r/Fauxmoi • u/Ok_Wolfie_11 • 6h ago
BREAKUPS/MAKEUPS/KNOCKUPS Hilary Swank on having children later or life: “There’s a lot of backlash women get for having children older but not men which is interesting”
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u/Spicyninja 5h ago
Does she not know how to read then, because Al Pacino shouldn't be having kids when he's older than dirt
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u/ElectronicAd5847 5h ago edited 5h ago
When did she say it was right for Al Pacino to be having kids in his 80s when he clearly can't even care for himself fully. She's healthy, active, and obviously participating actively in raising her children. Your comment doesn't make any sense. The point is that celebrity men have kids in their late 40s and 50s all the time and nobody bats an eye.
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u/Spicyninja 5h ago
She specifically mentioned men don't get backlash, but they do. My dad was 60 when I was born, it's selfish AF
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u/ElectronicAd5847 5h ago
Then the appropriate comparison would be the reaction to a 52 year old man having a kid. With celebrities that's a non-story. Happens all the time. The reason this is a controversy at all is because she's a woman. That's the point she's making. It's incredibly obtuse and disingenuous to compare a 52 year old woman to a man in his 80s.
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u/QueenBoleyn 4h ago
No the reason there’s controversy is because she’s FIFTY TWO. We have the same energy when men do it too. It’s extremely irresponsible and unfair to the kid.
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u/JenningsWigService secretly gay and the son of fidel castro 55m ago
The older men who do this are like sperm donors who provide an inheritance. Their kids usually have a much younger mother. Pacino's baby's mother was 30 when she had that kid. Swank and her husband are both in their 50s.
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u/Some_Lack_3448 2h ago
No we don’t, 90% of celebrity men have kids past age 40
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u/QueenBoleyn 2h ago
I’d love a source for that
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u/Some_Lack_3448 2h ago
Search up male popular directors and actors, memorise their birthdate and then look and see when their first child was born xx
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u/SaltBeefin I woke up too soon ago 4h ago
This is where media literacy comes into play and this epidemic of having to make a million disclaimers to cover every what, whataboutism, every possible scenario is a plight on critical thinking.
You as the child of older parents and the people around you will be able to understand and provide "backlash" as you see fit. Some male stars may receive selective backlash but the fact you used Al Pacino as your initial example, the irony writes itself.
The poster guy you used to highlight this "it's both ways" situation is an 80 year old man. Women are getting this shit as soon as they hit 30. They even have a term for women who have a pregnancy after 35, it's called a geriatric pregnancy despite having 15~ years left on average before menopause.
Please don't come here with you projection and your 80 year old man to claim men get it.
Men get splashed with it. Women get it in tsunamis. And that was the point. How much more dumbed down did you want her to say it?
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u/ohnobobobo 10m ago
The current term is 'advanced maternal age'. But also while there's lots of sexism, currently and historically, ' geriatric pregnancy' was not a term created specifically to slag on women 35 and older. It's not like her husband would have been seen as a young stud. There were both geriatric because, when that term was created, people in their late 30s/early 40s were more likely to be grandparents than parents - especially pre fertility treatments.
The conceptions of what is 'old' and 'young' has changed, and so has the term. But it is to notate medical risks associated with pregnancy in that age range (not just for doctors to dig at oldheads).
'Advanced paternal age' is also finding increasing usage, to denote risks associated when the dad is over 40.
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u/BrahminMilkshake 3h ago edited 2h ago
To add to this he's been rumored to be borderline senile for at least a decade. I think the woman who had sex with him was committing elder abuse if that's true. It would be like fucking Joe Biden but worse, it's sick.
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u/Messypotatoe 5h ago
Jon Hamm is going to have his first child at 55 and no one is batting their eyes on his age
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u/ohnobobobo 5h ago
https://www.reddit.com/r/Fauxmoi/comments/1vkspym/jon_hamm_and_wife_anna_osceola_expecting_first/
Top comment on that thread was, "Isn't he like 57?"
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u/Significant_Shoe_17 Fuck her and the Goebbel's limp dick she rode in on 5h ago
Oh they definitely are
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u/No_Guarantee505 5h ago
Where is this idea coming from that no one has a problem with that? On this very subreddit there was heaps of (justified) criticism about his age https://www.reddit.com/r/Fauxmoi/s/1ManhcysXp
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u/Fun_Air_7780 5h ago
OMG when his wife’s pregnancy announcement came out no one was like “OMG that’s adorable! I’m so happy for him!!!” The snarky responses were actually some of the nicer ones.
