Asked this originally on a more lifestyle-oriented subreddit, but I guess they didn't like the question. :(

TL;DR: How do I choose between moving to another state for my dream job and or finish out paying my mortgage in the condo I almost own?

Hello all,

I have been working a stable, public-sector job for the past six years with amazing health insurance and job security. However, it has been making me so sad and depressed as I have been stagnant in career growth and compensation. As costs rise, my salary has not and I have been denied any kind of growth both career and compensation-wise three times now. Most days I cry after meetings.

On top of that, I bought a small condo early 2017 on a fifteen year mortgage. I have about 4.7 years left on it before I own it outright. It has been one of the few things stable in my life, and I've spent the past decade making it my own.

This week, I was offered my dream job near Boston, MA, where cost of living is roughly 50% more. However, this job is offering almost twice my current salary. It is private sector, so it would be more unstable, but it would look amazing on my resume and it offers a lot of challenge and mental stimulation.

It would also require me to sell the condo so I could move to the area (renting it out is not an option I'm willing to pursue).

Edit, reasons why I'm not inclined to rent:

• The condo flooded in July. The downstairs has been under renovation since, and it's been a nightmare of contractors just not showing up. I can't rent it out until it's finished and my insurance claim is closed.
• The homeowners across from me rented theirs and they were just nightmare tenants, allowing their dogs to poop and pee all over their house; it was a terrible time for me, and I it made me realize what a headache tenants could potentially be.
• I have a custom bookshelf in there with an attached ladder that's 14' high. While it's my baby, I'm a bit worried that if a tenant falls from it; I'll be liable.

I'm terrified because it's a big change, and because I live alone, it feels like starting my homeownership journey over or even aborting it entirely because owning is just so expensive, but I also really know it's time for me to move on from where I am in my career and have the next stage in my journey.

For those who you have made this decision, how did it work out for you? What did you consider? How did you wind up adapting to a whole new life?

TIA!

Hi everyone. So lately one of the things I’ve been trying to do is find a budgeting app that actually works for me.

A lot of people recommended YNAB (You Need a Budget), so I signed up and connected all my financial accounts. However, after exploring the app, I’ve realized that I really don’t like it. 😭 I know so many people swear by YNAB and credit it with completely changing their relationship with money, but I just don’t care for the interface or the zero-based budgeting approach.

I used to use Mint, and I really liked how it automatically pulled in my transactions, categorized my spending, identified recurring bills, and gave me a clear overview of my finances. Of course, it wasn’t perfect, and I occasionally had to correct categories or transactions, but I appreciated how much of the work it did automatically.

Ideally, I’m looking for something similar. I want to connect all my accounts, have the app intelligently recognize and categorize my transactions, identify recurring expenses, and give me a comprehensive picture of where my money is going. I don’t mind making adjustments, but I don’t necessarily want to manually assign every dollar a job.

I’ve researched Monarch Money, Copilot, Quicken Simplifi, and a few others, but the reviews are all over the place.

So I’m curious: What budgeting or personal finance apps are you all using, and what do you genuinely like or dislike about them? Am I the only person who doesn’t love YNAB? 😂

I’d especially love recommendations from anyone who used to use Mint and found a good replacement!

Welcome back to the “Workplace Wednesday” thread!

If you’re seeking advice from the sub regarding your specific situation, whether it’s about interviewing/benefits/negotiating/advancement opportunities, etc., it belongs here.

Bring us your burning questions!

Hey all, I’ve been thinking for months (years, really) about moving from MCOL major-city Texas to NYC, though I’d be moving away from my support system (not too bad?)

Currently, I make 105k (take home 4.4k each month, except for 3 paycheck months), max out my 401k and rIRA, travel internationally about 2x a year, and domestically 1-2 times a year, usually at least once to NYC. I’m in my mid-20s. Live about 3 hours from family, includes 2 grandparents, parents, and sibling. Went to university here, though I’m not very close with anybody. My emergency fund is very overfunded at 35k~, and I’m working to get it to 40k to feel fully comfortable, just not as working as hard as I did to get it to 35k.

I’ve always dreamed of living in NYC, each time I visit, it just feels right. Maybe it’s because I don’t have a license and can’t drive. My company has a few offices there, and across the Hudson. I’ve got 6 friends/acquaintances there, so it’s not a complete reset. I get my current lifestyle of traveling a ton wouldn’t be viable, especially since I’d have to take PTO to travel and visit family (currently just work from the bus).

I’m just worried about making a move, considering the state of the world. I’m a product designer, which is a really rough field to be in at any experience level. I think my role and company are relatively safe, but one never knows. It’s just scary to move to such a higher cost of living.

Is anyone else facing the same challenge? Or, did you once face this challenge, during the great recession or another confusing time?

ya’ll I desperately need a convo on this Receipt. I’ve never felt so much about one before lol

What have you spent money on for yourself that was genuinely worth it but more importantly how did you get comfortable spending?
I’m turning 45 and realizing that while my financial circumstances have changed considerably over the years, my mindset around spending money on myself hasn’t necessarily kept up.
I’m financially comfortable and not particularly frugal across the board. I travel extensively, love good food and experiences, and have no problem spending on certain things. But when it comes to beauty, skincare, facials, treatments, and other forms of personal maintenance or indulgence, I become almost absurdly price-conscious.
I’ll research Groupon deals, compare salons, wonder whether I should wait until I’m traveling somewhere cheaper, and spend an unreasonable amount of time trying to save $30 or $50. It’s a habit I developed when I was younger and had less disposable income, but I’m increasingly questioning whether it still serves me.
But there’s another dimension to this: I genuinely don’t know what’s worth spending money on anymore.
There’s SO much noise around beauty, skincare, aging, and self-care. Every other treatment promises incredible results, every dermatologist or aesthetician seems to have a different opinion, and social media makes everything sound simultaneously essential and completely unnecessary.
For example, I’ll consider getting regular facials, then read that they don’t really do anything a good skincare routine can’t accomplish. I’ll look into more advanced treatments, then worry they’re too invasive, unnecessary, or potentially counterproductive. So I end up sticking with my serums, doing the occasional inexpensive facial or massage, and not really exploring much else.
And perhaps I’m missing out on things that could genuinely make a difference—not necessarily in looking younger, but in feeling better, more polished, more confident, or simply enjoying life more.
I also have friends who seem perfectly comfortable spending hundreds on treatments or other things for themselves while economizing in areas where I wouldn’t think twice about spending. They seem to have a much clearer sense of what is worth their money.
I don’t want to become someone who justifies every expensive purchase as “investing in myself.” I’m skeptical of the beauty industry’s tendency to manufacture insecurities and then sell us solutions. But I also don’t want that skepticism, combined with my instinct to find the best deal, to prevent me from enjoying things I can comfortably afford.
So I have two questions for women who are in their late 30s, 40s, 50s, and beyond:
What have you actually spent money on for yourself that you consider absolutely worth it? Beauty treatments, facials, skincare, hair, body treatments, wellness, personal services, or even something completely unrelated. I’m especially interested in things where you initially hesitated at the price but afterward thought, why didn’t I start doing this years ago? Conversely, what turned out to be an expensive disappointment?
If you used to be very price-conscious about spending on yourself, what actually changed your mindset? Not just intellectually understanding that you can afford something, but genuinely becoming comfortable spending without obsessively comparing prices or feeling that you need to justify every indulgence.
I know the usual advice about investing in yourself, valuing your time, and remembering that you deserve nice things. I agree with all of it intellectually. But that hasn’t necessarily translated into changing my behavior.
I’d love specific experiences, actual recommendations, and honest reflections from women who’ve navigated this. Particularly those who are discerning about what they spend on rather than simply enthusiastic about expensive self-care.
I’m not looking to spend more money for the sake of spending it. I want to get better at recognizing what’s genuinely worth my money and then actually allowing myself to enjoy it.

Hi, everyone!
I’ve been lurking in this community for a while, and I’ve finally decided to contribute a Money Diary of my own.
I’m a 32-year-old single, child-free woman living in South Alabama. I’ve been a federal employee for a little over six years and currently earn approximately $99,500 annually.

Earlier this year, I purchased my first home. It’s a three-bedroom new construction in a neighborhood I really like, and I’m responsible for the mortgage and household expenses entirely on my own.

On paper, I feel like I should be doing pretty well financially. I have a stable career, retirement savings, investments, an emergency fund, and a paid-off vehicle
However, I’m also carrying credit card debt, student loans, and furniture financing. More importantly, I’ve realized that I have some pretty terrible habits when it comes to managing my money.
I make more money now than I’ve ever made in my life, but I don’t necessarily feel financially secure.

