Has anyone else loved baby Einstein since they were in the target demographic? When I was a toddler this was my very first special interest. I was obsessed with it and I still use it to this day to self regulate. It is one of my favorite things in the whole world. I love watching them. However, I have to watch the original versions that I grew up watching. I require the exact same fbi warning pages and production company logos in the exact order. I do not like that Baby Einstein changed and modified this as well as some of the toys. I am attached to very specific VHS copies. I have noticed that this is rather beloved in autistic people. I have an idea as to why, but if you love or loved Baby Einstein, please let me know what you love about it. I am curious.

Content warning for neglect, both self-inflicted and not! Also some suicide discussion, but brief.

I have level 2 autism, but I also have really bad chronic fatigue. We don’t entirely know the cause yet, but it could be from anything like lupus to brain injury complications. It’s quite severe fatigue, I often need at least 20 hours of sitting and resting on a day I don’t do anything, and any amount of going out somewhere and doing something always throws me out for a few days. Even if it’s just walking up to the corner store or taking a shower.

A few weeks ago, my grandma fell and sprained her ankles. Very thankfully, she’s okay! She has healed up perfectly and doesn’t have any lasting pain. This being said, she had to use a walker for a while and had to live with us for about two weeks. She also is in the middle stages of dementia.

My mom, dad, and brother were there, but because I was always physically closest to her she always called for me to do things for her. I always tried to do it and quickly, but I was often in severe pain or actively falling asleep and stumbling around while doing that thing. It was simple things like making her coffee, but it was still rough.

There were some things I couldn’t do, and she was mean about them. I very often need help from my parents to do things like cook on the stove or things, and one time when I told her I’d need help with something she asked me, “what can you even do?”

We bickered a lot, I always tried to be kind but she doesn’t understand the concept of boundaries. This isn’t necessarily a dementia thing, she’s always been weird when I try to set boundaries. I remember when I was a kid, I would often ask her to not barge into the bathroom when I’m using it because I’m often naked. She laughed in my face and told me I was being “too much”.

I’m a bit fat, but I’ve previously struggled with disordered eating behaviors. I’m pretty chill in my body now and I’m totally chill with being called fat neutrally or positively, but I don’t like when people call me it negatively as it brings those negative behaviors back up strongly. I walked up to her one day and she patted my stomach, and told me unprompted I need to start walking. I got upset and asked her not to say that about me, and she laughed and said that it was okay because she needed to, too.

I’m a person who’s incredibly strong on my boundaries and I need them to be respected to avoid meltdowns. I also have cptsd, so boundaries being disrespected are often a major ptsd trigger. I understand that at this point she probably wouldn’t be able to remember my boundaries to respect them which I totally understand! I just don’t know how to navigate this however, as I’m very rigid with my needs.

I cannot be a caretaker like I was for her over these weeks. I maybe showered once and couldn’t even fix myself food to eat a lot of the time, so I went hungry or lived on rice crispy treats. I’ll make sure someone else is taken care of before me, so I was having to sacrifice many self care aspects for her safety. Now to clarify, she wasn’t in danger of neglect as my mom covered that, just in danger of not having her coffee or cigarettes lol. I don’t regret doing this as I didn’t want her uncomfortable, but woof it was hard. I already heavily struggle with self care, but when I finally got into the shower after all that I cried from relief as it’d been about a month since my last one at that point. (I was struggling a bit beforehand as well which is why it took so long)

It’s hard for me to do many ADLs by myself, even some basic ones. But I have no help lol😭😭so i go without a lot

I don’t mean to air her info out here so I’ll keep this brief and vague, but she did have an incident I was responsible for cleaning up. Totally not her fault, it absolutely happens and she could not get to the bathroom fast as she couldn’t walk normally. But the stress of cleaning up fecal matter all by myself was absolutely intense and may have been my mental breaking point, I fully realized I was completely over my head then

She also is very talkative. This is fine, that’s totally her personality and that is great! But i can maybe handle a few sentences every few minutes some days before im overstimulated… and i just feel bad.

My aunts are nurses, so she could absolutely live with them once her dementia gets severe enough, but i do know it’s likely she’ll want to live with us. I don’t think I can take that, I was a genuine suicide risk after 2 weeks lol. Lovingly, my mental health still hasn’t recovered pfft.

