Former Kohls associate:
With the quarter coming to an end, LP has internal theft quotas to hit. Here’s what to know, and do about being called into the office.
You will most likely be called into the office immediately after clocking in. Your manager or ASM will introduce you to a wonderful face on the computer, a LP detective.
If your thinking “omg am I going to get fired”, you’re already fired. The goal of the meeting is to figure out how much you’ve cost the company, and how long you have been costing the company. Not for you to keep your job.
The LP detective will spend usually about 30 minutes getting to know you, so that they can manipulate a confession out of you. If they seem friendly and understanding it’s because they’re trained on a technique to specifically get you to volunteer information.
The LP detective will then have your ASM or SM give you pieces of paper, this is where they’ll want you to write your statement. DO NOT WRITE ON, OR SIGN THIS PAPER!! Writing on this paper essentially automatically voids your chances of getting any sort of unemployment.
You might also be thinking “oh they won’t fire me”. They will. You’ll either be placed on suspension (so that they can investigate more and fire you in a week) or terminated on the spot.
Best bet after being called to the office and sitting down, is asking if you’re free to leave. The answer will always be yes because Kohls doesn’t want kidnapping on their record 🤣
Remember: DONT SIGN. DONT WRITE. LEAVE.
LP is not here to “get your side of the story” or “clear up any misunderstanding”, they are there to fire you and save the company money.