I'm medicated, but I've had a couple of experiences recently (see previous posts) which could indicate going into an episode. I shouldn't bc I'm medicated, but it is spring, so I dunno. I'm terrified and there's prominently the concept of 'if I do go into another episode I should just off myself so it never happens again' in my brain, which is dumb because I know I can't do that, but there is definitely that fear present.

So how to manage this fear? I know it's only semi-rational, but it's not easy to manage and I feel like I'm regressing fast back to where I was before medication.

Hello everyone, this is the first time I’ve posted anything on this subreddit; I just want to let off a bit of steam.

I’m 22 years old, I’m a man, and I live in a country where mental health care isn’t exactly a priority, but I do have a good family support network.

(I’ve been on lithium for three years, by the way.)

I’m writing this whilst I’m in a state of ‘manic withdrawal’.

Things have been going well for me recently. (but I think it is because I am coping very well) We’re talking about a period of three months, but even so I feel empty and turn to alcohol to silence my thoughts; but for today (just today) I wanted to take some time to think about my mental shit.

Five months ago, I got out of a toxic relationship that lasted nearly three years. But two months ago I met a woman with whom I’m in a ‘situationship’, but I’m really scared of showing her who I really am, or of whether I only like her because I’m in a manic phase; whatever the case, I don’t want to hurt her.

Sorry if the message I’m trying to get across gets lost – I haven’t had enough sleep for 4 days

I Had a lot in mind, so sorry.

I was taking Unichem brand and the VA sent Cadista brand.... I was doing great on the Unicbem but thw cadista sjit, I am not doing well. Anyone have bad luck with Cadista? Does anyone take actual name brand lamictal? Or just lamotragine

how do you deal with seasonal depression? doesn’t affect you and your mood swings?

Anyone else with bipolar and ocd who can chime in?

Menopause and Bipolar??

Im 50 and have never talked about menopause to anyone. I've got no friends to talk to bc theyre all younger than me, my mom had a hysterectomy at 40 so no help there either. I had an endometrial ablation 7yrs ago and never had menstruation afterwards.

I cant count my 12mo of no periods bc I have none. Right now ive got a few symptoms that could be bipolar related.

Im at my wits end. I have bipolar disorder and have been stable for decades....some of the sx overlap of course. I've stopped sleeping thru the night bc I wake up wet in bed 3-4x per night...my shrink prescribed sedatives..ive gained a lot of weight in a couple months. The GP wanna put me on injectables for weight....my psych wont touch it bc "i dont do anything medical" i have dry vagina so badly i feel like a virgin every time.and incontinence, sometimes it feels like my urethra is tight and I can only dribble, body odor that I've never had before, sensitive teeth, dry eyes, and anxiety that ive never had.

The parts that are the same for bp1 and menopause as follows.....

Lack of focus, poor concentration, headaches, dizziness, balance control, falls, dry mouth, trouble swallowing, anxiety, restless legs, general restlessness. 🥺

Can anyone out there relate?? Anyone with a mental illness that's going/gone thru this?? I could use a shoulder

Please? 😭

The other night I all of a sudden heard a lower frequency humming. It wasn’t the tinnitus that I m used to. It scared me so badly. I awoke my husband to see if he heard it. He didn’t and threatened to go to another bedroom because I woke him. He didn’t but I knew I had to deal with it on my own.

I realize this could be due to my bp1, but I googled if anyone else had been hearing a low humming noise in the area and found several websites that document where there is a humming. Obviously, these occurred in the most populated areas. But also elsewhere, how do I know if it is physical or mental?

I’ll keep this as readable as possible; I’m currently undiagnosed after over a decade of seeking mental health help from my GP (first appointment 2013). I’m 34F, and while I’ve consciously not self-diagnosed, potential bipolar is an option that’s been thrown out there by the mental health nurse (I’m currently in a long waiting list to see a psychiatrist.

I’ve been experiencing cyclical highs and lows since 2012, the first high was that year and the pendulum has been swinging ever since. For the first time, I felt heard by a GP two Fridays past, and he made a psychiatric referral when I called, but advised it could be up to 12 months before I speak to someone, and to see the mental health nurse in the interim. This GP is the first ever to ask me for examples of the behavioural terms I described. I find myself at times buying a new pair of shoes, and wondering what strange places they’ll see me impulsively end up in.