I’ve read Money Diaries from women who are younger than me, make similar salaries, and have significantly more saved and invested. I’ll admit that sometimes I finish reading those posts feeling discouraged about my own financial situation.

I’m hoping that writing everything out will help me understand where my money is going and finally develop some structure around my finances.

Assets
Thrift Savings Plan (TSP): Approximately $79,000
Acorns investment account: Approximately $11,152
American Express high-yield savings: Approximately $7,886
Savings from home purchase funds: Approximately $3,934
Primary checking account: Balance fluctuates significantly
Additional savings account: Approximately $418
Home: Approximately $294,000 in estimated value
Vehicle: Paid off; value not included
Total financial assets listed, excluding my home and vehicle: Approximately $102,400.

My American Express savings account is my emergency fund. It currently earns approximately 3.2% APY, and my goal is to have at least $20,000 saved there by the end of 2027.

The approximately $3,900 in my other savings account is the remaining portion of the money I received from my father and borrowed from my TSP when purchasing my home. I’ve been trying to preserve what’s left and use it wisely.

Debt
Mortgage: Approximately $292,500 remaining
Navy Federal credit card: Approximately $11,000
Student loans: Approximately $40,000
TSP residential loan: Originally $10,000
Ashley Furniture financing: Approximately $2,000 originally financed
Mattress Firm financing: Approximately $2,000 originally financed

Credit card debt
This is probably my biggest financial concern right now.
I’ve accumulated approximately $11,000 in credit card debt over the years.
The balance was originally on my Discover card, which carried an interest rate of approximately 20%.
Last week, I completed a balance transfer from Discover to a Navy Federal credit card offering 0% promotional interest for approximately one year.

My goal is to eliminate the entire balance before that promotional period ends.
I’m currently considering two options.
The first is to liquidate my entire Acorns investment account and put approximately $11,000 toward the credit card balance.

The second is to liquidate approximately half of my Acorns investments, put around $5,500 toward the balance, and aggressively pay off the remaining $5,500 through biweekly payments over the next year.

My hesitation about liquidating the entire account is that doing so would leave me with approximately $7,000 in my primary emergency fund.

I know I would still have my TSP, but I don’t consider retirement savings money I can casually access.
Part of me feels uncomfortable giving up an investment account that I’ve spent years building.

On the other hand, I recognize that eliminating high-interest debt is generally a better financial decision than holding investments while paying approximately 20% interest.

Now that I’ve transferred the balance to a 0% promotional card, I’m trying to determine the best way to approach repayment without completely depleting my nonretirement investments.

Student loans
I have approximately $40,000 in federal student loan debt.
My current monthly payment is approximately $150–$180.
However, due to changes in my repayment plan and income recertification, I’ve been informed that my monthly payment could increase to approximately $400–$500 in the coming months.
I’m exploring options that may allow me to maintain a lower monthly payment.
I’m also planning to apply for a student loan repayment assistance program offered specifically through my federal employer.
If approved, the program may provide up to $10,000 annually toward eligible student loans, subject to the program’s requirements.
I’m comfortable with the employment commitment because I don’t anticipate leaving federal service anytime soon.

Furniture financing
After purchasing my home, I financed approximately $2,000 in furniture from Ashley Furniture and another $2,000 for a mattress from Mattress Firm.
Both accounts are financed through Wells Fargo.
My approximate monthly payments are:
Ashley Furniture: $60
Mattress Firm: $50
Both purchases have promotional 0% financing for five years, provided I comply with the financing terms.
My intention is to pay both balances off well before the promotional periods expire.

Income
Occupation: Federal employee
Annual gross salary: $99,500
Biweekly take-home pay: $2,223.51
Average monthly take-home pay: $4,817.61
This is my take-home pay after taxes, health insurance, retirement contributions, and other payroll deductions.
I currently contribute 5% of my salary to my TSP, which allows me to receive the full federal employer matching contribution.
Before purchasing my home, I contributed 10%. I temporarily reduced my contribution to 5% to give myself more financial breathing room while adjusting to homeownership.
I also have approximately $80–$85 deducted from each paycheck to repay my TSP residential loan.
Career and salary progression
I graduated from graduate school in 2019.
At the time, I was working at my university earning approximately $10 an hour for 20 hours per week.
When I started my federal career in 2020, I earned approximately $40,000–$45,000 annually.
I remember feeling like I had finally made it!
I had never earned that much money before, and suddenly I had a stable job, benefits, retirement contributions, and more disposable income than I’d previously experienced.
The following year, I became a GS-9 and earned closer to $50,000.
Eventually, I advanced to a GS-11, making a little over $70,000, and later became a GS-12.
I’ve been at the GS-12 level for approximately three years and currently earn around $99,500.
Looking back, my salary has increased substantially since I started my career. Unfortunately, I don’t think my financial habits have matured at the same pace.

Financial background
I grew up in a middle-class household.
My father was also a federal employee, and my family was financially comfortable. We never experienced significant financial hardship, at least not that I was aware of as a child.

My father has always been very good with money.

He taught me the importance of saving, investing, compound interest, and not spending money simply because you have it.

Even when I was in high school, he would send me articles about saving and investing.
When I started my federal career, he strongly encouraged me to begin contributing to my TSP immediately.
I’m incredibly grateful for that advice because retirement savings are one area where I feel I’ve done reasonably well.
My father was frugal, but we still enjoyed ourselves as a family. We generally took a family vacation once a year, and I never felt deprived growing up.
He simply wasn’t interested in spending money unnecessarily or keeping up appearances.
One of his proudest financial accomplishments is that he had our family home built for approximately $80,000 and paid off the mortgage in about eight years.
He made a conscious decision not to purchase an expensive home because he didn’t want to be burdened by a large mortgage payment.
He’s always emphasized that having the ability to afford something doesn’t necessarily mean you should buy it.
My father has also helped me financially throughout my life, and I want to acknowledge that privilege.
He purchased both of the vehicles I’ve owned.
The car I currently drive was a gift after I completed graduate school in 2019.
It’s a reliable sedan, and it’s completely paid off.
Every now and then, I get the urge to purchase something newer or more luxurious.
A few months ago, I mentioned the possibility to my father, and he immediately discouraged it.
His argument was that my current car works perfectly fine and that purchasing a luxury vehicle would mean taking on a car payment, higher maintenance expenses, and potentially more expensive insurance.
I didn’t purchase another vehicle, and I’m glad I didn’t.
Having no car payment is one of the biggest financial advantages I currently have.

Purchasing my first home
I purchased my home in April 2026 for approximately $295,000.
It’s a new-construction, three-bedroom home in a neighborhood I really like. It’s not particularly large or extravagant, but it’s more than enough space for one person.

Why I decided to buy
My mother passed away in 2024.
Approximately six months after her passing, I moved back into my childhood home with my father.
I lived there for about a year and a half before purchasing my house.
During that time, I was working, saving money, and paying down some of my existing financial obligations.
In hindsight, I probably could have saved substantially more than I did.
My father never pressured me to leave.
In fact, I genuinely believe that if I had wanted to continue living there indefinitely, he would have been perfectly fine with it.
However, I knew it was time for me to establish my own independence.
My father had started a new relationship, and although that wasn’t a problem, I wanted to give him his space and begin creating a life of my own.
There was also an emotional component.
Living in my childhood home after losing my mother was difficult at times.
I was constantly surrounded by reminders of her.
Of course, I cherish those memories, but I also felt like I needed a change of environment.
I wanted somewhere that felt like my own space, where I could create new memories while continuing to process everything that had happened.
I was also at a point in my life where I felt somewhat stagnant.
I had a stable career and was making decent money, but I wanted something tangible to work toward.
Homeownership felt like a logical next step.
I liked the idea of building equity rather than renting, and I believed the neighborhood would be a good long-term investment, although I understand that appreciation isn’t guaranteed.

How I financed the purchase
I originally didn’t realize that I would qualify for USDA financing.
Because I ultimately qualified, I was able to purchase my home with very little money out of pocket.

