Anyone else? The fatigue started a couple days ago. This morning, I could barely get out of bed.

Yes, there’s the depression and anxiety side of things — but the physical exhaustion and loss of motivation I feel even 10 days out is probably the most intense part.

I just want to sleep. And keep sleeping…

Ive tried so many things. Zoloft, Lexapro, Prozac. I tried Slynd two years ago but had some side effects. On it again now, helped during lutheal, but now im feeling terrible.

The fact is that it has gone too far. im 38 soon 39 and i cant accept my life as it is. PMDD has ruined a lot, but also my life in general I guess. but i think the pmdd have been major in messing with my direction in life and my self esteem. i had great grades and was pretty popular and with many friends back in high school. I was a kind girl with low self worth though (it sounds braggy, but i really feel that way now - i see how i was kind and good enough, but always felt less than). my parents helped me and wanted my best. i was fortunate, but it still never clicked for me.

My friends have passed me in this path of life, they are having kid nr 1, 2 and 3. And i want to die with this approaching. Im single and and struggling with PMDD-depression, and also a more and more general depression due to how my life became nothing like i had hoped and wished for. And also had the possibilty to have a family, hadnt it been for different difficulties and pmdd.

i dont know what to do, i have a decent job and a flat and my dear dog. But i dont want to continue living because of the inner pain i feel and how my surroundings mirror back to me my worst nightmare: alone, childless, single, still struggling.

Maybe Slynd is affecting my thoughts, but they are also rooted in reality. I so wanted Slynd to work, since they did help in lutheal.

thanks for this group. I wish things were different for everyone with PMDD.
And i just want to disappear, cause my life became nothing like it could have been, and Im so lonely and sad so often. A failure and with the lost prospect of having children- i want to leave this story and never come back to it, its too painfull.

yay PMOS/PCOS and PMDD/PME!!! confusing ass experiences, bit scared since my period has been regular my whole life so far (i am not pregnant because i do not have sex with penises) (i do have a doctors appt to check in just wanted to vent 💓💓💓)

I haven’t left home in years. I go through cycles of being depressed and feeling I’m not a real person to being perfectly fine for a couple of days. Most of the time I have this sense of hopelessness, like my life is nearing its end. The world feels fake, like idk how I’m even interacting with things in the world, they don’t look solid, it’s like I’m living life in a dream. Some days I can’t decide which hobby to give my time to and on others I lose interest in everything in life and nothing keeps my attention. I start feeling trapped inside this body, feeling a strong urge to escape it. My parents are neglectful so they never really get me medical help or even validate what I’m experiencing, they tell me it’s all in my head cause I’m diagnosed with anxiety and that it isn’t a big deal. But i don’t feel like a human being, shouldn’t that be concerning ? I don’t take my eyes off screens for long cause it makes me super uncomfortable watching the real world, I’m so used to living in my head that life feels alien, like looking at my hands and feet while not being able to see my face unsettles me.

I vented to a close friend months ago about pmdd, and how it ruins my life. She’s going to school for psych, and i guess someone brought up pmdd and the class talked about it.

When i vented to her, she couldn’t fathom how im not on birth control. She said “it will make your pmdd go away” and at this point i just wanted to change the subject lol.

I was on birth control for 6 years in my teen years, if anything, it made everything worse. Then in 2020 i tried yaz for 2 months, and literally thought i was going to end my life.

If birth control works for you- that’s amazing, i just wish people were more informed on this disorder before suggesting a “cure” and i also wish she realized that birth control doesnt help everyone with pmdd. And i know a lot of you on BC mention you still have symptoms too!

Just frustrating and needed to vent. This friend has been exhausting me for years. I’m about to just go no contact.

Wow, that was quick! It feels like only yesterday we were playing bingo for 150k members.

We now have 160k members and couldn't be more grateful that each one of you is here, engaging in this community and making it the amazing space that it is. We couldn't do it without you.

Let's play a spooky game to celebrate.

For anyone new to two-sentence horror stories, check out r/TwoSentenceHorror

Drop your best two-sentence PMDD horror story in the comments below.

This is so hard.

Hi everyone else on the struggle bus.

Just now figuring out and being diagnosed with PMDD. I am 35 now. I also have Autism, GAD, CPTSD, and a panic disorder. The past months that this has flared up we just assumed it was bad health anxiety. Which don't get me wrong, it absolutely impacted my health anxiety but that is pretty well managed now that I have a name for what the heck was making me feel so off during the first half of the month.

