Trying to understand how pwASPD feel and manage suicidal ideation. Im someone who has anhedonia so I might relate to some experiences here but maybe not.

What was your experience? What emotions do you feel during these periods?

There is a debate ongoing within psychology of whether Psychopathy should remain distinct or be integrated into ASPD. It seems to have two sides:

1. It should remain distinct because Psychopathy is rooted in emotional/interpersonal deficits while ASPD is rooted in observable behavior (Hare).
2. It should be integrated due to significant overlaps the two share in presentation, behavior, and disregard for others (Miller and Lynam).

So what do y'all believe? Should psychopathy be distinct or should it be integrated in future DSMs?

what makes this person different from everyone else?
what do you feel towards them?
how differently do you feel about them than you do with other people? (do your levels of empathy change with them?)

this is a high point of interest for me, i would appreciate anyone answering :)

I’m curious to know other fellow ASPDers’ experiences with intuition.

I have prophantasia and one of the ways I know something isn’t for me is if I “hit a wall” in my head and can’t imagine beyond the situation. This is very hard to explain, but I will try.

Prophantasia is “the ability to project mental imagery into one's physical field of view, rather than just the "mind's eye."” I can normally imagine things in my reality as opposed to just in my head, like a green apple on my table for example. I can see the green apple in all its glory, but I know it’s not actually there, I’m imagining it there. My life is like VR, it’s pretty cool.

Anyway, I noticed that I can’t do that with things that my intuition says ‘no’ to. For example, if my intuition is telling me ‘no’ to a relationship with a specific someone, I find it nearly impossible to imagine them in my head or in my reality. It feels like there’s a translucent wall between me and my imagery of the person. If a certain situation isn’t for me, I can’t imagine myself in it without hitting that translucent wall.

I don’t get a “gut feeling” about things, I never have. I never understood that term or experience. I don’t feel my intuition somatically, I experience it very mentally/cerebrally.

How does intuition manifest for you?

How does self worth and self esteem is interpreted in your brain? Does it feel like sort of a superpower? Do you feel harmed in any way by the knowledge and consequences of being ASPD or this would be the opposite of how someone with ASPD diagnoses feel?

I have been forcefully going to therapy because of drug abuse for a few months but just today,after answering a mountain of questions and papers the last week i was given my diagnosis for anti social personality disorder and possibly narcisistic personality disorder.Im wondering what now? My parents are extremely unpleased with my behaviour not that its a real issue,but what did you all do after your oficial diagnosis?

For context, Me (F19) have bpd, depression and anxiety disorder. My partner (M18) has Aspd, ocd, anxiety and depression diagnosed. We are in a relationship for about 3 years.

Our relationship is very chaotic, me myself id say im a good girlfriend, i go to therapy and take medications, he does aswell.

He keeps lying to me, about everything. We broke up many times because of this, but I cannot let him go.

Today he stopped replying to me, to everyone. Got really drunk and sat somewhere in a park. I kept calling him worried, that he attempted. (My bestfriend of 9 years commited 2 years ago so it is very hard for me) I freaked out and called his mom and the police came etc etc. He is now being taken to the psychward, which he was in before.

He lied to me about having a job, thats where i thought he was today. He keeps lying about not drinking, then drinks alot. He stole money from me and my parents many times.

I cannot take it anymore, we were supposed to move in together in 2 months but his impulsive actions and lying, drinking, manipulating make it hard for me to believe him anything at all.

I love him so so much, i cannot even explain how precious he is to me. He went trough so much abuse and I did aswell (Still in it).

I dont know If i should leave him, would he be better without me? I try to help him with everything, I do everything for him but he doesnt want the help at all.

Please, any advice will be helpful.

Title. Got diagnosed a bit ago. Lots of fuck ups but mostly just searching for things to do that scratch the itch. I heard martial arts are a good way to get started, might look into that but for now I've just been smoking a stupid amount of weed and trying not to throttle someone when I get too worked up. What about y'all?

I imagine a lack of empathy combined with a disregard of what others think results in an iron clad ego. Embarrassment is a byproduct holding someone's negative view of you in high regard, after all. Aside from preventing tangible ramifications (ex. legal trouble), I assume this doesn't happen often.

So, that being said, what does get under your skin? What makes you feel small, inferior, sad--even if it's not in the traditional sense? If and when you perceive yourself negatively, what causes it? What's the thought process? Or does the very concept just not apply to you?

I've been wondering this for a while; is it a common experience for any of you/us to (physically) self-harm as a kind of "harm reduction" when you really, really want to hurt other people or animals or cause other disastrous physical damage?

I started intentionally self-harming around the age of 10, when I kind of pivoted from freely hurting other people and animals to becoming deeply concerned with the effect those actions would have on my reputation and the efficacy of getting what I wanted both short-term and long-term, as well as the deep fear of "getting in trouble" with my abusive father. But I still needed to damage something. It is the #1, primary reason that I started to physically hurt myself. To this day I still feel like a lot of my actual SH or my SH urges are because of my urges to hurt or destroy things externally, which itself stems from boredom/emptiness or anger.