My total personal cash contribution at closing was approximately $500.
I also received approximately $20,000 in builder incentives.
Those incentives helped cover upgrades and items I otherwise would have needed to purchase separately, including blinds, gutters, ceiling fans, a refrigerator, and a washer and dryer.
This was an enormous help because I was starting from scratch with a house.
My father also gifted me $10,000 to help with home-related expenses.
Additionally, I took out a $10,000 residential loan from my TSP.
At the time, my TSP balance was approximately $85,000. Taking the loan reduced the invested balance to around $75,000.
I’ve since built it back up to approximately $79,000.
I know borrowing from retirement savings is controversial, and several people advised me against it.
My thinking at the time was that I was using the money to help establish myself in a home rather than purchasing a depreciating asset.
I also liked that I would repay the loan through payroll deductions.
However, I now understand that borrowing from my retirement account comes with opportunity costs and risks, even though the interest is paid back into my account.
Between the gift from my father and the TSP loan, I had approximately $20,000 available to help establish my household.
I currently have approximately $4,000 remaining from those funds.
A substantial amount went toward furnishing the house and covering expenses during the transition.
I also made some mistakes during my first few months of homeownership.
Initially, I paid my mortgage once a month. Unfortunately, I wasn’t always disciplined enough to leave the full payment sitting in my checking account.
By the time the payment was due, I sometimes didn’t have enough money available.
Rather than having a consistent system, I would transfer money from the funds I’d set aside after purchasing the home.
That contributed to those funds dwindling faster than I’d anticipated.
I’ve since changed my mortgage payment arrangement.

Mortgage
My mortgage has a 2/1 temporary interest-rate buydown.
My interest rate is approximately 2.5% during the first year, increases to approximately 3.5% during the second year, and eventually settles at a permanent rate of 4.75%.

My current monthly mortgage obligation is approximately $1,380, including escrow.
Because my home is new construction, I’m also making additional contributions toward escrow.

My property taxes were initially assessed based primarily on the land rather than the completed home. I expect my property tax obligation to increase once the property is fully reassessed.

The builder recommended setting aside additional escrow funds to help prepare for that increase.

I have my mortgage set up so that approximately half of the monthly payment, including my additional escrow contribution, is automatically withdrawn every two weeks shortly after payday.

This has helped tremendously because I no longer have to rely on myself to remember to set aside the entire payment.
I also know that my mortgage payment will increase as the temporary interest-rate buydown expires.

That’s one of the reasons I’m trying to get a better handle on my finances now rather than waiting until my mortgage payment increases.

How I feel about homeownership
I’m proud of myself for buying a home.
At the same time, I don’t think I fully anticipated how different my life would feel after moving out on my own.
I’ve been in the house for approximately six months.
There are days when I absolutely love it. I love having my own space, decorating it, and knowing that everything belongs to me.
Other days, I feel a little isolated.
I’m single, don’t have children, and spend a lot of time at home.
I’ve considered getting a dog, but I’m usually away from home for nine or ten hours on weekdays, and I don’t think that would be fair to a new pet right now.
I’m still figuring out how to make my house feel like a home rather than simply a place where I sleep after work.

Fixed monthly expenses
These are my approximate recurring expenses.

Expense
Monthly amount
Mortgage, including escrow and additional escrow contributions
Approximately $1,380
Internet
$80
Cellphone
$140
Auto insurance
$130
Water and other local utilities
Approximately $124 based on a recent payment
Electricity
To be confirmed
Lawn care
Approximately $98
Gym membership
$40–$45
Streaming subscriptions
Approximately $20
Student loan payment
Currently $150–$180
Ashley Furniture
$60
Mattress Firm
$50
Credit card payments
Variable
Gas
Approximately $80–$90
Groceries
Variable
Dining out
Variable
Homeowners insurance is included in my mortgage escrow.
I pay a neighbor approximately $45 every two weeks to maintain my lawn.
My gym membership is offered through a fitness program that gives me access to several gyms in my area.
I don’t go nearly as often as I should.

Savings and investments
I currently have several automatic savings arrangements.
American Express HYSA: $200 every two weeks
Additional savings account: $50 every two weeks
Acorns: Approximately $28 weekly, plus roundups
TSP: 5% of my gross salary through payroll deductions
My American Express savings account is my emergency fund.
My goal is to increase that balance to at least $20,000 by the end of next year.
Acorns is an account I’ve been contributing to for years. I like that the contributions happen automatically and that my purchases are rounded up and invested.
However, I’m now reconsidering whether continuing those contributions makes sense while carrying credit card debt.
One thing I’ve noticed is that I have a lot of money moving automatically between different accounts.
Individually, the transfers don’t seem particularly significant.
But collectively, they add up.
And because I haven’t been consistently monitoring my checking account, I sometimes underestimate how much money is leaving it.

The Money Diary
A note: The following describes a representative week based on my usual routine. My actual spending varies, especially on weekends.
Day 1: Monday
6:25 AM: My alarm goes off, and I immediately make the mistake of picking up my phone.
I tell myself I’m going to check one notification.
Twenty minutes later, I’m scrolling through TikTok.
This is a terrible habit I’ve developed, and it sometimes makes me late for work.
I finally get out of bed, brush my teeth, wash my face, iron my clothes, and do my makeup.
I’m supposed to be at work at 8 AM.
My commute is approximately 20–25 minutes, so I don’t have much time to waste.
I rarely eat breakfast during the workweek.
I have ADHD and take Vyvanse on some mornings. On those days, I generally skip coffee.
If I want coffee on another morning, I usually make it at home or use the Keurig at work.
8 AM: I arrive at work and start my day.
I work in an office environment, and most of my day involves reviewing documents, handling assignments, and responding to emails.
12 PM: Lunchtime.
This is probably one of my biggest unnecessary spending categories.
My workplace has a cafeteria with different food vendors, and I buy lunch almost every day.
I’ve been at my current job for approximately a year, and I can probably count on two hands how many times I’ve brought lunch from home.
I’m not exaggerating.
Lunch generally costs between $15 and $20.
Sometimes I’ll also purchase a snack during the afternoon.
5 PM: I leave work and head home.
5:30 PM: I’m home!
I straighten up the house and spend some time browsing Pinterest and TikTok for decorating inspiration.
My house still isn’t furnished exactly how I’d like it to be.
I have the major furniture pieces, but I’m still looking for artwork, rugs, lamps, and smaller decorative items.
The funny thing is that I spend an embarrassing amount of time looking at furniture and home decor without actually buying anything.
I get overwhelmed trying to decide what looks best.
It took me months to choose a couch.
7 PM: I start winding down.
Depending on the day, I might go for a short walk around my neighborhood, catch up on television, or spend more time on my phone.
Monday evenings are usually reserved for catching up on Real Housewives.
8 PM: Shower, skincare, and getting ready for bed.
My evening routine takes about an hour.
10 PM: I’m usually asleep somewhere between 9:30 and 11 PM, depending on whether I’ve taken melatonin.
Typical Monday spending: Approximately $25–$40, depending on meals and incidental purchases.

Day 2: Tuesday
6:30 AM: Another weekday, another battle with my alarm clock.
I go through my usual morning routine and head to work.
8 AM: Work.
12 PM: I buy lunch from one of the vendors at work.
I’ve been thinking about how much money I could save if I brought lunch more consistently.
Spending $15–$20 on lunch doesn’t seem like a huge deal when I’m making the purchase, but doing it four or five times a week adds up quickly.
5 PM: I head home.
I consider going to the gym.
I have a membership that gives me access to multiple gyms, and I genuinely enjoy exercising once I’m there.
The problem is getting myself there.
Sometimes the smallest inconvenience is enough for me to change my mind.
If I’ve recently done my hair, for example, I might convince myself to skip the gym because I don’t want to sweat it out.
I’m working on that.
6 PM: Depending on my energy level, I might take a walk around my neighborhood instead.
7 PM: Dinner and television.
I spend the remainder of the evening relaxing and getting ready for the next day.
Spending varies, usually driven by food purchases.

Day 3: Wednesday
6:20 AM: I wake up and get ready for work.
8 AM: Work.
12 PM: Another purchased lunch.
At this point, I’m realizing how predictable my weekday spending habits are.
I don’t necessarily make huge purchases every day. Instead, I repeatedly make smaller purchases without giving them much thought.
5 PM: I head home.
5:30 PM: I spend some time looking at things I still want for my house.
I have several rooms that aren’t quite finished.
I’ve been trying to make my home feel cozy and sophisticated without buying random things just to fill empty spaces.
Sometimes I add items to my cart and leave them there for days.
Other times, I convince myself that I need to finish decorating immediately.
Thankfully, indecision occasionally saves me money.
7 PM: Dinner, television, and my evening routine.
Spending varies.

Day 4: Thursday
6:30 AM: Wake up, get ready, and head to work.
8 AM: Work.
12 PM: Lunch at the office.
I know I need to develop a better routine for meal preparation.
I’ve recently started shopping at Sam’s Club because I want to buy certain foods in bulk, portion them out, freeze them, and cook more consistently throughout the week.
I’m hoping that will help reduce my reliance on restaurant meals.
5 PM: I leave work.
5:30 PM: Home.
Depending on how tired I am, I might do laundry, clean, watch television, or spend the evening on my phone.
I know my weekday routine probably sounds boring.
Honestly, sometimes it feels boring to me, too.
I think part of the challenge of living alone is figuring out how to build a fulfilling routine that doesn’t revolve around spending money.
Spending varies.

