I don’t understand why half of the people I’ve met in this life have made it their duty to treat me horribly as I’m an empath and very sensitive and always looking out for people and making them comfortable around me

It started with my friends as teens it was like a trio friendship and all of a sudden the other girl pushed me away and got close to the boy because she didn’t like that I was closer to him than her. Meanwhile the boys parents are renting my parents duplex and I live opposite and she lives like 20 minutes walk away and my mom is a pastor and we all go to same church and I met her first.

In university I met this room mate who would just switch moods and not talk to me or talk to me like I’m bothering her whenever she was maybe having a bad day. Sometimes I don’t even know why.

Same uni when I moved into an apartment with 2 of my friends I could tell they were each other’s favourite maybe because they were from the same state and they would hide things from me especially the boy and at some point they were dating which I didn’t care because I was rooting for them but they kept manipulating me to think they weren’t. I could feel the favouritism and I was so naive until it got me depressed and I kept asking why always me and I moved out only for them to finally open up to me that they know they were treating me bad and they are sorry and I forgave them.

I also had female friends in different class in uni who would prefer to speak to the other friend than me pushing me away. Meanwhile I would tell them all everything because I dislike favouritism and won’t do it to someone else.

Now living with my partner when it was just us I could always feel the love but now we have 2 kids together. It started from Postpatum. The tension and misunderstandings and disagreement and now it’s like anytime I say something he always attacks me. He says I don’t know how to speak which I know sometimes out of anger, I speak to blame the other person. It’s funny that we could be watching a show and he’s be like oh this person has a funny personality and I do have same but when i portray that, he just has a problem with me or how I speak but other people speak same way and he’s like I should walk on how I speak to him when we have misunderstandings.

And then the worst of it, he could wake up and be in a bad mood for no reason and that causes him to talk to me some way when we speak like in a rude or “you’re bothering me way” I know now he’s not financially stable and it bothers him because he has to provide for our kids. Yes he’s a provider and solves our needs but sometimes he treats me like I don’t exist like my emotions don’t matter.

I could be having a hard day and 90% of the time he doesn’t know how to comfort me. But I’ll always try to comfort him and sometimes when he gets in that mood he won’t talk to me but his family will call or he’d call his family and talk to them to feel better and he gets happy again.

So I’d like to understand that as partners if your partner can’t make you happy then is there any need? Because even when I try to comfort him he feels like I’m bothering him.

I’m genuinely tired of people who make me feel this way. It’s like a curse and I don’t know what to do. These days I’m focusing more on myself but I can’t help but to be distracted at times.

How do I find happiness again please!
Without letting someone’s bad day ruin mine even when they put it on me.

I’m struggling more because I live in a separate continent from my mom. I lost my Dad and brother and my mom is the only person I have now. My partner and 2 kids are my only family here and also struggle to make friends because it’s same cycle and I’m afraid if being the outcast again.