dilemma is, am i being to critical or sensitive here? its true no one is perfect and friends arent going to fully align on everything, but this feels big for me and i know thats a valid enough reason to end the friendship if i wanted to. id like to hear others’ opinions and if anyone had similar experiences, or how they navigated these situations. i want to think carefully as i really do value our friendship and she has been very supportive of me in every situation. we used to talk daily so it has been difficult distancing myself recently while i process this. thanks for reading my long post

I have a relative who frankly I presume has some sort of substance problem or severe mental health issues; I have numerous issues and do not speak to people like this, or consider anything described to be acceptable behaviour.

Hi guys, I need some help to know if I'm overreacting or the asshole and I'd really appreciate another view on this.

So my dad always has this habit where he just grabs food that isn't his. Example, I order a pizza and leave leftover slices in the oven to save for later and he eats it. Another example, I had an exact measurement of chips for one person in the air fryer and when it was done he grabs a whole bowls worth of it without asking me which I would have happily given him some if he did.

So this morning I was about to shower and my mum and sister decided to order breakfast. I specifically asked my sister to get me a pain au chocolate since the place they were ordering from had my favourite one. The whole time I was in the shower I was looking forward to having coffee and the croissant (been craving it for days).

My dad comes home right as I got out of the shower (I'm still in the bathroom getting dressed). He tries going into the bathroom and then realizes that I'm in it. Cool. After getting out and doing my hair and all I go into the kitchen to eat my croissant and make some coffee.

The croissant is missing....

He ate it.....

So obviously I got irritated because we don't always just have croissants lying around the kitchen. It's obvious it was ordered as well. He knows I was home. The croissant was beside a packaged take away sandwhich too. All the more evidence that it's food being saved for someone else.

He comes in the kitchen saying he ate it and I told him he needs to ask before just taking other people's food like that. He keeps saying 'why should I ask' and I try to tell him that it's not ok to just grab other people's food especially when it's obvious that it's someone else's.

He gives me a shitty excuse that he didn't know I was home but he clearly did know because he tried going in the bathroom and my sister and mum told him I was in there.

We end up getting into an argument and he starts yelling at me and I start yelling back. I still don't think I'm in the wrong for telling him to just ask because again, if he did ask, there would be absolutely no problem.

It's just shit how if I make food or if I'm saving food I have to walk around eggshells or hide it because he just grabs it.

The worst part is that my dad, mom and sister think I'm crashing out over a croissant when it's not that anymore, it's the principle and basic respect towards people especially when you live with them. It doesn't even have to be food, it could be other items that you would have to buy again after one use.

It's a pattern he has that I've been quiet about most my life because my mum would always tell me 'its ok it's your dad, just allow him to do it'. I understand he's my dad but all I ask is for a simple 'hey is this yours, can I have it?'.

So am I the asshole or overreacting? (P.S thank u for reading)

Hello internet!

Hope y'all doing well, so let me start my story of today with the context. The people mentioned in it will be called by just a letter,

So I have 4 best friend but that day I hang out with two of them, E and A, my Cousin that I will call X came too with a our friend I'll call him Pink, he's a guy that I knew for long even his family and he is really funny, joined by his friend D. I would say out of the 7 people that where here I'm probably the nicest, even tho I like teasing and pester friends in good fun,

One girl we know decided to come, we'll call her L. L Used to like me, X and A. I liked her too but we decided to stay friends , X got with her and A tolerate her. the last person that I'll mention will be called EZ, he's a foreigner and I met him like 2 months ago but he's still a great friend with who we laugh a lot. there are other people but they aren't that important

Now they aren't together and A still tolerate L, and me well I just live my life not caring about her but still trying to be a good friend. But I won't lie sometimes she is a little to close to each of us sometimes, she rub herself on us, but while she isn't to much on me. its the complete opposite for A as L rub herself, jump on him, even try touching him and putting his head in inappropriate places. I already told her to stop things like that, he doesn't like it and she doesn't have the right to do so.

That day we decided to come to the beach, as usual on week-ends. I took my diving mask and went diving in the water, I like it , it feel nice and calm, from time to time I would come back to the others and go back far in the water to dive and just let my body sink

I came to her to pester her a bit like I do with most of them, she told me to leave her alone and I was okay with it, I talked with a few people and went back in deep water. Later I went back to the group and there was a discussion, we talked a lot and at one point I was about to talk to L, when she just cut me off. it felt awkward so I went back where I was but didn't think of it so much.

Later D was wrestling with L, and pink told her that its kinda crazy she can't beat him, as D isn't that good at wrestling and L does some sport. at one point EZ E A and X started taking turn plunging her in the water, but letting her breath so she wouldn't drown, (X does it a lot cause he's insufferable and A does it because she annoy the shit out of him)

at one point E talk to L telling her she doesn't shower its an inside joke he has with her of saying she doesn't shower because she sometimes come hangout with her brother's clothes or in PJ, and one time she came in a deodorant brand shirt, then the others followed with one joke each except me and EZ, mainly because he doesn't talk our language that much

After a minute she started feeling sad, and EZ came to her apologizing, even doing it in our language, she told him to, leave her alone , I saw it and decided to come, I asked her to talk to me and tell me what happened L told me to leave her alone. after that she got out the water and decided to go back home.

The others watched and Pink said not to feel bad for her as she is annoying people and when she ask for trouble and they are not acting mean with her she get angry. as our day ended I decided to sent her a message but she decided no to check them. Later I talked with a common close friend and told her what happened she said she would talk with her

the next day EZ come to see if I'm home, he needed Wi-Fi to call his mother, he got on the phone with her and got back home after, while he was with me he told me he saw L and that when he passed by she looked at him and seemed really angry with him.

a few days letter I was out with A E X and EZ I asked if X got any news of L but he told me L ghosted him too, I sent a message to that common friend asking if she got any news as we got ghosted. she told me she didn't know, but we might see her tomorrow

at first I was mad because EZ and I been pretty kind to her the whole day but we're part of the bad guys. but the further I hear from our group the more I'm angry for EZ his make me so mad, EZ and I are trying to see if she genuinely feel okay and if she want to talk to us, , and the worst part is EZ doesn't know her that much as she's not able to talk to him and she doesn't spend as much time as me with him.

(first time posting things like that as I mostly shitpost a lot on the internet so if it's badly written I'm sorry. I might update y'all if it get some traction and people are interested)