This is probably the dumbest question anyone has ever asked, but I know reading to my daughter is important. Is it okay to read her science books that I know are outdated?

We've gotten a bunch of my old books out of my parents' attic, and my mother is in the process of cleaning them page-by-page. Last night I saw a book about Stegosaurus (my favorite childhood dinosaur) and asked if I could take it home with me to read it to her (I'm letting my mother decide what books come to our house and which ones stay at theirs), and she said sure.

The thing is I know that book is literally decades out of date. The illustrations of Stegosaurus aren't right, according to Google the current consensus is that the last surviving Stegosaur lived in China not India, and the "butt brain" myth has long been debunked.

My daughter is currently five months old, she doesn't understand what I'm saying yet, but as much as I loved that book as a child, I feel guilty with her growing up with a book I know is scientifically inaccurate on her bookshelf.

On the flip side, though, I guess it could eventually be a chance to talk to her about how science advances.

What do you guys think?

Hey fellas this is for the special needs dads out their it’s almost Halloween and I wanna take my daughter out but I don’t know what to do with since she’s special needs and doesn’t walk or crawl we have a specialized wheelchair for her, just need some ideas on what to do fellas I would really appreciate it

#father #fatherhood #upbringing #mother #sonfather #fatherson

Just had a baby boy a little over 4 weeks ago. It is our first. My wife has PPD and is not bonding with him, which is immensely stressful for both of us. I absolutely love both of these two, and am trying my best to be a loving, caring, supportive husband and father. But I find myself agitated and irritated with so many little things. I’m fighting with my wife constantly and we are often s apping at each other. And I get agitated when I can’t get my son to stop crying. He’s honestly great and usually pretty quiet but occasionally just gets fussy for no apparent reason or goes into loud crying and screaming when he’s hungry before I can get his bottle prepped. My stress levels are through the roof, I’m beyond sleep deprived, and I just don’t know how to do better. Any advice as to how to deal with this is welcome.

I have a 14-year-old son and high expectations for his schoolwork, behavior, character, habits, and responsibilities. I want to raise him into a good, capable man.

Naturally, he's at an age where he challenges my authority and sometimes wants to be the man of the house. I feel he respects me, but our relationship can sometimes feel more like a power struggle than a close father-son bond.We don't hug or say we love each other as often as I'd like. Likely my fault.

How can a dad maintain discipline and high expectations without sacrificing a close, loving relationship with their sons?

Hey new parents,

We have an amazing 9 months old kid, and me and my partner have been together for 13 years.

She's a very sociable person, while me on the contrary, I've always been quite the loneliner.

Nevertheless before becoming parents, we were doing plenty of stuff together and I was also going out at least 1-2 times per week with my buddies.

Even thought she needed social contact more than I do, I was on board with that most of the time.

Since the little one arrived, time is limited and I feel like something changed within my needs as I am constantly seeking solitude much more.

I feel exhausted by social activities and contacts, whether this is with my friends but also my partner, so I look forward to the nap times or the evenings to mind my own business. It can be by taking a walk, working out or play videogame but the bottom line is that I just want to be alone and possibly in silence.

I am starting to wonder whether this is normal as it has been lasting for a while now, and I don't see that going away anytime soon.

I saw my 76 year old father today with my son and took him out to lunch. The concept of him passing away crushes my soul... for those of you that have lost your parents, how do you move on with life? I really don't know how I will deal with his passing...

Not sure if this is the right sub, but I could use some advice from other fathers.

My wife apparently experienced a lot of mistreatment from her own mother growing up, Cinderella-style, and I believe she has unresolved PTSD that has affected how she treats our kids.

For over 14 years, I’ve adjusted my schedule to be present and buffer the kids from the situation while hoping she’d work on herself, but she hasn’t.

I’m now considering separation, and my biggest fear is what happens during her 50% custody time. I worry the kids may start avoiding home, staying out longer, or isolating themselves in their rooms.

Would it help to explain the cycle of generational trauma to my teenagers so they can better understand what’s happening, without making them feel like they have to choose sides? Their mom isn’t interested in having this conversation with them.

How would you handle this as a father?

My wife and I have a 2 1/2 year-old daughter, and just two days ago had air newborn son.

For the past several months, we’ve been putting our little girl down at night, by reading some books, and then lying with her for maybe 15 to 20 minutes. At which point we leave.

But just the past few nights she’s so desperate for me to stay in her room, and is almost panicked, but won’t fall asleep if I’m in there very much.

I feel like I’d have to be in there all night just for her to fall asleep.

I don’t really know what to do. What do you recommend?

Nunca pensei em ser pai, porém a 1 mês, tive uma relação casual com uma ex-namorada e ela está grávida.

Moramos em cidades diferentes, estamos em contato, estou tentando ajudar emocionalmente e financeiramente, porém sinto-me culpado e não sei o que fazer. Eu só queria que isso não tivesse acontecido.