Day 5: Friday
6:30 AM: I wake up and get ready for my last workday of the week.
8 AM: Work.
12 PM: Lunch.
5 PM: Finally, the weekend!
My Friday evenings vary.
Sometimes I go straight home because I’m exhausted and don’t feel like doing anything.
Other times, I’ll meet friends for dinner or drinks.
If I go out, I typically spend around $40, sometimes more depending on where we go.
I enjoy going out occasionally, but I’m not someone who’s partying every weekend.
9 PM: If I’m home, I’m probably watching television, scrolling on my phone, or looking at home decor.
Typical social outing: Approximately $40, when I go out.

Day 6: Saturday
8 AM: I usually wake up earlier than I’d like, even though I don’t have to work.
I actually enjoy my Saturday mornings.
I try to get outside for a longer walk, usually around two or three miles.
10 AM: I like stopping at a local coffee shop for coffee and sometimes breakfast or a pastry.
This generally costs around $15–$20.
I know I could make coffee at home, but I genuinely enjoy going to coffee shops on the weekend.
It’s one of my little routines.
12 PM: I might stop by TJ Maxx, HomeGoods, or another store to browse.
Since buying my house, I’ve become very interested in home decor.
I enjoy looking for smaller decorative pieces, although I try not to spend more than approximately $70 during one of these shopping trips.
I probably do this every other weekend rather than every Saturday.
3 PM: Back home.
I might clean, organize something, or continue working on a room.
6 PM: I usually don’t feel like cooking on Saturdays.
I don’t know why, but Saturday is the one day when I almost always want someone else to prepare my food.
Sometimes I’ll order something, and other times I’ll go out.
If friends invite me somewhere, I may join them.
9 PM: I’m usually home relaxing unless I have social plans.
Saturday spending varies considerably depending on shopping, dining, and social plans.

Day 7: Sunday
8 AM: I wake up and ease into the day.
Sunday is generally my reset day.
I might stop at a local coffee shop and get something to drink or eat.
10 AM: I start cleaning my house.
I genuinely enjoy having a clean home, so I try to get everything organized before the workweek begins.
Laundry, cleaning the bathrooms, straightening the living room, and getting my bedroom together are usually on the agenda.
12 PM: I might visit family or meet someone for brunch.
If I don’t have plans, I generally stay home.
3 PM: I do my hair for the upcoming week.
This can take a while depending on what style I’m doing.
5 PM: I try to get organized for Monday.
Sometimes I’ll cook something that can last a few days, although I need to become much more consistent with meal preparation.
7 PM: Shower, skincare, television, and mentally preparing myself to return to work.
10 PM: Bed.
Sunday spending varies depending on coffee, groceries, brunch, and other errands.

Weekly spending
I haven’t calculated a precise weekly total because my spending fluctuates and I don’t want to pretend this representative week reflects seven specific transactions.
However, based on my usual habits, these are the areas where I consistently spend money:
Work lunches: Approximately $60–$100 per week
Weekend coffee and breakfast: Approximately $30–$40
Gas: Approximately $20 per week
Occasional dining out or drinks: Approximately $40 per outing
Home decor shopping: Up to approximately $70 during a shopping trip, usually every other weekend
DoorDash: Often at least one order between paychecks, sometimes around $50
My grocery spending varies, and I’m actively trying to reduce how much I rely on takeout and restaurant meals.
The numbers may not look particularly alarming individually, but I know the frequency of these purchases is a problem.

Reflection
This is probably the most uncomfortable part of writing this Money Diary.
On paper, I think most people would assume I’m doing reasonably well.
I’m 32, make almost $100,000 annually, own a home, don’t have children, and drive a paid-off car.
I have retirement savings, investments, and an emergency fund.
But I don’t feel particularly financially secure.
And the uncomfortable truth is that a lot of that comes down to my own habits.
I avoid looking at my money.
This is probably my biggest financial weakness.
I don’t consistently check my bank account.
I know approximately what should come out of my paycheck, but I don’t always pay attention to when everything actually gets deducted.
I know my mortgage payment comes out.
I know $200 goes into my emergency fund every two weeks.
I know another $50 goes into savings.
I know I have other automatic payments and transfers.
But after that?
I’m essentially winging it.
I spend money without consistently checking how much is available.
Then I’ll receive a low-balance notification and wonder how my checking account got so low.
For example, I recently got paid $2,223.51, and within days I received a notification that my checking account had dropped to around $68.
I wasn’t on vacation.
I hadn’t purchased a designer handbag.
I hadn’t spent the weekend partying.
My money was simply being pulled in multiple directions through bills, transfers, payments, and everyday purchases.
I know that’s not an excuse. It’s precisely why I need a better system.
I’ve paid overdraft fees that could have been avoided.
This is embarrassing to admit, but I incurred approximately $150 in overdraft fees over the past month.
My bank agreed to refund about half of those fees.
Still, that’s money I shouldn’t have lost in the first place.
And it’s especially frustrating because I have money sitting in other accounts.
The issue isn’t always that I don’t have any money.
It’s that I’m not paying enough attention to where the money is, what’s coming out, and when those transactions will happen.

I thought buying a house would make me more financially disciplined.
This might sound ridiculous, but I genuinely thought purchasing a home would force me to become better with money.
I figured that having a mortgage and household responsibilities would naturally make me more organized.
Unfortunately, that didn’t happen automatically.
I had to learn that lesson the hard way.

During my first few months of homeownership, I sometimes struggled to have the full mortgage payment available when it was due.
That was partly because I wasn’t setting aside the money consistently.
I would end up transferring money from the funds I’d received for my home purchase.
Looking back, I can see how quickly that became a bad habit.
Setting up automatic biweekly mortgage payments has helped, but I know I need to apply that same level of structure to the rest of my finances.

I don’t think I have a spending problem in the traditional sense.

I’m not constantly buying luxury items.

I don’t have a car payment.

I don’t take expensive vacations every month.

I’m not out partying every weekend.

But I do spend money too casually.

I’ll spend $20 on lunch without thinking about it.

I’ll order DoorDash because I don’t feel like cooking.

I’ll stop for coffee on Saturday and Sunday.

I’ll purchase something for my house because I want it to feel more finished.

None of these purchases seems particularly significant at the time.

But when I add everything together, I can see how much money I’m spending without a plan.

And I think that’s my actual problem.
I don’t have enough structure around my money.

I also struggle with financial anxiety.
Something about checking my bank account makes me anxious.
I know that sounds counterproductive because avoiding my accounts ultimately makes the situation worse.
But sometimes I genuinely don’t want to know what’s in there.
I think I’ve developed a habit of avoiding financial information that might make me uncomfortable.
It’s almost like I would rather assume everything is fine than confront the numbers.
Obviously, that isn’t sustainable.

I’m proud of some things, though.
I’m proud that I started investing in retirement as soon as I began my federal career.
I’m proud that I’ve progressed professionally and increased my income.
I’m grateful that my father taught me the importance of saving and that he was able to help me financially.
I’m also proud that I purchased my first home.
Even though I sometimes question whether I was completely prepared for homeownership, I don’t regret wanting independence or trying to establish something for myself.
I just wish I’d developed stronger financial habits before taking on such a significant responsibility.

My goals
My biggest financial priorities right now are:
Eliminate my approximately $11,000 in credit card debt before the 0% promotional period expires.
Increase my emergency fund to at least $20,000 by the end of 2027.
Develop a realistic budget that I actually follow.
Stop paying unnecessary overdraft fees.
Become more consistent about checking my accounts.
Reduce how much I spend on lunches, takeout, and other convenience purchases.
Continue contributing to retirement while managing my other financial obligations.
Pay off my furniture financing before the promotional periods expire.
Prepare for my mortgage payment to increase as my temporary interest-rate buydown expires.
I also want to become more intentional about how I spend my free time.
Living alone has made me realize how easy it is to spend an evening scrolling through social media, browsing online stores, or ordering food simply because I’m bored or tired.
I want to build routines that are healthier, more fulfilling, and less centered on spending money.

