r/colonoscopy • • May 04 '22

PSA: Finish your prep and follow your doc's prescription/orders

437 Upvotes

Many people here ask if you can stop the prep early, or only take the first dose. Please just follow the instructions. Your bowel continually creates waste. When you are clear 12 hours before, doesn't mean you'll be clear the next morning. Finish your prep, and if you can't call your clinic and tell them you can't.

Also, don't switch preps without consulting your doctor. Certain preps are used for specific reasons.


r/colonoscopy • • Feb 02 '26

Primer Regarding Colonoscopies + AMA

53 Upvotes

Hello, I've been posting here for a few years. Just figured I would write this up to address common questions about colonoscopies. Feel free to ask me stuff in the comments although I will avoid directly giving any medical advice and may choose to not answer specific questions about diagnosis, treatment, etc. This should be addressed with your provider.

Procedures/Terminology

Colonoscopy: the procedure we all get. Scope gets inserted from the rectum and is navigated to the cecum (beginning of your colon). It is then withdrawn, allowing you to look for polyps, ulcers, inflammation, etc and remove polyps, take biopsies, etc. Sometimes the terminal ileum is evaluated as well, although this is not a standard part of a colonoscopy.

  • usually lasts for anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour, depending on how complicated it might be. Something to note is that the procedure really should NOT be shorter than 8 minutes. A quality metric that has become more common in the last few years is that the time it takes to "withdraw" from the cecum is around 8 minutes, so at minimum a colonoscopy should take 9 minutes at the shortest, which would be somewhat fast in my opinion (since it assumes that the endoscopic made it to your cecum in one minute, which is pretty quick) This number used to be 6 minutes so it is possible that older doctors haven't adapted.

Biopsy: a small sample (usually the size of a pen tip) is removed for microscopic evaluation. Biospies are performed to check for infection, inflammation, etc. They are not used to check for cancer outside of very specific scenarios like having a long history of inflammatory bowel disease where the colon has been scarred and inflammed for years. If you are just getting a colonoscopy for screening or because of symptoms like bleeding or diarrhea, a biopsy is not taken because they are concerned for cancer. Cancer in the colon will always be present in a polyp/mass, not something microscopic (outside of the IBD scenario).

Polypectomy: the removal of polyps. This is typically done with either forceps (used for small 1-3mm polyps), cold snare (a small metal lasso that cuts off polyps usually less than 15mm in size), or a hot snare (metal lasso that can be heated for extra cutting power, usually used for polyps that are large or have a blood vessel that would need to be cauterized first).

  • The risk of bleeding or perforation with a cold snare is extremely low. There is a slightly higher risk of complications with hot snare and more common on the right side of the colon where the walls are thinner.
  • Polypectomy does not cause pain unless you develop a therapy injury from the cautery.

Endoscopic mucosal resection (EMR): refers to a more complex polyp removal which require some extra tools and time. Polyps needing EMR are typically large >20mm and may need to be removed in multiple pieces. This sometimes means that you will need to schedule the procedure in the hospital (instead of an outpatient surgery center) or come back on a different day where you have more time for the procedure.

Endoscopic submucosal dissection (ESD): a more complicated version of EMR, for very large polyps. This is a special procedure that requires additional training, most GI providers cannot do this.

Colectomy: surgical removal of part of the colon. This is almost never done anymore as most polyps can be removed endoscopically, however may be needed for extremely large polyps and for cancer (or if you aren't somewhere with an endoscopist trained in EMR/ESD)

Endoscopic clips: these are used to prevent bleeding or to close the site of a polyp resection. This is common for large polyps. The clips are made of metal that will not affect you if an MRI is needed. They will typically fall off by themselves and you probably won't notice them pass.

Adenoma detection rate (ADR): a quality metric you can ask about to confirm whether the person doing your colonoscopy is reliable. The goal should be a number of 25-30%. This is essentially a number of how often the endoscopist is finding relevant polyps. If the number is lower than this, it implies they are not thorough in their colonoscopy.