I love her, I care for her. I cannot live with her. It won’t just be bad for me, I know she was miserable too because i had multiple meltdowns in my moms room and i know she felt bad/guilty/weirded out by it. Shes very self-guilty and will internalize things, so I just worry that she thinks i hate her now because I was overwhelmed. I worry about her a lot cause she takes things hard. I am pretty sure she’s also autistic as well, my mom and dad def are too.

I’m just very stressed over this possibility. I don’t have much say at all in what happens in my home life, as my mom sees it as her home so she can get the day. Fair enough, but I also don’t have a place I could go. If I severely self neglect, I don’t have many people who’d notice as my mom and dad work a lot and are often too stressed to notice things like that about me, so I’d be left to rot alone I feel. Idk I’m just worried.

He is the retired Douglas Bingley plush. I love stuffed animals.

Used ChatGPT to make an Autism Acceptance coloring page of my pup, thought you all might enjoy it

People tell me I’m smart a lot for stuff that’s not smart. It looks good like I can be happy they are saying it but I’m not and it doesn’t feel good it feels bad because they say it to much and they say it when I do not smart stuff just stuff anyone can do…like I took a uber to go buy something and everyone was like OMG wow you can take a uber you are soooooooo smart!!!!! It’s like that all the time if I say or do something like the uber or sometimes I walk to my friends house and I don’t call her 1st because she doesn’t text me back ever anyway and when I said it they were like wow sooo smart you are like just anytime I talk or do anything it’s your so smart

hi, i have a sleep disorder

most of the time i am sleeping very late and waking up early afternoon

my new psychiatrist thinks this is important to fix and wants me to try a med for sleep but it may not work due to my disorder

however she wants me sleeping before midnight waking up early in the morning and i don't want that at all

i live with 4 people one of them is my caretaker the rest i am not used to they are very unfamiliar. and two of them are younger than me and during the daytime can be loud

when it is daytime it's bright outside and loud in the house and scary to leave my room because of unfamiliar people and the cars outside are loud and i can hear the tv in the next room and etc etc

when it's nighttime the house is quiet and i am the only one awake and it's dark out and there are less cars and i have more control over my environment and i can leave my room easier

the psychiatrist says it's very important to fix my sleep but i cannot tolerate the idea of only being awake during the day and am freaking out and crying thinking of that, having no time to relax and cool down from the day, just always being in that state all the time

i know it's bad to have my sleep be messed up but i just cannot deal with it always being daytime 🥹🥹🥹 i don't know what to do because she says it's important

Hello. You can call me Jedi or Canis. Let me tell you about myself. I am a lvl 2 autistic adult. I am not sure if this is relevant information or if I have to explain why I fit here, but I was diagnosed 3 times in early childhood and once in adulthood. I am here because I have been looking for a place that is suitable for me for a very long time. I do not fit in with high masking low support needs people and am often made fun of by them. Most autism spaces online are made up mostly of low support needs high masking people and unfortunately they tend not to appreciate the way I speak. I am often made fun of for “yapping” or “trying to sound smart.” I enjoy talking and informing, but can’t seem to get a hold of the rules. This means it is hard to make friends. I would consider myself, despite my life of informing, to suffer from situational mutism caused by extreme fear in situations I find stressful, which can include speaking to doctors, talking to and communicating with cashiers, bus drivers, and related situations where I have to express my needs in public or to strangers. I use an AAC to make sure that I can say what I need to instead of trying to push through, as this causes stuttering and shortened sentences. It helps me say exactly what I need to say. I do not entirely rely on it, however, and the longer you know me, the less I will have to use it. I rely completely on a precise and absolute perfect routine and if it is interrupted in any way shape or form, I struggle to care for my body, my space, and feed myself. I exist in a constant paradox of being unable to maintain a routine because I’m unable to maintain a routine and therefore unable to care for myself because I’m unable to form a routine and cannot form a routine because I cannot care for myself and so on. I spent my entire adult life trying to no avail to acquire a job, utilizing services to do so. I survive off of SSI (if anyone needs help figuring that out, I am well aware how sorely it is needed, and I can inform you to the best of my ability.) My special interest is canids and Star Wars as well as a growing interest in aviation, particularly jets. Please do not read into what I say. I do not have double meanings or read between the lines. This is the main point of conflict interacting online. If I come off blunt, please let me know if I have accidentally hurt feelings. I promise I do not mean it. I hope I can make friends here. Please let me know if I accidentally break a rule. I will not do it on purpose.

Me no post. Word no work good. Anyone else? How fix?