Now to this month. This has hands down been the worst one mentally. I was in the ER exactly a week ago because I hadn't slept in 48 hours and was stuck in a panic/anxiety loop. They gave me Ativan to help with the anxiety and I slept that day and felt better. But since then I am getting maybe 3 hours total and that is completely broken up. I can't seem to stay asleep for more than an hour at a time and it is taking it's toll.

I was on Mirena for a while after having my daughter 2 years ago, and I had that removed on the 16th and started Nuvaring that I will be using continuously for 4 weeks. I have done Nuvaring in the past and loved it. Never knew about my PMDD though. SSRI's do not work well for me. Not just because of my autism but I have a bad past of DV where medications were used against me so it is a tough mental game. I tried Zoloft and Lexapro last year for my base anxiety and omg it was hell. I don't think I could mentally do it again.

I feel like this is forever. I just want to sleep and feel better. Last week was my crying fits, those have calmed down. I am supposed to start my "period" today. I say it that way because of mirena stopping my bleeding but not the hormonal ride. My anxiety is so high but I don't realize it until I am trying to sleep. I have done the supplements, no caffeine now for 2 weeks, working on staying hydrated.

Will this end? I am really struggling with knowing that I will come out of this. It's been almost an entire 2 weeks. I am so depressed and exhausted but I can't sleep and eating is so difficult.

If my cycle goes to plan, I’m 7 days away from my period - oh boy can I tell by my unrecognisable face :D

Contexte : Je suis nouveau sur le sub, et principalement là pour essayer d'accompagner ma compagne du mieux que je peux. Et pour moi aussi, je suppose.

Bref, ce matin, j'ai ouvert un post (A propos du protocole PERT, en l'occurrence), dont OP donnait justement un lien vers la définition du protocole.

J'ai ouvert le lien...et je vais être honnête j'ai fermé tout de suite, pour deux raisons :

- Angoisse instantané. Trop d'info. C'est super que ça existe pour les personnes qui ont justement besoin de ce niveau de détail, mais pour moi, c'est trop, actuellement

- J'ai juste pas le niveau technique. Je ne suis pas natif anglophone, et bien que merci à l'IA, ça reste du vocabulaire médical. Déjà que j'aurais dû mal à comprendre pour moi, alors pour un organe que je n'ai pas... C'est pas parceque c'est traduit que c'est beaucoup plus clair, du coup 🤣

------

Quelqu'un saurait me renseigner pour deux choses svp?

- Un lien vers le wiki ou autre un peu plus accessible? Par exemple, une sorte de dictionnaire pour juste me familiariser avec le vocabulaire utilisé sur ce sub? J'étais clairement pas prêt a ce que j'ai ouvert ce matin mdr

Et j'ai pas envie de réitérer l'expérience tout de suite par moi-même, malgré la règle N°1 du sub 😅

- Des recommandations pour les "gens comme moi"? Je veux dire, si je suis ici, c'est évidement parce que tout n'est pas rose. Pour ma partenaire, en premier lieu, évidemment. Mais aussi pour moi. J'ai sûrement autant besoin de comprendre par quoi elle passe, que de comprendre par quoi je passe aussi. ( Et oui, j'ai déjà mon prochain rdv psy de programmé mdr, si jamais 😂)

Vous connaissez des sub dédiés aux partenaires? Dans la même idée que r/ADHD et r/ADHD_partner (En moins dépressif que ADHD_partner, si possible mdr. Je déconseille ce sub a toute personne qui n'est pas suffisamment bien dans sa peau et son couple 😅). Et si oui, est-ce que vous pensez que c'est une bonne idée de le rejoindre ( cf mon vécu sur r/ADHD_partner ci-dessus, j'ai compris la lesson lol)?

Typiquement, si le "partner rent" est banni de r/PMDD pour des raisons évidentes, alors il existe un sub où il est sûrement implicitement encouragé. J'ai pas envie de tomber sur ce genre de sub par mégarde, justement. Pas aujourd'hui, en tout cas 😁

I’m mid-20s, diagnosed a year ago. I’ve worked a lot of different jobs before my PMDD kicked in. I eventually want a career, but while I’m still figuring that out, I’m weighing switching from my current office job in medical administration but I don’t know how accommodating other jobs are to this disorder. I’m wondering if folks could tell me about how it’s manageable with their job. What are the pros and cons of your type of work wrt PMDD?

