Ik that’s normal for most people but I’ve been stuck inside for MONTHS I’m scared of people lol, BUT TODAY I DID IT !! all I did was walk around the street but still I DID IT!

hi everyone, I wanted to share this story from today to hopefully inspire other people battling this condition.

my agoraphobia relapse was triggered by a huge panic attack when I went to the theatre last Christmas. that event singlehandedly caused my brain to completely short circuit, and I have spent most of this year trying to recover to some sense of normality. I was almost housebound when my anxiety was at its worst. trust me, it's been hell.

well, reader, today I went back to a theatre for the first time since that panic attack!

a few months ago I found out about a play that one of my favourite actors is starring in, and I knew I would be so disappointed if I let this disorder get the best of me, and scare me away from seeing the show myself. I also found out there was a relaxed performance being put on, which is specifically designed for people with additional needs (e.g. you're allowed to freely come and go from your seat), and I realised that was my opportunity - so I bit the bullet and bought my tickets. thankfully I was able to get end of row seats as well, so if I did feel the need to leave at any point, I would have been able to do so pretty easily.

not going to lie, this last week the rumination has been CRAZY, and I had a big cry before leaving the house this morning because I was so scared that what happened last year might repeat itself and undo all my progress. however, I'm pleased to say that it didn't! I was able to sit through the entire show without needing to step outside at all! my heart was racing for most of the first act, and towards the end of the show I felt a bit antsy, but I was able to sit with that discomfort and persevere!

I had the biggest sigh of relief/satisfaction in months when I finally exited the theatre afterwards. I really cannot underestimate how much of an accomplishment this feels for me.

to anyone reading this, I want you to know that recovery *is* possible. I still have a ways to go, but if you told me even 6 months ago I would ever feel able to sit in a theatre and watch a play again, or even do the train/bus journeys required to get there, I would have laughed in your face. if anyone wants advice on how I managed to get to this point in my recovery then I am more than happy to give advice (my DMs are open if you would prefer a private conversation).

sending love to you all!

Pushed myself to leave the house twice today. So proud of myself. Last week I couldnt even walk out the front door. Baby steps but we're getting there

Hey, i know people don't like to read long posts so i will try to keep it short with some of my facts

-Can't go outside alone, even taking out trash is hard, but can go with my gf even to the store, medium anxiety

-Can go to work with big anxiety but only with uber and talking someone on the phone ,no public transport or walking

-Work days are hard but manageable i feel panic attack coming but it doesn't come probably because of benzos

-Huge derealization 24/7

-On my off days if my gf is working i just stay in bed till like 5PM, then it gets a little bit better, mornings are the hardest

-Big fear that i will go insane and something is bad gonna happen when i'm outside

Could this be agoraphobia or is it just huge anxiety?

I haven’t been able to leave my house other than a few short car rides in a month since this

I know healing is not linear but I felt so much better last night because I went out loads yesterday and really felt more positive about healing. Today I tried to go out with my sister and started panicking immediately. I kept pushing through but got to a point t where I felt tingling all over my body and all I could think was how far away help is. How far is my home. How far are my parents. How far is the hospital. (Realistically 10 mins away max.) But I was driving and trying to drive and not panic whilst my mind is racing how far away any help is, is really hard. I ended up going home and now I feel shaken and negative again. Im due to go back to work on Monday which is not seeming very likely at this point in time. I know i should probably try to go out again but man its scary

Wondering whether this could open my world up a bit..

I was recovering from Agoraphobia..things were going well. But today my extended family asked my help for something and coz of that excitement or anxiety, I couldn't sleep at all. I didn't even sleep for 10 minutes last night. I was fully awake watching time go by..and I laid in my bed till 7 a.m

Now I am scared to leave my house and I am going to disappoint my family coz of this..I won't be turning up.

What do I do now. Should I gather courage and go anyway? Pr should I stay home and get some sleep.

https://gofund.me/03f380a0b

Can anyone who has healed please share tips on symptoms improving ? Things that have helped you the most?

