I have been out for 7 years, though the first 3 my family member refused to use my name. I don’t see them often at all, like I probably haven’t seen them in 3-4 years either. They are going to visit to celebrate an accomplishment of mine in which they will meet all of my new friends in the completely new life that I built. If they mess up my pronouns I would be upset, though all my current friends know I’m trans already. I flat out do not want my deadname used, I have worked hard for no one to know what my deadname is. In fact, I literally won’t invite this family member (parent) to visit and meet my friends if they don’t have the capacity to not deadname me. After 7 years, literally like a quarter of my life I have been out and used this name. Am I unreasonable to have this boundary / expectation? They are saying I am expecting them to be perfect and not make an honest mistake….. My thoughts are that I have worked really hard to accomplish some really big goals to celebrate the life I made and I don’t want my parents inability to use my actual name from ruining a celebration of accomplishments I achieved in spite of how horribly I was treated at the time (we only recently talk again)

I've recently gotten into crochet and have been looking for ways to support the hobby. I don't care much about actually profiting as much as I do making enough to buy another skein of yarn haha. So I've been shuffling ideas in my head of small things I could make and sell locally for a slow trickle of income. Among these ideas are various pride flag themed items. Keychains, pins, charms, etc. But I also want to be respectful. I couldn't find any opinions on this topic, so here I am to ask. Would you consider this to be an okay thing to do?

Hi! I'm someone who, less than four months ago, discovered I was trans (mtf), but I have a problem. I don't know if I've truly "discovered" it. Of course, I love the idea of *being* a woman, but the process scares me a lot, especially the fear of regretting it and rushing into things only to regret it later. I've always been somewhat feminine and hate when my beard grows, but what if, in the future, when I start the transition, I'm not happy with who I see in the mirror? Besides, lately I feel like it's not worth being trans, because I'll never be able to look good, feeling ugly, seeing how the hair on my legs and arms reminds me of the biological reality I'm living, and knowing that even if I transition, I'll still feel ugly. Being man sucks, but it's the body I've been used to all these years, not to mention how much my family would hate me if they found out I was trans. Idk, i hate not being able to figure this out

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Tw: conversion therapy and it effects

I'm a trans man, and puberty was already traumatic because I had a lot of dysphoria, but I think conversion therapy was one of the worst things.

It wasn't exactly in exodus or similar companies, but it was mostly at home, church and with my parents.

For me It involved listening to homophobic sermons, being told you would burn in hell, being compared to sex offenders, being told you were a danger to your siblings, being exorcised, having your ears pierced after your attempt, Being threatened with having your clothes burned, being exorcised, and being told that you would die young and God would never let you live the life you wanted. Not to mention being told that if your parents died and everything else goes wrong, it was your fault.

I've had several things happen since then.

The first thing is that I get anxious when I find out someone is evangelical, and many times when I have to go to evangelical churches I feel desperate to go out and lock myself in the restroom and start crying.

Many times I start to feel dirty and worse than a pedophile in church. As if I were the most disgusting and wrong thing in the world. I also feel this way during moments when I experience dysphoria, wish I had a dick, or want a girlfriend and to have sex. I feel like I'm a disgusting pervert and a filthy sinner.

At one point I prayed to die and for anyone in a similar situation to die because it was so horrible. I was terrified to see babies and anything close to me happening. I remember praying every day for God kills me and doesn't send me to hell. Then came the panic attacks where I was sure I was going to die, that God would kill me, and I had panic attacks over anything.

I had nightmares where I was being exorcised again. They were intense enough that I was able to scream at the top of my lungs in the dream. These days, they've shifted to crises where I start feeling awful or there's a trigger, I start crying, hitting myself, shaking, screaming for hours, almost vomiting, sometimes I get aggressive. It takes me hours to calm down.

During my last crisis, my mother talked about "asking God to take this away from me," and I automatically started hitting my head and yelling, "Take it away from me!" or "Get out of my head!". Now I've noticed that the first time I was exorcised and they were praying for me to be "fixed," I acted in a very similar way when they told me to repent.