People are straight up bullshitting to fit their own wishful narrative.
And Jon Hamm isn’t at increased of dying in childbirth, nor does he already have two……..
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u/ProperBingtownLady i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 4h ago
I see that people are trying to disapprove your point but he’s getting nowhere near the same energy that women his age do.
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u/Youwontbreakmysoul 5h ago
I personally think that as long as the mother is healthy and capable- we should allow women to do what they want with their bodies. Including have children. Telling a woman she’s too old or too this or too that (as if you’re her medical provider) is really condescending, and reads as control.
And putting in stories of ‘my parents had me when they were xyz age and that’s why I’m against having kids at that particular age’ is also like…ok then don’t have kids? And just because you have or had a bad experience doesn’t mean the next person (and THEIR children I cannot stress enough) will.
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u/ornerygecko 5h ago
She's healthy at 52, but what about 62? She's not on death's door but who knows what issues will be climbing out of the woodwork then? With a ten year old. And what if that 10 year old isn't healthy?
She has money, but it's not completely fair to the kid.
(I question the father's actions just as much, incase someone tries to pancake waffle me.)
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u/Youwontbreakmysoul 5h ago
Having children is an inherently selfish act and honestly people can die at any time. Including parents. Saying someone who is otherwise healthy and to our knowledge, has no health problems is frankly- ridiculous. And it comes off as policing someone else’s body and life. Everyone is pro-choice until someone makes a decision YOU personally wouldn’t make as if any of us are in the equation when that child was being conceived. Leave mothers- older, younger, disabled and otherwise- alone.
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u/ornerygecko 5h ago
My opinion has no effect on other women's choices. I can't police them. And I would never vote in favor or anything that effects that choice.
Yet, I can still think it's not fair to the kid.
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u/purrrasf 5h ago
I agree with you. Like, of course freak accidents and sudden health scares can happen in younger people (people like to say “well a 35 year old parent could get hit by a train! being old doesn’t matter!”) but we have to be realistic about aging and elderly parents, and the much higher likelihood of health issues increasing and mortality as those parents age.
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u/Significant_Shoe_17 Fuck her and the Goebbel's limp dick she rode in on 5h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/n4oKYFlAcv2AU
She can do what she wants; just understand that the risks are higher, not just during pregnancy, but the risk of developing health issues and passing when your kids are younger. They may not become hands on caregivers, but they will feel the emotional toll all the same. Said as someone who had a parent get cancer at a young age and someone managing an aging parent in their 30s.19
u/purrrasf 5h ago
Exactly right and I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with that too ❤️💔 people dismissing our experiences really need to listen. The experiences of the children matter.
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u/jkraige 3h ago
I had two friends in college whose parents had them in their 40s, and both had a bit of a complex about their parents dying. And actually, one of their dads passed a few years ago, when he was like 28 or something, and the other friend's dad wasn't doing so well either. Everyone's experience is different, but I thought it was interesting they were so concerned when I'd never thought about that with my parents, who tbf if anything had me too young
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u/Sakarilila when I cry I wipe my eyes with my medal 4h ago
If we police who can have kids, where is the line drawn? Because in my opinion its selfish for a couple to have a child if they can't afford (or handle) a disabled child. Last I checked most parents don't even consider that. But the reality is, placing restrictions on who can/can't have kids leads to things like controlling women, eugenics, classism, etc...
Its selfish to bring a kid into the world regardless of age, yet I would never tell a woman she can't have a child. Anything can happen at any moment to any person.
Signed, someone who had an older father who died when they were young.
P.S. I was born disabled, guess how well that went.
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u/ErikasPrisonGlam 5h ago
Thank you, she can do what she wants but the child is who people forget about
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u/ornerygecko 5h ago
That's really who I care about here.
People keep talking about the mom. I care about the kid and feel some consideration should be shown toward them.
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u/CamelAfternoon 5h ago edited 3h ago
So anyone with a health condition is ineligible to have children?
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u/ornerygecko 5h ago
Depends on the condition. Any early signs of dementia or alzheimers? No, they probably shouldn't be getting pregnant.
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u/CamelAfternoon 3h ago
Okay but being a healthy 52 year old is not the same as having early dementia.
I don’t understand why age is a disqualifier but diabetes, smoking, or obesity is not. There is no consistency being applied here. It’s just ageism and judgyness.