Pathology/Terminology

Hyperplastic: can be either a descriptive term or pathologic term; refers to benign polyps. These look visibly different from pre-cancerous polyps and are typically flat rather than raised.

Sessile: this is a description for the appearance of a polyp (which basically just means that it is round and raised, like a pimple).

Tubular adenoma: pathology term. standard pre-cancerous polyp.

Sessile serrated adenoma: pathology term. Different from the "sessile" description above. A sessile serrated adenoma (SSA) is considered to have slightly more pre-cancerous potential than a tubular adenoma.

Tubulovillous or villous adenoma: pathology term. higher risk pre-cancerous polyp, typically requires closer follow up than an SSA or tubular adenoma

Dysplasia: refers to the pre-cancerous potential of a polyp. By definition anything that is pre-cancerous is considered to have "low grade" dysplasia although this is not always mentioned (by convention). "high-grade dysplasia" means that the polyp is effectively on the cusp of becoming cancer.

Tortuous or Redundant colon: this is simply a description how difficult it is to navigate your colon with a scope. Tortuous means that it turns in certain areas instead of being straight. Redundant means that its somewhat loose and there are area where it stretches easily. These are not a diagnosis. Many people ask whether this is something to be concerned about. It is not. It's a purely endoscopic observation that is made to help for future colonoscopies. Chronic constipation, abdominal surgery or trauma, childbirth will often cause tortuous or redundant colons, but it is the outcome not the cause of symptoms. You are not constipated because of a redundant colon. You are constipated and therefore develop a redundant colon.

Notes: often times the procedure report will say that "sessile" polyps were removed. This is simply referring to their appearance, which is entirely separate from that actual histological diagnosis (which could be tubular adenoma, sessile serrated, hyperplastic, etc)

Types of sedation:

- Moderate sedation: typically you will get Fentanyl/Versed usually in escalating doses. The goal here if comfort, not knocking you out completely, so most people dose off and then at some point wake up. If you want more medication, just ask, usually the GI doc will give more unless they're almost done with the procedure (or cannot due to vital sign abnormalities). Some people don't do well with this so if you've had a bad experience just mention it to your provider.

- Monitored Anesthesia Care (MAC): most common type of sedation to receive in the US, uncommon in most other places in the world. Some people think you are "choosing" propofol with this. The most commonly used medication is propofol. However, you are choosing to have an anesthesia provider, who will decide the type of sedation you need. It is common to give additional medications like Versed and Fentanyl with propofol.

- General Anesthesia: complete sedation requiring intubation/ventilation. This is very uncommon, usually only done if there is a high concern for aspiration during the procedure or if movement of any kind cannot be tolerated for some reason.

- Gas: other countries like the UK make use of nitrous oxide gas. I have never used this so I cannot comment on what its like.

- Unsedated: this is uncommon in the US. Based on posts here it seems like people have trouble finding people to perform unsedated colonoscopies, but that hasn't really been my experience. I would say most cities have providers that can offer this, though you will have better luck going to academic centers where reimbursement for the procedure is not playing a factor in the type of sedation offered at the institution.

PREP/DIET

There are different forms of prep: Golytely, MoviPrep, SuPrep, Sutab, Clenpiq, etc. Some, like MoviPrep are lower volume so may be better tolerated than others. From an american perspective, insurance is the biggest barrier to prescribing stuff so your provider will be able to best address what prep works best for you.

Follow up intervals

This will vary probably based on what country you are in as populations and cancer risks are different. In the US, the follow up range can be anywhere from 7-10 years (for one or two small tubular adenomas), 5-10 years (for one of two sessile serrated adenomas) or 3-5 years if you have multiple polyps. usually most people will recommend the lower range of the interval (so 7 years rather than 10 years for a couple of small polyps). If you have a polyp removed in multiple pieces then it is standard to return in 6 months to make sure the polyp was removed entirely.

The US uses the ASGE Guidelines. These are updated every few years as more evidence comes out, so are likely to be adjusted again in the next few years.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Frequently asked questions

"Do I need to finish prep, my stool is clear!"