I have a lot of times where I'm so insanely angry or bored or some other unpleasant thing that I just want to lash out on everything, but I know it would be safest and most logical to do it to myself. It would also be acceptable and easy to lie about — "Oh, I was feeling depressed," not "I've been thinking about killing you all." I've had a lot of instances where I've hurt myself and imagined I was damaging someone or something else. When I've described these behaviors and thoughts to providers over my life, they've usually seen it as really atypical and almost never understood it as even being a possibility of why people act out on themselves.

I was wondering if other people in this sub with ASPD had this experience, or anyone in the world. If it helps, for context, I have both ASPD and NPD, so I might be a little bit more concerned with my image than some people with ASPD alone, but honestly not always and not fully. And I still feel like, to this day, I refrain from external harm because, yes, I've kind of grown a moral compass of my own, but also because those actions are genuinely not conductive to my agenda of getting what I want from people. Eager to hear your responses.

I met my boyfriend two months ago, and we’ve been dating for a month. Recently, he told me he has a diagnosis of ASPD, but from the little I know of him, I don't feel like that's the case (though I acknowledge I have no professional background to make such a claim). I mean, my mother thinks he’s "strange," and he’s usually curt in conversations—except with me.

He’s been through a lot and I care about him, so I want to understand him better. Most of the Google searches I’ve done haven't yielded very good results.

Hey, i had this as long as i remember but i was just recently diagnosed so i figured someone here might have a solution to this.

I am filled with anger 24/7 with no outlet. I tried everything, exercise, meditation, rage rooms, stoicism etc. It's not sadness, it's pure fury trigged by literally everything people around me do (stranger or close ones). And it only goes away when i hit/hurt people, it's an instant relief to a perpetual itch. Sometimes i think back on times i've lost control and hit people and it almost feels euphoric. But i can't go around attacking people and lashing out like a rabid dog, not that i feel guilty afterwards but it would be horrible pr not to mention really stupid. Nobody knows about my... issues and i'd like to keep it that way but the sensation of being on the brink of exploding from anger sucks, my gums hurt and my temples ache after a while. How do i keep this under control?

Hi all, first post here. This past year i (22f) was seen by two separate mental health professionals, both said I have ASPD. I always knew I had it, but hearing it confirmed made me realize I am stuck with it forever. there is no pill to magically make me feel normal, or therapy trick that will make my life perfect.

I don't like this feeling, knowing that what i always attributed to my depression and other misdiagnosed personality disorders - lack of motivation, chronic emptiness, impulsivity, violence, manipulation, and inability to ever properly connect or 'love' - is just who I am FOREVER makes me so hopeless.

What's the point in living? If I can never truly experience human connection and love? And if everyday feels like a chore with fleeting moments of stimulation? I feel so lost. Before when I was misdiagnosed with things like BPD, or when I was a child and couldn't be labeled by personality disorders, all my therapy centered around making my OWN life better and fulfilling. Now that I have ASPD all of a sudden my therapy only focuses on harm reduction? Is that the whole point of my life now? To be the least burdensome to others?

Sorry for the rant. I just can't figure out how to keep moving forward.

My life is literally a game. It’s fun when I get away with things, manipulate people, all that. But at the end of the day, I am so bored. And I don’t care about a lot of people, so I feel lonely even with a lot of friends.

I thought I had conduct disorder at like 14. I scrapped it and didn’t self diagnose because I thought it was a phase. I thought it was ahtism, got tested… nope. Now I realize it’s not a phase, and I’m having violent thoughts and urges. And I am so fucking bored. Exhausted.

I got a new therapist and opened up about my “cruelty” for the first time in 7 years of therapy. I was laughing, because it was genuinely funny. He seemed disturbed despite telling me he’s worked with criminals and sexual abusers. I’m 20, so I don’t have much access to any serious testing. And if I piss him off enough, I’ll probably get terminated, no? I’m so frustrated. It feels like I’m the only one who’s actually playing. Everyone is just… being normal. I’m not trying to be edgy.

I feel like recently I’ve had to do more slightly extreme things to feel the same “high” I used to when I was a child, and I’m concerned I’ll end up in jail or some shit. Do y’all take a cute little pill? What do you guys do to stay out of trouble and feel normal?

(BEFORE U ASK HOW THIS IS RELATED TO ASPD, im the guy with aspd in this situation )

I always suffer to deal with frustration and perceived offense. But now im self-aware of it. And thats worse!?

Because now i understand that im probably overreacting because of the disorder... but i still mad and i still feel like shit.

Im so easily offended. And sometimes i do try to argue with people the most gentle way i can asking them to maybe... Change their behavior to stop offending me so we dont have a fight.

But people are not very understanding.