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u/ruinedworldtour Thorgy Thor was right 4h ago
My mother just turned 66 and I CANNOT imagine me being 14 now… granted we don’t have Hilary Swank money either so I’m sure her 66 will by very different to my mothers 66! (She’s actually quite healthy and capable, but she gets tired a lot quicker than she used to)
On the other hand I know a 62 year old man who just knocked up someone and his whole family is DISGUSTED
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u/Glittering_knave 27m ago
She will die earlier in her kids' lives than she would have if she were younger. That's just a fact. My dad died in his twenties. I know that young parents die, too. I also can do math, and know that she will have 20 years less time with this kid than she would with a kid that she had in her thirties.
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u/Lawlzstomp 4h ago
A consideration to add is the raised risks that a geriatric pregnancy poses for the child. Older-aged men having kids also carry extra risks for the child.
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u/Inevitable-Brick1809 4h ago
I mean, I agree with the sentiment that "we should allow" people to do what they want with their bodies...but also don't think I'm on board with the caveat of "as long as they are healthy and able". What does that mean? Where is the line here? (These are rhetorical questions)
Shouldn't people have autonomy over their bodies and choices regardless of their health and ability. It seems like a slippery and frankly scary slope to start excluding people based on that. Disabled people have children all the time too. Non-disabled parents become disabled all the time as well.
I don't know if my comment is really adding any value but I just find this line of thinking a bit concerning!
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u/steph314 5h ago
Agree. To everyone's own life, their experience is what matters. But their experience is not everyone's experience or the end all be all and people forget that.
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u/Bloodthirsty_Kirby feeding cocaine to raccoons 5h ago
Thank you!!!! let women do what they want with their bodies! Ageism is disgusting rn, especially with women. She's healthy, she's aware, she's ready. If she lives to 80-90 the child will be 35-45 and that's still longer than a lot of people have a parent. Genuinely people need to stop acting like anyone over 40 is on their death bed. It's gross.
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u/Youwontbreakmysoul 5h ago
Exactly what I’m saying. Women can’t do anything apparently and people project their own awful experiences onto everyone else. Like who are you to assume that she hasn’t thought long term about raising their kid as they get older, or death or any of those things? It reads as misogyny disguised as ‘concern’. The reproductive choices of another woman is not up for debate, in my opinion. If you don’t want to have a baby at 50, then don’t have a baby at 50. And saying ‘my mom had me at 50 and I didn’t like it’. Well Hilary Swank- and other older moms are..surprise! Not your moms.
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u/justicecactus 4h ago
Women can't win. We get shamed for having kids too young. We get lectured for having kids too old. If we choose to remain childfree, we are called selfish and get blamed for population decline.
There's like a 2 week window when a woman turns 30 where it's socially acceptable to get pregnant, and I guess that's it for us.
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u/Ms_Briefs 4h ago
Well put. Everybody gave Brigitte Nielsen so much shit and she's still around with her daughter who looks happy and healthy. I don't give a fuck about an older woman having kids at a non-conventional age. She has the means, the love and the support network for it.
I care more about the neglectful or abusive people who should not be parents and that's at ANY age.
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u/Maya_TheB they're perfect for each other (derogatory) 4h ago
If anything, as long as you can carry a child it means you are not too old be a mother. Nature is simple to understand sometimes, you are fertile until you aren't, it's that easy.
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u/jkraige 3h ago
Eh. I just had a baby. I thought nature would have a lot more to do with it, but even breastfeeding is incredibly hard even though everyone gives you the impression it's super natural and nature will naturally lead the way, but in reality I had to be taught how to feed my baby. If anything, it all feels very unnatural, and we don't even know how much science, if any, she needed to conceive in the first place
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u/redandbluecandles 5h ago edited 5h ago
I feel like my own experiences make me side eye anyone having kids at 50+ no matter the gender. I'm a child of older parents and the stress of being a young adult trying to get my footing in life combined with having to deal with my parents having more and more health issues just gets to me. The fact that my parents might not live to see me have kids and that I'll lose them sooner that my friends will lose their parents upsets me so much. I feel like my own anxiety and fears with having older parents makes me unable to look at these situations without bias breaking through.