Content warning: Sexual violence.

I was diagnosed with autism at 5, I'm 22 now, and since January of last year, I've been living the worst stretch of life I could have ever imagined. I've been sexually assaulted by a friend, gone through a breakup, and lost my dog (the other one is not long for this world, either.) All this has led to a miserable burnout. I've always kind of been burnt out for as long as I can remember, but after all of these traumas, it has never been worse.

I have no motivation to do anything. I go through the day spaced out, unable to be present no matter how hard I want to be. I only have brief moments of clarity, where I'm able to really think in a way I never have in my life, it's more than just telling myself the words I know are supposed to help, I actually know HOW to think beyond these phrases, to problem solve, to motivate myself, to change things. I'm nicer to my family in these rare hours, more energy, more willingness to do things. I actually want to get out of bed when I feel this way. I don't have to push myself at all.

I wanted to do so much with my life, but i feel like I have no control over it anymore. The doctors have given me medication, but that's only stabilizing my mood, not igniting the spark within me. After seeing what it's like to actually be aware and able to think, I realize just how untreated and severely mentally unwell I've been for my entire life.

Has anybody had similar experiences? Anyone who's gotten through to this clear headspace? Do you have any advice? I'm so tired of being so profoundly sick all the time.

Greetings, spicy friends.

My partner is a fantastic human, friend, and parent, but one communication pattern keeps tripping us up.

Tonight she told me she’d found a therapist. The therapist’s availability conflicts with something on my end because of a temporary health issue. I blurted out that I hoped it resolves soon so I could minimize the conflict.

She heard that as my first thought being about myself, and as me being unwilling to support her after all she’s supported me through. I was caught off guard. I do want to support this, and I know how important it is. I’d been interjecting a few words at a time, trying to get her to slow down and hear me, and she got upset about the interjecting too.

I tried something my therapist and I had discussed. I said I know she’s done a lot of learning about autism, and I’d like to understand where that shows up between us, because I’m feeling alone. She became defensive again before I got further.

How do you break a loop like this, where trying to be heard gets read as not listening?

the car has been my safe place since i was little. i LOVED road trips, i could be in the car while it was driving for endless hours and not get bored bc i just looked out the window and it feels so nice. but this past year i developed anxiety where i think we’re gonna crash all the time. any time we are remotely close to another car or driving fast i am terrified. my heart drops all the time and my foot is pressing for a break that’s not there. i mostly only feel this way in the front seat, and the anxiety developed due to specific reasons i don’t really feel comfy getting into. no car crash tho.

also i don’t drive, it’s not safe for me to. so my partner has to drive the whole 10 hours which is okay with them, they don’t mind.

i dont want to sit in the back bc one there’s no AC back there and two i really like sitting up with my partner it’s fun and makes the trip best for both of us and also towards the end they need me to make sure they stay focused (tho they’re on adhd meds now so should be much easier for them to focus!!)

i think it’ll be really good exposure in chilling out about being in the car. and im gonna bring activities to help keep busy, we’re gonna listen to lots of music, etc. but i really don’t want to panic every 5 minutes for 10 hours 😞 it’s easier to manage just around town bc it’s not the whole day. if anyone has advice i’d appreciate it :) but pls be gentle

I got into manifesting and was trying to manifest me to have a good happy time and life but I feel like I’m messing up on manifesting and no one will help me and I’m bad at reading so it’s hard for me to read more on how to do it I hate my life so much all I want to do is manifest it better

First i tried applying to a job and they said they would call me on wednesday and then they ghosted me :(

and then i had to do 2 hard tests in a row and now im super burnt out and tired.

I am looking into getting DDA so hopefully i wont be dropped off a cliff once i am an adult cause i am really scared about not getting the support i need when im older. my parents said they would help but i feel bad relying on them for everything.

I met my new occupational therapist today. He’s nice.

I wanted help finding an office chair that would fit and help me sit up. Turns out I need a lot more support and he thinks it’s time for wheelchair.

Mom said no wheelchair in past. I’m 26 and allowed to make own decisions but I live with Mom right now.

I try telling Mom about my appointment but as soon as I mentioned wheelchair she stop talking. She giving me silent treatment. I don’t know what to do.

It makes me so upset I can’t talk about my life with Mom because she my only support.

