Started at 39, HRT, orchi, numerous laser sessions for my face, four electrology sessions for my face. And a massive amount of practice in confidence.

I would sit at the screen and look at all of the beautiful women around my age, and never thought I could do it. Somehow, somehow, just wow

To be clear, she's doesn't have an issue with trans people and is not entirely against my transition, it more stems from the fact that she's straight.

She liked me for who I was, despite me hating myself. Coming to terms with that dichotomy has honestly my biggest struggle.The more I lived as a man, the more I hated myself and transitioning had alleviated that (to an extent). But the more I transitioned, the more she lost parts of me she loved. It's painful knowing that no matter what I do (transition or not), someone will hurt in the end.

Anyways, we're still together despite her being into men, because she loves me. It hasn't been perfect, but we've manged. Recently I told her about how I wanted to get FFS because I hate parts of my face and how they make me feel and she understands that. But at the same time, she said that if I did that, she's not sure she can continue being with me becauseshe simply isn't attracted to women. HRT changing me has already been hard for her and FFS would be a big step in making me look less "manly."

I knew this would probably come up eventually, but I'd hoped that maybe she'd realize her sexality isn't as ridged as she thought, but clearly that isn't the case and its sad. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me, but it just doesn't seem to be in the cards. We've talked about an open relationship type of situation, but she's more traditional in that sense. I understand her position on that, its not everyone's cup of tea. So, I guess it is what it is.

Pic is of me the other day, trying to feel good about myself.

I definitely think I can pull off either style nowadays!

Just wanted to show my results as ive been feelign nostalgic lately. I started HRT early 2021 and have been on and off ever since (mostly on though there has been some big gaps due to finance, longest was 6 months, current is about 4)

Ive had one surgery which was to help with weight loss cause im an emotional eater :L but beside that the estrogen has worked its magic, making me look younger and much more feminine.

So don't let anyone tell you its too late to start living your truth.

I so love this blue body suit!!!!

Sooooo I told someone at corporate on 09/27 that I was trans, but had been hiding for the last 20 years with the company because I was afraid of discrimination.

This week suddenly there is an issue with my performance coming from corporate, and the evidence they have for the issue actually shows that I was doing exactly what they instruct us to do...

So I told my boss that I am trans, and starting to transition, and then I called HR, and told them, but they are suspiciously uninterested in making any documentation of the fact until I have LEGAL changes to make to my employee file.

They pay STRONG lip service to not discriminating, and HR is like "there's been lots before you and will probably be lots after you to transition at the company".

Am I just being paranoid? I feel like this means I need to accelerate my timeline significantly. I wanted to at least get a few years of HRT under my belt before pushing for name change and gender marker change on my ID, but I'm afraid I've fucked myself by rushing ahead.

Please advise me!

I really don't want to have to start looking for a new job after being with them for 20 years, that's like the biggest flag any hiring manager could have for some casual age discrimination.

MtF (46) on HRT for one year

Office Halloween party outfit sorted 🎃

It’s been exactly 3 years and every morning I wake up just like this:: grateful

This was my post from yesterday.

Three years ago I didn’t know how much my life would change, how much peace and joy I would feel as I became my authentic self. Trans joy is really something amazing!

Getting to run in a place like this is my absolute favorite!!

Happy Wednesday! May morning bring you courage and evening bring you peace. May every worry loosen and every burden cease.

Good morning. 💜

I really didn’t want to come to school today.
There is a cumulative weight to working in an environment where I am professionally useful, yet not consistently recognised as belonging. I teach, collaborate, support students, and bring decades of experience and considerable education to my work. But being competent, even exceptionally so, does not necessarily mean being accepted as a peer.

There is a peculiar contradiction in the public imagination of American education. The far-right caricature has teachers performing gender-affirming surgeries on children between maths lessons, as though public schools were laboratories of radical liberalism. The reality is rather less imaginative.

An institution can proclaim inclusion, celebrate diversity, and promote belonging whilst maintaining a culture in which an autistic, queer, trans woman must repeatedly establish her right to exist amongst her colleagues.

Inclusion as an institutional philosophy does not necessarily produce belonging as a lived condition.

And the accumulated effect is exhausting. Not because I dislike teaching—I love teaching—but because every morning requires entering a social field in which recognition cannot be assumed, safety cannot be taken for granted, and yesterday’s injuries are expected to have disappeared by today.

So I get dressed.

I’ve noticed a pattern emerging in my choices. Long, flowing tunics over maxi skirts. Colour, flowers, comfortable fabrics, and silhouettes that accommodate my rather substantial frame without asking me to become smaller. Today it’s lavender and pink blossoms against black, layered pearls, and Midnight Purple nails.

A little colour. A little fun. Something pretty.

Clothing cannot repair a toxic workplace. Pearls cannot manufacture belonging. But I can create a small part of my morning that belongs entirely to me.

I am not dressing to disappear.

And today, perhaps, the flowers are carrying a little of what I cannot.

Good morning. 🌸

four years and three months between these photos, and somehow an entire lifetime

the first was taken during one of the earliest moments i felt truly free to be myself. i had no idea how much my life would change, how much i’d lose, or how much i’d have to survive to get here

three years and three months on hormones, and the changes have been so much more than physical. i’ve learned to feel things i never knew how to feel before, and i’ve experienced more beauty, heartbreak, gratitude, and grief than i ever imagined

i’m still learning how to love the person i’ve become while grieving the life i thought i’d have

a small note about the second photo - i’m currently dealing with roughly 10 lbs of fluctuating fluid retention that specialists are still investigating. it was particularly bad in my legs that day, so they don’t always look like that

same heels, four years apart, and a whole lifetime in between 🌸

I had two rounds of FFS, most recent a year ago. But got called young man today.

Candid horrible selfies attached. Has anyone else still been seen as a guy post FFS? I started HRT and everything in my 30s

\enhanced photos\

Was having fun with lighting and creativity to fight the bad thoughts and self hatred (I’m still accepting that I’m becoming a chubby girl).

Seen some side profile images of myself yesterday and it had me in tears. So I guess FFS might have to be an option for me, or rhinoplasty at the very least.

Anyway it’s been so long since I’ve gotten creative with my photography and perhaps one day I’ll share some other works but it was so fulfilling and fun to test new things & put makeup on myself instead of someone else now that I’m 9 months into my HRT journey. I still don’t see her the way I want but she’s there at least 😌💜

My egg cracked as transfem/nonbinary a few years ago. Started E monotherapy with a low-ish dose 3 months ago, and have been delighted at the mental effects but not expecting much to happen physically from just that (in my 50s).

...and now in the past couple of weeks my nipples have gotten consistently tender and hurt whenever something bonks into them.

Well, then. Who am I to complain?