Yes please always finish your prep. I cannot tell you the number of times someone shows up claiming they didn't finish because things looked clear and then their entire right colon is covered with stool. Having clear stools doesn't mean anything, complete your prep please.

"Can I eat X, Y, and Z before my procedure".

All endoscopy centers have sheets they give to discuss low fiber or clear liquid diets. If they don't, just google it and find an article from Cleveland Clinic or Sloan Kettering or something. There is no magic answer. If your endoscopy center suggested one thing but people on Reddit are saying something else, just stick to whatever your center writes.

The truth is that this is all somewhat arbitrary and the instructions will almost always be overly restrictive to avoid issues because people are very bad at actually following through on diet changes. So, for instance, if they say that jello isn't ok, its probably because someone ate pudding and thought it was jello (not because jello itself is an issue).

"Is it a bad thing that I'm being asked for a follow up appointment"

No, this is commonly done just for a face to face discussion. Just because you have an appointment doesn't mean you're going to get bad news)

"Is this pain/cramping normal after a colonoscopy"

Probably yes. A lot of people post about experiencing pain at what they perceive is a polypectomy site, but this probably isn't the case. Your colon does not experience pain like your skin so 99% of the time, you can't feel a polyp being removed. More likely what you are feeling is the gas/CO2 used to expand your colon or some discomfort from the scope stretching your colon too much. Having some discomfort after a procedure is normal. Try to walk around and eat to stimulate your GI tract to restore its movement and push out excess air.

Having fevers, nausea/vomiting, significant amounts of blood, or pain to the point where you cannot move is not normal and you should call your clinic or go to the ER.

"How do I know who should perform my colonoscopy"

As above, one thing that you can ask about is ADR. This is a simple way to get a baseline understanding of if they are good enough. Beyond that, there isn't a great way to know beyond getting good feedback from other patients or providers. I would personally avoid going to a surgeon (vs a gastroenterologist) in the US, as the training is different and it is unlikely that a surgeon will ever have the same experience as a GI doctor. The only exception to this might in if you have established colon cancer or are needing some kind of colon surgery, in which can having the colo-rectal surgeon doing the surgery would be reasonable.

"What kind I eat after my procedure?"

For the most part whatever you what. The vast majority of people resume their lives normally after colonoscopies. Some people might have some residual GI issues from the prep affecting their colon, so you may want to take it easy and stick to lighter foods. Sometimes taking probiotics can help speed the recovery of your GI tract, but people have mixed results with this.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If anyone has questions about procedures/sedation/etc I am happy to answer and may edit the post above to reflect your questions (I think I can do this)


r/colonoscopy • • 9h ago

Personal Story My colonoscopy yesterday. The good, bad and awful

52 Upvotes

I have been so nervous to do my colonoscopy. My dad had colon cancer. I had my first one 8 years ago, repeat every 5 years. At the 5 year mark, I was on medication that lowered my immune system for awhile so I put it off. I tried about a year and a half ago bit wasn't cleared out. Fast forward, I finally scheduled it for yesterday. I have very small veins but was encouraged that the place had one of those ultrasounds to find veins. Unfortunately, being so extremely dehydrated from the prep, they were unable to get a vein after so many failed tries. They gave me a couple options. One would be to reschedule it an do it later in the day so I could super hydrate before the time when you have to stop drinking. Two was to do it without sedation. I am a woman in my mid 50s. I never imagined doing this without sedation but even more I could not imagine going through this whole ordeal again anytime soon so I chose to get it done. They gave me a large dose of lorazapram and I went ahead with it. It was not the worst thing I have ever experienced medically. I have chronic migraines and those are much worse. But there were moments I questioned a lot of things on my life. Lol. I got through it, they only found one small polyp. I know my dad (who has passed) was cheering for me.

Never in my life did I expect to do something like this. I kind of feel like a Rockstar. And so grateful it is done. Just done. Repeat in 5 years.

Believe me, if I can do what I just went through, anyone can deal with the prep and the procedure.


r/colonoscopy • • 2h ago

Before Scope Questions During a colonscopy, will my thighs be revealed?