I need to vent. I live on my own with my cat. I have care for 2 hours a day and then I am left completely on my own. All my friends have lives and jobs and uni and stuff to do so they're always busy. I need social interaction a lot and if I don't I can get upset and stressed and can have meltdowns and sometimes I hurt myself during them. I struggle a lot with inertia where I cannot stop something once it has started, or I cannot start something at all. I have spent all day doing nothing because one of my friends indicated she may be online to voice chat with me this evening. Since then I have had no response. A couple of my friends do this thing where they will indicate they might be up to hang out later in the day but never give a solid time or confirm if they are for sure coming on and it makes me want to cry and rip my hair out. I tell them I need structure and I need a definitive time to know when they are coming online so I can plan my day around it. Because if they don't give me a time I am stuck in limbo all day. I cannot initiate any tasks. I cannot do anything but sit here and wait. Sometimes I nap to pass the time. I napped today and now it is 9pm and nobody has replied to any of my messages and I feel close to self injurious meltdown because I feel so alone and nobody will even reply to me to say "I can't hang out today." I just want a reply I just want anything at all to know I've been heard and to know whether i should be wsiting here still or not. They never understand that when I say I need structure that means they need to give me exact details like a time and a definitive "yes I am coming online today" or "no I am not coming online today" and I always feel like a horrible nag for having to ask but we've been friends for over 10 years and I don't think they will ever get the message that I need this structure. If they just said "no I can't hang out" it would be ok and it would release me and allow me to try and do something else but because they've said "I might hop on later" now I feel like I physically cannot do anything at all in case they hop online and I miss it. I want to cry. I don't want to manipulate them or anything but I am so desperate for any kind of response I have been sending more texts to ask if they will be coming on. I feel so horrible I feel so alone there is nobody to talk to me

I know I already posted today, but I’m in a difficult situation. I’m not in crisis, but I need two opposite things at the same time. You see, my moderate support needs requires an adult day program where you can’t escape for free, or without barriers, but I think I have agoraphobia, it’s preventing me from enjoying the autism support I need. Autism “support staff” literally don’t understand, my stomach TIGHTENS from the thought of being stuck in these social situations with escape barriers! How am I supposed to accommodate both conditions if I need daily supervision, but also need escape barriers? I have as needed anxiety meds, but I don’t want to take them anymore because it’ll make me too sleepy during the day. Part of this is my sensory overload, which I wear noise canceling headphones that are SUPPOSED TO help, but don’t. Can someone comment me words of comfort? My coping skills aren’t good enough.

everyone i did it!!! tuesday i did not have first procedure, had bad bad BAD panic attack, so moved it to today. everything done today!

i wake up 4:30 am, i go to hospital with dad, everyone so nice. they gave my stitch sticker and matching bracelets with me, and a hair net too for when we go back into operating room

was really scared in there, ended up crying and feeling kinda bad cause the medicine to sleep made me feel like i gonna throw up, but nurses held my hands whole time and tell me im doing good and to breathe, and then that last thing i remember, i wake up after in post-op(?) room

they gave me anti-nausea medicine in post-op room , i sip water and eat ice, then they take me out to my dad and i go home

got home sleep 3 more hours now more awake , i sip more water to make sure my tummy is ok, feel sleepy still but OKAY!!, gonna eat finallyyy my mom make me bread with butter :D

me and stitch wer so brave today. here a picture of him with his bracelets and sticker on! did not get picture in hospital of him with hair net ontoo cause that when they take me back to operating room. lucky they let me take him in and he stay with me whole time in there!!!

Is there any food you love, but must be in a certain type of packaging? For example, I love raisins, but not the ones that come from tiny boxes, in this case I can tell the difference. The raisins that come from tiny boxes tend to have a rough and stale texture to me. The raisins that come from canisters are slightly wrinkly, but soft and chewy, sometimes it’s also sweeter in flavor as well. Those are how I like my raisins, sweet, soft and chewy. Probably cuz they’re naturally dried, like sun dried. For you it may be a different food that you feel the same way about. I cannot enjoy boxed raisins, but some other raisins are fine. I would not pay extra for the convenience of raisins. I know some of you who may be from a different country or region use the term raisins for grapes in general, but I am talking about dried grapes. I also experience that with ramen noodles, I can’t enjoy it in a cup with dehydrated vegetables where I have to make it into a soup. I must have bagged ramen noodles, and drain the water of the plain noodles mix with the seasoning and butter or nut butter, my mom made it like that too. I can’t eat a cup of noodles meal, it’s got those soggy vegetables, and no flavor is left in the noodles, the flavor gets in the water instead, and I end up spilling hot water. People think it’s all the same and I should enjoy both the same way, but I can tell the difference. Anyone else?