I'd like to know if people who have undergone conversion therapy have similar reactions, or if you experienced different post-conversion effects, and how you dealt with them or have any tips for dealing with it.

Yes, I'm working towards financial independence and trying therapy. Don't worry 🫪

I’ve been considering transitioning for about 7 months and there are so many moments in my life where I wished I was a girl. Whether that’s clothing/appearance, social identity, etc. I feel like if someone had offered me a chance to restart my life to become a girl, then I would 100 percent take it. But at the same time I would be okay with not transitioning and staying a boy for the rest of my life.

Hi everyone. I'm a 46 year old trans woman and I guess this question is for all of the other trans women around my age that have been on feminizing HRT for over two years. I just crossed my 1½ year mark and my progress isn't as good as I was hoping. Do all the major changes stop around the two year mark? Does it continue at a slower pace? Or does it not follow the charts they show for expectancy timeline for changes? Any kind of idea of what I'm looking at is appreciated. You can indulge me by being specific if you want.

I am currently 16 MTF and I'm thinking about how I should go trough with my transition, should I wait till I'm 18 and do it legally with a early psychiatric evaluation (most likely when I'm 17). I fear that with all the push I get from other trans people especially from DIY'ers that me doing it at 18 is "considered" too late. But then I also fear of getting under dosed. Is it over?

How common is this,

Having a great day, full fem energy, being a absolute baddie in mind then mirror 🪞 then depressed about reality.

I mean it for mtf who are not out yet.

Folks who view pre-op / natal anatomy differently than post-op body parts or the anatomy somebody has as a result of HRT. People who apply a different inherent value to one vs the other or just apply different rules to someone’s “natural” biology. Or use language that still “others” non-cisnormative bodies.

It is NOT bioessentialism. And most often done WITHIN trans communities seemingly as a way for people to distant themselves from binary, cisnormativity without fully unpacking their own internalized bias.

Some examples:

People who say “bodies don’t have genders” and “no body part is inherently masculine/feminine” but describe phalloplasty/metoidioplasty and vulvoplasty and “masculinizing” and “feminizing” surgeries. If a vulva doesn’t inherently make a body more feminine why does adding a vulva “feminize” someone? And viceversa for penises? And why would adding a penis “masculinize” a body if having a penis doesn’t inherently make a body more masculine? Unless I’m missing something it just seems like different logic is being applied to non-op vs post-op genitals.

Also people who say “girld!ck” and “boy₽ussy” who would never say “girl₽ussy” and “boyd!ck” regardless of what you think of any of those terms. Idk maybe a bit of a stretch but it reminds me of folks who say “ethical nonmonogamy” but don’t say “ethical monogamy”.

Why are masc / butch women labeled “feminine” but only if they are trans? Why are feminine men labeled “masc” but only if they’re trans? Even if they never use those labels for themselves? When that would not be the case if the person had been assigned the gender the identity with from birth? If men aren’t inherently “masculine” (unless they themselves ID and present that way) and viceversa for women, and if gendering someone based on their assigned sex at birth is wrong, why are all AFAB folks who are trans categorized as “transmasc” regardless of whether they actually identify with masculinity? And vice versa for AMAB trans folks. That just sounds like inverting bioessentialist ideas that AFAB “must be” feminine and AMAB “must be” masculine.

I may edit this post later and add more examples but y’all get the point lol

Idk, I just feel like it is. Personally, I see this as disrespectful to other pronouns preferred by the person being addressed. I wanted to ask people with experience about this.

Hi 👋 I’m Katelyn (Katie for short) and I’ve been on hrt for about four months but I wanna ask about fat redistribution like I’ve been exercising more and trying to watch what I eat but I don’t know if it’s really making a difference I achieved the goals I want should I be doing something like following a diet plan of some kind or a specific exercise routine I should follow

were you on medicaid?? did you get it done at denverhealth?? did it heal alright??