2 Upvotes

I'm a minor and I have to get my first ever colonoscopy in about a week. I have semi-fresh cuts on my thighs and I'm super worried that they'll see them. My parents don't know about it (which I know isn't good). Will my thighs be revealed at all during this? I'm also an SA survivor and feel very uncomfortable with a lot of my body being shown in the first place, and having no insight on how much of me they'll be able to see.


r/colonoscopy • • 42m ago

Personal Story Blood stool every other day

• Upvotes

Seriously question, for the past months is it because too much caffeine I’m taken? I’m a gym rat, heavy lifting or too much caffeine or too much spicy foods? 25M 160 5’5


r/colonoscopy • • 12h ago

Personal Story Scared.. help..

8 Upvotes

Hi! I’m 32F and have been experiencing intermittent bright red rectal bleeding for around 2 weeks. It started with episodes of mild diarrhea, but my stools are now more formed. Sometimes the blood seems to coat one side of my stool and the toilet becomes tinted. I have no anal pain or stomach pain..

I went to the ER because one time after pooping there were still blood staining my undies even when I just fart. They found no external hemorrhoids. My stool test was positive for blood. I took Hemostan and venoright as prescribed, and the bleeding stopped for a couple of days but eventually returned 1 day.
I’ve consulted two gastroenterologists. One wasn’t sure it was hemorrhoids, while the other said internal hemorrhoids are still possible even without visible external ones or pain. I’m taking my prescribed medication and was advised to consider a colonoscopy but my doc reassured me she doesnt think cancer she even ordered CEA bloodtest a tumor marker blood test that came back negative.

I’m anxious about colon cancer and wondering if it could also be internal hemorrhoids or proctitis.
Has anyone experienced something similar? What was your diagnosis? Can internal hemo bleed a lot even without hard poop?


r/colonoscopy • • 6h ago

Before Scope Questions colonoscopy tomorrow

2 Upvotes

31yo female with blood on most bowel movements. Sometimes its such a tiny amount that I would never have noticed if I had not looked really closely. I am 18 months postpartum so I am hoping that this is due to hemorrhoids. Have any of you experienced bleeding like this? Really hoping I will be okay.


r/colonoscopy • • 6h ago

Other Estoy muy preocupada

2 Upvotes

Tengo ansiedad derivada de temas medicos. Tengo una hija de 3 años y no quiero morirme y dejarla sola en este mundo. Tengo positivo para sangre oculta en heces, me suena la tripa, me inflamo, tengo dolor en el recto. El viernes me hacen colonoscopia. Alguien que haya pasado por lo mismo con resultados no graves?


r/colonoscopy • • 7h ago

Needs Encouragement One bottle of prep down…here goes nothing

2 Upvotes

I haven’t had a bowel movement in 6 days. I’ve done the 4 days of the prep diet, 1 day of the liquid diet, 1 dose of the Suprep, and the corresponding 32oz of water. It has been an hour and nothing…I’m so nervous 😩


r/colonoscopy • • 3h ago

Needs Encouragement Long Fast Colonoscopy

1 Upvotes

Hi all. I’m a 21 year old F that just scheduled a colonoscopy due to some post infectious ibs symptoms, but doctors are erring on the side of caution since there’s a pretty significant family history of colon cancer and colon polyps.

That said. My sheet says no solid foods after 11 am on Nov 3rd and my actual procedure isn’t until 3pm on the 4th, with an arrival time of 2 pm. I am really anxious and scared, actually in tears writing this right now. If any of you have any tips, tricks or even any kind of reassurance on how to survive that long stretch on clear liquids alone it would be appreciated. Genuinely considering taking a max dose of hydroxyzine to see if it makes it so all I really can do is sleep (and violently shit apparently).


r/colonoscopy • • 10h ago

After Scope Questions Post Colonoscopy Bowel Movement

3 Upvotes

How long after your colonoscopy did it take to return to normal bowel movements? I had mine five days ago and I just had my first bowel moment this morning and another after lunch. Is this normal? No pain, blood or anything like that…just checking what others have experienced. Thank you in advance.


r/colonoscopy • • 16h ago

Tips & Advice Prep day!