Se ao menos, nós fossemos um casal, tivessimos nos preparado para isso, fruto de um amor verdadeiro e objetivo de vida.

Me assombra a ideia de não me apegar a essa criança, os impactos que causaria na vida dela, de não estar presente, pois moro em outra região distante.

Caso algum pai, já tenha passado por isso, peço que comente e se possivel, diga como lidou com a situação.

I should be sleeping right now, but my daughter woke up about an hour ago and started demanding for about 5-10 minutes that I go in and rock her some more (I rocked her until she fell asleep in my arms, and often rock her for quite a while before she’s ready to go into the crib without bolting right back up and reaching for me). She was throwing her chest against the rail of the crib and screaming. It has me worried sick. This happened an hour ago and I have been feverishly looking up what I can do to help her, what to do if the crib rail breaks and she falls and hurts herself, what to do if she climbs out of the crib and hits her head (she’s a capable two year old, but she has not successfully done this yet). I know that rationally none of these things will happen, but every little thing makes my heart skip. I don’t want her to feel like I’m constantly hovering over her, but I just feel like I can’t help it.

Lately, I have been having trouble exiting the Daddy mindset.

This is actually fine when I am around my kid, but it's a problem, for example, when my partner and I are alone after bedtime is done. I just can't switch off parent brain.

It's like the libido is completely gone as soon as I step in the house, but then outside the house, a light breeze could set me off.

It's a weird experience.

Has anyone else had this?

I’m a 22 year old guy whose girlfriend told him today that she’s pregnant. She came over and showed me multiple positive test while crying. She’s 23 and a high school teacher who still lives with her grandma for reference. Honestly I don’t know what to do. We both come from religious families and believe abortion is wrong and that we made this choice so we should have to live with it. The only time we didn’t use protection she took a morning after pill and I assume that it just didn’t work. I never finished college and I’m currently living at home and supposed to leave for the marine corps by December. I genuinely don’t know exactly what to do as I don’t feel prepared for fatherhood but I love my girlfriend very much and don’t want to leave her or pressure her to get an abortion as I know it would be traumatic for her. If any dads or people who have been in a similar situation could offer me some advice I’d be eternally grateful.

Thanks Dads

Hey guys,

I’m ok, and I think it’s just the exhaustion from my wife’s increasingly straining pregnancy over the past few months (a ton of back and pelvic pain and poor sleep), on top of not sleeping almost at all for the past 23 hours. But, I feel scared. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to have a son! But I feel very conflicted, which makes me feel bad.

Maybe I’m nervous I can’t keep up. Maybe I’m worried about how on earth I’ll survive this.

Idk, but I’m feeling kinda scared and overwhelmed.

I don’t actually need advice. There weren’t any other flare options. Just wanted to kinda vent and see if anyone else relates..

Any other dads on here that work midnights and are filled with stress and guilt for missing everything? I work 6p-5a 4 days a week and it’s killing me. I can’t keep up with the chores bc of sleep and even though the kids are at school during the day, I only see them for like an hour in the morning and then again between the time they get home and I have to leave bc I have an hour commute. It sucks.

We currently have a two year old boy and another boy on the way. We really enjoy focusing our life around our son and prioritizing him. It's given us endless joy.

However I have a lot of anxiety of how it will be with two. I know most people say when the 2nd is here it'll all click and that's probably true but I still can't shake the anxiety.

I'm anxious about both taking away from my 1st but also being able to give to my 2nd in the same capacity as the first.

How to pick and choose the who you do certain bonding things with and such.

Has anyone else felt this and how did you overcome it?

Thanks for any input!

Hey folks,

My wife and I are looking to expand our daughter's library for Christmas. She will be 9 months old by then. We have the tradition of getting each other a book for Christmas Eve, and want to continue that with her. With the onslaught of AI children's books on Amazon, I'm looking for recommendations that don't use AI. Stories that touched your heart, stories your kids loved, or stories with just beautiful art.

I'd love to avoid Amazon, but we live in a small community with no local book store, so sometimes it's unavoidable.

Looking forward to your recommendations!

Long story short, my daughter is 2 years old, and my wife is currently pregnant with our second child. We went to our first ultrasound appointment together, and I was sitting in a chair with my daughter on my lap while the ultrasound was being done.

I remember starting to feel weird, but everything happened so quickly. Before I knew it, I had fainted with my daughter still on my lap. I’m pretty sure I have vasovagal syncope, as I’ve had issues with fainting in certain situations before. I was unconscious for what felt like a couple of minutes, and it took me a little while to fully understand what had happened when I came to.

I hit my nose and forehead pretty hard, and I’m almost certain my daughter got hurt when I fell on her. She was crying nonstop. When I woke up, there were five nurses around us checking to make sure we were okay. They had to stop the ultrasound, and the nurses determined that my daughter had injured her leg in some way.

She hasn’t been able to walk properly since, and it absolutely breaks my heart. I can’t stop thinking that this was all my fault.

