I’m just sad that daycare gets the best of my 18 month old all day and I see him for like 1.5 hours before bed in the evening and i’m sad that I have a 9 week old that has reflux, is fussy, and very attached to me and I have to send her to daycare in 3 weeks despite her ever only being away from me for an hour or so at a time. I can’t extend my leave because it’s unpaid and we can’t afford it and I have a huge job and it wouldn’t be guaranteed if I didn’t go back. I’m just having such a hard time with our days now being numbered and that we don’t get 6 months. She also sleeps horribly so it’s exhausting even thinking about being up half the night then getting two kids ready me ready and out the door and then my husband and I just rushing through in the evening to dinner and bed time.

I've just returned to work after nearly 2 years off and am really struggling. I can't say this to anyone else but seeing other kids at daycare who have their parents switch off drop-off and pick-up makes me almost wish I picked someone different to build a life with.

I work from home and make about 80% of my husband's wage but do so much more around the house and for our daughter because he is simply... not here. I book the doctor's appointments because they'll be around my schedule, I check the daycare calendar because I'll be the one dressing her for Halloween PJ day, I do the tidy-up on my lunch because I'm home. All the little things end up on my plate because I'm here to notice them.

He works incredibly hard but between his commute, his workday and overtime expectations he's gone from 6-6. When he's here, he's a fully present and wonderful dad- he knows her schedule and does bed and toy tidy-up.

I see women with husbands who either work from home or have flexible hours and I just feel almost disappointed I didn't think ahead when picking a partner. Then I feel horribly guilty because my husband is a good one.

Another coworker just left early coughing and hacking out the office. I just worked from home last Thursday and called off Friday because I caught something from my Supervisor who decided to come on to site that Wednesday coughing and hacking.

My coworker probably caught it from me because I had to come in yesterday since I had just asked to work from home and "HR is strict". I don't get sick days and unfortunately I need to save my PTO for when my son is sick. So instead of giving people due time to get it out of their system and work from home safely we force ourselves to come on site and take turns getting each other sick. Where is the logic? RTO standards are ridiculous.

Hi fellow working moms. If you have 2 under 3 and both you and your husband both work in professionnal 9-5 or like 8-4 settings, plus commute, and your kids are in daycare, what does your day look like ? What time do you wake up? Do you cook breakfast? Who does the drop off and pickups?

Do you cook dinner? Do you do daily baths? story time? What time do you pick them up from daycare ? Do you go to the park?

and the 100$ question.. if you have a dog… when do you walk the dog?

We used to spend $150 every two weeks on house cleaners, but my husband decided to just do it ourselves. We were having some issues with our longtime cleaner and just not getting things clean/skipping things- she changed up the schedule and it just worked to part ways. It’s fine and maybe we’ll pick back up, but my husband has taken on the role of cleaner for now.

My friend has a house manager that comes about eight hours a week. The house manager does things like fold and put away laundry, start laundry, unload and reload the dishwasher, prep dinner (my friend will send her the recipe and have the ingredients ready), clean out the fridge, pick up the grocery delivery, return UPS packages.

It sounds brilliant to me, but my husband is not quite on board yet. I think I’d be willing to pay for this! Has anyone done this before? Originally they used a college student, but now it is an older woman that may be retired or a SAHM that just wanted something very part time. No childcare involved, the kids are at school.

Not actually a daycare question, but I wasn’t sure how else to tag this. I plan on returning to work in 9 days. This is my second baby and breastfeeding journey.

I’m a hospice nurse and pump in my car throughout the day. I’m really fortunate that my job is A LOT of charting and making phone calls, so I can pump while I work very frequently. I did great with my last baby.

I have both a standard pump from last time and a eufy wearable. But I have been LOVING the hand pump. I feel like I can empty myself SO quickly and effectively. I have seen a LC. I have good flange fit and replace parts frequently. The electric pump just fills me with a sense of dread? And takes 30 minutes to empty me. I can empty myself in 15 with the hand pump. And it doesn’t give me the icky mental feeling that the electric pump does.

Most of my charting uses voice to text. So… would I be insane for using the hand pump as my primary work pump? Has anyone else done this?

I need to go part time and I know it. I’ve held it together as a full time professional with a baby for a year. It’s been so exhausting with the daycare and the commute, house, dog, everything. I’ve finally achieved my goal salary (like a month ago). And now the baby is sick. Like for real sick. Might need surgery, going to specialists, scaring the shit out of me sick. I was barely holding it together before and now I’m stretching my PTO and calling in every favor to be at the appointments. Things are getting harder, not easier. And I was toying with part time before but now I think it’s just got to happen. I’m grieving. I’ll do what she needs and right now she needs more of me. I need to be with her. The house and the dog need me more too, if I’m honest. I just feel so much grief to take a huge step back from the career and the salary. I’ve got to do it, but I’m dreading it.