Hi all, I am a trans guy currently on testosterone and I also have a nexplanon implant, due to these factors I haven’t gotten my period for about 6 months. Last week I missed my shot by a couple of days and couldn’t get a refill for my hormones because my pharmacy was out, but I did end up getting it and doing my shot a few days later than my scheduled date (I missed my weekly shot on Monday but was able to do it on Thursday) this week, my period came back. Is this normal?

Mods, feel free to delete if this is like against the rules. I will mention some NSFW topics; but this is a throw-away account and due to rules in my country I'd need to show my ID to be able to put the flair as NSFW, and I'm not doing that. Thus, a "SPOILER" flair should be sufficient.

Enough said. For context, I am AFAB, and I'm currently questioning wheter or not I may be a trans man.

Background wise; as a child I did have solid female role models, I often read books about notable women from history and stuff. However, up until like? I'd say around until age 12, I had a raging hatred for my own name. It was mostly because it is a rare one, though even now I get slightly annoyed by it — probably because I only associate it with my boring IRL life?

Most notably though, I have never really fit in. Both because I am generally a bit weird (plus I used to have quite a temper), I really don't know how to socialize and I am what some may consider as chronically online; my interests have never been anything normal and so and so.

But even more I am, to put it mildy, a fair bit of ugly, since I was born. I really hate my face especially, I feel like it is too "folded" or maybe my face is too square or just whatever. I am also fat and have been since young, while right now it dosen't really bother me I know that people will always judge me for this and it just makes me feel like more of an outcast. To add insult to injury, since birth I have had a cyst on my left eyebrow (thankfully it isn't that noticeable, infact I somehow never got bullied for it, though it makes my left eye look downturned).

In recent years, I have been seeing a mayor uptick in my growth of body hair — I am not diagnosed with any hormonal imbalance yet, but I have bloodwork scheduled.

Now, after this giant yap-a-tron, which I'm just going to say as TL;DR: I had good female role models as a child but I've always been a major outcast, I'm going to actually talk about what I'm here for.

For ages I've been obsessed with gay men. Specifically masculine gay couples, I would label myself as a fujoshi if it weren't for the fact that I get my fix from anything but the usual fujoshi media (manga anime etc).

I used to identify as a lesbian (now I don't anymore, and I only feel like the label aromantic can apply to me. I know for sure I like mostly only men now but being straight dosen't describe me, nor does bisexuality or similiar orenientations), but despite that I've always felt almost an envy for gay men, have always related more to characters that were men.

The more I age the more this aligment with the male gender grows, which I feel is weird since usually most trans people already have "signs" before puberty, while I've only started to after. Though I did use to have a tendency to secretly use random things in an almost packer-like fashion, and I gained arousal from that and thinking of having a bulge.

The weird thing is this: I don't feel any body dysphoria at all, maybe sometimes like my breasts are a bit in the way but nothing much. Infact, I sometimes IRL lament that "I look too much like a boy", even when I actually feel neutral or even somewhat positive about the thing I'm complaining about (for example, chin hair or having relativly small boobs compared to most cis girls my weight).

Most of my feelings come from, and I am quite embarassed to say this, arousal. Like the semi-packer and fujoshi thing I mentioned earlier, or that yesterday a classmate in my class accidentally got mixed up and reffered to me with a male name and I got turned on, or that even just thinking about going through the hormonal changes of Testosterone turns me on. This is barely the tip of the iceberg, but I do not want to make anybody uncomfortable or break any rules. I know that it's a whole bunch of bullshit, but I personally feel like the label "autoandrophile" describes me.

When I think of having to live as a woman in the future, I don't feel pure discontent but I am not okay with it either. Weirdly enough, I am fine with having had a past (and, for now, a present) as being a girl now, but if I could magically turn male on my like 20th birthday I would. If I think of a future where I never even tried getting transition or dwelled on these thoughts I believe I could be happy, but I'd feel like a part of me was missing.