I get workers who take me out and do stuff with me sometimes I want them to drop me off and wait for me in the car but the worker and my mom and my team I have all will not let me. My team makes like for you what you can and can’t do with your workers when you go out and in my ones it says that workers have to be like a arm away from me and have to see me at all times….so I have a new meeting going on next week but I don’t think they will let me take it off. I have friends with autism too who get the same as me and they get to me drop off by there staff a lot of times it’s how I want it for me but no one will let me.

I can’t see hear or feel anything in my head so like I can’t daydream or pretend to be on the beach in my head or something. And it makes a lot hard for me to I can’t remember what people talk to me I can’t keep there words in my head I can’t talk in my head it’s all so bad and I hate it

hi everyone

lately i have noticed i have been having sensory overload from very little

for example watching a short quiet video on my phone that does not have intense audio or visuals is often enough to put me into sensory overload and i cannot use most social medias

i am also having a hard time with my pets and have not been able to let them sit on me for a long time and i get upset by the noises they make

i am having a hard time with it and it is kind of frightening because i do not know why it is getting harder and there are not as many things i can do because of basic things often causing sensory overload

has anyone had periods before where their sensory issues got worse quite quickly and for you did it stay or go away eventually. also when you have low sensory tolerance does anyone have recommendations on how to be able to do things or do i just have to not watch videos and stuff

i have been having a harder time overall getting worse for a year or two now and i do not understand why. it was never good but keeps getting harder.

thank you

I reached out to the autism on the go website to see if there were any support groups for msn and hsn people and they said they'd be open to that but they need someone to lead it. I think I'm too shy to tho. But if you want to you can send them an email here https://autismonthego.org/contact/

C.W. discussions of mental health, CPS, being sectioned and death.

Don't fully even know what to say.

I'm a 17 year old in Ireland with ASD level 2. I live in residential because my dad forfeited care when I was 16 because I'm mentally unwell.

Not mildly. in 3-4 months I've had well over 20 episodes resulting in A&E, Garda intervention or being medically admitted for severe self harm. I'm on 1:1 and generally not allowed outside.

I'm being told I will probably die by doctors and social care workers. I don't want to die but I also don't fully believe I can die. I know if the doctors are saying that I've been very lucky then I should think twice but I just can't trust my mortality without evidence. Who knows, maybe I can't die, I don't have definitive proof I can die, it'd be more an educated def but, there is no way to know for sure someone is mortal until they die.

I love my residential, it's the most at home I've felt but I know I can't just live like this for ever, I need and want help. CAMHS)the mental health services aren't doing much, they haven't seen me since the 5th because I can't attend even home based appointments with severe incidents. They like to attribute my whole presentation to ASD and deny responsiblity. I might lose my placement if incidents keep occuring this often.

Today I was discharged from hospital again. The adult A&E mental health team can't do more then give a vague safety plan that's failed over and over.

I was encouraged by a staff from the residential to contact services that could legally reposent me because just contacting my GAL isn't changing things.

She did warn me. She said that I'd need to put formal complaints to the HSE(overseas CAMHS) and TUSLA. I was also encouraged to advocate for my records to be reviewed externally form CAMHS given the potential bias or neglect. She warned me that putting in these complaints and applications could very possibly mean im removed from the placement I love and/or mean my rights to make my own medical decisions could be removed long term. If I'm sectioned it could affect me years down the line or stop me have rights to make decisions as an adult. It's possible I could be forced into an adult psych ward for years without a say.

I feel sick. I don't want to lose my home. I don't know if losing the right to make medical decisions would harm or help. She said that if I want to live advocating for this is my best interest even if it could have consequences. I agree, I think?

I've contacted services, I just feel confused and conflicted. I wish I could access mental health supports without my ASD causing potential diagnostic overshadowing. Multiple A&E doctors have suggested OCD and I had been referred for an assessment when I was 15 but CAMHS refused to do it because I'm autistic.

It seems the only potential for a full assessment is to go down legal roads to get an external assessment from CAMHS. It seems they will turn a blind eye. risking my home and rights may be the only way to live.

I'm so scared and confused. I just want some hope because I'm terrified I'm ruining my life by seeking help. I'm worried how the system has or will fail me as an autistic person with mental health struggles.