Well said, I wasn't a bad guy or anything. I had a hard childhood. I dealt with a lot of physical and emotional neglect. I also have a physical disability from birth. Many adults in my life told me that one day I would get a girlfriend and people would be jealous of how my life would be. It set up this mythos that my worth would be dictated by the women I attract. I ruined some of the most meaningful relationships in my life and it's by being so concerned that I would lose them and become worthless.
The really destructive part about this frame of thinking is that it objectifies women into not fully human and their purpose being centered around my need. Women are not on this planet to make men feel secure.
Preach brother! This is one of the best replies I have seen here. I was one who used women as a crutch, and have only realised this recently. “To all the girls I’ve loved before….” I’m sorry. 😔
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u/hemanstarfox 11h ago
Well said, I wasn't a bad guy or anything. I had a hard childhood. I dealt with a lot of physical and emotional neglect. I also have a physical disability from birth. Many adults in my life told me that one day I would get a girlfriend and people would be jealous of how my life would be. It set up this mythos that my worth would be dictated by the women I attract. I ruined some of the most meaningful relationships in my life and it's by being so concerned that I would lose them and become worthless.
The really destructive part about this frame of thinking is that it objectifies women into not fully human and their purpose being centered around my need. Women are not on this planet to make men feel secure.