But I am scared of transition, I don't want to put myself at risk in society, I don't want to ruin ties with my parents (I have no clue how they feel about trans people, it's always very flip-floppy/gray area with them, but for the rest they seem to be overrall chill with people who are queer in sexuality), and I feel like it would overrall just be awkward. If I think about the changes that I know that T brings, I am very happy, but also I would honestly rather fuck myself with a chainsaw that ever have to talk to a therapist or a doctor or something. Again, I try to win the DGAF war but I always end up caring too much about what others think.

The main copiums that I find telling myself are stuff like "It's just internalized misogny" or "it's just a fetish" or "most transmascs online are annoying and I don't wanna be like them" or "I'm placeboing myself/It's intrusive thoughts" or "Maybe I feel like I failed as a woman because I'm ugly" and other stupid shit like that. Though maybe something could be true about them? Maybe I am just a weird kinkster who hates the patriarchy???

This is so embarassing to post and you're free to take this down for whatever reason. This was quite a ramble so if you've made it through you deserve some sort of prize.

Im a 25 yr old trans femme person and started HRT a month ago and have slowly been changing the way I dress etc but I need advice on how to start looking like the woman I am inside. I have shoulder length curly hair and have done laser hair removal and shave but I still feel as though I can do more to look like a woman I’m just not sure what exactly to do so I wanted to reach out and see if anyone has advice on what helped in the early stages of your transition. Maybe I am being ambitious and it takes time but what changes can I make while the HRT does its work in the background?

Also what helped you be confident in displaying your true self early on? It is something I struggle with due to fearing for my safety and not fully being out yet even though I live in a big city. Are there any changes I can make early on before being fully out to help affirm my identity?

I appreciate and am grateful for any advice I can get 🙏🩷

​

Have you ever run away from accepting that you are trans by loving others? Loving is a bit generous... Let's say obsessing over others?

(For context I'm closeted ftm)

I had my first crush at the ripe age of 18. He's really nice and kind and sweet. He was my friend. At first it was sweet. Getting nervous around him, daydreaming about him, feeling butterflies.

I thought about him all the time. I started getting addicted to that feeling. The feeling of not thinking about me, or the future, or the fact I didn't see one for myself. All I needed was a goal. An unobtainable prize. Then my mind was quiet. It felt nice for a while. Not feeling sad when I didn't look how I wanted, because he liked girls. I thought he could like me if I looked like one.

It made me think I could be "normal" if I was with him. I could forget about the aching feeling of sadness when I look in the mirror. I thought if he liked the way I was now, that would be enough. I realise that my crush had little to do with him and a whole lot more to do with some internalized hatred.

I think I've experienced this multiple times at this point with platonic relationships as well...

Is this a common experience for trans people?

I am not young but am still trying to find my truth as I am exploring my own identity. Please forgive me if I have phrased anything incorrectly.

As the title states I'm changing my legal first and last name and decided that I can't missteps opportunity to get a weird and/or funny middle name.

So anyway I'd like it to start with a J(persona lreasons lol), give me a chuckle, and be able to be approved by the courts lol

Hi everyone! ❤️ I'm a trans girl from Latvia, hoping to move to Barcelona for university in 2028.

I'd like to start HRT in Spain and would love to hear from anyone who's navigated gender-affirming healthcare there, especially through Catalonia's Trànsit service.

How does access work for EU citizens studying in Spain? What should I prepare beforehand, and are there any tips for finding trans-friendly psychological support?

Any personal experiences or advice would mean a lot.

Thank you! 🫶

TW: ASSAULT and 18+ THEMES

i, 22F (cis..?) have severe trauma due to daily physical abuse and humiliation rituals/verbal abuse. I had my 1st unconsensual sexual experience at 8, and many other since ... It left me with a personality disorder. I am also autistic & adhd diagnosed.

