r/IVFAfterSuccess • u/M_Dupperton • Oct 25 '20

Welcome to r/IVFAfterSuccess! PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING OR COMMENTING

12 Upvotes

Welcome to IVFAfterSuccess! We are a community for those who have had one or more children while undergoing infertility treatment that included IVF, and who are now wishing for more children or in the process of trying again through ART. We come together to discuss our current/future treatment as well as parenting and life in general.

MEMBERSHIP

All of our members went through IVF in trying for their existing child(ren), though some may have found their success through another path (e.g., spontaneous conception during a break between IVF cycles, IUI cycle after IVF failure). Most of our members are cis-women, however all gender identities are welcome.

Of note, our sub is not intended for those with secondary infertility who are now undergoing ART for the first time. In that circumstance, we recommend r/secondaryinfertility and r/infertility. However, we do welcome those with secondary infertility who used ART that includes IVF in trying for one or more of their existing children.

RECURRING THREADS

We prefer most discussions go into our recurring threads, as this builds community more so than many isolated stand-alone posts. We currently offer the following recurring threads, though the timing and content of recurring threads is up for consideration as our community evolves.

- Weekly Treatment Thread: For anything treatment-related, including updates on your current cycle, questions about medications, advice, etc.

- Weekly Chat Thread: For anything not related to treatment – parenting, life, news, whatever.

- Weekly Pregnancy Results & Early Pregnancy Concerns Thread: We limit this content to specific threads as members may not always have the bandwidth to view it, even when they overall wish success for one another. If the community prefers, we can consider splitting the positive results and early concerns thread into separate spaces, and/or transitioning to a monthly thread for both or either.

- Monthly New Member Introduction Thread: This is an optional space to share your story - including treatment, family, personal, etc. Just whatever you'd like to share. Please consider including the month that you posted in your flair, so that we can more easily locate your history down the road.

RULES

1) Be kind. We vary in the number of existing children, previous difficulties faced, and goals for family size, as well as with prognoses and resources for current/future treatment. We are all worthy of support; however, jealousies and tensions may be inevitable given our diversity. Please be mindful in managing these feelings and avoid triggering them in others to the extent possible. If a comment rubs you the wrong way, give feedback kindly or report it to the mods.

2) Positive pregnancy results go in the weekly Results thread. This space is meant for news from active members, not for first-time posters. Any discussions related to early pregnancy, including beta limbo and other uncertainties, also go only in the weekly thread. We do not permit photos of HPTs. Negative pregnancy test results can be discussed anywhere.

3) Respect evidence-based medicine. Comments that discuss the medical aspects of treatment must be consistent with research evidence or clearly reflect only anecdotal data.

4) Avoid cutesy fertility-related acronyms. We generally follow the list at r/infertility: https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/wiki/bannedterms.

5) We are pro-choice. We respect our members' right to make their own reproductive decisions. It is one thing to say that you would never personally make a certain choice, another to speak against others having the right to choose for themselves. Posts/comments that suggest otherwise will be removed and offending posters will be banned

6) We are pro-LGBTQ. Posts/comments that suggest otherwise will be removed and offending posters will be banned

7) No medication solicitations or give-aways. Infertility treatment may be even more difficult to finance when balanced with the needs of existing children. However, we are unable to act as a forum for sharing medications given potential liabilities.

8) No advertising or solicitation without mod approval.

GUIDELINES

** We want to get to know you! We discourage stand-alone introduction posts. However, we do have a monthly Introduction thread where new members can comment with their personal info, including treatment history, ART and non-ART successes, and anything else you’d like to share. A catalogue of past Introduction posts is below. To enable other members to find your intro comment going forward, please consider updating your flare with the month that you joined us.

** Use the weekly threads! As above, we have a weekly and monthly posts. We will transition into daily threads if/when the community grows to warrant daily threads. In the meantime, feel free to comment on these threads multiple times over the course of the week. Stand-alone posts are welcome on more complex topics.

** Discussions of existing children are expected/encouraged. Many of us have complex emotions around family size, however we are also a community of parents. If discussions of others’ existing children are a highly sensitive topic for you, r/infertility may be a better resource.

** Avoid toxic positivity. Some people choose optimism as a coping skill for dealing with uncertainties, and that strategy can work well. However, please respect others whose preferred coping skills are different and please refrain from encouraging false hope.

** Social infertility IS true infertility. We welcome those who turn to ART due to life circumstances - LGBTQ identify, single status, delayed childbearing, and more.

** Have a question or want to give some feedback? Message the mods. We're here to help!

PAST MONTHLY INTRODUCTION THREADS

5 comments

r/IVFAfterSuccess • u/MorganaFrostfire • 48m ago

Looking for reassurance from ICSI + FET moms — healthy babies?

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