My office job is great insofar as:
• I can plan ahead a little bit and grind harder on certain days so that I can take things at a slower pace during luteal.
• it’s a small company with minimal meetings and supervision as long as I complete everything on time, so I can isolate myself on days where socialization feels unbearable.
• I make enough to pay my bills at 4 days per week.

The drawbacks are
• grueling rush hour driving commute, which can trigger my anger easily
• the big one: sitting all day gives me no inertia. 8 hours at the desk + 2 hours in the car + 3 weekly therapy sessions means I barely move all day. I sometimes feel more exhausted by this than when I was on my feet in food service. Its hard to suddenly work up the energy to hit the gym after work and it reinforces the depressive cycle.
• being self-paced and distraction-less gives me lots of time to ruminate on negative thoughts and spiral out at work

So what does your PMDD/work relationship look like? Is any of this relatable? Do you have accommodations? What do you like/dislike about it? Is the grass just looking greener to me right now?

So I've been sick the last couple of days, initially I thought it was just a cold, but it has turned into tonsillitis. Haven't been this sick since I don't know when - high fever (which I never get) and extreme pain in my throat and whole neck and jaws. Sigh. 🫩 On top of this I have to take care of my twins, one of which also got sick. The other one runs around mad and sad because "nobody wants to play with her". I'm like sweetie it's just that we all are kinda dying rn. Yeah because the other fun thing is that my husband also got sick with tonsillitis, and then it was like I don't get to be sick anymore because now I feel I have to take care of him as well. Not because he is that type of man who whines and demands it, just because you know... I'm a decent person..?

And to top it all off I am obviously so deep in luteal - my period is expected like tomorrow, but perhaps the sickness will prolong luteal hell week due to stress and shit.. 🫠 I'm literally holding on by a thread rn, send help lol. Ok ranty rant over. 🥲

Hello everyone, unfortunately I have some bittersweet news...I did a little experiment this cycle and consumed 0 caffeine (I still ate chocolate). IT HELPED 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 my luteal symptoms were WAY less severe and when my period came I was like "oh no way! My period started!" instead of my usual "THANK GOD THE END IS IN SIGHT."

I was not consuming a crazy amount of caffeine before. 50-150mg per day, probably. And never any past 3pm. I really miss drinking black and green tea, so I might give it a try during follicular, and then stick to herbal again in luteal.

I also took a vacation and have been taking steps to intentionally reduce my stress levels. I'm sure those things influenced my symptoms as well.

Hi All! Curious as to how you all manage the luteal back pain from hell.. this months has been extra terrible.. I also had gotten shingles back in May on the left side of my back and had soo many back issues im just so over it

I’ve done and mri which came back clean so I’m really thinking this is residual healing/ swelling from the hormone fluctuations from my PMDD and still healing from shingles

Curious also if anyone was able to conceive and had this? Did the pain go away during pregnancy?

Multiple docs have recommend that I start taking it, but I’m terrified. Has anyone had a good experience with it?

My girlfriend and I have been together since January of this year.

For the first 6 months, things were amazing. We were extremely close, talked constantly, were very affectionate, and both seemed very sure about our future.

We talked about marriage, living together, meeting her family, our future home, and even children. She used to tell me I was her soulmate and that she wished she had met me earlier.

Looking back, she did seem more down or anxious before her periods, but neither of us knew about PMDD at the time.

Around month 6, she connected her symptoms to PMDD herself. She became really upset about it, and not long after that her outlook on our relationship changed a lot.

She started worrying about whether she could handle a long-term relationship, feeling guilty that she might hurt me, and saying maybe she should remain alone. She also told me that although we weren't breaking up, I should prepare myself for the possibility that our relationship might not last.

We are still together and she still tells me she loves me, but things are very different now.

We talk much less, conversations are shorter, there is much less intimacy and affection, and she seems tired almost all the time. We still go on dates and kiss, but the closeness we had has dropped dramatically.

What confuses me is that this distance often continues even after her period, when I thought she would feel more like herself again.

We also barely talk about the future anymore. She has even gone from being able to imagine having children with me to saying she doesn't think she wants children at all.

I know the honeymoon phase naturally settles down, but this change felt very sudden.
Also she just started Prosac 20MG 1 month ago.
She says that she not feeling drastically different on it and she is not sure if its that effective.

Has anyone else experienced this after their partner realized they had PMDD?

