In the past two years I did a bit of contemplating, thought exercising, reading people's testimonies (those filled with joy, and those filled with regret) on becoming and being a parent.

I won't choose a path of parenthood for myself for a plethora of reasons, that are not necessarily related to the state of our world now. But when I realised that even living in a utopia (or maybe just a stable environment for starters) wouldn't do it for me, I felt a relief, that I am spared from an ethical conundrum of bringing another human being into this place.

I recently shared these thoughts with my close ones, with the oldest relative being over 90 years old and they all in unison agreed that, even taking it into perspective of them going through WW2, surviving comunism, poverty and all those small and big crisises along the way, the darkest moment so far is now. And no uplifting news really to counterpart the bad that is happening. And that it might be too dark to bring a new person into this world. If I hypothetically could have chosen when I was born, I definitely wouldn't choose today.

I guess my questions are directed to those that already hopped off the fence and have children, although everyone is welcome to share their thoughts. I am especially curious for stories from parents that decided to have kids a couple years ago in hope the state of our world (locally and, or globally) gets better (since it did not got better, on the contrary):

- do you worry that your kids won't have a chance to experience at least as good adulthood as your is now?

- what do you feel when you think about your kids lifes 10, 20 or 50 years from now?

- do you think it will get better? If so, why do you think so?

I don't mean to sound inconsiderate or a doomer, I am simply curious. And if somebody feels there is a better subreddit to post such questions, please let me know!

I was 23 when I realized having children was choice and probably not for me. I’m now 36 and my husbands 43. I told my husband early I didn’t want kids and we’ve lived our lives the past 10 years as if we weren’t having them.

One of my parents died this past winter and I’m now baby crazy. I went through this when they first became sick but it was much easier to brush off. Now, we’re both seriously considering a child

I still don't think I would love parenting a kid (I have a of childcare experience). But I adore babies, get along well with teens and I think would adore being a parent to an adult. I’m also hoping going into this being like it’s not going to be my fave, will set me up for being presently surprise.

Anyone who went from an absolute no to now being a parent, I would love to know… has it been worth it?

Why have a kid? I’ve always known I wanted a life partner; someone who understands you, loves you, experiences life with you. I’ve always known I wanted a pet; there’s few things cooler (to me) than spending some of life with an individual of a different species. Why have a kid? What does that do that is meaningful and worth doing? For background: I was nine when I got a younger sibling and immediately stepped in to look after her. Found it frustrating and annoying and couldn’t wait to leave the family home. I’m now spending a bunch of time with my friends’ kids and while it is a hoot and super fun to get to know these tiny humans, the thought of being responsible for one just fills me with dread and stress. What am I missing? I’m also autistic so spelling this out for me will actually help massively. What’s the point? Im asking these questions because we live in a place where having kids seem amazing (for the kid) and I am clueless as to my own emotions about this.

Not really sure what I'm looking for, maybe advice or just if you have been in this situation how it ended up for you. Me and my husband got married young and quick. Dated for about a year and then married at 20. When the conversation of kids was first brought up we were both on the same page of either way we would be happy. After about a year of being married I would bring it up every so often and he would always say maybe. We decided we wouldn't put any pressure on it and just have that conversation when we were 25. It's been on my mind a lot recently and I ended up bringing it up a year earlier than we had planned. He is now a definite no and im leaning much more towards yes. I'm not sure what this means for us and how to move forward for now.