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u/Meccha_me_2 5h ago
Yep. The other people here are kind of missing the point. It sucks for the kids to know they will have yo watch their parents deteriorate and lose their parents much earlier in life. A lot of people come back and say “but you can lose your parents at any moment to illness or an accident.” Yep but they have no control over those things. On the other hand, you can certainly choose to not have children at 50
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u/zugunru 5h ago
Yeah, anyone saying “but you can lose a parent at aNy AgE” is missing the point that by having a kid when you’re in your 50s, you are GUARANTEEING that they’ll have to deal with your health issues while they navigate being a young adult. It’s selfish, whether you’re the father or the mother.
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u/kilowatkins 5h ago
My brother and I are 15 years apart and I get sad sometimes thinking about how much more time he will have with our parents than I will. They were in a better place emotionally and career wise with me. But my brothers kids got a lot more physically able grandparents than mine will. It's complicated for sure.
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u/elfinglamour 4h ago
My parents are about 10 years older than most of my friends parents, which might not sound like a lot but in regards to health issues and aging the differences between 65 and 75 are actually quite pronounced.
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u/Swimming-Ad5544 4h ago
I feel like I have similar issues with my parents, but I don’t resent them for it. That’s just how it ended up for them
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u/redandbluecandles 4h ago edited 4h ago
I don't resent my parents at all. I'm just very scared to lose them and hate that this is the situation we are in. They are the best parents and I just want to have so much more time with them than I know I'll have. I don't judge people for having kids older but for the kids it can be a stressful thing and I think that needs to be acknowledged and older parents should prepare for that.
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u/switchbladefightz 5h ago
I guess it's becauss when a man has a child at an older age, the mother is usually wayyyy younger, but an older mother is typically going to have a similarly aged coparent. I don't know whether it's exactly fair to criticise older mothers, but I think it comes from a place where we're thinking about that child losing both of their parents in young adulthood, rather than just a father in the case of older fathers. But I don't know!
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u/ElectronicAd5847 5h ago
People are also extremely weird when older women have kids with younger men though
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u/Culinary_Fruit_Salad call me gal gadot cuz idk how to act rn 5h ago
i wonder if that's because men aren't usually primary parents/caregivers so having a young and active dad isn't perceived as as helpful (generally) as having a young mom
(I'm not saying that I agree with this logic. just that it might be what's going on)
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u/Significant_Shoe_17 Fuck her and the Goebbel's limp dick she rode in on 5h ago
I think that goes along with the general aversion to age gaps in relationships
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u/Culinary_Fruit_Salad call me gal gadot cuz idk how to act rn 4h ago edited 4h ago
sorry, I'm having trouble following. you think that what
goodgoes along with the general aversion to age gaps in relationships?2
u/Significant_Shoe_17 Fuck her and the Goebbel's limp dick she rode in on 4h ago
Now I'm confused. I'm saying that the same people generally take issue with both
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u/Culinary_Fruit_Salad call me gal gadot cuz idk how to act rn 4h ago
thank you for explaining!
i accidentally had a very confusing autocorrect mishap where it randomly added "good" when I wanted to say "goes"
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u/pamiskindofabitch 5h ago
To your point, I would argue that it’s not that the men don’t get flack for being older and fathering children. It’s more that they get flack for the entire relationship dynamic, wherein they’re generally dating or married to a woman decades younger.
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5h ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/NeenerNeaner 5h ago
I agree, neither should be having kids at that age. Health risks also increase with older sperm. You're increasing the risk of having children with special needs being taken care of by people closer to death without the youth or energy needed to properly take care of them. Even if the kid is perfectly healthy, they're ultimately more likely to lose their parents young. It's just unfair to the kid.
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u/f4nnypacks Nancy Jo, this is Alexis Neiers calling 5h ago
hm bc i think it sucks when men do it too! my youngest half sibling is 5 (i’m 32). when he’s my age my dad will be 77 years old if he’s still around. it sucks to think about
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u/fliesthroughtheair 5h ago
Ok, what? Being 32 with a 77 year old father seems slightly higher than normal but within incredibly normal bounds, particularly in the next decade or two because people overall are having kids later in life.
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u/Meccha_me_2 5h ago
Meh I’m 32 and my parents are 70 and it really sucks tbh. They’re already showing signs of deteriorating and I don’t feel like I can move where I want at this point
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u/f4nnypacks Nancy Jo, this is Alexis Neiers calling 5h ago
this is my point, like if my parents were at that age right now it would be a burden and depressing! i hope your parents remain in good health <3
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u/aftershockstone 5h ago
Yeah… it sounds pretty normal to me. He had the kid at 45.