Did your partner suddenly become afraid of marriage, relationships, children or the future?

Did guilt make them pull away ?

And did the relationship ever become close again once PMDD was better understood or treated?

I love her and want to support her, but I also really miss how close we used to be.

Any advise or point of view will be much appreciated.

Finally, after years of waiting, the American Society of Hematology (ASH) has published its first guidelines focused on diagnosing iron deficiency. There are some important changes, particularly for people who menstruate, pregnant individuals, and adults with anemia of inflammation.

One of the biggest takeaways is the importance of looking at ferritin, not just serum iron, when assessing iron deficiency.

Think of serum iron as your checking account and ferritin as your savings account. Serum iron reflects the iron circulating in your blood at the time of the test; ferritin gives us an indication of the iron stored in the body. You can have a seemingly normal serum iron result while your iron stores are depleted i.e., you’re living paycheck to paycheck.

So what ferritin levels does the new guideline recommend?
• Young children (9 months to 4 years): Ferritin ≤20 ng/mL is suggested as the threshold for iron deficiency.
• Adults who are not menstruating or pregnant: Ferritin ≤30 ng/mL is suggested, rather than the older, lower cutoff of ≤15 ng/mL.
• People who menstruate: Ferritin ≤30 ng/mL is suggested.
• For those with symptoms, heavy menstrual bleeding, other risk factors, or certain upcoming life events, a threshold of ≤50 ng/mL may be appropriate.
• Pregnant individuals: Ferritin ≤30 ng/mL is suggested. For pregnant individuals with anemia, a threshold of ≤50 ng/mL may be appropriate.
• Adults with anemia of inflammation: ASH recommends checking both ferritin and transferrin saturation (TSAT), rather than relying on ferritin alone. A TSAT below 20% or ferritin below 100 ng/mL may support a diagnosis of iron deficiency in this context. (This applies to those of you that have inflammatory diseases.)

Keep in mind that a lab’s reference range is not necessarily the same thing as a clinical decision threshold. ASH encourages laboratories to consider flagging results using clinically meaningful thresholds, rather than relying exclusively on their existing reference ranges.

What does this have to do with PMDD?

Iron deficiency can cause symptoms that overlap with some of the symptoms people experience with PMDD, including fatigue, difficulty concentrating, and headaches.

Over the years, we’ve had people post on this subreddit with stories along the lines of, “Turns out it wasn’t PMDD after all” Once they got their levels up their symptoms went away. For others, iron deficiency is comorbid with PMDD and for these folks their symptoms feel 13/10 when they are deficient.

Full guideline here.

Edit: fixed the bottom link

Hey all. 33F. I know this sub is mostly for PMDD, which I have, but wanted to talk about the weird shit I experience during ovulation that is new in the past year. Both my PMDD and ovulation days keep getting worse and worse. It's like I have 1 good week now.

Weird new ovulation stuff:

• Appetite is zero. It's like my stomach and pelvic area is so swollen, that I can't get food down without immediately feeling full. (And in luteal, I am voracious.)
• Hard to pee. It comes out so slowly, and I have to strain. Again, because it feels so swollen in that area, that I imagine my urethra is cramped and urine can't flow as fast? It's creepy af.
• Nausea. Mostly because when I eat, it feels like too much. But generally just nauseous at this time.
• Extreme exhaustion for one day. Then extreme sadness for one day. Most of follicular I feel confident and sexy. But then I get this big wave of tired, followed by extreme misery. I am imagining my body in mourning over the fact that I didn't get it pregnant.
• Can't sleep. Tired all day, but then 11PM rolls around and I am wide awake.
• Occasionally, insane nerve pain in my back. When I get it, it's right before ovulation, and it radiates up to my neck and down my arm and back.

Just wonder if it just be like this.

I hate how bitter Pmdd makes me. I am so bitter about everything, so insecure, so jealous, so angry. And I project that on to my boyfriend. I’m currently on day 21 and I’m struggling so much. I don’t know how anyone would wanna be with me when I’m like this every single month. I wouldn’t want to be with me. I can’t take SSRI’s due to side effects. I feel trapped in this nightmare. Just wanted to vent to people who get it because this is the hardest thing ever and it’s only getting worse as I get older (35F)

Does anyone else have an issue with changing perspective?

I've been in therapy since may. I'm diagnosed bipolar 2 and CPTSD and adhd. The first few months of my sessions were just learning coping techniques and rationalization concepts, then eventually we got into chatting about my daily routines and work life.