This is more of a vent but it would be nice to find others to validate or know what I’m going through.

I am a full time working mom and responsible for the majority of expenses and planning for a teenager. I’m just not sure where to post about issues with my ex and coparenting.

My ex and I have been separated for over a year. We have a teen son and custody time is 7/7. It’s really stressful for me and I’m sure our son. Ex is very angry about the ending of our relationship. Every week I can feel the distance and distrust from our son when he first comes back to me. He usually softens and gets comfortable after a few days. It feel like we finally get back to some comfortable routine and interaction and then we start over again. I know there are a lot of negative things being said to son about me. Son won’t even speak to me when his dad and I are at events together like games.
His dad has filed a civil suit for money he thinks he’s owed from me. So we are in litigation. I also pay child child support. It just feels never ending.
I am constantly afraid our son is going to eventually just believe I am this terrible person and cut me out of his life. Ex has already convinced our son that grandmother (my mom) is a bad person and won’t speak to her. They used to be so close.

All of this and I’m trying to maintain a livelihood and keep it all together.

As the title says, I'm really torn over this.

I currently work in the corporate environment (and have for close to 15 years now) and make really darn good money for what I do. The problem is that my commute can be between 1.5 to 3 hours (one way) depending on traffic and the unreliable transit we have in our area (boat system). I have two small kiddos at home and I barely get any time with them. I leave at 5:00am every day and get home at 5:15pm (if I am lucky). My kids get home from daycare with my husband around 6pm and go to bed at 7:30pm. During the week I have no time to rest, exercise, or really do anything else because I am focused on spending time with my kids, cleaning up from dinner, prepping for the next day, and trying to get to bed at a somewhat reasonable hour before getting up at 4:15am the next day. All of this is just draining on me, both physically and mentally. Long story short, it is not very sustainable for the long term.

I have been offered a new job that will give me much better work/life balance. My commute would reduce to ~20 minutes one way. However, the job is paid hourly versus salaried and I'm looking at approximately a 50% pay cut compared to what I make now. The new job is with city government, so there are some bonuses like a pension and good benefits. It would be a huge change regardless and there are pros and cons on both sides. I will say I debated even applying given the salary discrepancies but went for it in the end.

I really want to say yes and accept it. I have been burned out for months. My husband is absolutely against it for monetary reasons. I do not want to spell out our finances, but we are fairly comfortable financially. We're not rich or something but we are fortunate enough that we are in a secure situation currently and we have a good chunk of savings squirreled away. My husband makes a similar salary to me, so I am not the primary breadwinner - we share that role. Regardless, he frets about the future, our kids, and the money that could have been made if I were to leave for a lower paying job. I recognize the job market is very hard right now and I also recognize that taking a lower paying job would have some impact on us. However, even my doctor has told me I am experiencing burnout and I feel as though something's got to give. He doesn't fully understand the impact of the commute on me because he works from home 99% of the time. He is burned out as well due to his job and stepping into more housework, and if I had more time at home I would be able to help more with chores, making dinner, and other tasks that he has taken on due to my job/commute. I will note that we have considered moving closer to my work but we love where we live and the school districts are very good.

I'm not exactly looking for someone to tell me what to do, but I'm wondering what others might do in a similar situation. Am I crazy to consider leaving a well paying job and taking a 50% paycut for an increase in my work/life balance and mental/physical health? Has anyone done something similar and how did it go for you?

We’ve had our 2.5 year old son enrolled at a local daycare center since he was about five months old. They have been so incredibly good to us and the rest of the families there. We adore the center, have had no major issues with them, and have really built a beautiful community with them. We’ve celebrated Thanksgiving, Mother’s, Father’s and Grandparent’s Day, and the local Christmas parade with them.

But the last month or two, the amount of staff turnover they’ve had is absolutely worrying. We’ve lost three of my son’s normal room teachers (and had them replaced with newer, unfamiliar people) and overall the center went from 20 full time staff to 8.

Tonight, a few of the parents had a call with owner and director to discuss our concerns and it wasn’t exactly soothing. Just song and dance about having trouble hiring qualified staff and asking us to keep our kids home “if we have days off.” They asked us to make sure we were showing our appreciation to the staff and I’m ALL for that, but is that going to keep people at a difficult job with low pay?