Being heard helped energise me to sit down and actually map out a timeline of how I felt and when, and looking at the result it isn’t hard to see why the mental health nurse asked if I suspect a potential bipolar disorder. I’d never really considered how important it was to describe what I meant by high and low, and I only ever saw the GP when I was down. At that stage I’d consciously avoided trying to self diagnose, and whilst I still am, it seems sensible to me to try to understand coping strategies that exist while I await my appointment with a psychiatrist.

When I’m in an ‘up’ I’m extremely productive, I feel good, I’ve historically disengaged with antidepressant therapy and at some point along the way, this behaviour is catalysed into out of character grandiose behaviour, at times I feel like I’m a porous membrane away from believing I’m a femme fatale in an early 90s thriller.

When I’m in a ‘down’ I’m more than likely physically horizontal, spending weekends under a blanket in bed or on the sofa, snipping at my partner and friends, and unable to see any point in a future. I experience passive suicidal ideation, and I can’t remember the last week that passed when it didn’t enter my periphery at least once. I lose all self interest, and look and sound like a different person.

What do you do, if anything, in your everyday life to try to manage the highs and lows, and the resulting impact on loved ones? I’d love to learn about any coping strategies you have now and maybe those you used in the lead up to diagnosis too. Whatever this is, it’s run amuck in my life and almost destroyed everything I’ve built several times, I just want to try to gain some semblance of control.

Thank you for reading all of this if you made it this far, sincerely, I appreciate any advice you can give.

I've posted already earlier sorry sorry I just was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to stop thinking something is a Sign for oneself. Or that sort of thing. It's beginning to scare me cause they're also advising me to do things. Not seriously yet at all and I'm super good at ignoring commands bc I've had them for ages, I just don't like it. It's just the kinda vague you should take all those pills or you should drink that, not genuinely serious like compelling me or anything just it's beginning to not be me thinking that stuff again. I've been there before but I wasn't medicated then. It's still very ignorable but the possibility of it getting worse is kind of stressful. I know taking all those pills/drinking that, as in the examples, won't hurt me, I've known that for a while, but I still don't want to do those things adn it's stressing me out. I know I'm just getting anxious over what is practically not much at all, but it's kind of weird how my brain has just ... shifted in the last week or two? The Signs thing, it's not loads of times it's just happened a few times. It's weird how it's become the first thought even though I don't know what they're signs of or anything, they're just... I dunno, the world is filled with things for me to interpret.

Again though I know perfectly well that I'm overreacting and stressing over stuff that is functionally very little, it's just reminding me of times that were horrible. If I hadn't had that in the past I wouldn't eb scared as I am now with the tiny things.

So please help me :) thanks. I can elaborate more in commetns etc. and I've been around the place for a bit sorry. A few times you know. Thanks in advance!

Ever since going psychotic a couple years back, I am super triggered by little noises and little touches from like my hair a or tag poking me in the back of the neck.

During my episode, I heard guttural voices and thought someone was able to touch my back, like draw a hand up or down my back, because they could travel between dimensions. Anybody else lose their minds so bad that the memories echo the terrors on a frequent basis?

disclaimer: I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 but have only ever had a couple true manic episodes so i’m not sure if that is enough to actually have bipolar 1 bc I do get hypomanic. Sorry, I’m still trying to figure this out.

Hi guys! I really wanna keep smoking weed but I have bipolar2 and get mania occasionally. Does anyone have any experience with this? How did you keep smoking but also maintain good mental health? For more context I smoked for about 3 years before taking a year long break due to my anxiety getting really bad. I can start smoking for a little even up to a whole year but at that point I start feeling weird? Like a little off. Anyways thanks in advance.

my mom has always had bipolar disorder as far as i can remember, and i was diagnosed too about a year ago. after many episodes, finally getting a diagnosis and starting treatment felt hopeful. i am not naming any medication names due to the rules but after trying a few combinations i was put on a very high medication regimen with high doses of two different antipsychotics, one ir and the other both ir and xr, one atypical antipsychotic, and two different atypical antidepressants for sedation, alongside an snri i was already taking for my fibromyalgia.

i actually started becoming better. there were some side effects, notably weight gain, but that was expected and i didn't think much of it, because my life was finally getting better.

then i went into a coma.