I recognized a pattern of evolving feelings. One week during our session, I view things with empathy. The car driving infront of me slowly might have a bad wheel or maybe the driver is scared, but the same slow car a week later will make me irate and hate that person.

It's like one week we are learning techniques about empathy as if it's foreign to me, then 4 days later when I'm not seeing her- I have the positive view point again.

It's like I'm receiving therapy for two different people. I can say a ton of positive things about circumstances one week, then two weeks later have a polar opposite view under the identical circumstances..

Background information I've been medicated for bipolar since 2019, not on birth control. My bi polar meds are working because when I stopped I was absolutely insane. My 'mania' now is just a week long of happiness and clarity and focus.

Currently at Walt Disney World in Florida during my PMDD window, and I have been through the freaking ringer. Aches, bouts of sadness- currently alone in the room because I feel super tired and the thought of walking to the bus to go to Magic Kingdom sounds like a death march.

My family is enjoying rides and attractions, and I’m fighting for calm 😑 I’m 31f, and I have ADHD, and I’m autistic, so I’m kinda just screwed I guess.

If anyone has any advice, it would be really appreciated ;-;

I (34F) have struggled with PMDD since I was a teenager. About a month ago I started on sertraline and it really helped with my overall mood for the first 3 weeks. However, then came the days before my period, and the combination of knowing that another cycle wasn’t successful plus PMDD had been brutal.

My doctor has advised me to up my dosage of anti depressants to help with the Luteal phase going forward. But I want to know how else I can cope with the sadness of seeing another negative, while my brain is already telling me there’s no hope. I’m also early in my TTC journey (4 months) and although everyone tells me it takes time, I feel like my mind isn’t cut out for the not knowing and hope and disappointment.

I have enough doom and gloom in my head, so would appreciate only hearing hopeful and helpful stories please! Thank you and love to anyone experiencing the same x

Helloooo i was without my Prozac over a week, which went into hell week earlier this month and broke up with my boyfriend in a luteal rage. I have since gotten my period (today is my last day). And when i say broke up, i mean we lived together and i actually packed all of his things and made him move out. Literally once i started my period i realized what i had done (also remembered to finally take my Prozac) and i have been so depressed and disgusted with what i did. Every day has been so hard to cope. We had our ups and downs but my actions were 100% not justified. Like i know i really, really fucked up. I'm taking this as a sign i need to work on myself, but i don't even know where to start. I kept hitting a wall with therapy (over many years of trying) so please don't suggest that. Has anyone made a horrible mistake like this? Idk what to do: (

I had a baby and my left hip and leg got messed up postpartum. I pushed through, hard, for a year. Then I got injured and took three weeks off, and now I need physical therapy before I can run again.

I haven't run in over three months. It has been my longest ally. Always there for me. I have ADHD and I'm on the spectrum and it is the way in which I process the world. I can't lift heavy because of my injury. I can do dead bugs and wall sits. That's it. Walking isn't the same. I try though.

I've lost my way to feel okay. Even for a little bit. I've lost my body belonging to me...again. I've lost my identity as an athlete. I've lost my stress release, my me time, the way I connect with the world.

And I just keep hurting and getting darker and deeper.

Physical therapy has taken so, so, so long to set up. I finally got an appointment for a month from now.

I have kids and a baby and my husband works all the time, and I am in legal school. Getting to and from appointments is a nightmare, finding childcare, everything. I have a blood draw to check my hormones....but like, I don't want to go so we can maybe know something new, maybe not. I caught covid from the hospital where I fought to get a referral for Physical therapy.

I did the SSRI's, the SNRIS parade in the past. I can't do that again. A part of me wants to at least try ADHD treatment, but I don't have any fight left. I just don't.

Something feels so very wrong with me. I've been so dark and so down for so long. I went through back to back pregnancies and extended breastfeeding, eating disorders, and alcoholism, then cancer and chemo, then pregnancy again, and I just...I just want myself back. I want me. I want the body that feels familiar.

I'm so sad. I'm so hopeless.

I cry most of everyday, and have for months and months. I want to just run again and say fuck my injury because inside hurts so much more. But part of me has a tiny bit of hope I can get better in my body, which I need so much to handle anything with life.

My husband tells me he's worried because he knows how dark i can get, but I have been here for so long.