With cold/flu/general sickness season rapidly approaching, I’m so nervous that our daycare is going to fail us. We just found out we’re pregnant with our second and now we’re worried if the daycare will even last long enough to enroll our new baby. I’m just devastated. For my son who’s lost the only teachers he’s known, for his little daycare friends, for his staff who are probably feeling burnt out, and for the community we’ve built.

Now I know there is no way to make it all work. But…

Looking for a new job with better pay and more growth than my current position. While I enjoy where I am at there is no growth at the moment or in the next few years.

Current: 30 minute commute each way, close to child’s preschool/daycare, flexible with start time/end time, work 3 days a week (paid 40), able to work part time remote job whenever needed

When I look at different positions I apply but then have regret because I’m not sure most will be the right fit or work out with our schedule
- most are a longer commute, we are about 45 minutes to the next largest city
- earlier drop offs/late pickups, worried about getting home later and barely having any time during the week to do dinner, clean the house, etc
- in a year or so we will probably be going to a big school, which means different school hours, I believe start time is about the same but pickup is about an hour earlier and depending on where I’m working that would mean leaving alot earlier to avoid aftercare costs
- we have no village, or really anyone to help out. We live about hour and 30 minutes from family and due to health issues can’t help.
- and husband works a lot of hours which helps us out a lot, financially. He helps with a lot but most of the time it’s on me to get her to school and get dinner ready

Mamas how are you making this work? Do you find something lower paying and that works around your child’s schedule? I want to obviously contribute but want to be there for our child as well.

My sweet girl has started daycare at my work. Every evening she is so tired and fussy and sad and it breaks my heart. It has only been a little over a week but seeing her like this is so sad. When I don’t have meetings, I come down to nurse her, when I can’t make it they give her a bottle. They say overall she is doing ok, but expectedly taking teeny naps. I just feel so bad working when I know she’s having a hard time and is so sad afterwards.

I return from mat leave for my first in a few weeks and am freaking out about how I will schedule everything in order to still be myself, spend time with my partner, and most importantly prioritize our baby. Here’s our situation:
-Husband works from home about 9-5
- I work from home M/F and am in office T-R. Hours are 8-5 and I have about a 45-60 minute commute.
- baby will be in full time daycare about 10-15 minutes from our house. Right now I am thinking I will handle most drop offs and my husband most pick ups
- we each travel a decent amount for work so there will also be a good bit of solo parenting happening those weeks for both
- baby starts bedtime around 7

Honestly I’m not sure how on earth I’m supposed to have quality time with my baby and prioritize other things (I have an out of the house rehearsal Wednesday nights from around 6:45-11 pm that I fear I will need to drop and I would like to workout most days as would husband). Not to mention keeping our home clean, cooking meals, and getting enough sleep.

How do you all do it?!!

I used to clean up the whole house after putting the kids to bed. Kitchen counters, toys, floors, everything. I couldn't relax until the place looked decent.
Now I just clear the dinner table, pick up anything that's in the way, and leave the rest for tmr. We got a robot vacuum recently too, so at least I don't have to deal with the floors myself every night. I'm too tired to spend my only quiet hour cleaning. Did anyone else lower their standards a bit after having kids?

My mat leave ends next week and I need advice on structuring my day (especially cooking and chores). I’m freaking out a little as my job is intense and competitive.

My Situation:

•  1 kid in preschool and a 6 month old
• I work from home; my husband works out of the house 9-5ish.
• A nanny is here from 9:30 AM–5:30 PM. She handles the kids' laundry and light housekeeping (like loading/unloading the dishwasher).
• I can log off around 4:30–5:00 PM, but I need to log back on M-Th to finish my work.
• With two kids now, we need to eat dinner by 5:30 PM to get our kindergartener to bed so he’s not tired for school the next day. We cook at home for health reasons, but I’m struggling to see when I’ll have time to make dinner and how to divide bedtime duties with my husband.

Please share your daily schedule. I’d love to see your routines or get any advice on meal prep and chores.

I am curious mainly to help my own guilt. I work full time and my husband is in medical residency so his schedule is very high demand and mostly unpredictable. I am the primary pick up and drop off and most things during this busy stage. Some days I need a little me time. I need to workout or do other things but I have this weird belief that I can only have my son in daycare while I work. WHY!!! Does anyone else feel that way? Do other parents have their kids in daycare for more than 8 hours. I don’t know what’s normal

I’m in the US. I have a very well paying job that offers really good maternity leave (about 6 months). I bring home about 50% of our income after medical insurance is taken out of my paycheck.