My dad had my youngest sister at 41 so he will be 73 when she is 32. He is in his 60s now and still very healthy and plays sports every weekend so we’ll see what the 70s hold for him.
My manager also JUST gave birth to her first (maybe only?) kid… she is 42 and her husband is slightly older.
It does not sound like the end of the world to me to have your children in your mid-40s. Some people get settled in a little later in life (love, career, financial stability, various priorities) and I don’t think it’s particularly shame-worthy. If people are getting married later and later as you said, the average age will get pushed back.
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u/Chlorophyllmatic 3h ago
I’m 28 with a 77 year old father and it directly factors in to where my wife and I are willing to take jobs and what kind of commitment / contract we’ll take simply because he’ll be dependent before long.
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u/AnteKrist 5h ago
Yeah, having a kid at 45, especially when you've already had kids, seems fine? Having a 27 year age gap between kids and teen parenthood gives more of a pause.
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u/f4nnypacks Nancy Jo, this is Alexis Neiers calling 5h ago
there are more siblings between us - the oldest one is 15 (17 year gap). my parents were 19 when i was born and my siblings have a different mom (in her late 30s).
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u/SpooktasticFam 5h ago
My Dad's 70 and still skydives most weekends. He's been doing it for like 50 years tho, so ymmv.
A lot of people lose their parents a lot younger than 32.
I'm mid-30s and still glad my parents are alive. My Mom has hella health problems, and my Dad has been skydiving for 50 years.
I could die from a brain aneurysm tomorrow.
You can live life scared of dying, but you're gonna die either way.
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u/f4nnypacks Nancy Jo, this is Alexis Neiers calling 5h ago
i’m glad your dad is doing well! i didn’t say anything about being scared of dying, just that having aging parents at a relatively young age would make me sad.
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u/Stunning_Hippo1818 4h ago
A lot of people yes, but not most. Having children at an advanced age is a choice, dying in an accident or from sudden health issues is not.
Living life without the same support as someone would have if their parents were younger is harder. Going from becoming an adult to looking after aging parents would be really really hard.
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u/LaTosca 5h ago
What if I think men should get flack for it too
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u/XOTrashKitten 3h ago
It's riskier for the baby too, older men risk autism, adhd, cancer, preeclampsia and diabetes for the mother etc but men can have kids their whole life ig 🤡
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u/purrrasf 5h ago edited 4h ago
Sorry but “my dad was my favorite person and he died when I was a young adult, so I’m going to gladly do that to my new child” is a NUTS statement
And similarly Luke Wilson and Justin Theroux are nuts for the same reason PLUS being creeps with their much younger girlfriends.
And the BIGGEST FUCK Pacino and all of those other even older men who are even worse when their children will know them for what, 5-10 years? I will gladly call out these fucks
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u/MyCatIsLenin 5h ago edited 5h ago
Uh what? I think men get a lot of backlash.
My son is 19, im 45.
Hillary will be 71 when her child is 19. That's 4 years younger than my sons grandma!
Sorry it's selfish. Good for her having kids but it's selfish imo. Im sure she'll be a good mom, but her kids will miss out on a couple decades of knowing their parents as an adult, which is the best part of the relationship from the child's pov I think.
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u/Significant_Shoe_17 Fuck her and the Goebbel's limp dick she rode in on 5h ago
My mom and I have such a great time together now that I'm an adult. Her kids are going to miss out on so much.
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u/Youwontbreakmysoul 5h ago
Having kids period- is a selfish thing to do. You’re not any less selfish than her because you had your kid younger. And comments like this read as telling women when they can and cannot have children. Which is sexist.
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u/frankiestree 5h ago
I feel like there wouldn’t be the same judgement if she was adopting at a later age. I don’t think it suits the patriarchal agenda if women have children later in life. The fear of the ‘biological clock’ has always worked to men’s advantage, with women settling for relationships with men who bring nothing to the table and are horrible fathers
I literally just read a post about a woman who left her baby with her husband to go to an appointment for 4 hours and she came back and the baby was in the play pen crying while he was working out in another room, he said it’s not his job to play with the baby …
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u/SpooktasticFam 5h ago
I love this comment so much I awarded it, but I would ask you to kindly put some more punctuation in your comment
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u/wilsonja2 5h ago
I dk if you have money, nannies, access to the best everything. Having a child over the age of 50 is selfish.