Final thoughts
I know there are women in this community who are younger than me, earn less than I do, and have significantly more money saved.
Sometimes reading those posts makes me feel like I’m behind.
I know comparison isn’t particularly productive, especially because everyone’s circumstances are different.
But I’d be lying if I said it didn’t occasionally bother me.
When I look at my life, I can see that I’ve made progress.
I went from earning $10 an hour after graduate school to making nearly six figures.
I have a stable career, retirement savings, and a home.
But I also know that I should be managing my income much more responsibly than I currently am.
I don’t want to reach 35 or 40 and still be making the same mistakes.
I’m sharing this because I want to be more accountable and because I’m genuinely interested in hearing how other women manage their finances, particularly those who own homes and live on a single income.

I know some of my decisions will be criticized.

The TSP loan, credit card debt, furniture financing, and lack of consistent
budgeting are all fair topics for discussion.

I’m not going to pretend that every decision I’ve made has been the best one.

But I am trying to improve.

So please feel free to offer constructive criticism, suggestions, or share your own experiences.

Just go a little easy on me. 😂 I’m already aware that I have A LOT of work to do.

Welcome back to "Off-Topic Tuesday", followed by "Workplace Wednesday" tomorrow!

As always, anything and everything finance and non-finance related is welcome here. Feel free to vent, seek advice, discuss current events, or share a little about yourself. :)

If you haven't already heard - we're mixing it up a little bit here on the OT thread. Continue to feel free to post your own prompt/question below (just one per comment), and answer prompts from others!

*** You may have noticed a recent uptick in spam posts, please report them as you see them. It takes 3 reports to flag a post for mod review. Thank you to everyone already reporting!

Section One: Assets and Debt 

Retirement Balance: $15,000 in a Roth IRA. I opened my IRA in March of 2025 when the market was down with $2000 and immediately saw a huge boost. I have invested my own savings, and was putting away about 7% of my income at my previous job for 10 months. When I left my job, I moved about $2000 from my 401K to my Roth. My parents also gave me $3000 to put in retirement as a graduation gift. 
Savings account balance: Regular savings - $638,16. HYSA - $14,523.48. CD - $11,599.87. This may seem weirdly high. I received $7,000 in inheritance from my great aunt (who was essentially a grandmother to me) when she passed in 2020. With the GI Bill (see more in my student loan section), I received a monthly stipend of about $1,800. I paid rent with this, but the remainder-about half-went into savings. This quickly ballooned, so by the time my benefits were out, I had $30,000 in savings. I went abroad the following semester, which was around $5,000, and had to occasionally dip into my savings throughout my last year and a half of school. I also put a good chunk into my Roth IRA over time. In February of this year, I totaled my car and ended up getting $8,000 for a car I paid $2,500 for (long story). Some of this money is also my own savings over the years. Essentially, the savings are a bit muddy. 
Checking account balance: $2,045.98
Credit card debt: $0, I have my credit card on auto pay full balance every month. 
Student loan debt: I am very lucky to have zero debt from college for an English and Film/Communications degree. My sister and I split my father’s GI Bill, which ended up covering about two and a half years of college. A big reason I chose my school was because they had a policy that once GI Bill benefits were used up, I received in-state tuition. In-state tuition was about $11,000 a year. I received about $8,000 in merit scholarships throughout college (part of which paid for my semester abroad). My parents opened an account when I was an infant, but didn’t contribute much as “the GI Bill was my college fund” according to my dad. This had about $8,000 by the time I needed it. My parents paid off the remaining $1,000 and change. 

Section Two: Income

Income Progression: 
15-18 years old: ~$9 an hour. Was paid under the table at my family’s Thai restaurant on weekends. My mom started picking up shifts at her uncle’s restaurant  and eventually passed them onto me. Despised this job, but my grandfather would give me extra cash every time, so the pay was slightly better.
18-21: ~15 an hour. Rough approximation of all my service industry jobs throughout college. I worked every semester of school and was pretty much full time during summers. 
21-22: ~25 an hour. Started bartending the summer before my senior year of college. It was a little dive bar on campus that ended up becoming a major source of community for me. It’s how I met my boyfriend! Worked part time throughout school and was briefly full time after graduation until I got my first big girl job. I was the Friday night bartender, our biggest night as we were closed on weekends, and generally walked away with $200-$350 on Fridays. 
22: $41,000. Despite feeling that I had wasted college, I finally got a full time position in September of 2025 as a trade journalist. Getting that offer letter was the best feeling in the world, even if I felt underpaid. However, I ended up hating it! I had to drive an hour and a half twice a week, and I am a very anxious driver. Ended up getting into a bad car accident one day in winter, and went fully remote. I found the industry boring and didn’t like writing full time. I only had about an hour of work a day, so I pretty much just sat around the house all day. Made me very depressed and desperate to get out of the Midwest. 
23: $27 an hour. While I know this is objectively low pay in NYC, it’s the most I’ve ever made! I feel simultaneously the richest and poorest I’ve ever been. I’m from Chicago and have dreamed of NYC for years, so when I got an offer at an Endodontic’s office in June of this year,  I took the plunge. I kind of hate the job. It’s very boring when it’s slow, I feel mentally unstimulated, and I deal with a lot of bullshit from insurance and patients. But, I have health insurance, it pays the bills, and I am no longer sitting around the house barely speaking. It is full in person, which is not ideal, but I am unfortunately too extroverted to work fully remote. I do qualify for overtime, which is guaranteed as I have to stay an extra hour once a week. We also get bonuses depending on how the practice performs.

Main Job Monthly Take Home:

$3400. This is a rough estimate, as each paycheck varies and I’m only three months in. Hoping to see how this starts to balance out now that I’ll be paying for health insurance and getting transit benefits. 

• $260 for health insurance. This just started at the start of the month as my office had a 90 day trial period, so I technically haven’t paid this yet. 
• $155 for TMA. Similarly, just became eligible to start deducting for transit benefits. 
• $1036 in taxes. Ouch.
• $0 for retirement. I know this is bad, ugh. I feel like I’m still catching up after moving, so this has taken the back burner. I think I’m just going to move a huge chunk from my HYSA and call it a day for the year. 

Side Gig Monthly Take Home

I wish! Considering picking up a food service gig. 

Any Other Monthly Income Here
My mom has helped me out a bit during my move. My credit card auto pay sent my checking into over draft twice in a row during my first two months here (first time in my life, felt awful). She saw the notification and sent me $500, part of which was reimbursing a flight I had bought to go visit her. 

Section Three: Expenses
Rent / Mortgage / HOA fees: $1200 for a room in a three bed, fifth floor walk up in Harlem. Sort of a shitty apartment, but certainly could be worse for the price. 
Renters / home insurance: $0
Savings contribution: $0
Investment contribution: $0
Debt payments: $0
Donations: $0
Electric: ~$100 a month, varies. Paid $150 for August and almost cried.
Wifi/Cable/Landline: $13 a month
Cellphone: $0. Still on my mom’s plan, but desperately need a new phone and am waiting for her to tell me I need to pay up lol. 
Subscriptions: $13 a month for Spotify
Gym membership: $0. I have been doing free outdoor workouts since I moved in July. Right now, I’m doing the free month of Class Pass.
Pet expenses: $0
Car payment / insurance: $0
Regular therapy: $0. Would like to start now that I have health insurance, but have an $80 copay per visit… may be out of the cards for now
Paid hobbies:$0

Money Diary

Sunday:
Wake up at 9:30, slightly hungover from a wine night with my college girlfriends. It’s a rainy day, and I immediately decide it’s going to be a nothing day. I finish reading House of Day, House of Night by Olga Tokarczuk, which has taken me much too long. 
I eat breakfast and watch tv before calling my boyfriend. We are three months into long distance, and it’s going pretty well. While chatting, my lens suddenly falls out of my glasses. Oops. I begrudgingly put in contacts and head out to do laundry.

I preloaded my laundry card with $100 when I first moved because it gave a bonus of $10, so technically laundry is free today. For reference, it’s $6.35 for a medium load and .60 cents per 10 minutes for drying. I stop at the hardware store on my way back after dropping off my clothes in the wash to buy an eyeglass repair kit ($3.58). I also stop at the grocery store which recently opened right across from my apartment. It’s expensive but incredibly convenient. I buy noodles, beef, white and brown rice, and strawberries ($23.52). 

I run home and fiddle with the glasses for about 20 minutes before ceding defeat. This is a moment where I wish I had my boyfriend. I head back to the laundromat and throw my stuff in the dryer, then play Pokopia while I wait. My boyfriend wanted a new Switch 2, so gave me his old one when I moved so that we could play games together, as we love Mario Kart. 

Heas home and make a basic noodle stir fry for lunch. My kitchen is my least favorite part of the apartment: ridiculously small and doesn’t have a hood above the gas stove. I finally decide to stock up on some necessities: a grease splatter screen, more chip clips, honey, and a new portable charger on Amazon ($48.90).

