r/whatdoIdo • u/Top_Run_1107 • 10h ago
Update: my boyfriend doesn't respect my boundaries.
We're now broken up. I found out he had been cheating on me with one of my friends literally a day after I made my first post. I was really close to breaking up with him anyways, I'm only 16 and that's way too young to be trying to change a shitty boyfriend, but that just sealed the deal. I hate that I still love and miss him but I know he probably doesn't feel the same way about me. I'm the most upset that he chose my friend to cheat on me with and that she went along with it. I'm working on finding better people to surround myself with.
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u/bert-has-a-towel 10h ago
Very mature outlook. I applaud you
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u/Careless-Library-731 6h ago
Yea especially at 16 youre more mature than most adults I know. I hope you know that was not on you at all. It was on them. They're the ones who decided to do that and it's nothing at all because of you
I hope you work on just finding your own happiness and youre still young, good people will come by along the way <3
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u/SubtleSnarkster 10h ago
I’m proud of you ♥️
Just know that with this level of reflection skills and your maturity, you’re already far ahead. Wishing you the best!
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u/Caseythealien 7h ago
That's smart there is zero wrong with you he is shitty so is your former friend. Some times people like that just gravitate towards each other you got rid two crappy people at once freeing up. Space for cute boys and friends with boundaries.
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u/LittleBabySammy 3h ago
dude yer 16 and wAYYY more mature than I was at yer age, youre doing amazing, fuck that guy
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u/One-Method-4373 10h ago
I know it sucks but this is a life lesson and good for you for having enough self esteem to know that you don’t deserve this from either of them!
And it’s not about how young you are you should never try to change a shitty man, just move on; a very good lesson to learn early in life.
Try to remember that what you love/miss is not the real him it’s the lie of himself that he told you that you are mourning. Now you know he’s actually a total loser.
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u/justinf538 2h ago
you shouldn't be trying to change anyone i think you are to young and need to grow up some the thing i dont understand about people is why be with that person if you feel the need to change them we are who we are when you start doing this is when people resent you i just hope one day you realise that will destroy any relationship you are getting into
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u/IllustratorWarm6009 2h ago
Good for you, take a break and time for yourself. See why this has happened, make sure you choose people whose past is genuinely acceptable.
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u/NikkiEchoist 2h ago
I remember when I was 16 I met this guy 21. We had a 2 year relationship. He had to move away in the end. I never loved anyone as much ever again. If I had known I would have gone with him. Anyway my point is you can fall pretty hard for people at your age. My mum used to say to me when I was heart broken that someday you won’t remember his name. It’s not quite true I remember all my boyfriend’s names but I did forget the heart ache and the pain. Love at your age is kinda easier because you rarely live together or have the responsibilities of those older than you. You’ll have many more true friends and better boyfriends. Take care.
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u/Illustrious-Chest599 10h ago
You’re on the right path. Both those people are shitty and you don’t need them on your life.