How do you know without thinking that there is not connection potential with a person?

How to spot those who don’t drain but give back energy?

Is most of speaking waste of energy?

Are most people’s behaviour driven by their nerves?

Is most of talking people do for discharging anxiety?

Does any of you see that life is simply about living ?

Does any of you that your energy is like a forcefield against other’s emotional drama.

Does any one of you feel life is simple and there is not point to overthinking it. Best to drop ot and move on?

12 months ago I had a nervous system breakdown and now I see the world very different? Did this happen to anyone else ?

I am looking for people with similar perspective.

How to let this attachment fade away?

I finally felt seen by someone and i think i am somewhat attached to them…

How to deal with this ?

So i’m a student and my teacher supported me a lot through these few weeks in class (although she said it’s her job) and encouraged me a lot which i hardly ever have gotten in my life lol.

She noticed things No one ever noticed in me before. She said i was really good at noticing emotions and mirroring people’s emotions as well, and she knew i was very kind and empathetic even when we weren’t close and she wasn’t with me 24/7 every day int hose few weeks. As an Infj, i believe yall often hear peeps tell us we’re cold when we actually care very much. Shes an INTJ. Shes someone I extremely admire in terms of personality, her job, how she looks at stuff in life. Her job is literally the thing i wanted to do in life now and she gave me my spark back.

On my last day (im not gonna be in her class anymore), I gave her a very heartfelt card with everything i’m thankful and happy about, and said that I like her very much, and she said this encouraged her as well and offered to drive me home …then her husband which she was calling on the phone asked if I wanna come for dinner which I quickly said yes when she asked me…

they showed me their wedding pics and she gave me a book and letter as well and her number in the end, it was the happiest day ever, but i might miss her everyday now… How do yall deal with this..

I forgot to tell her that Im so glad and lucky to have spent more time with her that night when we said goodbye lol

Not gonna lie, it is exhausting trying to decipher motives in people’s conversations because so many people have hidden agendas and are trying to manipulate situations. I would love to be around people with no envy, hostility, or ulterior motives. Is that really too much to ask? 🤦🏾‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

Some empaths can communicate with the deads. I cannot but I would like to know how it does work.

If ghosts and reincarnation are two real phenomenons, how can they co-exist? Can a soul be both in a new body and in the limbs as a ghost? I would think that ghosts don’t exist, that the medium is communicating with a huge energy left in the past, caused usually by a trauma. Seems possible as Einstein used to say that past, present and future are an illusion. That time isn’t a straight line.

But… I have never heard of someone communicating with deads from the future.

So, please, how do you mediums feel like it works?

I realized that energy vampires always pulled towards to the light energies like a moth to a flame. Those might happened to you with one of the people you know.

• First stage is ''loveboming''. They become pretty interested in you and act like they're in the same mindset as you. But it's just for to gain your trust.
• Second stage is ''bread-crumbing & devaluing''. They devalue you so much or expects you to accept their ''bare minimum''. They compliment others, cut the interest they showed you at the first stage or barely shows it.
• Third stage is ''gaslighting''. Whenever you say what makes you uncomfortable with this person or speak your voice when they disrespect you, they always to blame you as if they did nothing wrong.
• Fourth stage is ''ghosting & power play''. They cut texting/communication or saying the simple ''hello'' when they saw you. They act like you're not even there. When they talk to you, it's always crossing your boundaries. With this way, they try to make you feel guilty and when you ask what is the problem, probably they won't be honest. They will always cross your boundaries and try to dominate you.

EXTRA:

They're looking for people who can benefit them, not genuine relationships. They claim to have empathy but do it for the show like ''Look how good person I am'' but they're far from being empathetic. They claim to be charming but people don't know them pretty well. They feed on people's misery. But usually, energy vampires are a fool. They're not good with senses. Their tricks might work on ordinary people but when they met a person who is immune to their manipulations, they lose themselves. They might try to gossip behind your back, do smear campaigns but when you still shine, they absolutely lose it. It is very easy to protect yourself one of them once you're aware of some things.

I can’t explain this feeling properly, but I’ve always been a sensitive person when it comes to other peoples suffering. If i got to know that Other person is going through pain especially physical (i don’t care about emotional) it effects me more than i can explain. Doesn’t necessarily have to be someone i know or close to, Just knowing that someone is hurting, struggling, feeling helpless, or going through something they don’t deserve makes me feel really sad. I get this urge to comfort them and talk to them and help them in my best way, just anything that could make them feel better. I don’t think it’s about wanting to save everyone or being a saint. I just find it difficult to emotionally detach myself from someone else’s pain, even when it’s something I have no control over.
I wonder if anyone else experiences this. How do you live with being this sensitive without letting other people’s suffering consume you ?

Not sure if anyone else has noticed this but I currently live in the Deep South ( Louisiana ) and arguably what people call the most “welcoming” Southwest region.