The rest of the day is unremarkable: more TV, calling my boyfriend, and dreading work the next day. I get about four servings out of the beef I bought. I make a simple red sauce pasta for half of it, and leave the other half for leftovers.

Daily Total: $76.00

Monday:
I wake up to someone buzzing the apartment just before 6 am and can’t fall back asleep. My phone tells me it was Amazon attempting to deliver a package. I hate that I live in a fob building. Figure I may as well get moving at around 7 and head out early ($3.00 for the train). Decide to get a PSL from Starbucks (bad, I know). I don’t drink much coffee as it tends to make me jittery/anxious, but today it makes me feel alive ($7.57). 

Slog through work and have my leftover pasta for lunch around 1. I have started eating at my desk and walking through Central Park during my 30 minute break everyday. It always makes me feel like a person again, despite having to weave through tourists. 

I head out just before 5 to make sure I get to my SoulCycle class on time. I’m doing the free month of ClassPass, so this is free. I take the subway to the UWS ($3.00) and find a crowded studio. I haven’t taken a cycle class since high school, and feel amazing. The class is immensely crowded, but the energy is high and the instructor is great. 45 minutes fly by, and though I’m sweaty, I have a feeling I won’t be particularly sore the next day.

I stop at an eyeglass store on the way home and they tell me to pick up my glasses the next day. I take the subway home ($3.00) and have a huge portion of beef and sweet potatoes for dinner. I start Wild Dark Shore on my Kobo, which I know was huge last year. It’s more commercial than I typically read, but I want something easy after my last read. I go to bed at about 10:30. 

Daily total: $13.57

Tuesday:

Up at 7:30 and feeling rested. Unfortunately not sore. Wouldn’t you know living in a fifth floor walk up does wonders for the body. I see that I’ve hit my weekly limit on the MTA ($2.00) which is always a nice surprise. 
Try not to put my head through my computer at work all morning and have leftover beef and potatoes for lunch. I have been very stressed about holiday travel because my office has a goofy policy where everyone gets a week off from November-January based on seniority. I bug my boss about it one more time, and it turns out being a pain works because she is able to ask everyone in about 5 minutes. I am third in line on our team of four, so I end up picking the week after Thanksgiving. 

I have come up with a convoluted plan to see my family in Phoenix and my boyfriend back in Wisconsin. My grandpa is sick, so they have finally moved him out west where the rest of my mom’s family is. She lives in Virginia, but is going to be out there for Thanksgiving, so I have been feeling pulled between my family and my boyfriend. Luckily, I find a multi-city flight where I can do both ($655.40). It’s a lot of money, but it was going to be about $450 to go to either place for Thanksgiving, so I get the best of both worlds.

I call my mom while I walk through the park to tell her my plan, and she says she’ll pay for part of it. A bit of background: I have essentially been financially independent since I started college. I paid my rent with the GI Bill and continued to do so after it ran out. My parents chipped in here and there, but I was almost completely on my own. Now, they’re actually getting a divorce (which should’ve happened 10 years ago). My father was definitely the breadwinner, so my mom has had to adjust to being on her own. I feel guilty because I know she’s struggling until their lawyers negotiate her spousal support. But I also need the help. It’s complicated, to say the least. 

It’s so slow at work that I sneakily read my book for the rest of the day. I have underestimated it, I can’t look away. My manager messages me 10 minutes before 5 to say I can head out. I think he saw me reading.

I walk over to the Duane Reade by my office to pick up my birth control and get my flu shot. I was very nervous because I take Slynd and wasn’t sure if it would be covered by my new insurance without a doctor’s note. Luckily, it is! I wait for 30 minutes for the flu shot. Then I rush to the UWS to pick up my glasses before they close at 6.

I go home and make a chicken and zucchini stir fry. I typically make 2-3 portions so that I have lunch for the following day. I have really only started to cook and eat like a human adult in the last year, and it’s made a huge difference in my life. I have no idea how I fed myself in college. Call my boyfriend for a few hours and go to bed at 10:30.

Daily total: $657.40

Wednesday:
Up at the usual 7:30. I haven’t mentioned it, but I do eat greek yogurt every morning at work. I load it with fresh berries, so it’s basically a glorified sugar bowl. Another slow, slow day.

My mom texts me that she put some money in my checking account for the flight (+$350). I feel bad and better at the same time. 

Leftovers for lunch. I’m wearing my new pair of boots which are not the most comfortable things in the world, so I skip the walk. I sit in the courtyard next to my building and read, but I get cold and decide to treat myself to a scone ($5.17). I stand in a sunny spot outside the cafe and soak it in. The scone is not good, but I want to die a little less. 

I have to stay until 6 on Wednesdays, which is honestly not bad. I love the guaranteed overtime pay and everyone is usually gone by 5:30, so I can just read. By the time I head home, I have about 50 pages left of the novel and I do not want to put it down. I read it in a flurry on the subway (still free) and finish it at home. A solid 7.5/10. 

Goodles are a staple lazy dinner for me. I have been into Negronis for the past few weeks, so I treat myself to one with dinner and another one while I call my boyfriend. Trying to work out my relationship with alcohol post-grad is weird. 

Daily total: +$344.83

Thursday:
We know the drill: up at 7:30, subway ($3.00), yogurt, try not to cry at work. I have one more portion of chicken and zucchini for lunch and walk through the park. 

But, I’ve had exciting post-work plans for weeks! I head to the East Village after work and grab a glass of wine and a hummus appetizer at a wine bar ($43.00). This would’ve been $20 in Wisconsin, sigh. Then I head to the Strand where I have tickets to see Hernan Diaz speak about his new novel, Ply. I am an anxiously punctual person, so of course I am there 30 minutes before the doors open and I mindlessly wander around the store. I bought the ticket a few weeks ago, I believe it was about $40. 

As about the third person there, I sit right in front and marvel at my signed copy. Diaz is incredibly intelligent and well-spoken, and I end up lining up to get my copy personalized. I try not to scare him with my excitement as I did to Lily King when I saw her speak in Madison last fall.

My friend is in town with her mom and sister for Harry Styles and I have about half an hour to kill until dinner, so I wander around the village and call my boyfriend. Everyone arrives, including my two other college friends who live in the city, and my heart is so warm. I miss my friends more than anything. I get a glass of wine and chicken pad kee mao, my staple Thai dish. It’s good, but I think I’m starting to get tired of ordering the same thing at every Thai restaurant (and I’m half Thai!)

My friend’s mom ends up paying for the whole thing, which similarly makes me feel both guilty and relieved. My usual subway line is, of course, down for the night so I have a tiring, long journey home ($3.00). I take a shower and go to bed at 11:30.

Daily total: $52.00

Friday:
Up at 7:30 and sneak in a quick piece of avocado toast as I head out. Fontaines DC album release day! I listen to it on the subway ($3.00) and have my leftover pad kee mao for lunch. It’s a Friday, so I’m in a good mood at work. 

I head home at 5 ($3.00). I stop at the wine store right by my apartment and grab a bottle of pinot ($18.49), I love this place but miss my $5 Costco wine dearly. I also stop at the grocery store for a couple staples ($23.64). 

Chicken and sweet potatoes for dinner and catch up on my Great British Baking Show. Bread week was a shitshow. Talk to my boyfriend for a little bit and end up almost killing the bottle of wine. Go to bed at midnight and wish I had skipped the last glass. 

Daily total: $48.13

Saturday
I sleep in until 10, thank God. Head to the farmers market as I’m attempting to make my own Chipotle bowls. Grab some corn, peppers, onion, cilantro, tomatoes, as well as potatoes and apples ($22.15)

I signed up for a Liftonic class in the West Village at noon, so I scarf down some avocado toast and head out ($3.00). Quickly decided that Six Shot Morning is my favorite song on the album and listen to it on repeat. I don’t love weight lifting, so thought a class would help. It’s just alright. 

Go to Sephora to buy a red lipstick for a Halloween costume, because I somehow don’t own one. Also grab a lip liner ($31.57). It’s chilly today, and I love it. The people wrapped up in boots and scarves make me giggle. Decide to grab a froyo from Birdies and splurge on the cookie dough in a panic order. The yogurt is good but regret the splurge on the dough ($12.43). 

Head home ($3.00) and start whipping up my bowls. I feel like a mad scientist in my mini toy kitchen, but it gets done in about an hour. They’re pretty damn good. My friend buys us tickets for a Halloween party in Williamsburg, so I venmo her $50.

