You do not have to do something (like getting married by xx age. or at all) or stop doing someting (like a hobby, ie gaming, etc) because of societal pressure.
The trouble is when you have an overwhelming urge to "make the right choice" at all times and don't know what that choice is, and don't know what you really do "have to do" and what you don't, then you get stuck in indecision and shame over every single thing.
Cue a wasted 20's.
I felt and feel shame over everything. Lack of achievements, lack of personality, lack of relationships (both friends and romantic, never dated), ugly, shame over doing things, shame over not doing those same things... And none of it came from others in my life (almost). It's all self-reinforced and at the same time feels insurmountable.
Agreed! I’ve learned how to be comfortable being by myself most of the time. It’s really nice to just be able to be alone and not have someone constantly checking on you all the time.
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u/a_model_citizen_ 13h ago
You do not have to do something (like getting married by xx age. or at all) or stop doing someting (like a hobby, ie gaming, etc) because of societal pressure.