Just use the term you people, and for extra effect point at them while saying this.

What this does: it establishes that you people that are not the same as me, are different than me, making it clear that I notice this difference. It says "I know you people are different," and we're still here being different.

I had a fever, and he prescribed me more cowbell. I think he's an idiot. How do I find a qualified doctor these days?

and how the fuck did that conversation go?

Listen, I'm a strong independent man, who don't need no bodyguards. I do feel like I should be able to protect myself through armour though.

I wanna be safe from the usual suspects - playground bullies, surprise roundhouse kicks, katana slashes, the occasional drive-by AK47, and of course, passive-aggressive side eye.

Can you suggest some inconspicuous padding / armour that I can sneak into my typical habiliments (ranging from a wifebeater + board shorts, to a tuxedo) that serves my purpose without making me look like a total boob.

Sometimes i look in the mirror and think "damn, who is that fine fuck" and I realize it's me. Then i think about male me in another universe and know he'd crack ms the second we meet.

edit nos that i think about it, if we met then he'd be stuffing me with his meat mmmgfhhh idm if it's small im kinda petite and hella tight

Sometimesi just dont get it ,why am i so dense? What happened to me ?

Hello evryone,

My grandson is always talking about tokens and I believe he "needs" (how he'd put it) tokens. His birthday is on Friday. He'll be 21. I find it odd, the tokens, and I told his mum, but that is not the point. I've found some nice ones in Amazon and they are cheaper in red so I'd buy those unless the color is important. I don't know which game is it exactly and I'm not sure if it matters (?). I just remember that he needs them tokens.

Any young folk here knows what that game could be? I'd like to surprise him. Or any other idea for a boy that age?

Thank you for your help!

edit: he lives in the city, San Francisco, and I'd like to spend about 20-30 dollars.

I'm sick of hearing how AI is taking everyone's job. What can I do to be better than AI, so everyone hires me instead?

So what is it that you go daily pretending not to know, but you do....

As the title says, my SO snores like an angry rhino every night. I'm losing sleep and losing my mind!

I know his ex dumped a 5 gallon bucket of water on him while he was sleeping, but that didn't work, apparently.

Any ideas?

I already got some ideas:
- get a tapeworm
- get cancer
- get a stomach flu
- amputation

Which other ideas do you have?

I’ve had a brilliant idea

I’m going to post on Craigslist that people can pay me to let them spank me

I’ll charge $100 for 20 minutes and totally play the part

Kind of like a hooker, but instead of a sex fantasy, it’ll be a power trip/I’m too dumb to learn on my own so I have to a man spank me type fantasy

This is a great idea, right?

I’ve gotten more accomplished today than I have in the last year. Who knew I sell my ass without having to screw strangers? AND I can do it all while continuing to sit on my lazy ass 95% of the time

Brilliant

How can I make this idea work even betterer?

Sometimes they itch so bad i want to take a wire brush to my asshole😳

Is diy removal a bad idea ?

I saw a kit in the liquor store it comes with a shot of whiskey a razor blade and a mirror ☺️

What should i do ?

How do I get back at this mf’er and end this rivalry once and for all in my favor?

Men AND women of reddit, whats one lie women tell all the time??

So it's my wife's first time going to Rocky Horror tonight. She has asked me not to inform the cast that she is a Virgin.

On the one hand, I would love to see boobs again at some point. On the other hand, what kind of Rocky fan would I be if I didn't loudly announce "YO WE GOT VIRGIN OVER HERE"?

We got about 24 minutes before we reach the theater. So get your finger out of Colombia and give me some shitty advice.

Edit: my wife was very brave and voluntarily admitted it was her first time and was very funny in front of a packed theater full of strangers and I'm very proud of her.

I was researching my family tree on ancestry.com when I started entering both my wife's and my own information, and my wife came up as my sister. I guess we should have known considering we had the same last name and the same parents, but this really came as a shock to me. I haven't told her yet, but I need to know what I should say to soften the blow.

Yesterday this random girl on discord kept calling me a slut because I showed her online bf (her online bf is my online bsf that I haven't spoken to in weeks) screenshots of her calling me a slut and other stuff

The entire time i was thinking yea I'm into that and when I told her she blocked me

But then on a server some girl called me stupid and ugly and other stuff for no reason and I liked it

I think I'm into that (ima straight female)

edit when i was 14 the one friend i had abused me in front of everyone in school and no one did anything about it

• gave bred
• gave milk
• gave toy

Single fatter here. Baby still cry. What do??? How to make not cry????