We decide to meet at my friend’s hotel, so I get ready and finish off the last bit of wine. Take the subway to K-Town ($3.00) We have some wine in the room that they had already bought and head out the West Village around 9:30. I buy us a round of vodka sodas ($40.00) at the Stonewall Inn before we head next door to the Duplex and dance for a while. One of my friends gets the next round, so we just call it even.

We end up wandering for a while before deciding to grab some pizza and call it a night around 12:30. My friend buys the pizza and I head home ($3.00). Despite my best water drinking efforts, I know I will be hungover the next day. 

Daily total: $165.15

Weekly Totals: 
Food + Drink: $195.97
Fun / Entertainment: $50
Home + Health: $52.48
Clothes + Beauty: $31.57
Transport: $38.00
Other: $305.40

Lastly, reflect on your diary! 
Obviously, the flights stick out here. But otherwise, this was a pretty normal week for me. I didn’t eat out for lunch at all, which I’m proud of. I’m really just starting to settle in here, so not buying as many apartment things or offhand moving costs (I think of the $355 I spent on a new lock when I locked myself out in my first month). It does seem like every time I start to feel like my finances are balancing out, I have to make a huge purchase like this travel. But, that’s life.

How does this after-tax budget look like for living in a luxury high rise in downtown Chicago? Would prob be no more than a convertible studio. No car (the car policy i have is a non owner policy for when I rent cars). No debt. Travel budget is separate. Retirement savings are separate. I already have an emegenxy fund.

I'm a 30F living in a HCOL state of the USA. I'm single, no kids.

I have no debt, a low-cost monthly mortgage (with under $150k left), about $25k in savings, and $50k in 401k/Roth combined. I invest about $120 of my paycheck every week into my 401k.

I feel extremely grateful for my situation but feeling stuck on how to progress in my life financially and career-wise.

I have a bachelors degree from an average/unimpressive private school in journalism.

Work history is primarily in the real estate sector; I started in residential when I was 23 and moved to the corporate commercial side at 27. I currently work as a financial commercial re analyst for a Fortune 100 company.

I've been in my role for almost 4 years. I've gotten increasing responsibility and oversight, but no title change or, most importantly, salary increase beyond the annual 3% bonus and small permanent bonus that everyone receives. I started making $85k and am currently at $90k / year.

I'd like to get married and have children, but I'd also want a stable career that has flexibility with time off.

There are many reasons as to why I don't want to stay in my current position, but the biggest one is that there's no future here and it's a dead end. Management for my team refuses to build up employees and it takes on average 5-10 years to be promoted into a different title and the salary increase is negligible.

Here are the paths I'm considering:

1. Trying to find another similar role at a different company > Difficult because there are very few around my area. Those that are, are primarily commission based. I'd be willing to invest in taking courses to gain more accreditation, knowledge, and expertise.
2. Keep my current role but start doing residential real estate on the side?
3. Getting a masters in business with a focus on real estate finance > The biggest con here is that I'd still be working an office job and these jobs are primarily in the city - I live 1.5 hours away from the city and am already making that commute with my current job (although it's only 2 days a week, it's still taking a massive toll on my body - 3 to 4 hr commute each day). My company will pay partial tuition but it'll still be expensive.
4. Changing roles at my company > Doing something completely different. HR, community relations, etc? Hopefully with a team that values me and will help grow me
5. Going back to school for something completely different. I've been thinking about social work so I can work as a private practice therapist. I have a connection who I'd be able to do my practicums with. My parents have generously offered to pay for my in state school tuition and help me with monthly bills if needed. I just get worried about losing financial autonomy and missing out on the 7 years of experience I've already built up in the real estate sector. Then again, I'm really desperate for solid mentorship and am desiring to grow professionally - the stagnation is worn me down.
6. Start a business while keeping my current role or taking on another role at my company. I know most businesses fail. I do have an idea for something that I think could be great, but I'm not delusional by any means and I know this is going to be a grind with little guarantee of success. It's still the option I feel most passionate about and drawn to though.
7. Work at the shelter where I volunteer - The pay is around 70-80k to do something unrelated, but I don't want the place where I go to for peace and joy to be ruined if the professional side sucks.

Annual salary goal before 35 would ideally be $150k+. I'd love to pay off my mortgage ASAP before 45.

I live frugally and mindfully. Track every little expense and have been budgeting seriously since I was a college student.

I have no idea what to do or where to go from here. Any advice would be much appreciated.

I read this interesting Substack article about how people have been making money after losing their jobs: https://laid0ff.substack.com/p/writing-content-for-an-ai-astrology. It’s pretty interesting to see the different things people have been doing, from selling stuff to taking on gig work.

Being unemployed is financially difficult, especially if you don’t have a partner to rely on for financial support. So I wanted to ask: For those of you who are or have been unemployed without a partner’s financial support, how have you been getting by? And if you’re now working in a field unrelated to the one you lost your job in, what field are you working in?

Hey everyone,

Did something good happen to you this week? Share below!

I want to preface this by saying how insanely lucky I am and how privileged I feel to be even asking this question.

TDLR: I have 300k in retirement savings. No debt, house paid off, car paid off. 80k salary. What should I do from here? I’m 40yo woman with no kids or partner but am the caretaker for my disabled sibling.

Very long, did read:
At the end of 2024 I received a very unexpected inheritance of around 400k. I am the caretaker for my high functioning autistic sister who also received the same amount. We decided that she will use the majority of hers as a safety net for the future and I will continue to pay for her daily living in the sense of food, rent, utilities, etc. She was in the process of applying for disability when we received the inheritance and is using it similarly to how she would have used SSDI, which she obviously won’t qualify for now. She is much better with money and more risk adverse than I am.

From the inheritance I paid off my student loans, replaced my 13yo Toyota Corolla with a new hybrid Toyota Corolla that I hope to drive another 13 years, and now, along with my sister, am in the process purchasing a townhome in cash. I also took a trip to Ireland where I have wanted to go basically since I could form memories. 🇮🇪

After all that I have about 200k left in my brokerage (170k) and 30k in a 401k and Roth IRA at this moment, but my sister is paying me back slowly for her portion of the home, which will total to 100k over 2-3 years.

I make 80k a year. That’s our only household income. Neither of us have kids or are married. I’m 40 and she’s 42. We are spinsters living in our old crones nest and love it. My sister is my best friend in the world and like a second mom to me. If die, all of my assets are going to my sister (and her dog) and vice versa.

We live in the US in a HCOL city. The major concern for climate change here is heat and windstorms.

I’m asking what to do from here/what would you do from here so I can retire comfortably around 65 without counting on social security because of, you know, America.

I’ve looked at retirement calculators and estimating about 2.2 million for me to live on approximately the same monthly income (4k), which I assume will be much less money in 25 years. To get there from where I’m at now, I’ll need to save about 1.1k monthly. I put $600 a month in a 401k and plan to put $500 a month in a Roth IRA.

I have a 6 month emergency fund of 27k in a HYSA with 3.1% API. I will add about $200 a month to it to save for home maintenance.

I do have 6k in credit card debt entirely due to overspending and refuse to use my inheritance to pay it off because I don’t want to set that precedent. I can pay it off with my salary. Once I do plan to only use the card for emergencies.

I guess I just want to see what other (smarter) people would do in this scenario and if there are things I’m not thinking of?

Welcome to the "Salary Saturday" thread!

If you’re seeking advice from the sub regarding your specific situation, it belongs here. Great topics include:

• Negotiation/pay/benefits
• Job offers
• Interviewing
• Anything else related to careers, work, salaries, etc.

Bring us your burning questions!

How are you spending, scrimping, splurging, or saving?

What are you doing with your hard-earned £$€ this week?

I was thinking about the Privilege Walk recently and thought it might be fun to apply a Money Diaries angle to it.

So you start at 0 and add or subtract points for any true statements.

Max is 28 and min is -18.

* (+3): My parents paid for my college, so I graduated without student loans.

* (+2): My family pays for (or paid for well into my 20s) things like my phone plan or health insurance.

* (+2): My family has given me money for a wedding, car, or home purchase.

* (+2): I've received a windfall or inherited money that was not specifically for any of the above purchases.

* (+2): If I lost my job tomorrow, my family could comfortably support me until I found another one.

* (-2): I had to take an unpaid internship to get into my industry, even though it meant using savings or going into debt.

* (+2): I own a home outright.

* (+1): My mortgage rate is less than 4%.

* (-1): My monthly housing payment is over 30% of my household income.

* (-3): I've experienced housing insecurity.

* (+2): I travel for leisure regularly.

* (+2): I can buy groceries, order takeout, or go out for drinks without checking my bank balance.

* (+2): I automatically save or invest money every month without having to think about it.