Straight to the goal: if you have aspd too how do you deal with being stressed/offended or upset at someone. Can you stop yourself before reacting, so you stay may for a long time?

My therapist haven't gave me nothing to help 🥹🥹🥹and he is so expensive too

(Not trying to imply anything but i do need tips now)

I’ve been reading through here a bit, and a lot of yall seem to have more fun extravagant ways of dealing with the extreme boredom. Is it over-representation on this subreddit or am I just the odd man out?

When I get bored my primary go-to is sleep. Sleep or doomscroll. Or drugs. I still do the occasional trespassing, theft, destruction of property, or whatever else I can get my hands on when it gets really bad, but how the hell are some of yall talking like you go out every night and steal a car? Am I lame or what?

I mean, granted, I have MDD and hypersomnia so sleeping is probably an easier alternative for me than most others, but still I have no idea how yall find the time and energy to go out and do this shit all the time. Does it ever cross your mind that you can just green out and watch South Park?

Maybe I just need to step my game up lol. Goddamn.

I'm really into like mental health stuff especially cluster b disorders , mainly because of the horrible stigma around them and also being diagnosed with one (eupd/bpd, though i kinda want a second opinion, it fits but idk what they based it on but im rambling) and because of the stigma it's hard to find any good info. i can read as many studies as i want and understand that side of it but im more interested in like the subjective views/feelings of people who have them

I was pretty recently diagnosed, so I searched up "celebrities with aspd" thinking that one of them could've spoken about it opening up, but literally, almost all of them were serial killers or terrible people. I said to myself, "Well, I know who I am for the most part, so maybe I can deal with this," yet I feel as if in the back of my head if I eventually spiral from some of my other mental issues I could end up becoming a bad person per sey. The majority of the time, I have absolutely 0 desire to better myself, n I really dislike people to the point I'm becoming severely secluded.

I have a few friends, but when they talk about the things they're doing in life or what they're going to do, I end up thinking how I wish I could get to that point or I end up getting a bit envious that they can find it easy to find meaning things such as hanging out or traveling.

I've been in a mental institute before, but I found it pretty unhelpful because, for the most part, I don't see a problem with how I am, I just didn't talk to many people n waited until my discharge. I just want to know if anyone has been at a point in their life n overcome it or if they're also working on bettering themselves n have ways that actually help.

My “social indifference” comes in the shape of a lot of mockery of humans in my mind, curious to know if that’s common

I have a friend who has ASPD, we have been friends for a long time. I have DID and only recently came out of dormancy so I am still getting to know him.

I’m having major issues because if he cannot feel empathy and views our relationship as give and take then how do I know if he genuinely cares about me? He says he does but because of the disorder it’s not like affective empathy. I’m worried that if I am unable to give what he wants then what is keeping him being friends with me? And while he says he cares about me does he only care about how it affects HIM?

I do not have ASPD and can be classified as someone with high levels of empathy (to a fault) so it is a bit hard for me to wrap my head around and makes me feel very insecure in the relationship. My headmates have been close friends with him for a long time so they obviously are comfortable with it and while I would like to communicate more with them it is very difficult for me at this time.

I’m looking for any advice, comfort/understanding/support and even being educated as I’m aware there are many things I may not be aware of or fully understand.

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Im talking about how we experience ourselves, what we think of ourselves and who we are. While everybody changes throughout their life, some people experience more rapid changes in identity while others remain roughly unchanged, **how their experience of themselves remains fairly the same for them**.

I was diagnoed with cptsd and aspd, and i have been trying to understand the aspd part of my diagnosis more. How i experience myself has changed rapidly throughout my life. it can be identity fragmentation fron cptsd of course but i got curious about others experince.

For as long as I can remember, I have never really been liked by other women (occupationally and among peers). Although this isn't strictly ASPD-related, I am curious. Do you find it easier to get along with other women, or men?

I think it is difficult to have these discussions as a woman without immediately being labelled as a 'pick-me'.

I personally find it difficult to decipher what (normative) women may think or feel about me, and often wasn't sure whether the extent to which I was masking is enough.

Decided to try and give therapy another shot. Told her I’ve been dx with aspd and npd. We spent 2/3 of our intake doing a depression and anxiety screening. Such a waste of time. It’s so frustrating that every therapist I’ve seen is so ill equipped to treat personality disorders

How did/does it affect you?
(Only answer if you have ASPD)

I feel like im doing everything i could possibly be doing but nothing ever satisfies me or make me feel anything no matter how risky it is or how exciting. i just cant escape the feeling, sometimes substances temporary get it out of my head but it doesnt work long term. im almost never home and travel to fill the void but it just never ends. i had a long therapy journey since i was mandated in elementary school (or i would be thrown out) and im able to control my violent urges but i just cant seem to find other excitement. i am a diagnosed adult and id like to improve my life quality with my disorder, i know i wont ever be able to feel most emotions but im seeking advice on how to live more peacefully from others with the same disorder