6 Upvotes

Hey friends, today is prep day and I’m super nervous! I posted about a week ago asking for advice, and got lots of good pointers since I’m nervous about throwing up while taking my prep. I have zofran that I’m going to take about 30 minutes before I start my first round of prep!

My only problem is that I’ve woken up today hungry as all hell but I’m on my liquid diet now lmao. I’m going to run to the grocery this morning to get what I need. I just have a few questions!

I’ve read on some places that hard candies and gummy bears (both without red, blue, or purple dyes) are good. It sounds tempting, but I wanted to ask first. I’m mostly concerned about passing out from hunger, as I’ve had a habit of that in the past. 😭

Also some other remedies for getting the suprep down easier would be great to hear as well! Maybe a little pep talk sprinkled in.

Everyone has been very nice here, so thank you all for being super helpful!


r/colonoscopy • • 13h ago

Other Colonoscopy with active c diff

3 Upvotes

Anyone had a colonoscopy with active cdiff infection? (Toxins positive) please share your experience


r/colonoscopy • • 18h ago

Personal Story Positive Update (UK M32)

6 Upvotes

Hey folks apologies for the delayed update.

In the end after initially fearing it was not working I found that they Picolax they gave me went down much better and worked quite effectively. The Senna that was recommended by department staff seemed to help with the preparation process.

Had second colonoscopy appointment in the end a few days ago and I found it went ok (opted for air option and while process was rather painful it was less intense than I thought it might be).

Luckily it turned out there was nothing that the team could detect. One of the doctors thought that they would find haemmorrhoids if nothing else but apparently everything looked perfectly fine and that a successful preparation process had meant that everything was clear to view.

Want to say thanks again to all the folks on here who offered advice and kind thoughts throughout this process, have found it all pretty supportive. <3


r/colonoscopy • • 14h ago

Before Scope Questions What should I expect?

2 Upvotes

Hello everyone! I am a 22 year old who is getting his first endoscopy and colonoscopy this Friday. I am no stranger to stomach issues- nor am I to cleaning my bowel. I’ve done two miralax cleanses in the past for severe constipation. But I have NEVER done anything like this. I have severe health anxiety, so I’m INCREDIBLY anxious about the prep- not so much the procedure at all itself! The prep they have given me is:
- On Thursday, I will take two dulcolax tables and gas-X before my first round of prep. My prep I was given is Plenvu. My first dose is at 3pm.
- On Friday, at 7am is when I finish my prep, as well as taking gas-X again. My colonoscopy is at 11:30am.
So what should I expect? Will I be able to sleep the night before? Am I going to be toilet bound all day on Thursday? Should I prepare anything specific for this?
Thank you all in advance!


r/colonoscopy • • 17h ago

Tips & Advice Day of Miralax Tips

3 Upvotes

Hello everyone, I'm on the clear liquids and miralax day. Any tips on what you all do to pass the time when not pooping to get through the hunger pains? What are the best distractions? Thanks so much! 😁

Edit: when I say distractions i mean non drink distractions lol. I mean like activities.


r/colonoscopy • • 14h ago

Personal Story Internal hemorrhoid issues - post colonoscopy

1 Upvotes

no hemorrhoid issues before procedure, which turned out to be clean. Doctor mentioned I had internal Hemorrhoids at follow up call, and seemed surprised I had no issues. Fast forward almost a month post colonoscopy, I'm thinking more gut health needed, cause stools are solid, but I have this thing where I'm running to the bathroom feeling like I need to wipe in the afternoon or evening. Basically, whatever happened during that prep and post procedure unlocked issues. I'm really hoping this doesn't send me back, and this thing heals on it's own. if you've been through this let me know.

TLDR: internal unknown hemorrhoids causing problem post procedure, mucous leakage


r/colonoscopy • • 1d ago

Tips & Advice Help w/ prep options

6 Upvotes

Hello, I am having my colonoscopy next week and I have been prescribed the dreaded 4 liter peg 3350/electrolytes 236 gm. I am a little worried because everyone says they’ve had horrible experiences with it. My current symptoms are nausea and constipation, I will be meeting with a nurse tomorrow to go over everything but I’m wondering if there are any other options that people may have had better experiences with?

