People here would have an absolute meltdown if they knew I’m in a book club with 9 of my neighbors and we help each other all the time. Getting mail for them, trimming their hedges, I’ve even let them use our pool while out of town. It’s actually awesome that I have an entire street looking out for my kids and dogs, and that I can get the random cup of sugar or stick of butter if needed (which I did Christmas Eve when I burnt the rolls for dinner). It’s sad people are so deeply anti social now.
I try being friendly by at least waving and saying hi when I'm out gardening and see them in the driveway, but since everyone on the street reacts by just staring silently and then walking away, I don't say hi much anymore.
It's really awkward too because it's a quiet little cul-de-sac where every house faces every other house, we can all see and hear each other all the time when we're outdoors.
I really love gardening too, but it's so tense being out there surrounded by people who are studiously ignoring you but you're all painfully aware of each other. I've started timing my gardening sessions around avoiding being outside in the evenings (my favourite gardening time) 'cause everyone's arriving home at that time.
I want the kinda neighbours who invite each other to barbecues, help each other out in little ways...it's understandable if that's a boundary for some and I get the need for being a bit guarded when people are essentially strangers.
Would be lovely to have neighbours that at least wave or nod slightly when you say hi though.
I’m sorry that’s really terrible. I also live in a cul de sac and I feel really lucky. Everyone is vastly different ages but somehow it works. We have grandparents. people in their 40s with kids, older couples without kids, people with teenager…and all of us have different backgrounds, religions, and politics (thankfully we don’t have MAGA because the conservatives are nurses and very feminist -which does break my brain a little). I don’t have any family nearby and it really is nice to feel some sense of community where you spend 90% of your life. I’m sorry.😞
It's all good, it makes me happy to know that idyllic little neighbourhoods like yours exist. And neighbours change; maybe one day some friendly ones will move in.
In the meantime I'll just keep planting trees to bring in little bird and bug friends. lol
Literally we have like 7 group chats going with people in every section of our neighborhood. Mom chats, party chats, whatever. My friends have sent their kids when my door jammed and I didn’t see the notification for hours because I was driving. Lending a steam cleaner because someone’s cat peed. Need some mayo or brown sugar? Head on down. Feel like a cocktail but outta booze? On my way! You have to live near these people. You don’t have to be best friends, but talk to your neighbors ffs.
It should be noted though that none of those things require access to your house and that OP never provided the information on how to access their house even when their neighbor told them what time they could help. If the neighbor wasn't going to help, they wouldn't have said what time they would be home, they would have just said "I'm sorry, I'm not home right now either"
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u/HauntingSherbet7979 5h ago
People here would have an absolute meltdown if they knew I’m in a book club with 9 of my neighbors and we help each other all the time. Getting mail for them, trimming their hedges, I’ve even let them use our pool while out of town. It’s actually awesome that I have an entire street looking out for my kids and dogs, and that I can get the random cup of sugar or stick of butter if needed (which I did Christmas Eve when I burnt the rolls for dinner). It’s sad people are so deeply anti social now.