I work in community mental health, specifically with teens-young adults experiencing homelessness/at risk of homelessness/poverty as well as court mandated clients (who are often experiencing poverty as well). It’s also a very diverse population.
My big struggle here has not been as a white person counseling BIPOC. I feel the education I got as well as the general work I’ve been doing in my personal life to become more educated about issues of race leaves me feeling pretty good about my ability to work with a racially diverse population (with the knowledge I need to constantly pursue more education of course).
The part I was surprised to struggle with when entering this niche is the “live-free-die-young” mentality and the general futility clients in this population feel. There is no future thinking. Even when opportunities do arise for them (for a job, housing, getting their driver’s license/transportation access, etc.) they often let the opportunity pass by, or low distress tolerance makes them “give up” (e.g. I had a client who got a job, but the first day she wore the wrong clothes and was sent home to change. Instead of changing, she just didn’t go back, and lost the job. The thing she did instead was helping a stranger with resources she really didn’t have the means to spare.)
I grew up middle class. There were a few years (lost a biz around 2008) where my parents really struggled and relied on gift cards from their church, but they were always good at hiding the effects of that and I never even found out about it until later, so I never really knew true feelings of financial insecurity. I also always had a pretty high-achieving personality (eldest daughter, lol) and even when I began struggling severely with mental health as a teen/young adult, I pushed myself (probably too much) to “achieve.” I had dreams for the future and worked toward them even when I was severely ill/suicidal/etc.
So this “live-free-die-young” mentality is really foreign to me. This population faces so many real barriers, but there are also so many self inflicted barriers as well. I’ve also seen the “I don’t want to work” issue that leads to the “lazy” stereotypes about those in poverty, but I know it is so so much more than that. I had a client who literally said “my life has been hard enough already, I don’t want to work hard.” Which is so true…but I don’t know how to help in cases like this. I’ve been reading The Broken Ladder which has helped me put words to these phenomena, but treating clients like this is a totally different matter. There are true barriers but also a learned helplessness/lack of drive or ambition that I just cannot understand. (If you want out, take the opportunity to get out when it comes!) We also have a transitional housing/tiny home program to offer people the opportunity for housing stability while they find a job/get on their feet. Most do, but a few of them have this mindset of “I have a couple more years here, I have plenty of time, I’ll figure it out later” (our cap is 24yo). And I have clients who do get jobs who complain about the hours when they’re only working part time and I’m like…how are you going to support yourself if you quit even part time jobs in retail/service industry that are “too hard”? I hope I don’t sound like I lack empathy here. I have so much empathy for these situations/mindsets, I just have no idea what to do about it.
I am working on this in supervision, but it’s more like my supervisor and I are learning together rather than her already having experience with this. (She’s PP.) Has anyone worked with this population or lived this life and have advice? I am so often at a loss on how to help without sounding like a tone deaf pick-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps person.
Edit: would also love resource/book/podcast recs if you have them!