Hello I'm currently hoping I can find some friends because I'm pretty lonely. I do have a husband, but he works alot.

I'm 24 and a woman. I enjoy gaming. I play peak, bg3, roblox, DBD, phas, and pretty much any game that looks fun. I'm not great at gaming though so don't expect a skilled teammate.

I'm also not officially diagnosed with agoraphobia, but that's because I'm too scared to find a doctor. My anxiety is extreme so I thought maybe joining this subreddit would help out.

I also got out of a really bad friendship towards the beginning of the year so I'm still hurting from that, but I'm healing and really just want to talk to new people.

If anyone is interested DM or let me know.

I don't have a doctor and been suffering from agoraphobia since 2018. I got a jury notice two days ago and I postponed it today and they said I have to go January 4th now. I haven't been to any health or mental doctor since I was a child I'm 33 now. I just signed up for teledoc and I'm going to talk to someone for the very first time. I'm gonna express my agoraphobia and toward the end will try to see if they can write a note to excuse me from jury duty. There is no way I can do that. I'd probably pass out and freak out. If this is not an option can someone help me on what I can do to get excused? I live in California and I have health net. I feel like I don't have much time and it's stressing me out.

Unfortunately I’ve dealt with anxiety for as long as I can remember but from the age of 11 it has caused me to be physically sick countless times (both in public and at home). This has made me more fearful of leaving the house to the point where I can go months without leaving unless it’s a medical appointment (the anxiety/ stress has caused stomach ulcers and other issues that worsen the sickness) and led to me quitting my job from the mental and physical toll.

The last time I was in hospital was about 2 months ago and it was an extremely traumatic time as the Manometry test caused me to gag and throw up after already being sick with fear all day to which I still haven’t recovered from. This next test is another endoscopy so I need a IV put in place which triggers my other fear of needles and that leads to vomiting and passing out. I feel like I’m stuck in an endless loop of being violently ill and no matter how often I try to explain it to medical professionals that it feels like I have permanent flu or food poisoning, they look at me like I’m exaggerating until I genuinely vomit, I’m not sure if I can go through with tomorrow because I don’t think I can even get past the car park of the hospital. The humiliation of being sick and terrified makes me want to crawl into a hole and never leave. If I miss this though I might be taken off the list for help and I’m back to square one and a hell of a lot sicker than I was to begin with, I genuinely already don’t want to leave the house but this is just the most afraid and trapped I’ve ever felt. Not sure what else to do so if there’s any recommendations regarding hospitals or emetophobia please let me know, I’m so tired of the suffering.

Sorry for the rant but thank you if you’ve read it x

Like genuinely I dont even know where to start so this might be messy, sorry in advance lmao

I have a hard time looking people in their eyes when having a conversation

Sometimes severe anxiety in public places

I dont go outside because it feels dangerous and it feels like I might die even though I know I most likely wont.

I can only find the bad things in good things

I get sad when I see someone happy, not because theyre happy but because it will be over soon for them. Especially with disabled people. I see a disabled person look incredibly happy and I will feel sad because "they dont know how bad they truly have it"

I can DESPITE someone like truly hate them hurt them in my mind over and over again, and the MOMENT they do or say the slightest nice thing to me. I feel bad for them instantly as if they are the best person alive at that moment. While there were very reasonable reasons to hate those people.

I feel bad to get in peoples way in ANY way shape or form. I could be very annoyed at something or someone and still be very passive to the situation just to not look like a horrible pissed of person.

I 90% prioritize others over myself.

When theres something I dont like to do, have an appointment somewhere I can literally count the days and its gonna be on my mind untill I have to go there and it feels like a timer.

Public transport is hell.

I feel looked at even though I KNOW I am not.

I feel like im in danger even though I KNOW I am not.

I always feel like the odd person out in any group.

When people offer me stuff I 90% of the time cant accept it purely because I feel bad and sad for them they want to give me something.

Most of these issues get less when I am not alone, so lets say im outside with my gf I feel better but not how it "should feel"

And the weirdest thing of this list is, sometimes I have days where NONE of these are even a thing.