The only thing is that I’ve never encountered more neurotic, unhappy, paranoid, gossipy and invasive people in my life.

Every outing feels so intrusive with people constantly putting on an act and seemingly hyperaware of every little thing you do and say. Everything you do is criticized and people are seemingly salivating to talk about you the minute you turn your back.

My co-workers are obsessed with sharing their personal life and encroaching on my own.

I know everything about my co-workers personal lives when I really don’t want to.

One of the first things people will ask if who your family is to try and force this seeming closeness or familiarity that is so exhausting.

I took a trip to visit friends in DC the past month and it was like night and day. I’ve had people in Louisiana tell me northerners are rude/cold but what I found was far from It.

They were direct but nice when approached, everyone seemed to be able to stay in their own lane without having to be hyper aware of everyone else around them. No one felt invasive or left me feeling disgusting and drained after an encounter.

It solidified my choice in moving and I really can’t wait.

Is anyone else an old lady, like myself, who just discovered that she might be an empath? I mean, I've always been really good at "reading people and social cues." I'm pretty good at easing tense situations, breaking the ice, and making people laugh. I also really like uplifting others because it feels so damn good. I always thought it's because I flexed my social muscles so much throughout my 20s (I was a party kid), which is why I was good at those things.

But just now I'm watching the new Crystal Lake show, and a girl running through the woods steps into a deer trap, and it crushes her calf, and I literally get those shocks, the shiver up my back legs and butt like I always do when I see or hear about something so painful or visceral. And, woe, the wonders of the internet, I decide to Google what that sensation is called, and I learn it's part of being an empath.

Umm, whoa. What? (Suddenly something unlocked in my brain.)

And then I start asking why narcissists are always drawn to me... and then I'm hit with even more thoughts.

So, I've never wanted to call myself an empath. I have some female friends who proudly (and loudly) call themselves empaths, and it gives me the ick because I've instinctively felt that's not true. Their actions always reveal extreme emotional immaturity. I feel like calling myself an empath puts me in that same camp, like it's more self-gratuitous rather than true, and that's not what I want to be.

I'm pretty good at protecting my inner peace, though. So I feel that's a little misaligned for what it says about empaths. Emotional vampires try to suck my energy, but I feel like I can easily walk away or shift the conversation so they stop draining me.

But there's one thing I struggle with: allowing myself to feel my own emotions. Because when I do, it literally feels like my chest might crack open and I'll die. So I shove it all away and try to ignore it. Is this common for empaths or am I simply something else?

I have a lot of... thoughts. And questions. Thanks for reading. 🙂

I have a friend who i met when i was recovering from a dark place in my life. I find a lot of meaning in this friendship because I help them as they’re from a very rough background (no mother, abusive father, poverty, mother killed the previous child born etc). Speaking to this person always made me feel good and didn’t feel unease energy wise and they’re younger. I’m also very connected to this friend’s energy very intensely and I’ve felt it’s a good platonic friendship. I can always sense his energy and thoughts
But there have always been people on the outside who have had issues with my friend. My previous neighbour who was a witch found his energy “off” and “dangerous “ and had an issue with him coming over and even warned him. My flatmate with whom I don’t really have a dynamic has a problem with him due to “bad” vibes from him and now doesn’t want him to come over as he brings a lot of bad luck and he threatened with moving out if i called my friend over. His ex also had an issue because he was open about his family to me. A colleague was always jealous of my friendship as she had a fall out with her friend at the time. Two of my other friends also did not like his vibe.
I’ve always felt good energetically (never felt drained )speaking to this friend yet I’ve had to face so many challenges trying to be in his life. I can objectively say that his life has improved after he’s been my friend. I’ve not had bad luck in my life personally after this person became my friend but I’ve had to deal with so many people giving me grief and very intensely so.

Lots going on in the world right now. Two events happened I feel like this energy is just so merky right now. Woke up late felt extremely drained. I went to work for a bit then just came home because I wasn’t feeling good either way. Now I have no desire to leave the house till it improves

I notice everything. And honestly, it’s kinda disheartening sometimes, having a mind that picks up on things I wish I didn’t have to notice. It’s a blessing the good Lord gave me, but sometimes I wonder if it’s a blessing I’m still learning how to carry.

I notice the little things. The changes in people’s behavior, the difference between their words and their actions, the intentions behind certain moves. I notice when something doesn’t add up, when someone’s energy changes, and when people think they’re getting over on me.

And the crazy part is, a lot of the time, I don’t even say anything.

I just watch.

Not because I’m stupid. Not because I’m oblivious. And definitely not because I don’t know how to stand up for myself. Sometimes I genuinely want to see how far somebody is willing to go when they think nobody sees what they’re doing.