I identified as male in middle school. I really liked it. I went by jayden and cut my hair short, and found myself even having a GF or two. I eventually came out to my family. They ignored it and kept referring to me as she/deadname, so I turned to people online for my experiences.

I also catfished as a boy online for 8 years since i was 8-9, and dated girls online.

I felt very validated. Then I got hit with TERF propaganda. I ended up convincing myself that I dont "hate being a girl", and the discomfort from my body was simply due to a harsh puberty and sexual trauma. I still feel this way, in a sense.

I chalked up me catfishing as a guy to date girls, as a religious trauma response. (when i found out my cartoon crush had a female voice actor i cried cuz i thought i was going to hell. very homophobic)
Maybe it was a loophole in my mind to erase guilt.

I then socially detransitioned, and since , have comfortably went by my assigned gender at birth and birth name. I havent thought much about it since.. until...

Flash forward. Im 22. I have been dating a beautiful woman for 6/months who is MTF. She consistently jokes about me being an egg.. She told me herself she thinks im trans 100%.

the things I say and do subconsciously I GUESS. I currently love being a girl, I love my body, i think its cute. But i wish there was a button I could press to just be a guy for a day. There are days I love my breasts, or hate them. Usually, I just want them bigger. Im a very skinny girl. I get insecure abt my smaller chest, thighs and butt.

It makes me feel lesser of a woman. I want surgeries so bad to enhance those features, not take them away. but what if im still not happy? what if these feelings are because ill never feel woman enough because im still.. jayden..? i dont know. ppl say cis folk dont question it this much. Maybe its because, if I were anything, its be "genderfluid" or NB, but I dont even know for sure those are real.. (please enlighten me if they are!! i am very open to be more knowledgeable.)

Sometimes I think about how it would feel to.. do intimate things with a woman, but with a cock. I have straps. I love pegging. But i want to feel it. I even found myself googling trans gear for more
pleasurable strap-sessions. I had dreams about entering my gf and busting (i swear this isnt a horny post im just trying to give as much info as I can to help w perspective.)

ugh the more I type the more obvious it feels. But i still want to be me. I like myself, I think. But i also hate myself. How do you know if you dont experience gender dysphoria? I saw an article about indirect dysphoria. All it did was describe my autistic and personality order symptoms... I left more confused. Am I trans or just a masucline woman? why do i want to rip my boobs off sometimes to have flatter appearances on more masculine outfits?

What if im just a tomboy? please help:( It sucks being so confused all the time.
I dont want to give up my genitals. I like them. 95% of the time.

Hi I'm 15 years old (m) and I have been struggling with hating my body for a very long time now and I also was struggling with a masturbation addiction a while ago because I was introduced to pornography at a young age so I've grown to hate my genitalia as well and I keep imagining this girl in my head she has her life together she is loved by her friends and every time I think of her I start to feel envious of her "why couldn't I be her " I didn't feel like her i didn't feel like anything sometimes I even cry thinking about her and when I recently learned what transgender means I thought that was what I was going through but the more I searched the more I Saw didn't match what I was feeling so please I need some help here what is wrong with me

I’m trans mtf and I don’t want to voice train because I really like my voice the way it is. It doesn’t pass but it doesn’t bother me. I’m also a vocalist and I don’t want to change it in any way.
TLDR; is it a valid decision to not train your voice?

Hello! I have been on injections for a while now and I’m sure this hasn’t been the first time, but I forgot to push the little bit of air out of the new needle after drawing the estradiol into the syringe. I have given myself undue anxiety about this somehow causing problems even though everywhere I’ve looked says this minuscule amount of air injected in my stomach fat is not going to cause a problem at all. To help ease my mind, can anyone give me additional confirmation? I need to be up early for work and stressing myself out right now is not going to help me get to sleep, haha! I know other people in this subreddit have asked before too, but someone telling me directly would definitely ease my mind. Thank you in advance!