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u/ZhaozhouCongshen 5h ago
Good for her, she obviously still has the energy and drive to raise children at this age.
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u/CostanzaArchitecture 5h ago
*money
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u/ZhaozhouCongshen 5h ago
Money doesn't give birth to the child at 52. I'm the same age as her and my kid is 27. There is no way I'd want to raise another.
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u/pamiskindofabitch 5h ago edited 5h ago
You’re not wrong. But I think money can contribute to how burdened you do and don’t feel. There are things I don’t have the energy for that I would consider doing, if I had the money to offload those burdens, or generally didn’t need to worry about money.
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u/warrantthrowaway2023 5h ago
she won't be raising them. she'll maybe be active up until sometime in elementary school but she won't be able to keep up with a kid's schedule. she'll be 70 when they graduate high school.
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u/firesticks a role model for the next Asian kid that wants to get railed 5h ago
The difference is, she’s not tired from raising a kid for 27 years.
I had kids later than my friends and saw them age way faster, I caught up when I had mine.
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u/Househipposforsale 5h ago
I kind of find it shitty on anyone having kids over 46-men or women. Having to take care of an aging parent in your early 20s,or losing them young, never having active grandparents unless you’re a teen parent
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u/Ordinary-Variety7256 I'll never have first class horniness 49m ago
Agreed. It’s wild to me that many seem to not put much thought into how their actions will statistically likely negatively affect their child.
I’m in my very early forties now and unless I happen to meet my actual future husband in the next 2-3 years (ended an engagement early this year), I will simply not be having a kid. 45 is my personal cutoff too and I have no desire to have a child by donor or whatever (no shade to people who choose that).
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u/Sea-Aide-6648 4h ago
This will get lost but Ive worked with fertility clinics for 12 years as a professional. The genetics dont...genetic at this age. The increase in KNOWN abnormalities in embryo development is so much higher. The kids themselves have a much greater chance of developmental disabilities.
There are some things money cannot fix.
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u/Partywithmeredith I never said that. Paris is my friend. 5h ago
People need to stop having opinions about women’s bodies. Full stop. I’m so happy for her and wish her a healthy pregnancy and easy labour.
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u/throwaway564858 5h ago
Thank you. Crazy how quickly it swings from "a woman's health is between her and her doctor" to... whatever this is
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u/Partywithmeredith I never said that. Paris is my friend. 5h ago
Yup, it’s very “a woman should be able to choose what she does with her body as long as I agree with it!” GTFO.
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u/JardineByNature 4h ago
I don't think that's the case at all. Look at the comments section in any post, video, or story about older men and kids.
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u/splashmob i just had a dream where Walton Goggins lifted me up at a Costco 5h ago
Flaming hot take: I don’t think having kids at her age is selfish. People die at all ages from all kinds of things. She’s extremely wealthy and seems healthy and active, fuck it 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Meccha_me_2 5h ago
Yeah but their children are guaranteed to lose their parents earlier in life. The argument that you can lose your parents at any time is irrelevant because it’s not something anyone has control over, but you certainly CAN choose to not have children at 50. you will probably die in their 30s
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u/purrrasf 5h ago edited 5h ago
People can of course die at any age, but the likelihood of a child born to a 32 year old vs a 52 year old losing decades with their parents is VERY different.
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u/sillydoomcookie 5h ago
Yep. My parents had me in their mid 40s. Yes I lost them in my 30s and it fucking sucks, but my nephews lost their mum when they were kids. There are no guarantees in life. I had amazing parents who were far more chill and stable than when they were younger and I wouldn't change a thing.
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u/pizzaisgoodtho 5h ago
I actually think men get just as much hate. Jon Hamm is the most recent one to come to mind, I saw nothing but negative reactions due to his age.
Personally, it's none of my damn business. I get that having older parents can be hard, but youth does not guarantee that they'll be around for a long time or that they'll even be good parents. These people are stupid rich so their kids will likely have less stress even if they do have to care for aging parents. I have friends with really old parents and some hate it, others don't seem to mind. So yeah. Not my kids, not my parents, not my business.
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u/torrrrlife 5h ago
There’s backlash for men they just don’t give a shit, which is what I recommend to my fellow women. Fuck em do you.