We had to cancel everything else and get her checked out as soon as possible. They took X-rays, but they only checked her foot, and no fractures were found. Two different doctors examined her, and she didn’t seem to have any pain in her leg, only in her foot. At this point, we really don’t know what’s going on.

This happened yesterday around 10 a.m., and she still isn’t walking. She wants my wife to hold her constantly. I can’t help but feel like she’s scared of me or hates me, even though I know she’s only 2 and probably doesn’t understand what happened. I hate myself for putting her in this situation.

She’s also barely eating and isn’t going to the bathroom as often as she normally does. It’s incredibly difficult for us to figure out what she needs or wants when she can barely communicate with us. Seeing her like this is heartbreaking, and I feel completely helpless.

We’re not sure how long her recovery will take or how serious the injury might be. We’re hoping it’s something like a sprained ankle, but we just don’t know yet.

Have any other dads experienced fainting during an ultrasound? I thought I had gotten better at handling these situations because I can get shots without any issues. Usually, I only have problems when getting blood drawn, but apparently, ultrasounds can trigger it, too. Something similar almost happened during my first daughter's ultrasound, but I managed not to fully pass out that time.

I just wanted to share my experience and hopefully hear from other dads who have gone through something similar. I’m struggling with a lot of guilt and heartbreak right now. I don’t know how long this will last, and not knowing when my daughter will be okay again is really weighing on me.

If anyone has experienced something similar, whether it was fainting during an ultrasound or accidentally injuring your child in an unexpected situation, I’d really appreciate hearing your story. I could use some reassurance right now.

35 year old dad with 4 kids, Boy 9, daughters 8,5 and 1.5. Split parenting with oldest 3 kids, diagnosed either ADHD 2 years ago. Not sure how to even start this but for a while now I’ve been tired, not the kinda tired sleep helps, I’ll find myself thinking about calling it quits but then think of my kids and would never want to leave them alone. Find myself getting distracted constantly, numb to feeling excited, anxious to be around friends, would rather do projects around the house or turn my brain off. I’ve been taking medication for ADHD for 2 years and it helped at first, at least it helped me be overly productive and now, the best way to put it is dull, life feels like it lost its hue. I’m not sure where to start, I know going back to the gym, reading, meditation and focusing on the positives will pull be back up, I’ve done it plenty of times, this time tho, it feels so heavy and a “what’s the point?”.

Our daughter just turned 6, and it feels like she's already outgrown so many of the toys she used to love. Magnetic tiles, LEGO, her fishing playset, even the cost way bounce house she was obsessed with last year. We hardly ever get it out anymore.

Lately, she's been really into Kpop Demon Hunters, so I'm thinking about getting her something related to it. At the same time, I don't want to keep buying new toys every time she gets into something different, only for them to end up collecting dust a few months later.

Dads with kids around 5 or 6, do yours go through phases like this too? How do you figure out what they'll actually enjoy for more than a few weeks?

I was in a foul mood this morning. My wife and I both work four day weeks, and I have my toddler solo two days a week. He's in the middle of a really tough mummy phase at the moment and is really hard work for both of us.

Anyway, this morning I was in a foul mood. Then while I was on the toilet, he went and pulled all his clothing out of three drawers for the second time in a week. I was nearly apoplectic, but somehow kept my cool.

The came weekly swimming lesson and he started crying before we even got in the water. I nearly bailed on the spot.

I didn't, and somehow found a way to make him laugh (just spat little mouthfuls of water at him) and he relaxed and got through the lesson.

I'm proud of him for doing such a good job at swimming, but I'm also proud of me for managing to keep my cool and then find a way to make it work.

Anyway that's my little dad win for the day. Might take him in the pram to go play golf this afternoon!

Hello everyone first time dad and have no idea what am doing to top off its going to be a girl nothing wrong. Just need books on how to change feed nap and raise a little one

I recently came across a dad post somewhere saying that he (the dad) wished he had recorded his daughter saying “Good morning daddy… I love you” when she was younger to have now set it as his alarm clock to alway wake him up in a good mood.

I have a young daughter that I’ll do this with however whether I’ll keep it continuously I’m not sure as i worry I may start resenting it. However I do like the idea…

Any other suggestions as my daughter is currently 5 years old and I am more than aware of how quick time passes.

Thanks all!

Can't believe why fathers spending time with their kids is so unbelievable in Pakistan. Went to a couple of cafes to spend a couple of hours with my little ones without their mom accompanying us and the stares we get of the majority being in awe is amazing. Is it something rare or do we make people uncomfortable?

First time dad here to a beautiful baby girl (2 weeks old). But my wife is having issues supplying enough milk and is super stressed and upset. I try my hardest to ensure that she’s doing enough and possibly using formula is fine but she seems so upset about it. Is there any tips yall know of that can help. It’s hard seeing my wife so upset about it. Any advice would be great