r/homeowners • u/Busy-Staff-7215 • 20h ago
š¤ Vent / Rant Bet you canāt guess what I found in the attic crawlspace of our new house. Spoiler
My wife and I bought a house built in ā77. Total fixer-upper. It sat vacant for over a decade before we purchased it.
We got straight to work cleaning, refinishing floors, taking out a wall, painting, etc. It was musty and stale at first, the prior owners had been smokers, but by the end of the first couple months everything looked and smelled fresh and clean. Everything, except the second bedroom on the upper floor.
No matter how much we cleaned, how much activated charcoal we used, it still smelled vaguely like a warm, moldy, piss soaked blanket. We were frustrated, but made a bit of a breakthrough when I replaced the ceiling fan, which required some light drywall repair. I noticed the smell worsened during the course of this work. So reluctantly, I prepared to climb up into the small attic crawlspace above our top floor⦠in late August⦠in Virginia.
The access hatch was on the far side of the house but crawling across to the second bedroom was easy due to the plywood laid across the joists. At first glance there was nothing suspicious. It smelled like an old crawlspace, just super hot and musty, but nothing like the smell below. I decided I should pull up the plywood above the fan to check for water damage and mold. Honestly, I think I would have preferred some mold or moistureā¦
Piles of shit. Not a figure of speech, but literal piles of old desiccated shit (see photo). At least thatās what it looked like. I told myself that I was being ridiculous and surely it must be weirdly moldy insulation that just looked like shit. But someone had clearly cut through the wood previously to access to this specific spot and none of the surrounding areas showed any signs of water damage or mold. Without any other ideas I decided to regroup and figure out how best to deshittify the attic.
Animal feces, especially from wild animals, can contain some really nasty bacteria that you definitely donāt want to be breathing in. So I masked up, gloved up, threw on a tyvek suit and some gloves, and headed back up with a 5 gallon bucket and a shop vac.
An hour and 7.5 gallons of shit later, the offending area was cleaned out, bleached, and deodorized with active charcoal bags. A couple weeks later and the smell FINALLY went away. After further investigation, Iām convinced it was cat shit.
Without getting overly descriptive, it had the right consistency and contained hair when broken apart. I assumed cat because of the size and the fact that itās probably the most readily available if someone were to start assembling a shit arsenal. The remaining question is why.
Credit where credit is due, putting cat shit above someoneās ceiling fan is nefarious. It turns the air from the fan into a silent but deadly, never ending cat fart. I just canāt imagine what the previous owners did to wrong someone to this degree while still providing them access to their attic!!
On the plus side, if Iām ever wronged to that degree Iām locked and loaded with a wild revenge scheme.
Anyone ever seen the likes of this shit?!