Sorry, all. We do not mean to kink shame here, but lately the mods have been removing a lot of posts that seem less like “meet up” posts and more like fantasies or “shock” posts.

For future posts, please do not include detailed sexual fantasies about the things you want to do with a partner. State what you are looking for and save the details of your fantasy for private conversations.

Along the same lines, please do not include detailed descriptions of extreme sex acts you wish to perform with someone else. This includes (but is not limited to) rape (CNC), scat, blood, or bondage. The word “rape” has always been prohibited here (requesting someone looking for CNC is permitted), but graphic details of CNC encounters may be troubling for people who did not consent to read them. This also applies to anything that would be more at home in a subreddit dedicated to kinks or fetishes. The generic terms are acceptable (for now), but the descriptions of how and where have to stop.

We’re also declaring a moratorium on the words “virgin” or “virginity” (or any wiggle words or phrases that mean the same thing). At this point, an 18 year old claiming to be a virgin makes us worry that they aren’t really old enough to post here. Plus some folks have been posting about their virginity for YEARS, so it seems to fall under the “fantasy” category.

We will be updating the automod to reflect this rule change, but please do us a favor and honor this adjustment so we don’t have to remove your post. Thank you!

One of the drawbacks of Reddit is we have 10,000 characters to explain a ban, but we only have 500 to lay down a rule. So allow me to expound on Rule # 4.

• No Selling Content, Advertising for Content Production, "Show Off" Posts, or "Karma-whoring" This sub is for private, non-commercial connections between Redditors, not for talent recruitment or advertising premium services (including within your profile). Any posts with leading questions without a specific "ask" associated with "R4R" will be handled using this rule. If you want to "show off" your attributes without an R4R connection, please use one of the subreddits made for that purpose.

So, what the hell does that mean. That rule covers a lot of ground—maybe too much for one rule. Perhaps we'll look at breaking it up. For now, I'll cover the rule in detail as it currently exists.

1. No selling content. That means you cannot promote your fan site in the subreddit. You cannot promote your Snapchat in the subreddit. You cannot encourage people to visit your Cashapp or your Venmo or your GoFundMe. If you want people to go outside of this site to interact with you, you may not do so in your post or comments. That will result in an immediate and permanent ban. It also means you cannot promote a "friend's" content. You cannot tell people to visit your wife's Snapchat. If you are using a profile that promotes your fansite or requests money in any way, you may not post in r/orlandor4r, even if your post isn't asking for money.
2. Advertising for Content Production. You may not look for people to help you create content. Don't ask for performers. Don't ask for models. Don't ask for videographers. Again, if your profile bio is promoting a hunt for subscriber-driven content, do not post in r/orlandor4r.
3. "Show Off" Posts. Posts that belong in r/gonewild style subreddits do not belong here. If your post contains the line "Do you like my _________?" then the answer you will probably get from the moderators is "No. Go away." Posts must include your age, a "gender" tag, and a description with details and a specific "ask." Low-effort posts will get removed, and show-off posts will, most likely, get you banned.
4. "Karma-whoring." I'm not going to go into a lot of detail on this one, because this is a tactic used by people trying to drive up karma on an account because they plan on selling it (or spamming subs with it) later. We get a surprising number of these posts, because a strategic post in a lightly-moderated local R4R can drive upvotes into the stratosphere. Especially if there are boobs. It's generally pretty obvious when people are doing this, and I'm not going to reveal our strategies for uncovering it.

We do not treat rule violations lightly. From experience, temporary bans for stuff like this rarely works. Hell, the permanent bans don't seem to deter them. If you violate one of these rules, you will probably be banned. (It's case-by-case for point three, because sometimes people don't mean to make a "show-off" post.)

Some of the people who have had their posts removed and/or gotten banned from the subreddit have gotten pretty pissed at us for this. "Power-tripping mods" is the accusation most often tossed out. This subreddit has increased in size about 30% since I requested it after it was banned for several months, so many of you may not be aware of the sub's history. It was banned because of the amount of unsolicited commercial posts that clogged the page. Reddit was very clear that the mod team had a responsibility to ensure that posts that do not conform to our posting rules must be handled. And we handle them.

If you see a post that explicitly violates the rules of this subreddit, PLEASE do not engage directly with the poster. Downvote it. Report it. Hide it. Block the poster. But please don't comment. And if you encourage the poster or support them with a comment like, "I'd love to make content with you," you run the risk of losing your posting/commenting privileges here as well.

Thanks for taking the time to read this post.