I just need to be heard by people that won't judge.

Like a lot of autistic people, I have things that give me brain yucks. Sounds are very hit or miss for me. I can listen to a lot of things people find unpleasant, but others, like a piano being tuned, will straight up give me a migraine.

Tragically, my son's laugh is in the latter category. He's a natural soprano even as a teen, and he is so fucking squeaky when he's happy. And it hurts me on a physical level. It's hard to even be rational, it hurts so bad.

Obviously I love him, and I'm not going to make him stop laughing. I will occasionally ask him to reign it in a bit if it's on the verge of breaking me.

I just wish his joy didn't hurt me.

Hi,
I am an autistic mother 40 yo, my husband is 42 yo. We have a 3 yo son and I am pregnant in week 26+.

My husband doesn’t want to cooperate. I write to him for example a list of things to do when he picks our kid from preschool and he doesn’t do them. Like take the boots from preschool for the weekend, ask the teacher about this or that.

When I take our son for activities I ask my husband to prepare lunch so it’s ready when we are back and he replies “the lunch will be ready when it will be ready”.

I book appointments with a doctor and ask my husband to take the kid there because I myself need to go a lot to the doctors because the pregnancy is very high risk. And my husband says that he will see.

He doesn’t want to plan anything in advance. He doesn’t help with any playdates or being social with other parents.

What can I do? Soon there will be another baby in the house. Any tips how to explain that planning is important?