* (+1): I regularly spend $15+ on things like coffee, lunch, or workout classes without worrying about the cost.

* (-1): I regularly turn down plans or suggest cheaper places because I can't afford what my friends want to do.

* (-2): An unexpected $500 expense would put me into debt or mess up my finances for months.

* (-3): I've gone more than one day without eating because I couldn't afford food.

* (+2): I live alone in an expensive city and can afford it without roommates.

* (+2): I pay for conveniences like a house cleaner, laundry service, or grocery delivery.

* (+1): I live in a dual income household.

* (+1): I have a career with predictable raises and feel comfortable negotiating my salary.

* (-1): My commute takes up a significant chunk of my income or unreliable transportation puts my job at risk.

* (+1): I can talk openly about salaries, investments, and money with friends without feeling judged.

* (-1): I feel pressure to buy expensive clothes, skincare, or other things to fit in at work.

* (-2): I regularly send money to support my parents, siblings, or other family members.

* (-2): I'm the first in my family to navigate corporate life, investing, or things like high-yield savings accounts.

I don't have kids, so I wasn't sure what to add to that. Maybe paying for daycare (-) vs family help (+)? But also affording expensive activities is a (+).

I'm at 17, and my husband is at 5, which is kind of crazy but makes sense. Those minus points really make a difference.

Charlie, a recent college grad, comes from a wealthy family—and he has complicated feelings about it. That's part of what drew him to a job in the Netherlands, which he hopes might offer a greater sense of equality, its stronger public services, and overall better “vibes” than the US. We follow Charlie through his first week in the workforce and see how it changes the way he thinks about money, privilege, and his own country.

Spotify Link: https://open.spotify.com/episode/23SkGemha5A8Ck9SAL9GfZ?si=asbZlTLqSXOrq-5r-gefnQ

Assets:

• Traditional 401(k): $35,000
• Roth IRA: $27,000
• Taxable brokerage: $58,000
• Savings: $39,000
• Checking: $2000

No debt other than whatever’s on my credit card at the time.

Net worth: $161,000

Income:
Pharmacist average monthly take-home: $4000

• 401(k) and additional tax withholding come out of my pharmacist paycheck

Musician average monthly take-home: $3000

I graduated in 2025, so this is my first full calendar year of being a pharmacist. The $130k figure in the post title is a (hopefully) conservative estimate of what I’ll gross for 2026. I work part-time and have a variable schedule for both roles.

Fixed expenses:
Monthly:

• Rent: $1502.49 (rent itself + stupid transaction fee)
• Internet: $40
• Electricity: $105 (my 12-month average)
• Parking: $102
• Subscriptions: $14.06
  • $1.07: Adam Ellis on Patreon (comes out of my PayPal balance, so I don’t often actually pay this)
  • $4.99: Dropout
  • $8: New York Magazine
• Invisalign: $500 (I’m on a payment plan with my provider, and I’ll be done paying next May)

Fixed monthly total: $2263.55

Annual:

• Credit card annual fee: $95
• Distributor for original music: $44.99
• Substack: $80 (The Rebel Yellow)
• Spotify Premium: $99 (after my student discount ended, I used a $99 gift card for a year of premium, but it seems Spotify just got rid of these gift cards, SMH)

Fixed annual total: $318.99

I am still on my parents’ health insurance, car insurance, and phone plan.

Day 1: Tuesday

12 PM: I work at the pharmacy at noon, so I eat brunch at home beforehand, bring yesterday’s latte to work with me, and eat my packed linner during my break. In general, my meals consist of some combination of leftovers and foods that require little-to-no prep like microwavable/air-fryable frozen stuff, fruit, and yogurt.

8:30 PM: I buy groceries after work (the list if you’re curious: tangerines, white nectarines, baby carrots, tomatoes, 2 bags of chips, frozen vegetables, a single-serve frozen meal, and ice cream), most of which is on sale. $24.38

9 PM: I have a snack once I get home.

Day 1 total: $24.38

Day 2: Wednesday

12 PM: Since I don't work today, I take my time cooking lunch at home. It's exceedingly mid because, frankly, I'm not that good at cooking.

4 PM: I sit on my balcony and do my nails. I love hanging out on my balcony, and I'll miss it once it gets too cold.

6 PM: I go to dance class at the drop-in studio near me. I prepaid for an unlimited 6 months, so nothing is owed today. I’m not a very good dancer, but it’s fun, and it’s the only way I’ll exercise consistently. The vibes at this studio are very much like the women’s restroom at a club (I love your skirt!! You’re so hot!!! Yesss, girl!!).

7 PM: I eat dinner at home. 

8 PM: I send the link to a concert I’m interested in to my best friend, but it turns out both of us have prior obligations that night. That’s something I’m sad I don’t get to spend money on!

9 PM: I have a can of sparkling water (a daily staple for me) as I practice music.

Day 2 total: $0

Day 3: Thursday

10:30 AM: My perfume subscription box charges my card this morning. I don’t count it as a fixed monthly expense because I opt out some months. $29.91

12 PM: Once again, I eat brunch at home before work and eat leftovers (plus a pastry somebody brought to share) at work for linner. I give approximately 5 million vaccines today.

8:30 PM: After work, I browse the neighboring Goodwill. I buy 3 little trinket dishes, which are something I've been keeping an eye out for. $9

9:30 PM: When I get home, I have a snack and, of course, a can of sparkling water as I practice music.

Day 3 total: $38.91

Day 4: Friday

12 PM: I eat lunch at home, accompanied by a can of sparkling water.

3 PM: I get a free latte from a coffee shop's soft opening. I also go to the Spirit Halloween next door but don't buy anything. I've already got my three Halloween costumes ready, but I love Halloween and just like to browse.

6 PM: During the break between rehearsal and my gig for tonight, I eat the dinner I packed (the remainder of Wednesday's lunch).

7:30 PM: Show time!

2 AM: I bring home some of the leftover catering from tonight, which is my life hack for reducing both my grocery spend and time/energy spent on cooking.

Day 4 total: $0

Day 5: Saturday

11 AM: After covering for another pharmacist for a few hours in the morning, I stop by the nearby Marshalls and Ulta. At Ulta, I buy an eyeshadow (something that was on my wishlist) and a lip gloss (an impulse buy). $19.26

1 PM: After a small lunch at home, I go to dance class.

3 PM: My pookie C and I go to a flea market; I pay the entrance fee for both of us ($10). I buy two things that were on my wishlist ($22). C buys both of us a fun latte (about $18 total), and he buys 2 dresses for me ($8) that I'm hesitant about because they would both be impulse buys. $32

6 PM: After the market, C and I get dinner out together, which is a rarity for us because we usually cook at home (i.e. he cooks, and I eat his cooking). He pays (about $80 total).

8 PM: Show time!

Day 5 total: $51.26

Day 6: Sunday

1 PM: Small lunch at home → dance class.

3:30 PM: I run into and chat with some of my favorite neighbors.

4 PM: I hang out with my pharmacy coworker A at his apartment, the primary purpose being to meet his cat. Said cat is very cute, as is the nature of cats.

5:30 PM: I eat dinner at home.

7 PM: I go to my friend K's weekly craft night. K provides some snacks, and somebody else bakes cookies as part of her crafting procrastination (AKA craftstination). K's cats are also very cute.

Day 6 total: $0

Day 7: Monday

7 AM: I used to eat breakfast in the car if I worked in the morning, but since having aligners, my “breakfast” tends to be just an energy drink, and today is no exception.

8 AM: Pharmacy time! We give close to a bajillion vaccines in just the first hour of opening.

12:30 PM: I eat my regular ol’ packed lunch.

6 PM: After work, I go to my first dance class of the day.

7 PM: During my break between classes, I go home to eat dinner.

8 PM: I go to dance class #2.

9 PM: Once I get home, I clean and chill for the rest of the night.

Day 7 total: $0

Weekly total: $114.55

• Food/drink: $24.38
• Fun/entertainment: $10
• Home/health: $9
• Clothes/beauty: $71.17
• Transport: $0
• Other: $0

Reflection

This was a lower-spend week for me because I happened to not have any larger non-weekly expenses like gas, more expensive shopping, charitable giving, tattoos, etc. I also went in-person shopping more than I usually do.

Otherwise, this was a generally representative week. I don’t go out to eat often, and I buy a lot of sparkling water/energy drinks/fun drinks in bulk from the grocery store. I usually get a coffee/tea out once or twice a week, but my two fun drinks out happened to both be free-to-me lattes this week.

Clothing and beauty stuff (but not beauty services!) is where I’m happy to splurge; it's my largest spending category after rent.

Have you read anything good lately? Share below!