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u/shelfdham 4h ago
This is kinda random but its so good to see drew Barrymore still having pretty much full use of her facial muscles lol, she looks like an actual women in middle age and hasn't got that uncanny valley look
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u/ReadyCauliflower8 4h ago
There's a lot of "men get away with this while women can't" situations that deserve callouts, but I disagree that it's a thing here. I think everyone says the same exact thing when it comes men doing it lol. Robert De Niro, Al Pacino etc were rightfully called out.
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u/OptimistPrime527 damn, she got hereditaried? 4h ago
My parents were older parents. I think my mom was 37 when she had me and my dad was 17 years older than her. It sucks that I lost my dad when I was in my early 20s, however I’m sure he was super happy to be my parent for those 20 years. Add to that, I’m now 40 and I don’t have any children, and studies are coming out to show that women that have babies at my age are actually living longer. 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️
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u/OrdinaryOk5196 5h ago
This because doctors(actual medical professionals) tell us that having a child after 35 comes with risks to mother’s as well as child’s health. And each year older the risks become greater. People give backlash to old men too but for different reasons.
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u/RicciardoRua 4h ago
Im not judging her but as someone who is 29 and whose mother had her at 40 and is currently 69 and health is shit it truly is just not worth it
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u/Ifonliesandjusts 4h ago
Her having children in no way affects my life and I therefore don’t care. Her body, her choice
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u/Corsola_Fan_69 I’ve been noticing gravity since I was young 5h ago
woman has a kid "too young": she's irresponsible, stupid, selfish
woman has a kid "too old": sad, desperate, selfish
woman doesn't have a kid: lonely, in denial, selfish
You really can't win.
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u/2pinkfood2 4h ago
"JLo had kids at 38" - every noncommittal guy I dated in my 20s. my issue is people, men and women, with enough money to have every fertility treatment known to man having children absurdly late in life instills unrealistic expectations in uneducated people. and that becomes a problem that the rest of us have to deal with.
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u/Sad-Decision-8510 Lacks voice or vision. Pedestrian. 4h ago
I am childfree but wish my parents had had me a bit older! They were 24 and 25, one still earning a college degree and the other working retail. I think it would have benefited us all if they’d had me (and my sister, I’m a twin) 7, 8, 9 years later as they would have been financially a lot more stable. However I have been told by people you don’t want to have kids when you’re older bc of health reasons. I asked my mum why she decided to have kids at 24 and she said she’d seen her friends struggle to conceive so thought they’d best start trying. A gamble either way imo
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u/Passiveresistance 5h ago
There’s an element of risk or less than ideal circumstances almost every time someone chooses to get pregnant. Parents too young, parents too old. Single parent. Parents die in a car crash. Parents go broke and end up homeless. Young, healthy, financially secure parents might abuse their children. The country they live in might get bombed.
There’s a million things that can go wrong with pregnancy and parenting. Hillary’s kid could have it a lot worse than having an older, wealthy, for all appearances intelligent and self aware mother. Everyone’s so quick to judge women no matter what we do.
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u/WorksOfEarth 5h ago
I'm too lazy to search for a source but it's been researched that older women don't yield as many birth defects as older men.
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u/Possible_Clerk4186 4h ago
This is not about the subject but I felt jealous when she said she would still rather be born despite whatever.
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u/ApprehensiveStrut 4h ago
If you have the time, money and healthcare resources, more power to you and your children.
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u/darkday15 2h ago
It's not like there's a guarantee that if you have your kids young you'll definitely be around when they're older. People unfortunately die unexpectedly all the time even at a young age. All you can do is cherish the people you love.
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u/Jenanay3466 18m ago
I love that, I’ve never thought of that. My dad died at 39 and had kids at 26. We never know how long we have but we make the best choices that feel right for our lives.
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u/ichii3d 1m ago
To me, this has less to do with being too old to raise children, plenty of grandparents do that, and more to do with fertility and pregnancy risks.
My wife and I became parents in our early 30s, and I was surprised to learn how much age can affect fertility and the chances of complications, particularly as women reach their late 30s.
That doesn’t mean women can’t have healthy pregnancies at that age; many do. But the “biological clock” has a real basis in biology, rather than being purely a cultural expectation.
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u/hanimal16 i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 5h ago
If one has the financial means and security nets in place to have children later in life, more power to them.
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u/ElectronicAd5847 5h ago
She's absolutely right and so many of the reactions to this news prove her point over and over and over again. Also as someone whose parent died when I was 4 it sucks to see people talk as if you can't lose a parent at any age.