It's a little unconventional, but I'm proud to say it works.

You have to get one of your crew members to dress up like Kahless the Unforgettable. Then when the Klingons show up, you hail them while holding a knife to Kahless' throat. You say "Hey Turtleheads, lookie here. We brought Kahless back to life. Yeah, that's right, baby. We're Starfleet. We bring the dead back all the time. Now, you let us go save these idiots and we'll let Kahless live. If not, it's 'hasta la vista' to Klingon Jesus, get me?"

Then, if they seem uncertain, tell them that if they let you rescue the ship, in return you'll not only let Kahless live, you'll beam them over two metric tons of the best goddamn blood pie they've ever crammed into their gaghholes, like it's straight from Grandma's dungeon. You can replicate some blood pie if you want to show it to them as an example. You don't need to make the whole two tons; just a tableful will do.

They can't resist. I mean, who could?

It's been my dream to be in Starfleet since I was just a little Kirk. I've finally been promoted to Commander. I was on an away mission when I hit it off with a Gorn. He was charming, and I kinda developed a man-crush on him.

One thing led to another, and when I returned to my ship, I discovered that I had a bunch of Gorn babies in me. I wasn't planning to be a father this soon in my career. Plus, I've tried everything to get in touch with my baby daddy, but he won't return my calls. This is tearing me apart.

What should I do?

A few weeks ago we were conducting some experiments on the warp engines, something went wrong and I somehow ended up in a parallel universe. So far, the only difference I've noticed is that the replicator in my quarters is on the opposite wall. Otherwise, everything is the same. Frankly, it's a living hell. Having the replicator in that spot completely throws off the whole vibe of my quarters. It happened a few times that I got up in the middle of the night and I ended up trying to order a glass of water from an empty wall because I'm just so used to having the replicator there.

Now, I've done quite a bit of research and I think I've found a way to return to my original universe but it's quite risky and has a high chance of not only destroying this universe, but all universes throughout reality. I don't care, it's worth the risk. I'd rather not exist than live like this.

Chrysler Voyager

Why couldn't this have happened for real? It would have been a game changer!

Get outta here with this espresso mug just give me my 1 litre pitcher of Dr Pepper Cherry

Excited about space travel.

Have a layover at a space station.

Drinks were good. Bartender is funny.

Go window shopping. Got a shirt. I think the tailor was flirting with me.

Might try Klingon food later.

Viewscreens all light up. It's Space Hitler.

"ATTENTION BAJORAN WORKERS"

Replicator starts 3d printing a gun.

People are dying.

Just another day in the Federation.

I'm not going into details but my tinkering with the computer has resulted in the replicator losing the ability to make coffee.

Is there a way to recover from this or should I just beam myself into space now?

Star Trek : The Search for Spock - an alien ship called V’Ger searches for Spock…sort of.

Star Trek 2 : Nemesis - Kirk faces Khan, his old nemesis

Star Trek 3: The Voyage Home - Kirk rescues Spock and takes him back to his home on Vulcan

Star Trek 4: Generations - Kirk and crew travels back several generations back in time to save th whales.

Star Trek 5: Beyond - The enterprise explores beyond the great barrier

Star Trek 6: Insurrection - Kirk must foil a mounting insurrection on the verge of Klingon Peace.

Star Trek : The Motion Picture - The launching of the TNG crew on the big screen.

Star Trek : the Borg must be stopped by “Astronauts on some kind of Star Trek”

Star Trek: The undiscovered country - Picard and crew discover a planet with healing rings.

Star Trek: Into Darkness - Picard and crew must deal with Dark Remans and Dark Romulans

Star Trek: First Contact - Nu Trek contacts the old trek.

Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan - he’s more than a nemesis this time, he’s Benedict cumberbatch.

Star Trek: The final Frontier - The final movie of the new crew. (Unless the next one gets made…)

Edit: Damn shittyreddit posted this before it was ready. Movie titles updated.

Does anyone else miss old school rap like this? What was your favourite album or track?

Alpha quadrant side fo life.

Data was merely puzzled at being kissed out of the blue, and later even returned the gesture - also without asking.

So I don’t normally work in sickbay, but Torres was upset because I was caught with a bio-neural jell pack…. anyway. The Dr needed someone to analyze the nano probes and I got voluntold. So I’m carrying the sample across sickbay when I tripped and the sample landed all over my face. I know I swallowed some. How long before I start calling 7 my queen?

In light of the recent Trek/LOTR crossover hype 👍

I used to think this was pretty clear cut. Most starships names are referred to using the definite article. The Enterprise. The Reliant. The Defiant.

It seemed pretty clear that Voyager was an exception. Voyager. But then I hear Lieutenant Paris call it The Voyager.

For some reason, the NX-01 Enterprise is just referred to as Enterprise. Did this show take place before the word the was invented?

I am most confused by the original NCC-1701. It's The Enterprise, right? Well, maybe only if you're serving under Captain Kirk? Under Captain Pike, it's just Enterprise.

I'm so the confused!

I know the show runners got enough flack about that so they will definitely include it just to spite the fans.

I miss how tos wasn’t political at all. This tng stuff is slop