I want to see what’s really in a person’s heart when they have the opportunity to do right without anybody forcing them to. I want to know if their morals mean something to them when there’s no consequence for doing wrong. I want to see how much of God is actually in somebody’s heart when doing the right thing requires them to sacrifice something, tell the truth, or treat somebody fairly when they could easily do otherwise.

Because it’s easy to talk about God. It’s easy to preach about being a good person. It’s easy to put on a good image when everybody is watching.

But what do you do when you think nobody notices?

That’s what interests me.

Sometimes I’ll allow somebody to show me exactly who they are when I could’ve stopped the situation before it ever got to that point. And I’ve had to question myself about that because I know how it can look from the outside. It can come across as manipulative, like I’m setting people up to fail some test they don’t even know they’re taking.

And maybe sometimes there’s a lesson in that for me, too.

Because if I already recognize something isn’t right, why am I allowing it to continue just to see how far somebody will take it?

Am I looking for understanding, or am I looking for confirmation of what I already believe about them?

That’s something I’ve been reflecting on.

I think part of me just wants to understand people. I want to understand how somebody can look you in your face, talk about loyalty, love, honesty, and God, and then turn around and move in a way that contradicts everything they claim to stand for.

I want to understand how people justify certain things to themselves. How they can hurt somebody and still convince themselves they’re the good guy. How they can know the difference between right and wrong but still choose whatever benefits them in the moment.

And maybe that’s why I observe so much. I’m trying to understand the heart behind the action.

But I’m learning that understanding people doesn’t mean I have to keep putting myself in positions to be hurt by them.

I can have discernment and still establish boundaries. I can give somebody grace without giving them unlimited access to me. And I can forgive somebody without pretending I didn’t see what happened.

I’m not perfect, and I’m not claiming to be some holy man who has everything figured out. I’ve got my own flaws, my own battles, and things God is still working on in me.

But I do believe there’s a responsibility that comes with the way I see things.

I’ve always felt like I’m supposed to help people in some capacity. To recognize things that might help somebody grow, to guide when I can, and to understand people beyond what they show on the surface.

In my heart, I see myself as a shepherd of men. Not because I’m better than anybody, but because I believe God calls some of us to help others find their way, even when we’re still trying to find our own.

And being a shepherd doesn’t mean judging everybody. It means having enough love to care about people, enough wisdom to recognize when something isn’t right, and enough humility to understand that you can be wrong, too.

I know I don’t know everything. I know my observations don’t automatically make my assumptions true. And I know God sees things in people’s hearts that I’ll never be able to see.

But I also believe we’re supposed to pay attention to the fruit people produce, not just the words coming out of their mouths.

At some point, actions have to mean something.

And I think one of the hardest things about being somebody who notices a lot is learning when to speak, when to stay quiet, when to give grace, and when to remove yourself from a situation altogether.

Because sometimes I see the good in people so clearly that I want to give them room to become better, even when their current actions are showing me something different.

Sometimes I understand why somebody might be the way they are, and that understanding makes it harder for me to hold them accountable.

But understanding why somebody does something doesn’t automatically make what they did right.

And having a good heart doesn’t mean I have to keep letting people take advantage of it.

I don’t want to become so focused on seeing what’s in everybody else’s heart that I neglect what’s happening in my own.

That’s the part I’m trying to get right.

I want to be able to recognize wrongdoing without becoming bitter. I want to be able to see through people’s actions without thinking everybody has bad intentions. I want to be able to stand up for myself without feeling like I’m going against the same grace I believe God has shown me.

And most importantly, I don’t want to confuse being a man of God with being a man who has to tolerate everything.

Jesus showed love, but He also spoke the truth. He showed compassion, but He wasn’t afraid to confront hypocrisy. He served people without making their approval the measure of His worth.

That’s something worth thinking about.

Maybe part of my growth is realizing that I don’t have to let somebody do me wrong just to see if they’ll choose to do right. Maybe sometimes the lesson isn’t in watching how far they’ll go, but in recognizing what I’ve already seen and having the courage to respond accordingly.

Because I can’t control what’s in somebody else’s heart. I can’t make somebody honest. I can’t force somebody to have integrity. And I can’t love somebody into becoming a person they’re not willing to work toward being.

All I can do is make sure my own actions line up with what I claim to believe.

So call me the bad guy if you want. Think I’m naive because I give people chances. Think I’m calculated because I stay quiet and observe.

I know I’m still figuring things out.

But I’m trying to become a man who can see the truth without using it against people, love people without abandoning himself, and walk in faith without believing he’s responsible for saving everybody.

I want to be a shepherd, not a judge. I want to lead by example, not by control. And I want to have enough discernment to recognize when God is calling me to be patient and when He’s giving me the wisdom to walk away.

Because there’s a difference between being able to see what’s happening and knowing what you’re supposed to do about it.