Alternatives that were written down for me were Moviprep, Suprep, and Clenpiq.


r/colonoscopy • • 1d ago

Before Scope Questions Help

3 Upvotes

Hey everyone. I was hoping someone can shed some light on what’s happening in my body as I’m freaking out over the spike in colon cancer in younger adults. I’m 35 M, for the past year I’ve felt a small “air bubble” feeling in my lower left abdomen (sigmoid area). Over this year it feels like the air bubble got a big bigger. I tend to feel it more when I’m seated or laying down. Not so much standing or during exercise. For the past couple months I’ve felt the bubble and recently (2-3 weeks) have had Bowles that vary from diarrhea to not small balls. Also, I’ve noticed a groove in my stool, almost as if someone took an ice cream scoop and carved a groove on the stool. No visible blood not un explained weight loss. Has anyone else had these similar symptoms before? If so can I please have some input? My next step is a to schedule a colonoscopy as that will determine for sure what’s happening, but I would like to hear if anyone has heard or dealt with something similar to my case. Thanks everyone 😊


r/colonoscopy • • 22h ago

Before Scope Questions I drank blue gatorade, should i no have?

1 Upvotes

Sorry I was here earlier too about something different but I wanted to know; have I messed up my colonoscopy? I just took a few sips of gatarade frost; glacier freeze. My prep only said no red or purple but I'm seeing online that blue is bad too? I hadn't had any the entire day & only just now, end of prep, took a few sips bc I feel a little headache-y & figured it was electrolyte imbalance.

I have to finish the prep in a few hours after some sleep so I'm hoping that will flush it out??? I'm hoping I'm fine though because blue wasn't listed. I'll be finishing the prep 3hrs before I check in so around 5am (pst).


r/colonoscopy • • 1d ago

Other They should give Suprep to terrorists.

29 Upvotes

That is all.


r/colonoscopy • • 1d ago

Before Scope Questions Water vs air colonoscopy unsedated

2 Upvotes

I know experiences differ for each patient. Looking for experiences from people who had both air and water immersion colonoscopies unsedated.

Six months ago I had a water immersion colonoscopy unsedated. Moving the scope in and out was mildly painful, overall manageable. Problem is that they had to remove one 2 cm polyp and that one doctor couldn’t do “under water”. She had to remove the water and pump air or CO2 in. That part with polyp removal was really painful. Based on my condition medical team offered to end the procedure and reschedule to a different date when they would do removal of polyp under sedation but I didn’t want to do the prep again and they managed to remove it. I had to grab rails, was crying, shaking. Overall really painful once they started pumping air (or CO2?) for polyp removal.

Six months later, I shouldn’t expect large polyp removal again. I still don’t have a driver and scheduled another unsedated procedure at a different facility assuming that now there should be no large polyp removal hence the “painful” part of the procedure will not apply.

Problem is that l recently learned that the new facility doesn’t use water or CO2. Only room air. They do unsedated but “in rare cases”. Doctor said they “did it before” but didn’t sound like it’s a common practice there.

How much worse can it be with air compared to water immersion? Again, moving the scope in and out wasn’t an issue during the previous procedure.


r/colonoscopy • • 23h ago

Other Curious

1 Upvotes

This has not happened to me. Although I flunked my Clenpiq prep because of vomiting and need to reschedule. Will be trying a pill prep next time and asking for nausea medication.

What happens if someone must have a colonoscopy but fails the preparation each and every time due to vomiting?


r/colonoscopy • • 1d ago

After Scope Questions Somewhat fine but bleeding a lot?

2 Upvotes

I had my colonoscopy & endoscopy on October 1st. Luckily no polyps, just loads of inflammation 😅 which I will be seeing my doctor about on the 31st

I feel like I’m more regular in my bowels movements again BUT I feel like I’m bleeding more. I’m using more wipes rather than dry toilet paper, and it doesn’t hurt to go like it used to when I expected the bleeding

Did anyone else experience this after their procedure?


r/colonoscopy • • 1d ago

Personal Story Was scared to death. Here's what I have to share. It is long but I hope you like it.