i do have a history of diabetes in my family, but my blood levels had always been normal before. despite that, all those medications led to develop medication induced secondary type 2 diabetes and go into a diabetic coma. i was hospitalized in the icu for a while, where they cut me off basically every medication except the one mild antipsychotic i was on, and my snri, then they cut that antipsychotic off as well.

i was encouraged to track my mood, and my mom took care of me for a few months. i had to miss the final month of my university semester as my university was in a different city and they really didn't want me to be alone, which is fair.

my blood levels have since stabilized, and i have no suspicion of any diabetes or anything left anymore. i am trying to manage. i had gained 30 kilograms in half a year and i have managed to lose 5 in the past 3 months. i cannot be prescribed any antipsychotic anymore given my history, and i am suspecting im manic again. im considering checking myself into inpatient care.

what im heavily encouraging is for you all to track your weight gain and blood glucose levels. if i hadn't slacked off and got my levels checked, my coma might have been prevented.

I’m writing a story based around a boy with bpd. My story aims to represent bpd and spread awareness. I personally do not have bpd, so I was hoping anyone to educate me or suggest aspects of bpd that you feel aren’t represented enough in media.

hx psychosis. Been very stable I don't know if you've seen my previoius posts. but the last few days things are shifting and I'm starting to think about those things again I don't know why I think I'm just freaking out for no good reason but also why are they coming back to me why am I thinking that sort of stuff again?? I'm not psychotic I can't be psychotic I absolutely refuse and also it literally doesn't fit because if anything it's just that my anxiety is acting up randomly. I don't know. I have zero triggers having happened or anything it's just that the stuff is coming back to me I don't know fi that makes sense sorry. I'm just scared. I cried earlier for no good reason. I occasionally have to look around to see if I'm watched. I can't settle to writing or anything which is frustrating. I see things that are clearly Signs but I don't know what thye're signs of I can't explain it either i just know like I found money on the ground the other day and I saw a post that was clearly targeted to me specifically and I don't know what else but I know things have been happening. Things are shifting. But I'm super stable I don't understand what or why this is happening.

I'm honeslty blowing this all out of proportion I KNOW i am. I wish I could talk to my dad he would know but I don't even know what I'd tell him about or talk to him about. I'm not psychotic, like definitionally I mean it's not just me being in denial, it's more pseudopsychotic anxiety but I don't kno w why it would be appearing now literally out of nowhere.

Sorry I don't know how to explain my question just. How do I know what I need to tell to people, you know? How do I communicate? I mean how do I know if things are going wrongcompared to just I'm a bit stressed even though i don't know WHY im stressed I don't understand and everyone is making no sesnse lately people are thinking things that are different to what I think and it doesn't make sense and thinking is maybe a touch harder than it was? I Mean it was really good for a while but it feels like the last week or something I don't know it's different. I'm not manic I know I'm not manic, I'm also not depressed for sure I'm just scared I don't know??? and I don't know why???? why the random Fears how do I stop this how do I be safe I absolutely REFUSE to be psychotic I refuse to do my placement if I'm anything at all I did my last placement while off my rocker a bit and that was kind of bad even though it went really well (nursing placement). Placememnt starts at start of next month so things have to be stable by then. I mean I think I'm stable but I don't understand why my brain is doing this do you know what I mean? I don't know how to know anything sorry I don't know how to explain myself either does this make sense?

I'm literally fine but the anxieties decided to visit me and I don't know why I don't get it I can't summarise I'm sorry. this post really sounds way more serious than it actually is but i dont know.

I want my dad but he's in a different country until late JANUARY :( I could message him but I don't know what I'd say or how. I was scared when they left because I kind of mentally depend on my parents being able to show up but obviously I can't ask him to come home because my siste rin another country needs mum and dad right now to help with her new baby. (I'm an aunty yayyyyy she is the cutest baby everrrrrr) I just want ot talk to dad but I don't knwo what about and I want one of dad's hugs I feel like that would set me up real good

everyone thinks the different things and I don't get it I'm fine but they say Im not and then all this I don't know I don't GET it like Iknow I'm not manic, I'm not depressed, and I'm not psychotic but my brain is fucking me over. how do I knwo what do i do sorry i dont know if this all makes sense please help me :( I'm not in crisis or anything just kind of I don't knwo.