Overthinking hell

[u/Infamous_Republic876]

Pls pls pls help im desperate for any help!!!

Hello! This is my first ever post on Reddit, and I’m looking for some unbiased advice.

Im in my early 20s now, and I’ve had an issue with overthinking, if im being honest, my whole life. I remember thinking as a small child how i should react to others, always wondering what others thought of me, and wanting to get any type of attention i could get. But it was never labelled as overthinking, i just moved past it because thats what i was told to do. This became a more significant issue when i finished highschool, once i learned what ive been doing this whole time. I just cant stop overthinking. I discovered coming off birth control has massively helped, and the frequency in which i spiral has greatly decreased. The issue is that it is still going on, even though less frequently, the days i do spiral it feels more drawn out, and feels more intense. Like really intense. And i live a good life, just one im not really taking full advantage of.

Ill overthink about all sorts,mostly about myself as a person( very negatively), my relationships with others, and what im supposed to do with life, how i feel quite ambitionless. The list just kind of goes on and on and on and ive considered to go to therapy for it, but im not sure it will help. I feel like any technique i try doesnt work(either because i dont stick to it long enough or because i forget to do it). Im aware that overthinking does not help me at all, and that its protected me from nothing, but i cant help but keep myself in that negative loop. I fear that eventually it will get so bad i’ll actually believe what i tell myself, and ill withdraw even more from the things/people i love. I feel like i cant decide on absolutely anything and im scared im going to turn into a nothing human being. I rely too much emotionally on my boyfriend, and feel very hollow as a person. Tried going down the self help route, but just entered self help hell. Can barely even put into words what im feeling

p.s this post was written in the midst of said spiral

P.p.s ive been told i people please, have gone through some big changes this year which i havent really adjusted to, and i dont think i have much of a relationship with myself, so please any advice is greatly appreciated

P.p.p.s i feel like once i have this figured out, life will become all i want it to be, i just feel so uncertain about everything and feel like i do everything wrong right now. I want to feel calmer, more steady and stable, less racey

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