r/Adulting • u/murano0 • 13h ago

so guys ?

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238

u/WhenIntegralsAttack2 12h ago

Staying with a girlfriend who was unsure about me. If someone is unsure about you, leave them and find someone who is all-in for you.

Also, for fuck’s sake men we should not just date the most attractive women who will have us. There are many other more important qualities in a partner.

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u/PwrCpl4Fun123 10h ago

100% and enthusiasm goes a long long way. That person who wants you, wants to be with you, they will make life so much more enjoyable than someone who barely tolerates you.

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u/FactoryRejected 4h ago

Bruh, that hits home and not in a good way.

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u/StoicSinicCynic 6h ago

As corny as it may sound, it takes a level of maturity to know that the "highest value" partner is one who has their shit together and who loves you sincerely.

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u/Ok3oomer 11h ago

You still have to like her, or you're just the same type of person as your ex

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u/WhenIntegralsAttack2 10h ago

Yes of course?

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u/The-skaterphysicist 10h ago

Great stuff bro 👏🏻

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u/MrZubar 8h ago

Do women go all-in for men?

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u/JoffoCake3 8h ago

Women reading your thread gents. Pretty good stuff and yes. I have been all in on my partner for 15years. Met him at university when he wanted help painting a space marine mural in the geek club. He had the worst beard, face fungus stuff. But he could really carry a conversation and everyone makes terrible style choices in thier early 20's.

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u/MrZubar 7h ago

That's good. For my whole life it's felt like a pursuit to convince and please. Except with my girlfriend who I'm about to marry now. She actually put in effort. The only thing I wonder about sometimes is if I just love her more than she loves me.

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u/cyb3rsky 7h ago

Congrats man❤️. I don't have much to say but to say that don't overthink man. Maybe the important is that you both love each other and that is enough

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u/Standard_Snow07 7h ago

Yea sometimes! Same as men. I feel like a lot of girls value emotional aspects of a relationship especially tho (coming from a girl)

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u/Virtual_Ad9989 3h ago

I would add if you’re six months in and still unsure just break it off. Don’t waste any more of both your time.

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u/ThePepperPopper 3h ago

But also, don't the hottest good woman you can, I'd say.

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u/HouseTelVinny 54m ago

And, the biggest way to find out if he or she is the right one is through open and honest communication.

I learned a lot from being a terrible boyfriend in a terrible relationship (we were awful for each other). But, they biggest one was to be open and honest about everything. The right partner will appreciate that and reciprocate it.

My wife and I have been together 8 years now and have never had a fight because, when we feel ourselves getting upset, we take a few minutes to wait until we are in the right mind space to communicate and we then we do just that.

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u/Stewart_Games 47m ago

Was going to say something like "Sometimes leaving her means winning your peace".