Exercise is all we fucking have. It was what kept me going. It's the baseline of treatment. And I can't. My body feels foreign and it makes me want to constantly crawl out of my skin.

I don't know how to fight anymore. I've been laying in the mud, trying so hard to accept everything. But things just keep getting worse. Not better.

Hey everybody!

I’m currently trying the PERT protocol for my PMDD symptoms - while I’m not in perimenopause yet (I think lol). I’m 28 years old and had been on the bc pill Yasmin and continuous fluoxetine 20mg prior to the PERT protocol. Unfortunately it didn’t help me and I developed terrible symptoms regardless (when I didn’t take bc breaks I felt like being in constant luteal after 2 or 3 blisters. but when I took breaks, I still had my background cyclical hormonal activity and terrible PMDD and pms symptoms before “menstruation” and the bc break). So I was begging my gyn to put me on estrogen patches and the oral micronized progesterone. Unfortunately she doesn’t know a lot about PMDD and treatment options and even the specialized PMDD clinic couldn’t help me with further treatment recommendations.

So in the end she prescribed me what I asked her for, even though she didn’t like that idea at all. She started prescribing me the 50 micrograms estramon patches, but I was afraid I might ovulate again with a dosage that low, so I started right away after stopping my bc pill and simply put on 2 patches instead of one to get to 100 micrograms. I started bleeding from stopping the Yasmin pill and whatever progesterone type was inside it, but had no physical symptoms at all. Just looked into my underwear and was like “oh blood”. Never had that before, but it was interesting to see how some other lucky people might experience their periods being completely pain free.

After a short time I asked my gyn to prescribe me the 100 micrograms estrogen patches instead (she thought I started with the 50, so she said we will have to see if I can tolerate that high dosage and in case I get too much migraines we might have to reduce it again, but ended up prescribing me the 100 micrograms thankfully).

My migraines are actually better on the patches than on the Yasmin pill. The blood clot risk profile is also way better under HRT than the Yasmin pill. The first few weeks after switching to HRT I still got different forms of discharge (like during a normal cycle) but after a while it has now turned to fully being egg-white discharge (and a lot of it). It looks like the discharge right before ovulation, just more of it. No smell or color, just looking like I’m literally discharging the white of one egg each time I’m sitting on the toilet.

I’ve also experienced weight gain (I was always severely underweight and have struggled to gain weight and now I actually get a bit of “curves” and look fuller!), I’m not sure if that’s just temporary water retention, but I’m really happy about it.

I’m more constipated and bloated than usual, but I regularly had fatty and soft stool before, looking like I wasn’t absorbing my nutrients properly. Now with the light constipation, that’s actually also a plus for me. It seems like my body has more time to digest and absorb what it needs!

The most important part: my PMDD symptoms are so much better. My adhd symptoms are a lot better and my meds seem to work better. I reduced my fluoxetine to 10mg (might even be able to do without it now regarding the PMDD, but it’s also helpful for anxiety).

Estrogen patches seem to be a life saver for me. But now I’m afraid of too much growth of my endometrium. Since I’m having that much discharge it looks a bit scary to me. I’m now on day 41 of my estramon patches and haven’t started and tried the oral progesterone yet. I’m afraid it will trigger a terribly strong period once I take it according to the PERT protocol and my PMDD symptoms might come back with full force. On the other hand I’m afraid I might develop cancer if I take the estrogen patch alone for too long and the full 90 days.

I’m not sure if the risk is different for me since I’m not in perimenopause yet and if the growth might be stronger/quicker under too much estrogen without progesterone? I don’t see any negative side effects for me apart from the discharge, since the other stuff is actually a good effect for me. Anyone else with similar side effects? Should I schedule and pay out of pocket for more regular Pap smears and maybe measurements of the thickness of my endometrium for preventative safety?

They took me off Yaz which absolutely worked and made me feel amazing. I could actually work for a week and then they said it's too dangerous due to blood clots in my family and other things. I am also overweight so they said it's for the best to put me on Cerelle, which does not help at all.

On Monday I'm gonna start my third box of Cerelle, yet I haven't seen any improvement. Quite the opposite actually. I don't know if I'm depressed but nothing makes me happy anymore, I'm unable to sleep, work and properly live. I have had thoughts about wanting to be dead and ending my life but I've never actually been to the point that I would do anything to myself no matter how much I would want to. Me and my partner argue a lot lately because everything pisses me off. It feels absolutely awful dealing with this and it always feels like it will never end.