The question is, I’m 32 weeks pregnant. How am I supposed to come back to this job that I absolutely despise after I get 6 months off with my baby??
If money were no issue, I’d stay at home but that’s just not an option for us at this point.

How do you deal with the transition both the last month before maternity leave and also coming back from a long maternity leave??

I will soon graduate with an applied technology degree with an emphasis in computer science. I am not sure if this is what I want to do but I started it years ago and figured I’d finish it up while I am still eligible for FAFSA to cover the tuition.

Does anyone have any ideas for jobs I can do after graduation?

I have 3 - 4mo, 21 mo, and 4yr old and I’m in the trenches needing some hope. I love my flexibility and getting to be here for every moment but I am feeling very nervous about the future and my ability to enter the workforce.

Any suggestions or ideas help, or comfort 😭

Me and my husband are currently living with his parents and his older brother with our 9 months daughter. Both my in laws are retired and are very helpful , letting me sleep in, looking after her whenever we need to go out etc. my husband and I have office jobs and both very demanding sometimes incl. long hours. I’m looking to go back to work around March 2027, and we’re currently looking at houses to buy.

I’m keen to buy this property which is 8 mins walk from my in laws, 15 mins walk from station and also opposite my in-laws house there’s an amazing outstanding primary school I would like my daughter to go to and the area is generally really good and safe. However this house is 525k (I personally prefer it out of the other 20 or so houses we looked at) and my husband wants a house that’s under 500k (in case either one of us ever is to be made redundant, at least one of us can afford the mortgage) he also thinks we shouldn’t just buy a property just to be close to his parents and he’s telling me to just put my foot down at work and not work long hours so I can prioritise our daughter. (Easier said than done :/) he’s more keen at looking at properties which is still close by but like 15-20 mins drive away, where properties are around 475k, (crime rate is abit higher around this station) so incase we need their help we can drop her off, but I still feel like being walking distance will be much more beneficial for us for things like school pick ups and being with her grandparents until we finish work.

Idk I rather pay abit extra to be closer. I wanted mainly advice from other working mums - do you think it’s worth it?

How are WFH parents doing this?

My husband and I both have WFH jobs. My 3 y/o is home sick, but won’t do anything independently except watch TV. So one of us (me) is not getting any work done. I feel like a terrible parent just leaving them in front of the screen all day but I also don’t have any other options right now. Help?!

I truly need to vent and also hear how other people have managed this. My husband and I are trying to conceive now and of course the topic comes up with friends and even coworkers about babies and families, etc. When I share that we would love to have a family soon, I am met with the question of “Well do you plan to still work?”.
LIKE DUH??? I love job and I make great money. For context, I am in med device and my schedule is great and so is the pay. But I get frustrated because no one would ever ask a dad this. Or when I say that I do plan to work, everyone makes it seem like that’s the wrong answer. “They’re only small for so long” “You never get that time back” “If you can stay home then you should”. Why do we do this to women???? Why do I feel like I’m wrong for wanting to work????

And why when I say I love my job and want to work, the next response is “Well you might change your mind. Most women do when they have their baby” or “You say that now but you haven’t become a mom yet”.

Idk it’s so frustrating. I’m not saying going back to work will be easy or that I won’t miss my baby, but I’m allowed to not want to stay home and allowed to want a career.

How do you manage this? And why does it give me more anxiety about maternity leave and going back to work because everyone is telling me how much I WONT want to and how awful it’ll feel?

Last year, I lost my husband and needed a lot of help managing my home and keeping things together. My 3 neighbors and I share a nanny/house manager. It works well because I don't need a nanny, so I have her 6 hours a week. Together, we all add up to 50 hours, and she helps run all our lives beautifully. Because we live next to each other, it is easy to share her time.

I am now coping better, and honestly, her fee is not sustainable for me. It was worth it when I was in the trenches, but I can't keep affording it. I am struggling to let her go, though. She has really been my saving grace in a really hard time.

How much time is reasonable to give as notice? She has worked for me for a year. I'm so sick that I can't continue with her.

For those of you who hire cleaning services for your house, how often do you have them come? My husband is starting a new job that requires him to work way more, and he is also getting a new salary that finally allows us to outsource some cleaning. Since he will be working more, I really want to have them cover the deep cleaning so we can focus on quality time on the weekends, or bigger projects. In my mind, having them come weekly would be great, but it also seems like a lot of people do biweekly or monthly. I don't want to spend more money than I have to, but I also don't want to get stuck with all the cleaning on the in-between weeks if we did biweekly/monthly. Just curious what has worked well for others!