And maybe the real blessing isn’t just being able to notice what other people miss. Maybe it’s learning how to carry that awareness without letting it turn your heart cold.

I’m curious if anybody else thinks like this.

Have you ever caught on to something but stayed quiet because you wanted to see how a person would move when they thought you didn’t know?

Have you ever struggled with the difference between giving people grace and allowing them to take advantage of you?

And how do you know when your silence is wisdom versus when you’re just avoiding a conversation you know you need to have?

Because I’m learning that just because I can see something doesn’t mean I have to sit there and watch it happen.

Sometimes the lesson is in what other people choose to do.

And sometimes the lesson is in what God is trying to teach me about myself through it.

Sent from my iPhone

It's so common to see someone and relate their appearance to some celebrity. And the most common thing to say to that person is "omg, you remind me of _____________."

The problem: I think the natural internal response from many recipients is to think that you're saying that they're a lesser copy of that celebrity.

The solution: I forget where I learned this, but it's way more appropriate to tell people, "you know who reminds me of you?"

With this subtle change in language you're reversing roles and saying the person you're talking to is Prime, and the celebrity is Secondary.

I'm not just making this up. Since I've adopted this method, I've used it for years and at least a couple people have specifically taken note and thanked me for saying it this way instead of the other way. I never expected it to be something that people would consciously note, but the fact it causes a clear conscious response I think makes it clear it's the better method.

I really don't know why, but I cannot stop thinking about this.

I understand how empaths can feel drained just by being around someone carrying heavy, unsettling, uncomfortable emotions. But I can't help feeling for the ones who are avoided because of those very emotions, which, of course, can be overwhelming and draining for the people around them, too.

Maybe it's because I'm someone who can relate to both sides.

Lately, I've been keeping more to myself until I'm at least in a better place emotionally. I guess I don't want to burden anyone with things I'm still trying to work through myself.

And that makes me sad, because I wonder how many others are doing the same.

Does anyone else find it really intense to look people in the eyes? Especially people you haven’t met yet. It feels very intimate to me. Once I get to know someone, it gets less intense, but at first it can be overwhelming.

I keep a small battery vacuum in my storage unit for convenience. Today I went to use it it felt really heavy, so I dumped it out there was lots of trail mix looking food and fluff. When I dumped it out into a trash bag there was a little mouse looking up at me. I feel terrible about destroying their home/ food supply for the winter. They must have worked so hard to stockpile all that and I ruined it all in a matter of seconds.

Any living being human or animal.

Someone said "everyone is you but in a different body" and now I'm so aware of sonder and it's just so overwhelming. I need everyone to be okay or I can't be.

What do you all do for work?

It seems just clocking in, working, and then leaving isn't a possible thing.

I'm trying to figure out what else to do that's solitary.

I saw a video of someone saying “it was just a small grease fire for us, but the end of the world for them” and then it shows a dead grasshopper or something, that died in the fire. Of course that’s a brutal way to go out. But i’m not even sure if bugs have nerves or pain receptors? Can bugs even feel scared? It’s just hard for me to imagine feeling empathy for a bug. Especially when they’re in my house at times lmao

Im in a shut down, bordering agoraphobia. Its nothing new, ive been here before, but this is bad. Theres so many people who dont understand what being a true empath feels like. Describing it can sound like a mystical autistic with a mental disorder. You know, randomly someone pops up in your head and you know theyre not ok (and everyone wonders how you knew they needed a friend), people emotionally dump their entire truama history on you sometimes before even knowing your name, crowds can be overwhelming and places like say casinos are always followed up with an isolation regulation day.

I am so used to the daily wave of energy around me that I forgot what the tsunami of emotions does when my feelings come into play.

I call it THE SHUT DOWN.. I go from an extra hour of sleep to not getting off the couch or answering the phone. Im so overwhelmed by human connection, this is the first acknowledgement in days that Im not ok.

Does anyone else go thru this? I would love to hear what other people do to help regulate when the energy paralyzes you. Everyone calls it a gift when an intuitive person comes to take the weight off their shoulders, but when our cup overflows and no one to help lighten the load people call it depressikn.

I know its not depression and someone has a tip for getting out of this unmotivated freeze.

My husband is currently going through something extremely tough with his family and it’s breaking my heart to see him so sad

There’s going to be times coming when all the family are going to be together and I want to be strong and support my husband, but I instantly feel all his grief and can barely stop myself from crying, one the tears start I can’t get them to stop. I don’t want him to have to worry about comforting me on top of everything

Any tips on how to stop crying so easily so I can be there for my husband

I don’t mean a friend or someone close, because then that would make sense. I found out someone I briefly dated and was friends with did something awful that is 100% their fault and now they’re facing repercussions, but I can’t help but feel bad for them anyway? And I feel sick to my stomach, as if it was happening to me.