2 Upvotes

Figured I'd share. Pretty similar story to this gentleman. My post is going to be long. Hopefully it is interesting and helps someone.

https://www.reddit.com/r/colonoscopy/comments/1x966y0/was_so_very_scared/

My procedure was performed this morning at a rural Appalachian hospital.

Same-ish Weight + Weight Loss, Age, Sex, Bleeding pattern. I had fatigue and have bled off and on since I was 20, Various amounts from streaked wipe to "so bloody it is silky" toilet water. It was lower back pain that made me go "Oh crap." and schedule a proper spelunking though. I had mine this morning. Been bleeding a long time, one stretch was 4 or 5 months straight. Bled through my pants a few times. Clots, the whole 9. I'm one of those "Smart dumb guys." or "Dumb smart guys." Guess it depends on who you ask.

Symptoms (and my mental state) continued getting worse after the back pain appeared. I "knew" what was coming even though none of the kids from my generation have had it that we know of. C runs in one side of my family starting with a great grandparent.

Some details that may not be important:

I have a spectacular (but stressful) job, 4 kids, and a wonderful wife. My cup is running over every day that I open my eyes... And here I was, depression, dread, sadness, apathy, so much bad... myself and my family endured it for months and months (if I'm honest, a lesser level of it for years and years) because I'm pretty much terrified of anesthesia.

It is my only known phobia. I'll happily jump out of an airplane or go to a warzone.. I'll do both at the same time covered in spiders (just no old world, latrodectus, or loxosceles plz). I really mean that. Anesthesia scares me a lot.

So the lower back and backside stuff was stacked on on top of another relatively-severe-most-days pain that was never really gone, I've lived with it for over a decade, and as it turns out, that one was easily repairable once they got in there. At one point in the last few weeks I was on the porch, had been kinda down with the wife, not too popular with the kids lately, and said "God, heal me or kill me." Not as a taunt, but as me declaring that I didn't care which anymore, I just wanted it done with.

Pulp Fiction Time Hop:

Prep was complete and fairly low effort. With the other stuff that was going on I would call the prep "Moderately Inconvenient." I'm not saying I would do it as a hobby but it is just barely in "embrace the suck" territory. If you're comfortable being uncomfortable it probably isn't going to bother you much.

I started my prep 2 hours early because I wanted to get as much sleep as possible to keep pre-surgery inflammation down. Good for the healin'.

First 4 Bisacodyl at 10AM. It started things off real fast. By 11 I was on the can. Then at 4 I started Miralax in Gatorade Zero Cherry (not my fave but it ain't bad) ice cold. 2 quarts, 8 ounces every 15 minutes straight through. I'm thinking that total I went 8 or 10 times and they weren't really short trips. Had false stops on a couple. Cleaned myself up, washed my hands, and nearly sharted pulling my pants back up. Took great care after the first one, avoided "power painting" the bathroom. Watch that and do not trust a fart, any fart. Festivities had ceased at 10PM with one small squirt of yellow liquid after I got up this morning (6:45).

Suspenders and Existential Dread:

While sitting on the toilet I researched, shopped for, and purchased a metal detector. I guess I'm an old man now lol. Looking forward to playing with it during my recovery from the other part of surgery. Drank about 2 gallons of fluids total during the day. A quart of broth, at least a quart of black coffee, 2 quarts of gatorade (I just topped em up from 28 to 32 ounces with pure water), rest water.

The Tin Man, the Cowardly Lion, and Dorothy:

So anyway, full general anasthesia for my procedure today since I'm getting other work done that required it.

I let my anesthesiologist know my concerns ahead of time (terrified of general anesthesia) in clear terms. Among other things I said, "My face might not be showing it and my words may be careful but I am absolutely terrified right now. I understand that this is necessary for a whole bunch of reasons, and that understanding is the only reason I'm laying on this bed. I know it is probably within your power to take that fear away. I'm tired of putting the brave face on. Give me anything you like."