Also might be good to mention that I have struggled with seborrheic dermatitis. Luckily not as bad as some people have it but still very painful and just not nice in general. And yes the pain gets worse when I am in public because public = stress = stress = pain (sebderm symptom)

Idk man I just dont feel normal right now and I just wanted to put this somewhere, maybe someone says something lifechanging you know... :)

I'm turning a new age this year, and I've been thinking a lot about how isolated I've become. I haven't had any reallife friends in four years... soon to be 5 if this year ends the same way. I've never had a girlfriend or experienced a romantic relationship. I stopped attending in-person school after 9th grade, and since then, my social life has become practically nonexistent.

I rarely go out unless there's a specific reason. When I do leave the house, it's usually to go to a park, and I tend to go early in the morning or at quieter times so there aren't many people around. I'm comfortable being there by myself, but I don't really go out alone to places like stores or other crowded public places.

My mom is one of the main reasons I leave the house, and I usually feel more comfortable going places with her or my older brother. I don't go to parties, social gatherings, or places where I'd have to interact with a lot of people.

I've never been to what people call a "party." I've never been to any school football games or extracurricular activity. I forgot what it feels like to have friends.

The strange thing is that I don't even know how much of this is anxiety, how much is avoidance, and how much has become a habit after spending so long isolated. I've gotten used to being alone, but I also feel like I've missed out on a lot of things people my age experience naturally, like friendships, relationships, and simply having a normal social life.

I've developed a lot of hatred and a lack of empathy. I'm apathetic. I'm so deep into isolation that all I can imagine is dying alone. I can't imagine ever having a girlfriend, yet alone going out with friends. I can't imagine myself being married or ever being important to someone outside of my family.

Anyone have this condition then when you actually go out, being around people is like shocking and overwhelming?

As per the title, I was waiting at a bus stop last week. I noticed I was feeling a bit lightheaded, which ended up me shaking/become overwhelmingly panicked, and when I boarded the bus, I felt that drop-in-blood-pressure feeling as though I was going to faint. I did not faint, but I felt shaky and awful the rest of the bus journey.

At work that day, I found I could not get food from the shop for lunch and a colleague had to buy food for me instead. I got some 'mental block' that I just couldn't enter the shop as I feared I would panic/faint in there.

The next day I felt so sick and nervous and shaky walking to the bus stop for work, but I managed it. I also managed to enter the shop with no issues. But on Saturday, I was in the town, feeling fine, and then I suddenly felt woozy and panicky again and then ended up crying/having a terrible anxiety attack. I went and sat in a nearby cafe as my legs had turned to jelly and I felt I couldn't walk as I felt I would collapse.

Tonight, I tried to get a bus into town as I needed to buy food as I am almost out. I got the bus and felt panicked/light headed on the journey. I exited the bus, and as I was walking towards the shop the most awful dizziness/panic came over me. My arms were tingling, I was hyperventilating, my legs felt like they couldn't move properly, I had this horrible feeling that I just wanted to curl up on the pavement. I could not enter the shop as the feeling was too powerful, so I had to return to the bus stop and go home.

It seems to stem from a fear of having a panic attack/fainting in public, and people thinking I am having some sort of severe mental episode and police being called on me, being recorded, etc. But it's almost like, if I 'think' about being dizzy, I become dizzy now?

I don't get why this has come on so rapidly. I have read several posts online and on here that indicate this could be agoraphobia and just the start of it and it could potentially get worse from here. I am due to perform in a play in our local theatre in two weeks time. I cannot have this happening as I cannot drop out of the play at such last minute as we do not have anyone to replace me. This is so awful.

Please could someone help?

Hi, sorry if anyone can relate to this situation because it’s awful, but am wondering how other people have managed to rebuild their lives?

I ended up having a breakdown after the way I was treated at work, and then sacked for my sickness absence. I’m really struggling to get back on my feet, I’ve got no money but a mortgage to pay, no friends or family around and am struggling to come to terms with the loss of my career that, after this experience, I will never return to. The whole situation makes me so sad, and so angry.