<morganfreeman>The good doctor looked up at the monitors and seemed to agree that this man was in fact, scared shitless.</morganfreeman>

I also informed him of my (legal) THC use. It is the only thing that has really been able to get me to sleep. It does matter. The more honest and useful information you give to your anesthesiologist, the better they can take care of you.

I've not touched any other "potentially taboo or illegal" drug since my late teens. If you've used anything recently, anything, you should tell your anesthesiologist whether you've told anyone else or not.

Lastly, I informed him that I've had 2 laryngospasms in my life, one sitting at my computer almost 20 years ago, one standing in the kitchen about 5 years ago. No idea what the cause of either was but it absolutely sucked. If it has happened to you before, your anesthesiologist won't be mad at you for telling them.

I have some medical background (Not really anything with this stuff and certainly not on a doctor's level) and he sniffed it out pretty quick, tested me a little, but never once showed his hand. What I didn't know was he had a sinister and quite foolproof plan which had already been put into action when he stepped out of the curtain briefly halfway through our chat.

Before they hooked up my IV, a very sweet attractive young lady walked in and pushed what appeared to be 3/4 of a syringe of what she called Versed into my arm while she chatted with me about nothing in particular. I had no idea what it was, what it did, or anything else really. It was cold, a little cloudy, it felt really nice, then really really nice, then really really really nice. It didn't take long to start doing its magic. If you're an anxious person this stuff is the absolute bomb. Cannot say enough good things. It is like having your mind dust bustered by a french maid.

Pfft! I'm a Genius! You can't Hypnoti:

What seemed like a couple minutes passed, I was still lucid but I had no anxiety, no fear, very little sensation of pain. My inhibitions were still present. It was as if she gave me molly, viagra, and something that really-does fix anxiety. Bad didn't feel very bad. Good felt way "gooder than good." Parts of me began waking up without my full permission. I don't think it was sexual, I think it was because I can't recall ever having felt *that* good. It apparently happens sometimes? I'm not ashamed, you shouldn't be either if it happens to you.

When they told me to lay back, the thought in my head at that moment, was "How does this blanket feel so good against my fingertips?" I was absolutely rolling.

Then this absolute genius of a man puts an oxygen mask over my face and says "Here let me give you some 100% oxygen."

Unplanned Time Travel and a Genius Doctor:

My conscious brain would have normally questioned this moment but the Versed brain was like "Oooooh I wonder what this is going to feel like on whatever they just doped me up with."

I inhaled deeply, held it for just a moment, exhaled, it felt nice. Then I inhaled deeply again.

About halfway through inhaling my second breath of pure oxygen I woke up in recovery. 3 hours had passed, I was quite relaxed and in no pain.

He slipped me a mickey! That wasn't 100% oxygen at all!

I know tricking someone who is chasing butterflies may not be the genius move I'm making it out to be, but the impact on how I went in and came back out was absolutely wonderful. I really just couldn't be happier with how that went.

The Part You've Been Scrolling For:

The other surgery went great as far as I can tell. I have more horsepower in my right arm than I have had in years. No nerve pain.

The colonoscopy went without a hitch. 2 small polyps removed, some very bleedy hemorrhoids, no cancer. My butt doesn't hurt, I'm a little gassy now almost 12 hours after. The only thing on my body that hurts right now is where they waxed my back (I'm a hairy SOB). Not the incision or the staples (maybe stitches? I haven't looked), the wax.

I have no idea why the lower back pain went away, I'm also not going to look a gift horse in the mouth.

A colonoscopy is nothing to be afraid of. Even if you're sure that you are a dead man, you're probably not. Go get looked at. We're all in this together.

EDIT.. D+1.
I feel like a 20 year old. No pain still other than the wax job and dressing tape pulling my hair. I'm starting to feel some hope that it might not come back. I only got about 2 1/2 hours sleep last night, I still feel like a 20 year old. Energized and practically tapdancing around the house.

This is wild.