My mental health has been so badly affected, I have no idea how to start again. My confidence is gone, I have panic attacks when I leave the house (which is not very often), I rarely see or speak to anyone, and I have no idea how I’m supposed to find another job in this state.

If anyone has any encouragement or things that have helped them get back on their feet and be able to face going outside again, I’d be really grateful

Does snyone have any tips or tricks?

Some friends of mine hang out at a sex sauna every tuesday evening, not just for the sex (all of them are queer sexpo libertines though) but for the bubbles and chatter. For a month, every tuesday night I've tried to muster the courage to get out of my house and join them and when I FINALLY made it, bruh, what do we learn? My trans women homies couldn't get in with the ''woman fee'' because some TERFS had threatened to sue the sauna.

Of course we all left because of course we're all pissed.

Un. Fucking. Believebable. I'm a trans man and I knew TERFS would do their best to ruin my life but my exposures? Fuck them. I hate them all from the bottom of my dark trans agoraphobe heart.

Im a (25 f) with severe anxiety. Ive had my share of childhood trauma, dad d!ed at 5, a severely traumatized mom who in turn traumatized me etc etc. Ive always been very depressed, i have a bad victim complex (working on it), been in therapy since a child. Been on meds since childhood.

In my teens i experimented with alot of dru&s, particularly booger sugar.

Been sober for at least 10 years now but it definitely did alot of damage to me mentally.

In 2021 i developed agoraphobia. It was completely debilitating. I couldnt leave my room for the first few weeks. I was to scared to take a shower, eat, even breathe. I was scared that if i breathed i would hyperventilate and pass out.

So i would hold my breath until i was almost blue without even realizing it. My mom literally did everything for me during this time.

Fast forward and ive been through alot of exposure therapy, coping mechanisms and was able to return to a fairly normal life with just crippling anxiety.

Ive had ups and downs since then with bursts of panic attacks and thankfully i have a lovely partner who helps me through these times.

Id also like to mention i do have chronic pain issues which im sure is fueled by my heightened anxiety at all times. That has caused some pretty intense health anxiety at times and its a cycle.

im on the highest dose of all my meds and they do work but a few months ago i had a pap smear and passed out and found out i have high risk hpv (common) but i need to go back and get this test where they take a chunk of ur cervix out and test for cancer cells. High risk hpv is what causes cervical cancer. I could have gotten it as a kid or through sex but idk i literally cant go back.

im just terrified of passing out or dying or someone close to me dying. Theres so many things that im scared to say out loud bc im scared i will make that happen. I know everyone says im so strong but tbh i just feel so so weak and like i cant face anything. My confidence is just super low.

None of the coping mechanisms i know or get really truly work. I feel completely out of touch. I feel weak and selfishly i feel like nobody else goes through this but me. I feel like i have it worse then everyone else. ( again with the victim complex) i just feel alone, and like nobody truly understands me. Or that i can face this. Im completely controlled by my fears. And i really dont know at this point if i can get better. It hurts to say that.

Fear completely controls me, if i have any slight pain in my body i start having a panic attack. Like cant move feel like im gonna pass out have to lay down nobody cant talk to me i need ice on my chest and head and a fan on me with bluey or hey bear sensory videos on and i just have to suffer for hours until im to tired and fall asleep its god awful. I can barely drive to walmart or fucking go to work.

I have an intense amount of guilt i carry for not being able to work, or be normal. Its so much on my partner to carry me, and im scared he will get tired of it and i will truly then have nothing. He is a saint and would do anything for me but i know it gets hard for him.

I dont know what to do to get better. I take my meds, go to therapy, eat well, drink water. Stay afloat. But i feel like im drifting further and further away from myself. I dont even know who i am anymore or what i want.

If youve gotten this far.. thanks for listening.

I am going to be stuck at home the next couple of days, and often I’m home over the weekends. I find myself getting bored easily.